is it Halloween yet?

Fump | tired med student | she/her | 20s

[theotherendcomics]

[pookapufferfish]

[xoxochb]

I feel like it’s a crime that I haven’t seen this yet

[outofcontextarthur]

[pileofknives]

“​honey i fucking hate our pretentious nerd son”

[icey-pie]

Everyone else go home these are the only takes that matter

[sandersstudies]

Being an actor keeps me sane. Yeah I have to work a day job but know what? When my day job is stressful and I want to scream I get to go hey wait. I have a scream scheduled at 7:30 tonight. Gotta save up. And then I go back to what I was doing.

[sandersstudies]

I have a scream scheduled, I have a kiss scheduled, I have an argument scheduled, I have a making up scheduled, I have a sing and dance scheduled, I have a get slapped in the face scheduled, I have a cry scheduled, whatever. It’s all good.

[sandersstudies]

Something something the Greeks were right about catharsis.

[sandersstudies]

ohhhhhhhhhh my god and when you argue you always have a comeback, and when you make up there’s no lingering anger, and when you scream you don’t have to hold back, and when you get slapped in the face you know you’re safe, and when you cry you know all will be well.

[sandersstudies]

Oh and if it doesn’t turn out and your character dies or something well then you can go to the greenroom and have a snack and that’s good too.

[sandersstudies]

Everyone saying “oh like bdsm” or “oh like larping.” Yes. Humans thrive on imagination and play in many ways.

[cuteautumn]

TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!

[tomatoreddsworld-deactivated201]

WHAT THE FUCK IT’S CHRISTMAS EVE WHY DID SOMEONE REBLOG THIS

[derranger-deactivated20220102]

TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!

[imokube-deactivated20240203]

TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!

[mr-freezo-42069-inactive]

🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃

TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!

🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃

[hallowed-be-thy-ween]

TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

[moonlightsdreaming]

[lastoneout]

like the first rule of cooking is to have fun and be yourself and the first rule of baking is to stay calm because the dough can sense fear

[adobe-outdesign]

the craziest beta 'mon is this guy, who would evolve into a random Pokemon upon evolution

like imagine finding this autism creature fighting for its life out in the wild so you catch it out of pity and two months later it evolves into goddamn Rayquaza

[libraryofjoy]

Lady of shallot. Lady of onion. Lady of garlic. Lady of chives.

[skiptomy]

its 4am and I have no control over what i draw

[elodieunderglass]

You could say the curse had come upon you!

[inkskinned]

please i love you i'm begging you bring back suspension of disbelief bring back trusting the audience like. i cannot handle any more dialogue that sounds like a legal document. "hello, i am here to talk to you about the incident from a few minutes ago, because i feel you might be unwell, and i am invested in your personal wellbeing." "thank you, i am unwell because the incident was hurtful to me due to my childhood, which was bad." I CANT!!!!

do you know how many people are mad that authors use "growled" as a word for "said"? it's just poetics! they do not literally mean "growled," it's just a common replacement for "said with force but in a low tone." it's normal! do you hear me!! help me i love you please let me out of here!!!

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

Watching Home Alone is so funny it’s like

Kevin’s mom: *hyperventilating into a paper bag* I can’t believe I left my son home alone, he has to be so terrified, my poor baby boy all alone I need to go get him-

Kevin: *actively planning to commit war crimes*

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

There are, at every turn, adults trying to help Kevin. He is not trapped in that house, he goes shopping like three times. He convinces the pizza delivery guy that there’s an old guy there trying to murder him. Kevin knows exactly what the fuck he’s doing and what he is doing is psychological warfare

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

Petition to make Home Alone a PG-13 movie at LEAST so the Wet Bandits can call Kevin a little shit on-screen

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

Actually no. Rated R. I want to watch Kevin kill a man

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

It started out as a random burglary but the SECOND Kevin shot that dude in the dick it became personal

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

I just realized that like. Until the end of the movie Kevin never figured out his family straight up forgot him at home. He truly thought he had fucking magicked them away with his wish that night and that he had magic powers. No wonder the kid was so full of hubris with those robbers he had the power of God and Santa on his side

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

Okay movie’s over. I have unironically and genuinely come to the conclusion that Kevin is a child prodigy and will possibly the most intelligent person on the planet once he’s full grown. Not only is he able to outsmart the Wet Bandits (great name), he outmaneuvers the police, shoplifts at least once, and rigs up multiple contraptions including a fake house party, a get-chickened fan+feather combo, and a homemade door-activated flamethrower. He does this all while convincing everybody that he’s just a tiny helpless kid.

In fact, at the beginning of the movie, Kevin has his entire extended family convinced he’s so helpless he can’t even pack a suitcase. I bet him attacking Bud and getting sent to his room early was a ploy to keep from having to share the bed with his bed-wetting cousin. At the end of the movie, one of his cousins says something like “Kevin went shopping? He can’t even tie his shoelaces!” This kid is playing his entire family like puppets and they have no idea

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

Like hell it does, that is reads like a 6k post at best. There’s no bit, no clown to gang up on. This post plays into the website’s deep appreciation of Kevin McAllister and his sadism but that can only take us so far. Study tumblr theory and come back to be the clown this post will ride to 40k if you truly want to bring us to victory. And also me to deep shame for having a viral post about Kevin fucking McAllister

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

Watching you suspiciously. Have I made myself the clown of the post again I cannot be three for three on this dude

[aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202]

Hey what are you doing. Hey.

[onlyjellyillputinmybelly]

What the fuck did yall do???

[garbage-empress]

they knew too much and kevin got them

[peocokruu]

Shippo is over it too, just kiss already !

twitter bluesky

[dxactivatxdusxr]

A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad

[fitzefitcher]

#this is team skull

[its-just-a-phage]

The pet store I worked at had a pen with rabbits near the front door. On every side of the pen were huge signs saying “You can pet me, but don’t pick me up!” One day two absolutely huge guys came in and one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend grabbed his arm and asked him “did you see the sign?” He said “yeah! it says that you can pick them up but don’t pet them!” Then he went quiet for a moment and softly said “I didn’t read it right did I?” And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder and said “its ok, i know you’ve got that thing where words get mixed up. Let just pet these cute lil shits” And I still haven’t gotten over that interaction.

[yallmightt]

I was walking my dog through Boston bc he likes the likes car rides. He’s a little thing tbh we call him short and long. So this huge scary man with a full beard approaches me like “hey can my buddy and I pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs but your’s is so small I think it’s a good place to start.” Ofc I was like “yes he’s very friendly!” So this guy brings his equally big friend over and they sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of my tiny dog so big man number one asks “can I pick him up?” And i say yes so he picks him up and puts him on man number two’s lap and man number two is abt to freak out and his friend straight up just goes “hey man, it’s okay just relax I’d never let anything hurt you. He’s a good boy.” I’ll never forget it ever bc I know that man looked at me (5'3 , glasses, probably wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda goofy looking little thing) and was like ‘ah yes the two least intimidating living things I’ve seen in Boston all day he’ll feel relaxed around them’ and went out of his way to help his friend. It makes me so happy

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

My husband had this Dungeons and Dragons group ages ago, and one of the guys was TERRIFIED of cats.  The moment he sees one he freezes up and can barely breathe.  Said guy is almost seven feet tall and solid wall of muscle.  Whenever he came over I’d put the cats in the bedroom and chill out with a book because my cats don’t like being shut away without one of us. 

One of my cats was pawing at the door and meowing loudly, an indication she REALLY needs to use the litter box.  I let her out and decide, hey, I’m hungry, and decide to the kitchen.  I forgot to shut the bedroom door. 

Next thing I hear is the group going completely silent.  My husband very calmly asks me to come over and help him gather our two cats up.  I go over to where the group is and my black cat, Cacoa, is rubbing up against the guy’s leg, purring, and doing her “let me on your lap” meow.  The other cat, Jasper, is sitting at the window, chilling out.  I go over and pick up Cacoa and tell the big dude she’s harmless, loves laps, and would be thrilled if he pet her.  Very slowly he touches my cat’s face, and she leans right into his hand.  He then pets her back and sighs because she’s really soft and purring like mad.  After a few minutes he asks how to pick her up and if it’s okay if she sits on his lap.

He spent the next six hours spoiling my cat.  The next week he showed up with cat treats and toys because he fell in love with the cats.  He told me he was doing some research on house cats, and even talked to a vet about them.  A couple months later he adopted two cats and was as thrilled and excited as a new parent. 

[ruffboi-mags]

Oh no a new one!!!

[jack-the-lion]

Blessed post.

[anaalihelmisimpukka]

I used to work at this stable for icelandic horses and every now and then this man would turn up by the field to just watch the horses. One time I walked by him as I was going to get the horses inside, and he went ”I always wanted to learn how to ride but I’m afraid of horses because they’re so huge. If I could ride ponies like this, maybe I’d dare but now I’m too big and heavy for them.” You should have seen his face when I told them that actually they’re not ponies, just small horses and they could totally carry him. His face just lit up. Next thing I’m helping him to get on back. Today he knows how to ride.

[stealthclaw1]

A few years ago my sister and I were in Daytona Beach, and we saw this huge, burly biker. Looked like the stereotypical biker: big black beard, the goggles, leather, and a bandana. He also had a baby carrier, and in that baby carrier was a tiny little orange Pomeranian. We complimented his dog and he said, in one of the deepest voices I’ve ever heard, “thanks, his name’s Little Bear!” And he told us about how he’d take Little Bear out on his motorcycle everyday and how much the dog loved it.

[depressedanxietydeath]

Such a lovely post.

[real-british-empire]

I’m not even putting this in the museum, it shall run free and collect more lovely stories.

[decepticonsensual]

My brother recently bought a house in the rural outskirts of his city, and apparently it's a real fixer-upper, but that's always been the kind of thing he loves doing. So he has a truck now (to haul stuff for all the repairs he's doing on the house). He's already fond of flannel. He bakes his own bread.

And now a cat has turned up, so he has a cat.

With Christmas rapidly approaching, it's dawning on me that my own brother is, in fact, Hallmark Christmas Movie Small Town Man.

If he shows up to Christmas dinner with a bewildered hedge fund manager who got stranded in his town and fell in love with him over an ice sculpture carving competition or some shit, I'm gonna have to stage an intervention.

[cipheramnesia]

god forbid men do anything

[calvinandhobbescomic]

[heroineimages]

Bill Watterson explained that the third panel is based on his dad, without exaggeration.

[ampervadasz]

[bumblebeerror]

THE CASUALNESS OF THAT COLLIE SLIPPING RIGHT OUT OF THEIR COLLAR. That dude is a Willing Participant of this walk and by god everyone else is going to follow the RULES.

[roach-works]

im a fan of the moment where the husky is like 'wait you're not authorized to do that' and the collie is like 'THE FUCK IM NOT'

[cycas]

I feel so much for that husky, a true gentleman who slowly and gently wanders a little further away, keeping an eye on his human, not moving at a speed where the human can't easily catch up... only to be yanked and body-slammed by the insane rules maniac collie who has not only made up a whole set of Correct Walk Rules but is determined to make that everyone else's problem. Weird that the notes are full of people saying the husky is stupid. No, the husky is behaving like a normal dog. The border collie is behaving like a total nutter, and the husky deserves praise for being so chill about it.