Victoria Lebsack

|  I made such a mess of my life that it turned into art  |

[scatteredrevelations]

“I want to be afraid of the clothes being too big, not too small.”

— 07 / 02 / 2019 || victoria lebsack

[scatteredrevelations]

Repost.

[scatteredrevelations]

Am I the only one who feels like they’re stuck in some washing machine… Going around and around again on the same horrible cycle of existing?

01 / 09 / 2020

[scatteredrevelations]

My happiness plays a stellar game of hide-and-seek

I can’t find it anywhere.

[scatteredrevelations]

This emptiness fills me.

ironic, I know  ||  victoria lebsack

[scatteredrevelations]

07 / 26 / 2019

He grazes my lines my creases my traces of age and tells me that each line is a laugh a cry a memory admiring each new appearance as if he’s watching his  favorite memories play back through my skin. ___ victoria lebsack 9:43 a.m.

[scatteredrevelations]

I want to be afraid of the clothes being too big, not too small.

07 / 02 / 2019 || victoria lebsack

[scatteredrevelations]

I’ve lost so much weight that I’m unhealthy, but I still feel fat. __  07 / 01 / 2019

[scatteredrevelations]

How does one break free from this eternal cycle of misery?

06 / 24 / 2019  

[scatteredrevelations]

you shouldn’t be surprised when people come and go as they please if you refuse to lock the door when they leave

05 / 29 / 2019

[scatteredrevelations]

Addiction

It's my best friend, and my nightmare- it's all that I love and everything I fear. It's my fulfillment, my bottomless sorrow- bringing dark thoughts of no tomorrow. It's my strength, my greatest plight- this evil addiction I try to fight. It's my oblivion, my heartbreaking pain- a toxic cloud that's killing my brain. It's my protection, my paranoid lies- the Devil himself in a simple disguise. It's my sanity, my endless strife- this ecstasy, coke, lsd.. destroying my life. It's my reality, my make-believe bliss- I just never imagined I would end up like this.... __ Victoria Lebsack 05 / 26 / 2019

[scatteredrevelations]

is everyone else standing in line, to be a size zero at the same time?

___

2 - 17 - 2019

[scatteredrevelations]

“They always said our love would go up in flames, but they forgot to mention that I’d be the one left with all the burns.”

-VL

[scatteredrevelations]

“You should have cut deeper, swallowed more pills, hung the rope higher, or something ... because being dead is better than feeling hopeless, unlovable, unwanted, and alone.”

[scatteredrevelations]

I miss you, me, and everything in between.

[scatteredrevelations]

It’s not because I refuse to let go

of the past

rather,

it’s because the past refuses

to let go of me.

[scatteredrevelations]

I don’t really know why I want to die, but then again I don’t know why I want to live either.

[scatteredrevelations]

“It wasn’t that you ripped the wings right off my back, but you plucked off just enough feathers to keep me from flying again.”