pati

[shockerzs]

New years restitution: just get it together in general

[shockerzs]

me: why am i not a thousand note selfie kinda guy?

brain: u ugly lol

me: oh, yeah

[shockerzs]

thanks for reminding me what my most listened radio station is Pandora :))) it’s not like I listen to it enough to know :)))))))))

[winterforlovers]

How does a penguin build it's house?

IGLOOS IT TOGETHER.

[shockerzs]

Why don't we talk about the awkward moment when you're in the hallway at school during the pledge of allegiance and you don't know what to do

[shockerzs]

White people things: sending Christmas cards with themselves on it

[shockerzs]

never understood how someone can say I love you and not mean it

[shockerzs]

swimming is the devil’s sport

[shockerzs]

You guys should submit text posts and I'll give you credit for them

[shockerzs]

daily reminder to not be an asshole :)

[shockerzs]

i can’t netflix and chill with you because i would need to explain to my mom that a boy asked me to watch tv with him and it’s not weird and face the conversations that would follow

[shockerzs]

don’t ever think of someone as less than you are because in the end, we’re all just human

[shockerzs]

So today there was a substitute in my band and he's like I have no idea what you do in band and a guy says "we concert band and chill"

[shockerzs]

*hits head*

person:hey is ur head OK?

me: haven’t had any complaints

[shockerzs]

me (while crying): i'm not crying

[shockerzs]

texting someone and getting a “who is this” is sad because they literally went to your contact and clicked delete at one point

[shockerzs]

*friend says something that reminds me of Halloween* 

me: HALLOWEEN HALLOWEEN LAHOOWLEKN HALLEOWNWD HWLOALKJD LEOWWNEEEN HALOWNEEN WHANELEHEN HALOWWEN HALOWEIENRE HALLOWEEN HALOWWEN LOAHOLWEEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!