if i look back, i am lost
Today's Document
tannertan36
trying on a metaphor
Janaina Medeiros
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
oozey mess
tumblr dot com
Jules of Nature
$LAYYYTER
styofa doing anything
pixel skylines
Discoholic 🪩
occasionally subtle
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
sheepfilms
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
cherry valley forever
Andulka
dirt enthusiast
seen from Argentina
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from Albania
seen from Morocco
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Bangladesh
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from United States
@serious-cutie
If you want to donate somewhere to help out people in Ukraine but are unsure which charities are legitimate, both Charity Navigator and NPR have lists of vetted charities. Links below:
Charity Navigator
NPR
I personally donated to the CARE Ukraine Crisis Fund which provides immediate aid and recovery, food, water, hygiene kits, psychosocial support, and cash assistance, primarily for women, girls, families, and elderly people.
My experiences with Godenteredmybody/Gib
Hey, Pirate Flavor here.
If you don’t already know, Godenteredmybody aka Gib, the previous face of the weirdcore community (owning the og server before its deletion, subreddit, and involvement with all community-based affairs), was called out for harboring inappropriate behavior towards minors by several past mods, including me. Understandably this has yielded mixed reactions, as Gib was a highly trusted and looked upon member of the community.
However there is still more extent to what has occurred, and for the first time I am bringing my experiences to light. I apologize in advance for this post being lengthy, but I want to provide as much information as I can. If you haven’t already, please read the callout post chain I linked above as it adds context to everything.
Before I begin, let me make a psa: I am not saying that Gib groomed me. I am pointing out a lot of his actions toward me as well as many other people were very questionable on several occasions and were blown off by his way of normalization.
——————
Tw // mentions of grooming/encouraged nsfw behavior, minors being exposed to nsfw content, mentions of sexually explicit behavior, and general discussion of very uncomfortable situations.
As a server elite
I met Gib when I was 16-17, and within a few months we became close friends. In the coming months Gib took a liking to me, conversing a lot and even promoting me to mod status. This is where the timeline begins, as Gib held me in special regard. He did in fact, state this on at least one occasion, alongside allowing me special privileges with other people in his circle (almost exclusively other mods whom were christened by him).
I was also never reprimanded or criticized for anything by him. I used to have a habit of making vulgar jokes to the point of purposefully getting a server wide reaction, and Gib would constantly shrug it off despite. I did notice this before and asked if what I was doing was okay, to which I’d usually get a “you’re fine” from Gib.
Art and character content
This next part’s gonna have a lot.
Around April 2021, I showcased one of my characters to the server. [For anyone not in the server and/or not familiar, a demon man with a round red/white face (different character from my Tumblr mascot)]. Gib immediately took interest in him, and soon he became a regular presence in the server alongside other people’s ocs. While I did like the attention, eventually Gib became significantly attached to my character. Throughout the rest of 2021-2022, Gib constantly drew images of him unprompted. For perspective, I have a folder dedicated to this oc on my phone, and over 70 images were drawn by Gib. Keep in mind this is only ones I had saved.
I didn’t mind, as I do have comfort characters of my own, but there were several patterns that leave me feeling it wasn’t fully innocent interest. For one, Gib had a habit of drawing my character topless. When I once asked him, he said that it was “gender envy” (this was prior to his transitioning). While I could understand that sentiment, I do not think someone would draw another person’s oc half-naked several times for that reason alone, especially without asking. Alongside that, Gib did draw him in situations that were contextually explicit. Examples include him stomping on another server character’s genitals, one of Gib’s characters touching his chest lewdly while he was visibly uncomfortable, and him stuck in a jar. At one point he also made a channel called ‘demon s*x roleplay’ and immediately deleted it.
The two biggest things to point out here are that this began prior to me turning 18, and Gib never reached out for my consent doing any of this.
The part that makes me uncomfortable about this is Gib’s history. Being an artist in both the wc server and the private one, he did post a lot of art and would even do some for other server members. The problem with that is that he was fine with being overtly nsfw. He had a tendency to post suggestive drawings and even full nsfw cropped/censored as a joke, all in the presence of minors. (In some cases it was fully uncensored in group drawing streams.) Once he toured his sketchbook live and refused to show several pages implying they were explicit. By his standards, these must have been considerably inappropriate.
[Based on this, and his obsession with my character… what’s to say there’s isn’t legitimate porn drawn of my oc behind my back that was just never made public? I certainly hope there isn’t, because I trusted Gib enough to not do that.]
Now I don’t want to sound like a prude. I do enjoy mature humor and I have nothing against porn as an adult. I can’t stress this enough — drawing porn for “funnies” still makes it porn. Regardless of context, you shouldn’t be exposing it to minors at all. Again, everything that happened I’ve mentioned above was before I was 18. And in the original weirdcore server there were members as young as 13.
Getting under the surface
I’ve mentioned that I was close to Gib, and that is notable in my case. I have prominent trust issues that make it difficult for me to completely lower my guard around others. But I was practically an open book with Gib. He made himself trustworthy enough that around him, I allowed myself to be vulnerable to the point he knew deeper aspects of myself. He knew most of my secrets, personal struggles, and even intimate desires. He was supportive and accepting far more than anyone I’d ever known, so I had no reason to feel like I had to hide anything.
But most importantly about this: Gib knew that I was a victim of grooming and was still actively recovering from it. Through the same time period when I became part of the weirdcore community, elsewhere I was sexually harassed and manipulated/conditioned as a minor. This happened twice under different circumstances, and I ended up processing this in front of Gib and the other members of the private gc. I didn’t have trusted people to turn to outside of my friends who were willing to talk, so there were voice calls where discussion happened.
I don’t want to make this out like Gib meant to be malicious, but he easily had all the pieces in place to take advantage of me if so desired. Especially with his habit of normalizing behavior.
Aftermath
I’m not gonna spend a lot of time into writing this part because I don’t want to conflate my personal feelings unnecessarily.
The surfacing of everything Gib did hit me hard. At first I had thought it was a major misunderstanding when I saw @americanhouses’s post for the first time, but the reblog from @puredragonn is when the realization hit. It really felt like a serious betrayal, and I know I’m not the only one. I loved and trusted him as a friend, I was literally still talking to him up until the day of.
I ended up vomiting two days in to the callout, and was in a really low state for the rest of the month combined with other shit in my life. I’m doing better than I was at least, but my mood still gets dampened thinking about Gib.
I’ve been talking with Dragonn about everything, and she’s been really nice to communicate with. We’ve shared similar experiences with Gib so it’s helped me process some. I wanna thank her for cementing my courage to get this all out here.
——————
If anyone has any questions about anything regarding this situation, my asks are open. Just please be respectful and know boundaries, that’s all I’m asking.
And Gib, if by chance you’re reading this… know that I haven’t forgotten all the memories we shared throughout Weirdcord, but I’m not going to see you in the same light I used to. I hope you consider your actions, do some serious soul-searching, and turn out better in the end.
Let’s talk infections. I have seen many posts asking about infected cuts and i currently have a couple. I have had many infected cuts/scratches and had some treated by a doctor. Every infected cut should be seen by a doctor but if you cant see one there are some things that you can do at home to prevent further infection. Please repost to help others.
Preventing Infections in New Wounds:
-Use sterile supplies/clean with rubbing alcohol
-Wash cut with warm water
-Apply antiseptic cream
-Keep the wound dry with a clean dressing on it (gauze, bandaid, etc.)
-Avoid picking at the scabs
Signs of an Infected Wound:
-Edges of wound are red
-Wound is hot to touch
-Fever
-Oozing pus
-Swelling
-Worsening pain
Treating an Infected Wound at Home:
-Clean the wound 3x a day
-Apply triple antibiotic cream 3x per day after cleaning the wound
-Apply a clean dressing and change it often
-Keep the wound dry
-Let the wound heal without disruptions (don’t pick off the scab, don’t reopen the cut, don’t make new wounds)
BEWARE: The wound will probably take longer to heal than your normal wounds. Making a new wound with an active infection can cause the infection to spread, making it worse/possibly life threatening.
When to see a Doctor:
-Large cut
-Fever
-Redness starts to spread
-Oozing pus
-Aches and pains
-General sick feeling/fatigue
The world is always too bright, too loud, too busy, too fast.
Turkey-Syria Earthquake Resources
https://www.savethechildren.org/us/what-we-do/emergency-response/turkey-syria-earthquake
https://www.unicef.org/emergencies/Syria-Turkiye-earthquake
100% TRUE
Pro tip: If you copy and paste a link that said “no free articles” into a private/incognito browser, it will let you read the whole thing.
also if u press the “esc” (escape) key on ur laptop before the page fully loads, it won’t load any pop-ups blocking u from reading. if the article has images, then this method sometimes does not u see them. but! the words will be fine :)
If the site is particularly badly designed, you might just be able to delete the overlay itself. Right click > Inspect element and delete the line of HTML (it’ll be highlighted automatically)
hey kids there is a website called outline.com that will let you read from pretty much any news site with a paywall for free
outline.com is amazing - it hasn’t failed yet on any site that I’ve tried it on.
There’s a chrome extension and firefox extension.
The point isnt that there are workarounds for non-free news sites, the point being that if you have to jump through hoops to get the news, people are going to where they dont have to jump through hoops.
@yourcousinvinnie Hello! Basically, the quote is about the way in which colonisers think that the people they're colonising or have colonised have no language. Veronelli, the author of the quote, further explains this as lack of expressivity according to a Eurocentrically framed history of the world. Basically the colonizer is incapable of imagining the colonised as having a language or the ability of expressing themself the way the coloniser does.
The picture: This is a photo of Bad Bunny at this year’s Grammy Awards. Bad Bunny’s native language is Spanish as he’s from Puerto Rico, which is an USAmerican colony.
Honestly, this shit with Hogwarts Legacy is just like what happened with Chick-fil-A like ten or fifteen years ago. Some of y'all might be too young to remember it, but it went almost exactly like this shit today, only the target was technically gay people (not like we aren't all lumped together when push comes to shove, but gay was the political scapegoat in US politics at the time, as trans people were still on the fringes of social awareness).
It came out that the people who own Chick-fil-A were donating to organizations in other countries that were actively working to get gay people there killed, and were also very monetarily invested in stripping gay people of any legal rights they'd amassed in the US. So a lot of queer folks were asking for allies to boycott Chick-fil-A to show solidarity.
And it turned into a giant fuckin circus for bigots to rally around. There was even a support Chick-fil-A day, I remember it because I was a server at the time and our restaurant was empty most the day - while the line for Chick-fil-A down the road was like a mile long consistently.
But while that was obviously annoying, that wasn't what hit people the hardest. Cuz we expect clowns to wear the shoes, right, it's not shocking.
What disappointed people, or really demoralized a lot of young queers at the time especially, was the allies who would still go there. Because they like the sandwiches or fries or whatever. The people who'd march with them in the parade or be supportive of marriage equality, who would then turn right around and give their money to people who were trying to actively harm their friends.
Because the chicken was good.
I remember a friend of mine being really just absolutely broken up over that, trying to understand some of her friends reasoning and at the time I couldn't give her an answer. I could now, though.
And it's this:
Talk is cheap.
It costs nothing to say things. A person can say whatever the hell they want, any feel good flowery thing, and it doesn't really cost them.
But when they are asked to actually give something up - or put their money where their mouth is and just....can't do it. Well then there isn't much else for them to say, is there? At least nothing that's worth anything.
Some people had to find out the hard way that the choice between a chicken sandwich and funding people who did not believe in their dignity as a human being was, in the eyes of certain allies, apparently really hard. Too hard, in fact.
These allies would march in the colorful parades and go to the bars for drinks, but in the end, you couldn't actually depend on them to inconvenience themselves. They were fair weather allies, and they were there for the party and that's about it . They wanted entertainment, and it didn't matter if that came from having fun gay friends or a tasty sandwich.
This is the same thing, really, or pretty close to it.
These types of people just wanna have fun. Either you, their friend or whatever, are fun or the game is fun, and if you stop being fun by incidentally making them feel a little guilty about where they spend their money , then they might just choose the thing that doesn't make them currently uncomfortable.
And I'm not saying these people who say trans rights online but who also really, really want to play wizard game and already have are horrible people or anything - they're just not very good. They have no real character. And unfortunately there's not much you can do to change that, other than investing time and energy in people who do.
Because my comics have gone around the internet, many people have asked if I’ve “gotten better yet”. The answer is a firm NO because that’s not how post-viral illness triggered by an infection that causes organ and brain damage works. Please consider your behavior and who you are leaving behind.
Check out the People’s CDC here where they provide weekly updates on the COVID situation in the U.S.
ID in alt text and below!
ID: a 10-image black-and-white cartoony comic.
The 1st image is titled Pandemic Year 3 and dated January 2023. The drawing shows a masked boy with fluffy hair, Joey, surrounded by unmasked people. The text reads: At some point, the people around me decided that the price of me staying alive — a few small inconveniences for them — was too high. In image 2, Joey sits at a table with his drawing tablet looking concerned. The text reads: The world, many loved ones included, is actively hostile to me continuing to live. How do I cope with that? I don’t have the answer. I’m just really alone.
Joey, stressed and frightened, clutches his laptop. The text reads: And I mean really alone. A figure on the laptop screen says: High-risk people will take care of themselves. Joey yells: How?
This image is split into two panels. The first one reads: How do I keep myself safe when the store, work, and school, is a death trap? For each word, a triangle displays that maskless environment. The second panel shows Joey’s sad face in a Zoom window. The text reads: I’m taking my final semester of undergrad online to the displeasure of many.
Joey lays face down in a pillow. The text reads: If you’ve been following me for any time, you know I got Covid in February 2020 at 19 years old and have become disabled by long Covid. Everything smells and tastes like rotting meat, I can’t keep anything I eat down, and I’ve started randomly fainting after years of dizziness.
Joey is shirtless and masked and hooked up to an EKG. The text reads: I’m one of millions of Covid survivors for whom re-infection is much more dangerous. Not to mention everyone who was already high-risk.
Joey lays on the couch and looks at social media posts where people are posting photos of themselves maskless in crowds. The text reads: The general public is very happy to isolate high-risk people from society if it means never having to think about us ever again and continuing with the actions that kill us. That’s eugenics, by the way.
This image is split into two panels. The first one shows Joey laying down, clutching his heart, and crying. The text reads: And it’s not just the people who don’t see us. The second panel shows Joey looking disheveled. The text reads: The cognitive dissonance is unlike anything I’ve seen. A speech bubble says: Are you sure you won’t do indoor dining?
Joey holds his hands lovingly under his face and raises his arms. Hearts are around his head. The text reads: If you’re here with me and isolated from the rest of society while being continually told that your life doesn’t matter and that you’re crazy, I see you. I love you. You’re not alone.
Joey is shirtless and looking down at the portable EKG attached to his chest. The text reads: To the rest of you, I’m here asking for my life. I’m 22 and deserve to not only live but live joyfully. How much death and suffering is acceptable to you? The week of writing this, January 11th through 16th, at least 3,907 Americans have died of COVID. Recorded deaths have been over 2,500 weekly for months. Data from the People’s CDC. Recorded deaths are an undercount as many places stopped collecting or reporting data. End ID.
“Kissing Doesn’t Kill“ (Black and white postcard) from 1980’s ACT UP campaign for HIV/AIDS awareness.
This is the banner that was put up on buses to create awareness! a lot of companies cropped out the bottom so I thought it would be cool to share the full version
Link to the Tyre Nichols Memorial Fund
https://www.gofundme.com/f/tyre-nichols
Become a supporter of Dreampai today! ❤️ Ko-fi lets you support the creators you love with no fees on donations.
I am embarrassed to even ask for help and you all know that in almost 7 years of having this blog, I've never asked for anything, but my university is changing my major from next year on and this is the last chance I have to graduate and take my last semester.
Before the change announcement, due to my current financial situation I planned to take my last semester next year, but if I don't take it now, I will not be able to take it ever again. My only option would be to start all over from the first year on, and the five semesters that I already successfully took and paid off would be worth nothing and I would not be able to finish the course.
I'm a some 1.5k euros away from being able to pay it all off, and I don't have that money right now, even with my paycheck. Both of my dogs have had health issues in the past month and the vet visits wiped us out.
If you can help, please do. I appreciate every contribution. I totally understand if you can't, so please don't feel bad about it. Every reblog and share is appreciated and is very helpful as well.
I'd like to thank everybody who already contributed. You all are amazing and incredibly kind and have helped me beyond words. I'm really speechless at everybody's grace and kindness towards a virtual stranger on the internet like me.
You've all already changed my life for the better these past 6 and a half years. Sometimes I felt so lonely and sad and all of you were my only support systems and I could never thank you enough for that. I love you all, thank you.
Just like to say once more how much I love you all so much and how much you all changed my life for the better, thank you all so much, much love to you all ❤❤❤
Because of all of you, I am a little over 200 euros away from paying off the last of my schooling altogether, including my final term paper and I just can't thank you enough, I love all of you so much, thank you!
Cis™ Person: When am I allowed to misgender a trans person? Can I misgender them when they do something I don't like wrong? No? What if somebody was holding a gun to my head, though? Can I misgender a trans person then? What if they don't look trans? When can I misgender trans people??
One time I pissed off a bunch of Facebook "progressives" in the comment section of a post about Caitlyn Jenner by saying that all of the other comments calling into question whether or not she's really trans were actually super damaging.
People were like "so you're saying you like her?? You approve of her actions???" And I was like ?? No? She's an asshole, I'm just not a fucking transphobe. Thinking someone must be lying about being trans just because they're a shitty person isn't the wonderful trans-positive take y'all seem to think it is.
shirt that says I ♡ Leftist Infighting About Children's Cartoons
how the fuck does this have 10k and nobodys started shit in the notes. congrats guys you are so normal
nightmare surveillance shit aside, this is so fucking funny
PLS HELP BLACK AFRICAN AUTISTIC TRANS MAN PAY OFF DEPOSIT/RENT
Hey, currently looking for help to OFFICIALLY secure my housing by finishing off my deposit as I am now in breach of the lease and at risk of losing my housing.
THE GOAL IS $400!!!
UPDATE (09/02/23): RECEIVED $30 SO FAR. PLS KEEP BOOSTING!
$30/400
ANYTHING HELPS, IM JSUT SEVERELY STRESSED OUT ABOUT MY HOUSING SITUATION AND THIS HAS BEEN GOING ON SINCE OCTOBER LAST YEAR.
PLEASE HELP RELIEVE ME FROM THIS STRESS. $1 GOES A LONG WAY. THANK YOU!
Go to paypal.me/leavemynameoutofit and type in the amount. Since it’s PayPal, it's easy and secure. Don’t have a PayPal account? No worries.
Urgent Please don’t scroll!! It’s black history month..
A black queer women is in need! I’m so behind in rent to the point i’m going to be behind this month coming up as well. I need to raise 1600 by the end of February or I will be homeless. Boost this ! Don’t want to be kicked out in the cold.
236/1600
cashapp: spookycoco19
