Just things

Kaja | Poland | dog lover | book reader | teacher | history nerd | addicted to foreign languages | occasionally writes things | more fandoms than you can count

[st-just]

Say what you will of the man, Talleyrand had a sense of style. 

[memecucker]

Shoutout to the time when the Papal States and France decides to gang up on Venice and then the Papal States and Venice decides to gang up on France and finally France and Venice were like “might as well” and allied against the Papal States all in the same war

[cryptid-sighting]

shoutout to Scotland just jumping in there for a few years and then peacing out

[apisashla]

[dykespeare-deactivated20181228]

the difference between crowley and aziraphale is that crowley would jump in front of a bullet for aziraphale whereas aziraphale would literally kill anyone who dared to point a gun at crowley

[dykespeare-deactivated20181228]

crowley: i would die for you

aziraphale: shut the fuck up that’s not happening

[degenerate-perturbation]

Spiritually this is true but textually when somebody pointed a gun at Crowley Aziraphale turned it into a water pistol and was embarrassed about it. Then he got pied in the face.

The lesson here is that Aziraphale and Crowley are way too huge a pair of losers to do anything as cool and dramatic as kill or die for each other.

[twofrontteethstillcrooked]

god i hope this is what happens

[egberts]

sometimes cats look so regal and majestic, sometimes they are just a blob melting off the side of a bed or coffee table, and sometimes they are a roast chicken

[egberts]

the blurry is right

[twoofcups]

dc literally has better villains than marvel because marvel antagonists are always like “i wear ALL BLACK and THREE PIECE SUITS and i kill people because i’m SAD inside” meanwhile everyone in gotham just be off the shits and have an actual aesthetic and presentation  

[wherewhywhat]

The villain’s in Gotham are better because no one can out do Bruce Wayne in  “i wear ALL BLACK and THREE PIECE SUITS and i beat up people because i’m SAD inside” so they had to come up with something else.

[twoofcups]

this is the only response anyone is allowed to put on this post actually 

[machiavellianfictionist]

A sword belonging to George Washington, first president of the United States of America. He is believed to have worn it during his resignation as Commander in Chief in 1783 and when inaugurated as president in 1789.

This type of sword was commonly worn by officers and other gentlemen in formal occasions. These weapons were developed as very light and compact civilian sidearms. It was commonly used for duels and sometimes for self-defense, but for military purposes most preferred a more substantial cut-and-thrust weapon, like a cutlass.

This blade is of the colichemarde variant, characterized by its wide forte which abruptly tapers into a narrow profile. Its hollow triangular shape makes it an excellent thrusting sword, but at the same time makes it incapable of cutting. The broad portion of the blade is decorated with intricate engravings. The grip is wrapped with silver ribbon and wire, while the rest of the hilt is gilt with silver and gold.

[copperplatescript]

marvel characters who are false advertising

ant-man: he can be ANY SIZE not just ant-sized

cyclops: this fucker has TWO eyes not just one

winter soldier: he is there all year round

wolverine: doesn’t wear a wolverine fursuit. you’d think he was a furry but no he isn’t

[shofarsogood]

Iron Man: suit made out of a gold-titanium alloy

Spider Man: only four limbs, doesn’t shoot web out his butt

[denimsnake]

mr. fantastic: he is awful

[kawree]

Black Widow: also only four limbs, also doesn’t shoot web out her butt, white

The Incredible Hulk: has 7 Ph.Ds when not angry and therefore is in fact actually quite credible

[e-wifey-deactivated20201128]

people understand that Spanish speakers speak different dialects of the Spanish language but don’t understand that black people speak a dialect of the English language

[yellowjuice-deactivated20190512]

saw a variation of this conversation on twitter earlier

[brainstatic]

I just want to state for the record that this is completely uncontroversial among linguists. It’s the first day of sociolinguistics class.

[nessa007]

Men of the world need to be more like Jake Peralta

[tallahasseemp3]

This is just The Magnus Institute.

[marzipanandminutiae]

Nope.

They have a gas-based firefighting system instead of sprinklers for obvious reasons. It does lower the percentage of oxygen in the building, but not enough to kill anyone.

I found this by googling “Yale library fire oxygen.” It was literally the first result.

Fact-checking is your friend.

[crazyintheeast]

It’s true. It’s not the fire suppression system that kills you. The Librarians come and personally murder you for starting a fire in a library. But you didn’t start a fire you say? No matter. You are collateral damage. Everybody gets killed to show that arsonists have no chance of escaping justice

[sweetsigyn]

I desperately want to see a scene with Thor and Loki where they have to remove all of their weapons. Thor puts down Mjolnir while we spend the next 5 minutes watching Loki remove most of his knives.

[nondescriptarchives]

AND WE HAVE THAT TROPE where knives are definitely where they SHOULDNT be or IS LITERALLY PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO BE. And with each passing blade the intimidating edges and intricate designs get scarier and scarier. And somehow THE KNIVES KEEP COMING????????? How??????

The how is that half of those knives aren’t real, just illusions that Loki cast cos the shit wanted to see the guard’s face when he pulled out a ridiculous number of weapons (he kept his real daggers, yes the smol ones, hidden on himself still.)

When he pulls out a knife during the meeting, the guard just gawks while everyone panics, “HOW THE HELL DO YOU STILL HAVE KNIVES WHAT THE FUCK??”

[darklingdawns]

Bonus points for Thor spending the entire time Loki’s pulling knives out of everywhere and nowhere studying his nails and being very obviously Done With It All. See, he knows his brother - his brother’s ALWAYS got knives, he keeps them in his little pockets of magical space, but they’ll humor the people they’re having the meeting with, so Thor waits. Then when Loki pulls out the knife in the meeting and everyone’s all about the panicking, there’s a loud sigh from Thor and an exasperated, “Lokiiii…” and that’s when Loki goes “Oh, all right,” (as only Hiddles can) and makes the knife disappear. But for the rest of the meeting, everyone knows Loki can access a knife anytime he wants to, so they’re all on edge and they basically agree to whatever the hell Thor and Loki ask for, if only so they can get these fuckers out of here. 

And then in the elevator, on the way back down, Loki turns to Thor and says brightly, “Much better than Get Help!”

[thescriptorium]

ive been thinking and honest to god: i think i would actually join a girl gang if the offer came. like a legitimate, hierarchical, “let’s carry knives under our skirts and beat up men” gang. fuck college

[thescriptorium]

bringing back the sukeban girl gangs from the 70’s that wore long skirts against teen sexualization and fucked things up for the patriarchy

[thescriptorium]

and this was no “5 girls in a small town” who made the news—this was yakuza level shit. 20,000 girls getting into gang fights and shoplifting and getting pissed off that only men were allowed to be rough and violent and angry

[thescriptorium]

and y’all wanna know the funniest part? immediately after this trend blew up, the Men decided to sexualize the hell out of these girls. this included movie adaptations and pornos where the skirts were made shorter and the tits were bigger cause apparently they had found their new fetish

but here’s how they actually looked, and it’s actually pretty badass:

[thescriptorium]

so anyways. who up for a girl gang

[lightresist]

guerrilla group | eyes + sins | silent augmentation | 2015 FW

[oopsabird]

god, GOD Freddie Mercury was such a fucking badass

[scumbagsblog]

This doesn’t do the moment justice. He took the swig of vodka, said “I’ll fucking do it darling”, and then ABSOLUTELY NAILED IT in one fucking take

[child-of-dolora]

Mood for 2019: “I’ll fucking do it, darling.”

[askclint]

[prokopetz]

I have to laugh when I see folks going “well, what if the artist didn’t intend for there to be any deep symbolism?” The Death of the Author entirely aside, any artist can tell you that the fact that you didn’t intend for there to be any deep symbolism doesn’t mean you didn’t put some there anyway. I personally know multiple fanfic writers who’ve put together what they thought was just an interesting bit of fluff, then they went back and re-read their own story a month later and they were all: “oh, god dammit - this is about my relationship with my mother, isn’t it?”

[latining]

I came out to have a good time and honestly I’m feeling so attacked right now.

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

I know I told this story before but last year I was having complications with a surgery and I just broke down in a public place and I was trying to gather myself, sitting and leaning on a wall when this girl in cowboy boots approached me and sat down and she asked what was wrong and I told her it was medical issues and she said “I understand, I have to have my foot amputated next week” and it shocked me out of crying and I was like “wow that sucks!” And she said “yeah.” And then she just touched my arm so tenderly and told me “I promise you that this problem will have its place, and everything is going to work out.” And the way she said it just made me really believe her. She said. “We’re just gonna have to cowgirl up.” And then she stood up and walked away and I’d call that a genuine encounter with an angel but the truth is there is a lot of goodness right here on earth in humanity and it’s shining and pure.

[rainfallinhell]

Okay but “this problem will have its place” is genuinely inspiring

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

THAT REALLY STRUCK ME because I’ve always hated the tired rhetoric of “this happened for a reason” and this feels like a more genuine, comforting take on that. Not “it happened for a reason,” but “this will find its spot in your life and your future that it fits into in a way that will eventually work out even though it sucks that it happened.” Love that.

[dykecosette]

We’re just gonna have to cowgirl up