What The Hell Am I Doing

Amber, 29. She/they. Bi and just trying to survive. Dean Winchester, House MD and Heated Rivalry ruined my life. I’m here for the goofs.

[slaygentford]

the part that kills me so much too is that when Shane is high as fuck pitching the cottage one of his talking points is it would be so fun. he literally says it would be so fun. high as fuck and the main thought that filtered through was I wanna kick around a soccer ball in the backyard with you. will you kick around a soccer ball in the backyard with me?

[grabmyboner]

i lied im not sleeping im thinking about sugar daddy shane buying a $250,000 watch for ilya and ilya wearing it everyday and then they’re getting ready in the locker room for practice and someone whistles super loud and is like “damn cap, you spent my entire salary on that watch or what” and ilya takes it off gently and places it in his duffle and looks up at all the boys looking at him “no, shane bought it for me.” and then everyone is hootin and hollering and shane walks in from the physio room smiling at the antics asking everyone what’s going on and someone is like “roz just told us you’re his sugar daddy.” and shane rolls his eyes and starts getting his skates out “so i like buying pretty things for my pretty husband, sue me.” and ilya is like “you think i am pretty?” and shane frowns cutely “of course baby.” and then the entire locker room starts gagging and someone yells out GAAAY and then ilya is like “i will show you gay! Shane take off your pants.” And then shane throws a sock at him. anyways they fuck after practice and shane calls Ilya his pretty boy when he rides him.

[livedinthecastle]

dean absolutely smashing up that car in frustration was fun but if sam got to get real angry and bitchy and key that shit out of spite just once it would've been hilarious

[livedinthecastle]

@soupernatural love the vision

[probablily]

also its important to me that shane Knew he was gay the whole time, it was this Thing itches in the back of his brain, something he couldn't look at head on or really think about. bc admitting it was like giving up. but its not that he didn't Know. shane hollander didn't have to have rose tell him hes gay for him to be like "oh huh really i hadn't noticed" bc he Knew. and you can see it so clearly on his face in that scene how he knew. how thinking about it scares him, how Really looking at this part of himself feels impossible. but again shanes not just completely unselfaware, he knows this about himself he just Hopes he can make it work. that it doesnt really matter. he likes rose Enough, he likes girls Enough, it can be Enough

[sanrio-stud]

there should be coming of age stories for people turning 30

[sundae-meringue]

I'm gratitudemaxxing rn. I love my comfy bed and chocolate chip cookies and my weird gay friends and blorbo from my shows. I love libraries and parks and movie theaters and restaurants and festivals. I love bubble tea and hip hop and honeysuckle. I love everyone who's reading this.

[thirstkanaphan]

[knownqueerbaiter]

ilya trying to show david hollander a meme on his phone, david having to physically take the phone to hold it 2 feet from his face looking at it over his glasses, staring at it for 15 solid seconds reading it aloud under his breath, and then politely asking ilya “you know this person?”

[ceruleanheaven]

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

[dailyhollanovgifs]

INSANE actually!!!

[deancasdenver]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH

[fuckrozanov]

FIHMF!!!!!!!!

[eclogues]

i havent done anything or been anyone ever

[vrtualdreamgirl]

we can’t talk here contact me in my dream tonight

[animentality]

[24x81]

ilya: do you like girls

shane, still leaking lube and cum out of his asshole: is this a trick question.

[cuunos]

*takes a bite of my cigarette*...... heh. the character...... *walks into a small puddle but it swallows me up like the ocean* *i am found dead years later in maine*