sorry for being english

😔

[psyduckz]

[tiktoks-i-enjoyed]

[hkdmz]

[donnerpartyofone]

Good M0000000000000000000000000

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[ivy-saurs]

randomly remembered this tweet and had to stop myself from bursting out laughing

[juunipupu]

Knight under Everything

[lamignonette]

[tallspookylady]

teamwork makes the dream work

[cuprohastes]

Shiftshaper

Day 1 of infiltrating the crew.

One of them got too far from the group. Paralysed him and took his form.

Returned to the ship. Everyone keeps asking me where my pants are.

Day 2 of infiltrating the crew.

We have taken off. I have explained that one of the 'native lichens' made me allergic to pants. The rest of the crew seems to accept this.

Day 3 of infiltrating the crew.

I have been helping out around the ship while learning its secrets. And also trying to figure out where my quarters are supposed to be. Got it right fourth time. Managed to talk my way out of three awkward encounters.

Fourth one, not so much. I think I'm dating Crewman Eloise now.

Day 4 of infiltrating the crew.

Brought Eloise some breakfast and used my cunning skills to pump her for information.

So successful that I contrived to bring everyone else breakfast. I am a genius.

Day 5 of infiltrating the crew.

The captain keeps asking for Crewman Vitsie. They are obviously incompetent and lazy and have not responded. Captain sounds very irate. Perhaps I should find Vitsie and eat him to improve crew morale.

Day 6 of infiltrating the crew.

... I'm Crewman Vitsie. Got yelled at by the captain. Grovelled handsomely and explained that I am incompetent and lazy. I think I got away with it.

Day 7 of infiltrating the crew.

Space pirates. Why is it always space pirates?

Replicated one of them, infiltrated the ship, ate their captain. Very greasy.

Swapped back to my Vitsie disguise and pretended I snuck on board and shot the captain.

Luckily nobody asked about why I now weigh 50% more

Day 8 of infiltrating the crew.

Captain mentioned he knew I was a shiftshaper. Now hiding in an airduct. I'm not crying. That's... just... OK I might be crying. Eloise was going to put on a movie and I was really looking forward to it.

Day 9 of infiltrating the crew.

Captain has been yelling into an airvent for the last hour. They say they figured it out immediately.

Turns out Vitsie was an asshole, and they just liked me better.

NGL, feeling kind of proud.

Captain says since I saved the ship from greasy space pirates, they'll call it even if I promise not to eat any more crew.

Asked if that includes Robins from Engineering. Captains says Robins included because he's the only one who knows how to fix the toilets.

This is reasonable.

Day 10 of infiltrating the crew.

Watched "The Thing" with Eloise. Didn't sleep all night. That was terrifying!

[04k96]

[glorious-spoon]

spent forty-five minutes today helping an 87yo woman who does not own a computer or a cell phone try to set up an email account so that she could then set up a second account in order to access benefits. went with protonmail, because they don't require 2fa, but it turns out that while you can still make a protonmail account without authentication you can no longer use it to create OTHER accounts without it, and the benefits page she needed to get to required both an email and a cell phone to create an account anyway. asked if she wanted to try going in person to see if someone there could help her, and she said that she had, and they'd directed her to the website. she tried signing up with her landline, but of course that didn't work because you can't do SMS authentication that way. finally ended up writing up detailed instructions for how to log in and authenticate her account so she can drive to her severely disabled daughter's house forty minutes away because that's the only person she knows and trusts who has both a cell phone and a computer.

anyway i fucking hate mandatory 2fa and i think the people responsible for it should have to spend a year navigating their lives with no cell phone and no internet access beyond the public library pcs. fuck.

[silusvesuius]

karaba 💛 got an anon a day ago asking if i've ever seen this movie and no i haven't.. but now i have... and i had to draw this queen stat

[rainydaydecaf]

I never saw people say stuff like this enough when I was a teenager, so I’m saying it now.

I’m in my mid-thirties and I have never had sex. I’ve thought about it and could have had one or two opportunities if I put in more effort, but I always decided against it because I just wasn’t into it at the time.

I can safely say that I do not feel I have missed out on anything. I was perfectly capable, by myself, of learning about my own body and boundaries without anyone else there to muddy the waters. The immense pressure that was there in my teens/twenties to Have Sex Just Do It is basically gone. I’m vibing. I’ve got my routine by myself in bed that I enjoy, and that’s enough for me.

And in the unlikely event that I ever decide to have sex with someone in the future, I don’t feel at all like I’m lacking some essential Knowledge or Skill that would “make it good” for someone else. I fully expect to ask my partner out loud what they like and to receive an answer clearly communicated and to relax and have fun. And if it’s a disappointing experience, I’m fine with that too. It is what it is.

Sex is just not that big of a deal. I suspected it as a teen, and I’m more sure of it now. It’s fine to have it or not have it. It’s whatever.

[effiecalvin]

I have this idea for a video game called Are You Out There? where two players control two different alien civilizations and the goal of the game is to invent spaceflight and then manage to find one another in a ginormous universe. You can try to leave signs for each other to find, or send out probes and radio waves, or colonize many systems so you're a bigger target, but its hard because the universe is really big.

Idk just a thought.

[not-your-average-url]

I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.

I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.

[kirikomamura]

whenever the conversation about difficulty and accessibility in games come up i want to slam my head into a wall because noone thats speaking has anything more than a surface level understanding of what "difficulty" even is

[kirikomamura]

your game should have accessibility options, but if your only accessibility options are "turn off central game mechanics" then you have made shit accessibility options.

[kirikomamura]

you know what accessibility option doesnt completely fucking butcher your game while allowing almost everyone to play it? an option that is not available in 99.99% of all games ever made? easy:

[kirikomamura]

bonus points: if you put a game speed slider in your game you can also allow Absolute Fucking Freaks to turn it higher than 100%

[ripempezardexerox]