Since When

they/them idk what this will be I just returned to tumblr after like 6 years

[sheherlockholmes]

HAATEEEE hate actually. that overweight is considered a more pc nice term than fat. like i need the word fat to become destigmatized right now because im tired of people talking circles around trying to say chubby or big or plus size as catchalls because fat is a fine word. its fine. i know its been deemed derogatory by our culture but thats because being fat is deemed bad anyways but i think its a better word than calling people overweight like over what weight hm? what weight are you saying they are over. normal?? fuck you

[rowlfthedog]

[despazito]

Sometimes I'll be looking at bullshit online that I know will just rile me up and I have to think of this image to get myself to stop

[ryan-sometimes]

Tumblr I need everyone to log in rn because the most important, quotable, instantly iconic celebrity post of the century just dropped

[ryan-sometimes]

A ship — a magnificent ship — full of gay men. And me.

I am furious, but I am sailing.

[thepanaculty]

And what is the charge?! A ship??? A magnificent ship full of gay men and me?!

[gmbencompetence]

We need to have a nomination for “Stupidest thing Tumblr.com has ever believed” and just move into an official Top 10 List.

For my nominations, I’m putting up:

If you eat a chocolate bar a very specific way, you will break physics and get infinite chocolate.

or

It is impossible that you spelled “Berenstain Bears” wrong and is, instead, more likely that the universe fractured into separate, overlapping realities in the last 20 years.

I can’t decide which is more beautiful. It’s why we need a vote.

[jupiterjunebug]

this is a picture of the human brain at the moment of death. tragic and beautiful

[gmbencompetence]

Fuck. That is a damn good nomination.

[thisisdefinitelyacreativename]

if you close your eyes when the train hits your brain will assume you are dead. Some find this comforting.

[gmbencompetence]

We’re getting into the good ones now. This is some classic Tumblr.

[turtle-powered]

Two old favourites:

“Bitch, That’s the Tubby Custard Machine” (http://imgur.com/gallery/IObQF)

and the horse dildo that was passed off as someone’s arm. (http://abakkus.tumblr.com/post/48958415162)

[gmbencompetence]

This is rapidly becoming a master post of ignorances and I could not possibly be happier.

[analienorsutin]

Rare blue watermelon

[sickofimmortality]

That disease where you get purple eyes, no period, and no body hair

[akiraita]

How have we gone this far without anyone mentioning the bird in the chocolate fountain

[unicornfan]

soap makes water molecules smaller

[elphabaoftheopera]

I nominate the “we are killing the earth” picture of the earth in comparison from 1978 to 2012

[brucebocchi]

the dog with the slice of ham on its face that everyone thought was a gigantic burn scar

[adataraxia]

“Tequila is the only alcohol thats not a depressant so you can drink as much of it as you like”

[softurl]

[sasukehateblog]

that post with the picture of the joker without makeup and people thinking it was a real person and defending him

[painisthecleanser]

that photo of voldemort being passed off as an aborted fetus

[stankyleg-deactivated2918973]

The two way mirror

[rinlockhart]

“listen here, cumslut.”

[tenaflyviper]

I can’t believe you guys forgot someone trying to pass off a picture of the inside of a fig as a microscopic view of the inside of a vagina.

[nyokoko]

I can’t believe I was on Tumblr for every single one of these posts.

[chromaticabrasions]

all the links on this post are broken and some arent given so heres a compilation of links for the stupidest things tumblr has believed (i tried to find the og post for most of these but some of them are posts/articles about said posts)

infinite chocolate hack

berensta/ein bears (mandela effect)

mri scan walking dead gif

train gif brain thinks you died

tubby custard machine

horse dildo

moonmelon (and variations)

alexandria’s genisis

bird chocolate fountain og post

soap shrinks water molecules

we are killing the earth

ham on dog

tequila isnt a depressant

earth is lumpy

joker without makeup

voldemort fetus

two way mirror og post

fig vagina

[carillonghorn]

[brightmouth-deactivated20230417]

My spouse and I just had one of those “wait your brain works HOW?” exchanges, and now I am BURNING TO KNOW HOW IT WORKS FOR OTHER PEOPLE:

Fellow speakers of this feral bastard language (English), rb and tell me in the tags: what is the delineation for you, if any, between evening and night?

[vintar]

there's this one gay porn studio i'm subscribed to email updates for just because i am never prepared for what each email contains

pretentious gay sluts i am very fond of you

[loveridden1999]

problematic sudoku solving skills gap

[featuringmarkhoppus]

[fatpunk]

where is transgender flag "I'M TOO FAT FOR THIS HEAT"

[fatpunk]

FOUND IT

[fatpunk]

it's that time of the year again folks

[animatedtext]

[russianblush]

the passion of the kiss before the i love you vs the relief of being loved in the kiss after

[shamebats]

Heteronormativity just seems like people making up weird arbitrary rules and then getting mad at each other for breaking them and it all looks so miserable to me

[shamebats]

A straight guy told me he's going to therapy to figure out why the idea of having children and being in a monogamous marriage doesn't appeal to him and I was just like idk man that describes like 90% of my friends including me and we're all literally fine but good luck I guess?

[animentality]

[animentality]

[hydrachea]

> turns on my computer

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> opens my email

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> launches a software

> disables a new AI fea

[susiephone]

so frustrating to be a skeptic with a sense of whimsy because like. I want there to be cryptids. I want there to be magic. I want there to be evidence of something we don't fully understand and can't explain. but then 99% of the "proof" out there for that stuff is like. the most obvious scam you've ever seen in your life.

[ckret2]

[crystaltoa]

Magic

Sandra's seen a leprechaun, Eddie touched a troll, Laurie danced with witches once, Charlie found some goblins' gold. Donald heard a mermaid sing, Susy spied an elf, But all the magic I have known I've had to make myself.

-Shel Silverstein

[bromdebus]

Why did Eddie touch the troll

[reagantheteenagewitch]