Simple, Yet Elegant

Nah, I'm just kidding, I'm one clumsy motherfucker. Currently down bad for SVSSS 🥒✈️

[animentality]

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

nosferatu? no. tuferatu. no es mi problema.

[quorpiest]

no mi circo no mis feratus

[dogtoenail]

[serial-unaliver-deactivated2024]

realistic coworker conversation

[natalieironside]

"'I don't know' isn't an answer" alright man then I'll just. Fuckin. Enter my philosophical mind-palace and check the fuckin akashic records. Real quick lemme just catch and cook and eat the Salmon of All Knowledge. Tell me ur question again so I can real quick climb to the highest branches of the Yggdrasil and lay it at the feet of Freda the all-wise Queen of Heaven. Dickhead.

[hydrachea]

> turns on my computer

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> opens my email

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> launches a software

> disables a new AI fea

[mintbees]

steam repeatedly notifying you that a friend is booting up a game thats clearly not cooperating feels like ur sitting inside and someone outside keeps trying to rev up a lawnmower

[mintbees]

[jisuto]

[agnesmontague]

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

[stellarskyes]

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

[agnesmontague]

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

[qi-mera]

More of you need to learn about these ☝️

[jadenebula]

[portaltomb]

this lettuce smells like dog

[iamoutofideas]

you bought dog lettuce

[swarnpert]

[captainsnoop-deactivated2020041]

i hate it when game devs put “fixed several issues” in patch notes 

no. tell me what you fixed. i wanna know what the glitch was.

you know those patch notes that are like “fixed an issue where if the player sat in a bush for too long, they’d become the size of a skyscraper” 

i wanna read those. tell me those. 

[necroesque666]

[sindri42]

[sindri42]

[ahdok]

Adjusted value of Bees. Now that was a special one… because every item in the game had a minimum value, and a beehive was a container for bees, which each had a minimum value… which meant the moment one of your dwarves picked up a beehive, your entire fortress’ net worth skyrocketed… a value used in determining how powerful the foes that visit and try to murder you are.

[prokopetz]

Reblogging for the explanation of what “adjusted value of bees” actually means, because I know several folks following this blog have been wondering.

[probabilitydirigible]

Okay but you’ve all forgotten the best Dwarf Fortress bug of all “Flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy” 

[probabilitydirigible]

Actually I lied it’s the one where after a major update werewolves and vampires started climbing the nearest tree and refusing to come down. It turned out that he’d given evil creatures the ability to sense each other, but forgotten to set a maximum range on it, so werewolves were aware Hell was underground and trying to flee by climbing 

[thepageofhopes]

This has to be my favorite patch note ever

[laterkiss]

happy pride month 🏳️‍🌈

[mattpresents]

How do you know you're not Asexual? Maybe you just haven't met the right nobody.

[crankygay]

[ottermatopoeia]

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

they killed him for this

[beardedmrbean]

[klapollo]

at planned parenthood and they're playing regular show

[klapollo]

[cutecipher]

"dude if you don't get this abortion benson is gonna fire us"