Chiming in because as of late this is something that's been really bothering me.
The big problem is that the people who claim to be the Enlightened Neutral Party in pro/anti discourse:
Have been acquainted with the discourse for no more than three collective minutes, so they have no idea what it's about or what kind of behavior has been surging in frequency in the last decade or so --- and because of that, they are unable to process the real-world ramifications of these talking points becoming popular (parallels to real-world hate groups who push for censorship, for example)
Have been fortunate enough to not be harassed over their ships (or watch someone they care about be harassed) to the extent that others have been, if at all
Assuming we're talking about people who are clueless and not people who are antis who don't want to be loud and proud about it, they have no actual experiences to go off of when it comes to this debate, so to them it's just "online discourse". They believe there are no real-world consequences, being either willfully or unintentionally ignorant of the fact that people do get doxxed and stalked in real life over petty fandom morality bullshit.
No halfway decent person is going to watch somebody beat the tar out of another person, and when the person getting beat finally punches back, try to "both sides" the situation and insist they're both in the wrong because "it's just a stupid fight. Just stop fighting, idiots!" Meanwhile, the person who is getting beaten up on very much agrees! They would LOVE for the fight to stop! But they did not start the fight, and the person who did has no intention of stopping. The victim is blamed for the aggressor's refusal to stop being an aggressor.
Pro-ship and pro-fiction folks also think fandom discourse is fucking stupid! We agree! But as long as antis keep causing issues instead of just blocking shit they don't like, the pro/anti discourse is going to continue.
And again, all of this is caused by the fact that neutrals are either antis who won't admit it, or people who have not seen the full scope of the problem. They try to speak on the subject, trying to sound enlightened and "above it all", despite not knowing anything about it. They do not see, or pretend to not see, people being doxxed over ships. They do not see, or pretend not to see, cases like IAmLunaSol where artists are stalked IN REAL LIFE over fictional characters. They do not see, or pretend not to see, the people who have attempted and/or successfully committed suicide as a result of witch-hunts led by antis ever since the early days of modern fancop activity in the Steven Universe fandom.
TL;DR if you're "neutral", you're either an anti and trying to hide it, or you have no idea what you're talking about and should either take the time to talk to us to learn what's been going on, or you should keep your pseudo-philosophical faux-enlightenment to yourself.