'twas brillig, and the slithy toves

Anything and everything I find interesting with absolutely no consistent theme. She/they pronouns. Avatar is from https://picrew.me/image_maker/1496263

[mrpuppett]

don’t ever talk to me or my 4500000000 niche AUs ever again

[syn4k]

"lock in" is probably one of the most important phrases to enter the public lexicon in the 2020s

[joyflameball]

[bogleech]

I know it's unfair vilification and stuff but it's also a lot of fun to see old media and stuff where people were SO scared of big animals like lions, sharks, crocodiles and wolves were fully expected to just come and eat you the moment you stepped into their territory. In older media we also made that assumption about gorillas and in still older we thought it'd be whales. But some animals that will actually fuck you up got left behind. Boars will kill you and eat you. They're way more likely to do so than any of those other things actually. Hippos, obviously, got off like bandits always being depicted as cute and dopey. And then there's the squids. Not giant kraken size squids. The eight foot squids that hunt in packs and will fuck you up if you fall in the water at night. I can't BELIEVE people slept on that. It's like all they cared about were the huge deep sea ones we never see. The medium size wolf pack squids were right there.

[bogleech]

Oh some of you don't know about the squids. I talked about them in another thread that went kinda viral somewhere or other but one of the reasons you should not swim in the open ocean at night in many parts of the world is that the water starts teeming with these:

And as you can see it is not like instant death, they too are just animals and they are often just gently curious about the presence of humans! But people who study and dive with sharks will tell you you're safe as long as you stay calm and know what you're doing. The world's leading professional night divers and experts on these squids, specifically??? Stress in every interview and article and paper they write in that you simply do not fuck around with these squids. They know what they're doing and they still all have at least one story of being attacked, in some cases having to be hospitalized. Considering just how rarely anybody puts themselves in the pitch dark nighttime ocean on purpose, let alone during a squid feeding frenzy, it sounds like they're quite a bit more likely to consider you potential food than other marine predators. We also don't know how many fatal attacks might have ever happened, because what humboldt squid like to do with large prey is just drag it away into the darkness forever. The two worst attacks ever proven involved two or three squid at a time latching on to a diver (in BOTH cases they were professionals and knew the risk!) and jetting straight downward with enough force that both divers suffered injury from the sudden pressure change alone, including burst eardrums, nearly passed out and they probably would have died if they hadn't broken free. In general, people who die drowning in the dark open ocean are either never found, or they're found in pieces picked over by enough scavengers that the precise cause of death can only be narrowed down to "the sea." But now you know ONE of "the sea's" possible murder weapons :)

There's a short section on Humboldt squid in Wikipedia's entry for Cephalopod attacks on humans:

Cephalopod attack - Wikipedia

And if you can get past some of Animal Planet's hokey presentation style, this video includes a bit of interview with one of those professional experts who still got nearly squidded from existence:

There is of course some debate about all this, with some arguing that all proven documented attacks occurred on people with reflective diving equipment, which they say the squid must have mistaken for the shine of fish. However, there are lots and lots of people who have to fish around these squids to survive, who do not have access to that kind of equipment, and also have a consensus that if you fall in the water when big squids are out hunting you might disappear without a trace or perhaps just get your head bitten open. With many modern science guys agreeing with this sentiment, this is one case where the "they're just misunderstood sea friends" crowd is kind of outnumbered. The sea at night is theirs and not ours is all. It's not ours during the day either but since we are neither marine nor nocturnal animals we are double fools in the eyes of the squids, which by the way are these eyes:

No for real:

[professorsparklepants]

when picking fancasts people usually go to indian actors when picking stuff for dorne, which is understandable given the large indian diaspora in english speaking countries, and how nearly every visual aspect of their culture fucks hard. but i can't help thinking that dorne, which was founded by the andals before integrating the rhoynar diaspora in a way that changed their culture for good, doesn't fit well with a country that has its own long history and only really associated directly with europe after colonization.

therefore i would like to submit an alternative that:

had a history of christianity before the founding of islam

is on the border of europe and western asia

whether its in europe or not is actually extremely debated

still has a history of unique spices, textiles, and foods

was and is a cultural melting pot

is in eurovision

I think dorne should be turkey. in this essay i will—

[thickness-protection-program]

According to fox entertainment this is who we should be afraid of. I didn't know who Francesca Hong was 10 minutes ago but thankfully now I'm aware of this monster and her monsterous policies

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

how it feels to message a friend who's having Problems that you can't do anything to help with.

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

#i appreciate how genuine and non-judgemental this comic feels #like left one is not upset at right one for caring while being powerless #and right one seems genuinely distraught and not performative

I'm glad the facial expressions are coming across accurately! It can feel so absurd to say gosh I hope the torment maze removes some fire and rusty nails soon, but alas, sometimes that's all one can do.

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

We need to standardize clothing sizes. This is fucking stupid. Pass a federal law or something. I’m sick of this shit.

[depsidase]

[deadgodjess]

Regular person suspected of shoplifting: followed, harrassed, threatened, killed.

[luxwing]

GAMING NEWS !!

expensive

[luxwing]

[crackedpolishedblackstonebrick]

posts funnier with timestamps on

[hope-for-the-planet]

Ugandan Coffee Growers Shrug Off Drought Thanks to Regenerative Agriculture

Uganda's oldest and largest licensed coffee exporter contributed their in-country expertise to the coalition to establish "model farms."

Due to where it is typically grown, coffee farms are particularly vulnerable to damage from erosion when rain comes either too intensely or too sparsely. A coalition assembled by the Global Environment Facility set up test farms to help provide local coffee farmers in Uganda with the resources to apply regenerative agricultural techniques to their local farming conditions.

The results have led to better yields, healthier soil that is less prone to erosion, and more stable income for farmers.

“But since we applied mulches and planted drought resistant seedlings, the coffee farms are reliably resilient. My coffee is stronger and more promising, and so is my family.”

[hunybody]

gay scott hunter in the brooklyn art gallery: they’re going to kill me for talking to another man

shane hollander in his fortress of isolation: nobody will shoot me with a gun for being gay in my canadian mansion, because they can’t, because i am off the grid

ilya rozanov [thick russian accent]: i am going to live forever and never die and if i die who gives a fuck theyre pussies for killing me honestly

kip: grady

[every-lemon]

so my spouse is part of a weirdly intense but mostly benign men’s workout group that meets at like, 5:30am outside every day, even in winter. they do a lot of burpees and lugging cinder blocks up hills and stuff.

they take turns leading the workouts and tomorrow is his turn. I asked what he was planning. he handed me a sheet of William Carlos William poems from a large stack he’d printed.

I said “what” and he explained, helpfully, “it’s a William Carlos William themed workout.” I asked what inspired it and he said “I’ve been planning this for months.”

[every-lemon]

it was a smash hit.

a dozen guys showed up (more than usual). spouse brought a red wheelbarrow and they took turns bringing cinder blocks up the hill with it. then they broke up in teams and did a relay with an "icebox" (cooler filled with 40lbs of ice). at the end he opened the cooler to reveal it was full of beach plum lacroix and all the guys cheered. they drank sparkling water as he read 'approach of winter' out loud.

he was home by 6:30am.

[wintercorrybriea2]

Chase infiniti at tribeca festival

[dark-elf-writes]

I’m going to be so serious when I say that listening to fans is sometimes the worst thing a company can do.

[wtf-is-hockey]

God sometimes I'm writing smut and I'll like, delete a sentence because I'm like, no, I can't write that. It's too indulgent. And then it's like. Girl, what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins. Get real.

[pseudospaceship]

"what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins" is honestly the thing I needed to hear today

[wtf-is-hockey]

God sometimes I'm writing smut and I'll like, delete a sentence because I'm like, no, I can't write that. It's too indulgent. And then it's like. Girl, what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins. Get real.

[pseudospaceship]

"what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins" is honestly the thing I needed to hear today

[cipheramnesia]

I need a polite way to email multiple people in a business environment that says, "Are you having an AI chat write your email replies? Because these are incoherent sentences and if it's a chatbot, I need you to stop."

[cipheramnesia]

I'm not trying to accuse anyone of communicating like an angry toddler with zero sense of object permanence, but I have received an awful lot of communications which ask for help with "it" while not specifying what "it" is, or asking me to send something while telling me they have it in the same sentence.

[cipheramnesia]

some mixed signals

[theprofessional-amateur]

I have a growing desire to return emails like teacher feedback on an assignment

"Thesis unclear and supporting arguments contradict leaving reader confused."

and in one particularly memorable and annoying case "You email lacks even one complete sentence or verb. Your audience is forced to wildly speculate what you are asking or proposing."

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

"Please send me the prompt you put into ChatGPT to generate this email so I can work out what you're actually asking"