dust and gold

[mbrainspaz]

idk what neurodivergent young adult needs to hear this but you are NOT supposed to give 100% at your job. I've gotten more promotions and raises since I started giving 40-60%, which my evil CEO uncle informed me is what bosses actually expect when they say 110%. My mental health has improved tremendously. I've spent 2 out of 5 workdays secretly writing my novel for the last 2 years and I've never been more respected and appreciated. Also--when you see glaring wasteful errors in the company's operating systems, say absolutely nothing! Embrace inefficiency. It is your friend in this capitalist hellscape.

[prokopetz]

Going directly from what the average person I know in real life thinks constitutes kinky sex to what the average person I follow on Tumblr thinks constitutes kinky sex like

[charyou-tree]

Average Neighbor: Kink is when you pretend to hurt each other :(

Average Tumblr Mutual: Look, cannibalism is conventional erotic imagery, that can't be a "hear me out".

[mvtk42]

[noodles-07]

websites often misjudge how far I will go to avoid ads. "you can't use this site until you turn off the adblock sowwy" I Am Leaving Your Website

[thememedaddy]

[caats]

[thememedaddy]

[catchymemes]

[ur-daily-inspiration]

[furnzz]

Two types of people in the comments here

[eunreal]

Me after putting on my mascara

[daily-spooky]

[caats]

[homunculus-argument]

You ever been in a state where you physically have no energy, but you're bored and socially understimulated so you kind of wish you could just invite people to come over like this:

[thememedaddy]

[dragon-in-a-fez]

yesterday I told a friend "drown your sorrows tonight but save one bottle to make a molotov tomorrow" and I'm actually very proud of that. might embroider it on a pillow

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

some of you bitches deserve a nap and a milkshake tbh

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

um maybe stfu and accept that u are lovable and life owes u a bagel

[confused-tapeworm-colony]

I don't like bagels

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

dearest babe the bagel is a metaphor for the baked good of your choice

[eikotheblue]

California girls we're unaccountable

[eikotheblue]

California girls we're unforgivable

[triviallytrue]

unintentional plagiarism of another post! hbomberguy kill their ass

[eikotheblue]

california girls we're unoriginal 😔

[hybridzizi]

You're from Washington.

[eikotheblue]

california girls we're washingtonian

[magicratfingers]

went to throw dog poop away in a rando trash can and

[floralasshat]

Plz tell me you took him home and have a new per gengar.

[magicratfingers]

i'm not qualified to provide adequate enrichment for a trash gengar also I know for a fact he was recently hit in the face with a bag of dog poop

[magicratfingers]

it just started raining this is really doing a number on my object personification

໒( ●ܫฺ ●)ʋ

[magicratfingers]

Jesus fucking Christ

[magicratfingers]

jesus fucking christ

[osvaldvvanstein]

Update please I am begging you

[magicratfingers]

ok but you’re not gonna like it

[magicratfingers]

mid spa break to drain in the sink

[magicratfingers]

sir

please

[magicratfingers]

the family requests that trash gengar's privacy be respected during this difficult time

drying in the sun

[magicratfingers]

[condemnedouthouse]