私 wa ドキ when の waifu

☆ 30s ☆ she/they ☆ queer ☆ ☆ Engineer In Training ☆ ☆ cosplayer ☆ fan boi ☆ island girl ☆ Hello, I'm Shizu. I like cute things, art, and food. Here is a blog of mine with cute things, art, and food. And fandom stuff. ☆

[hustlerose]

of course you have blood all over you. and pronouns

[hustlerose]

easy website

[cryptid-on-a-string]

^^^ me when I’m trying to calm down my horse named “Website”

[batcii]

weird horse

[validwarriorcatsnames]

"Websight" is a Valid Warrior Cat Name!

[athelind]

The Most Tumblr Punchline

I've noted before that my favorite punchline on Tumblr is "hang on, gotta look something up/okay that's funny."

Let me explain why:

It is a way to say "I don't get it" without blaming the joke or the teller.

It is a tacit admission of ignorance without shame or judgement.

It assumes responsibility for acquiring the knowledge the respondent doesn't already have.

It cues other people who Don't Get It to do the look-up themselves, allowing them to get that full impact of Getting It without derailing the post with explanations.

It gives subsequent readers, whether or not THEY got the joke, a little frisson of good feelings when they realize that someone else is now In On The Joke.

It not only makes the original joke funnier, it gets funnier the more often it's used.

[embervoices]

This, and You Are One Of Today's Lucky 10,000 are very much things I love about Tumblr culture, yes!

[ricetrippycreeps]

[gentlemanbones]

READER BEWEADER YOU’RE IN FOR A SCEADER

[dozydawn]

nimble, a border collie-papillon mix, wins the 12” class in the 2024 masters agility championship. the first time a mixed breed has won at westminster ever.

[ch40s0w1]

context explaining why the announcer is screaming, this is supposed to take a high level competitive agility dog 40 seconds

[sandersstudies]

This video makes me cry every time it’s on my dash and I can’t even iterate why.

Like the dog doesn’t even know it’s a competition and she’s made history. She(?) just is happy and knows she made her owner happy too.

[solely-ashes]

The face of a being with only a wind storm between their ears, moments before unleashing it unto the world

[severeprincesheep]

always a pleasure to see this girl on my dashboard

[reunitedinterlude]

the punchline to the editing tips saga <3

bonus:

[kaijuno]

[tsunderebird]

[willemdaflutist]

[stuckinapril]

Very true

[desultory-suggestions]

I told someone today that they are important. It broke my heart when they told me "no one has ever told me I am important before." If no one has told you, you are important. You specifically, are important. Your existence matters. Your life matters. You are important.

[homophobla]

Twice a year in Hawaii the sun passes directly overhead and objects cast no shadow. It’s a phenomenon called “Lahaina Noon”

[phoenix-theurge]

You're full of shit, Hawaiians are just able to levitate coconut milk.

[dirty-noona]

As a Native Hawaiian, 1) I thought this happened everywhere, 2) ofc we can levitate coconut milk

[shizukablogs]

wait wait I can't believe this doesn't happen everywhere else wtf do you mean people don't levitate their coconut milk how else do they pour it out???

[queer-as-city-folk]

I think the funniest thing that could happen in American Politics would be for trump to die on election day 2028

[lightweightkate]

I’ve been cackling about this for like five minutes now

[uncharacter-istically]

[Video caption:

O-okay, let’s get into this, shall we?

*grumbling* Would you rather work for Lex Luthor or the Joker- *shouting* Lex Luthor, by like, a fucking mile!

Yes, yes, working for Lex Luthor is basically like being an Amazon employee that makes weapons of mass destruction, which is bad. Lex is like Donald Trump mixed with Mark Zuckerberg mixed with Jeffrey fucking Bezos, it’s not a great mix. He does not treat his henchmen well. Their lives still suck, and they are probably monitored on how long they take piss breaks for.

But let’s analyze what working for Lex Luthor is like versus the fucking Joker. With Lex you probably get a dental plan, a health plan, a paycheck, and the guy that you’re fighting really cares about human life. Superman will hit you just long enough to knock you out, so you’re not a treat, so he can stop the problem.

If you work for the Joker, your payment is you’re not fucking dead. You say one wrong thing? Bang. You don’t laugh at his jokes? Bang! You do laugh at his jokes? Bang! You think Joker gives a fuck about a henchman?

Who’s Lex Luthor’s right-hand-man? It’s a woman, you sexist, her name is Mercy, she’s awesome. Who’s Joker’s right-hand-man? Bob? Nah, he’s dead. Harley? Tried to kill her multiple times. Slappy? Who the fuck is Slappy?

The best case scenario of working for the Joker is that you fight the fucking Batman! And that presents its own fucking list of problems. If you stop Superman as a Lex Luthor henchman, Lex’ll be pissed, but he’ll be at least happy that Superman was caught. If you stop Batman as a Joker henchman, you better have a fucking coffin picked out yesterday.

This isn’t a fun hypothetical question, this is a screening technique that the doctors at Arkham use to determine your mental health! There is a right and a wrong answer to this question, and the correct one is Lex fucking Luthor. Thank you for coming to my fucking Ted Talk, have a nice day.

End caption.]

[loveitorreblogit]

Bitch neither I work for Wayne Industries, they got better offers than work these clowns:

[gandalfsbignaturals]

batmans secret special attack is offering all of his enemys henchmen a living wage and guaranteed healthcare

[thememedaddy]

[audhdspacewizard]

I'm dating myself but

[beardedmrbean]

[dogpuppy]

[pineberry-princess]

[fruityshirts]

#ranibow sprimkle

[slipping-into-madness]

[thaumbody]

Here's a source for the analysis, but it probably is not the source.

Labor share of income hits record low as corporate profits soar

Workers’ share of US economic output has fallen to its lowest level since the government began keeping records in 1947, according to data th

Some points of interest:

Corporate profits are soaring. After taxes, they now take 12.3 percent of national output, far above their postwar average of 7.3 percent.

Adjusted for inflation, hourly wages have risen 3 percent since the end of 2019, Ip noted. Corporate profits over the same period have risen 50 percent.

The Economic Policy Institute calculates that since 1979 the productivity of American workers has grown 90 percent while the pay of the typical worker has grown 33 percent. Had wages tracked output, the average worker would earn $16.40 more an hour today.

The profits are concentrated among the largest corporations. Earnings at the 500 biggest US firms rose 28 percent in the first quarter from a year earlier, the fastest pace since 2021, and their profit margins reached 14.8 percent. The seven technology giants known as the “Magnificent 7”—Apple, Microsoft, Nvidia, Alphabet, Amazon, Meta and Tesla—grew their profits 63 percent.

In the United States, the richest 1 percent of households hold 31.7 percent of all wealth. The bottom half hold barely 2.5 percent.

[melonwah]

[the-frightening-ghoul]

ㅤ

[mitchipedia]