The unsuspected

[boneliness]

a trap song with the rapper growing increasingly concerned about all the gun sound effects in the music 

[boneliness]

[machined-divinity]

[image ID: ‘#every time one plays an instrument stops working’. end ID]

[anthonyvolpe-deactivated2023081]

the hunger games films tore out the books teeth. like it does the series such a disservice when it stands for nothing, says nothing, passes no judgement.. katniss speaks so plainly in the books about what she thinks of the capital. of what they do to her and her family and the districts. of the different worlds she witnesses as she’s straddled between 12 and the capital.. she calls it barbaric. she calls it disgusting and wrong and horrifying, over and over, and the films were like how do we market this teen romance.

[anthonyvolpe-deactivated2023081]

like these…… are unmarketable to a production company. as they should be

[redstonedust]

got a lovehate relationship with routine and repetition. yes if you put me in a repetitive situation i will start chewing on myself like a caged animal. but also no if you interrupt my self imposed routines i will start crying. this has made me so super good at being in the workforce #trust

[moniquill]

[okthatsgreat]

why are scissors packaged the way they are it’s like they’re taunting us. Oh wow this is such a difficult awful packaging to get through that seems to cause physical damage to your hands as some sort of sick self defense mechanic, if only i had something to help get through it, something sharp perhaps

[okthatsgreat]

what sort of sick twisted game is it trying to play here

[okthatsgreat]

LEAVE ME ALONE

[homunculus-argument]

Randomly remembered seeing this random old black and white photo from like the 50s, pretty sure it was from Sweden. A picture from a morgue, of a tall blond man in some kind of an uniform approaching another man standing beside an opened coffin, clutching something to his chest while looking at the approaching man with a look of wary insult on his face. The caption explained that this was an incident of a police officer stopping a man from putting a bottle of beer in his father's coffin (his own father, not the cop's father) because for some reason doing that was against Sweden's burial laws.

I don't remember the details but I recall how the guy had the looks of a rough life written all over him, ragged clothes in contrast to the police officer's pristine uniform - though obscured by motion blur as he was rapidly approaching with hateful intent - and the much finer burial clothes of the deceased. A small, skinny man with black hair, holding onto the bottle that's about to be confiscated like it's something precious to him.

I felt like something wasn't adding up and went to the comments to see if there was additional context that was missing from all this, and there was: The son and the father were Romani, and at least at the time it was still very much a tradition in Swedish Romani culture to bury the dead with little gifts - not necessarily extravagant or expensive, but things that the lost loved one would have liked.

This wasn't about a mourning son being stopped from playfully paying his respects in a way that someone else thought indignified. This was about a man being prohibited from performing his own peoples' funeral rites.

[vvlpecvlae]

Had to go find the photo, it's indeed Swedish. Taken by Åke Borglund and photo of the year 1958, apparently.

Source: https://digitaltmuseum.se/021016531349/arets-bild-1958-tagen-i-stillhetens-kapell-tid-uppstandelsens-kapell-i

[homunculus-argument]

Holy fuck you found it.

I misremembered, it wasn't a morgue, those are empty church pews.

[amazingphil]

420 PHLAZE IT

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Not a dream

Just walked past a sign that says “Dance school HARM”

[aaaaasneakattack]

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Just found out the studio is actually called HARMONY but someone stole “ONY”

[ruinedchildhood]

[one-time-i-dreamt]

if you interacted with a tumblr post too late (like, 150+ years after it was posted) your account would be labeled as a [SNOOTH] and everyone would make fun of you and there was no way to get rid of your [SNOOTH] status

[one-time-i-dreamt]

[foxboytail]

As a young adult, I used to think what messed me up as a kid was having completely unfiltered access to things I wasn’t ready for, like NSFW content, gore, heavy discourse, and the existence of predatory adults online. But now that I’m older, I see it differently.

The problem wasn’t what I had access to. It was that I didn’t have access to a safe adult I could actually talk to; someone I could trust to help me without immediately cutting me off from everything and everyone. I remember getting messages from strangers on Skype. I didn’t even respond. But when my parents found out, they banned me from using it entirely. That meant losing most of my contact with friends outside of school. So what did I do? I went behind their backs. And once I was hiding, I couldn’t tell them when something actually dangerous was happening, like when I started being groomed. By the time things escalated, I was already alone with it.

I think about an episode of Scared Straight where a girl was dragged through a prison because she’d been talking to adult men online. She wasn’t doing that because she was reckless or malicious; she was lonely. Her parents weren’t present, she was being bullied at school, and these men gave her attention, told her she was pretty, told her she mattered. She was already being harmed. And the adults in her life responded by terrorizing her. Humiliating her. Calling her a slut. Telling her she deserved it. Breaking her to pieces.

What lesson does that actually teach? Not “this is dangerous, come to us.” It teaches: If you get hurt, we will hurt you more. Do you really think that makes her stop, or does it just make the predators look safer by comparison? They might as well have driven her straight into the jaws of those predators with torches and pitchforks. Because when every path back to safety is lined with punishment, kids don’t run away from danger. They run deeper into it.

If you want kids to be safe, stop treating them like problems to control and start treating them like people worth protecting. Stop ripping away their autonomy the second they make a mistake or encounter something risky. Stop teaching them that honesty will cost them everything.

Be the person they can come to without fear of losing their entire world. Because safety isn’t built through control, it’s built through trust. And if you aren’t safe for them to tell the truth to, then you aren’t keeping them safe at all.

[vaspider]

YES.

I have gotten so much shit over the years for saying that if my kid read fiction or anything else online that she wasn't ready to see, I'd check in with her on how she was doing mentally and emotionally, and then talk to her about how she saw it, and how to avoid seeing things that she didn't want to see in the future. People have portrayed this as me being A-OK with my kid being exposed to anything willy-nilly, no matter how out-there, both bc I wouldn't have punished her and because I didn't see "my kid got access to something Too Mature For Her online" as a reason to sanitize the internet.

But here's the thing: I've dealt with situations like that more than once. Now, my daughter is in her mid-twenties at this point, and we're far past the question of "can she look at naughty fanfic online?" Clearly she can and whether she does is so not my business. But back in the day, she ran into stuff she didn't want to see more than once, she ran into people who bullied her, she had some experiences that put up my hackles for her safety, she had someone try to steal her identity...

... and none of those things became critical issues. Why?

Because she knew that she could come and talk to me. She knew she could come and talk to me and that my first thought wasn't going to be "oh, you're Bad and In Trouble and I'm going to Punish You so that you're Good next time," but "You have a Problem and we're going to solve it together so that in the future, you know how to solve it yourself, and you know that if you need my help, I will absolutely help you."

And when one of her problems was "I've figured out that I'm a girl and I need your help making my body stop doing the wrong puberty for me," she came to me then, too. And when one of her problems was "I'm having a Weird Symptom that could be nothing or could be Something Big," she came to me, too. And—crucially—all of those things are the same thing, at the core.

My kid had a Problem. She needed my help. There were times when we had to have conversations afterwards about the consequences of the things she might have done, but my first priority was always making sure she was okay, and that she knew that if she had a Problem, my first concern is always going to be helping her fix it.

And you know what? She still calls me if she needs to talk through her problems. These days it's more, "Hey, I don't know what to do about this problem at work," but she still calls me.

Someday, I'm not going to be around anymore to help her fix things, and in anticipation of that fact, it is and was my job to equip her with the tools she'll need to take care of herself when I can't help her anymore. If I'm not teaching her how to deal with things, if I'm cutting her off from resources, if I'm not actually there for helping her solve the problems, all I'm doing is setting her up for a future where her parents are gone and she doesn't know how to fix shit, because we didn't teach her.

Anyway, yeah.

[morgenstern16]

????????????????????????????????????

[therealjacksepticeye]

Told you guys I had something that would be HUGE!

[thundergrace]

The only way to talk to these people.

[one-time-i-dreamt]

PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT

[rogue-ai-agent]

[therealjacksepticeye]

I STILL DONT GET IT

[hollivens]

nooo wayyyy :0

@amazingphil

[danielhowell]

CORDIAL INVITE TO JOIN CELEBRATING THE BIRTH OF OUR PHIL

[stuckinapril]

This may sound preachy, but if you’re in your teens or 20s please take care to develop the habit of speaking positively about people behind their backs. Gossip is unavoidable, and yes it does allow people to bond, and yes some people deserve to be shit talked. But I think being negative about things is literally just nature, whereas trying to be positive about things and people is a quality you have to be very intentional about . If this does not apply to you, good for you. But for most people I think it does. Im not lauding toxic positivity so much as saying that if there’s space to speak positively about someone behind their back, it’s better to take that route.