Hopefully, I'll be able to make a better one someday! It's a very intensive process, and one that I might even need to call in help for. If I make a new post, I will link it to the top of this one.
Currently, I've had to redefine or throw out all my words and start rewatching the show from the very beginning, pausing every few scenes to take notes—which was awful and took the joy out of a rewatch, so I stopped and haven't touched the project since.
I don't even know how to approach the project, but I know I want to. I won't make any promises, but I will try my hardest. I might even make a Lego sideblog (or turn @sleepymilesguy into a general "project sideblog") just to get it done. If anyone can help, please send an ask over here or over there!
Kisses,
Miles
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Hello folks, it's Miles here! You may know me as the guy who deduced what Rayman is snorting in episode 5 of Captain Laserhawk! And today, I'll be going over how...
There Are 6 Types of Magic in LEGO Monkie Kid
You can honestly stop here if you don't want to get into the most convoluted stuff ever. If you're vaguely interested but don't have much time, click read more and scroll down to Red Son, because he's where shit gets interesting.
A disclaimer! I've literally never broken down or written a magic system before, I'm just like. writing down and making sense of what I've noticed while watching the show. If you disagree with my assessment of a character's magic, think there's a better term for something I've described, or think I'm just plain wrong, please let me know so I can update the post! I don't know what I'm doing, and I've never looked into magic systems before!
An important thing to note is that LEGO Monkie Kid adheres somewhat to the power systems in Chinese mythology, so I will be bringing up concepts from Chinese mythology that are not talked about in the show. Honestly, if you went 100% on the show and not on Chinese mythology at all, there wouldn't be a magic system in the first place.
Now, let's begin!
First, vocabulary.
Magic Class: The root of a user's magic. Classes are not exclusive, but actually compounding. For example, Wukong has Intrinsic-based Actively Cultivated Magic.
Magic Subtype: A modifier to a class; additional information to explain how a user's magic came to be or how it works. For example, Tang has Revitalized Bestow-Inherited Actively Cultivated³ Magic — the subtype goes before the class because it's a modifier. (Yes, I will explain why his Actively Cultivated Magic is cubed.)
(In the naming scheme of magic, everyone has a full classification and then a shorthand classification. The classifications above were all shorthand.)
Magical Energy: The basic form of magic; unfiltered energy that can be channeled, manipulated, and cultivated. This energy can be used to attack directly or utilized in a spell. MAGICAL ENERGY IS QI, "MAGIC" IS JUST BEING USED BECAUSE THIS IS WRITTEN FOR A WESTERN AUDIENCE.
Power: A defined ability, such as a spell or a technique. Not all Powers are explicitly named, but powers have defined forms and details whereas Magical Energy is usually a geometric shape. Examples of Powers: 72 Transformations, Golden Sight, teleportation.
Magical Expression: How Magical Energy and Powers form upon release. Examples of Magical Expression are glowing eyes, full body glowing, magical seals, anime-esque energy blasts, Red Son's* fire, Ne Zha's fire (two VERY different forms of Magical Expression), and Macaque's purple shadow outline. Ne Zha's Wind Fire Wheels are examples of Magical Expression with a conduit. Zero Magical Expression ≠ zero release, but can.
Conduits: Anything that can hold, channel, or manipulate Magical Energy. All living beings and magical artifacts are examples of conduits.
Channeling: Collecting magical energy internally
Releasing: The basis of Magical Expression; using collected magical energy for an attack
(Mei showcasing channeling and releasing in Rip and Tear)
You can always tell when a character is channeling and releasing.
Knowing which class of magic a character is using can be hard — they all tend to utilize anime-esque energy blast graphics and glowing bodies for Magical Expression — so you have to pay close attention. I'll be going over how to identify the specific magic types as we go through them.
Each type of magic has a "poster child" — a character that fully embodies that type — and I'll be using them to explain how the magic works. Once we finish the easily categorized magics, we'll get into the Special Cases.
(MK showcasing Intrinsic Magic in Rip and Tear)
(Wukong showcasing Cultivated Magic in A Lifetime of Mistakes)
Now, onto the classes of magic!
Intrinsic Magic is a class of magic...
That's not inherently pedigree-related. Ne Zha's father Li Jing was a mortal man.
Most gods and local deities have, and some yaoguai have. (Older demons like DBK and Wukong have Intrinsic Magic, while younger demons like Pigsy and Sandy might technically have Inherited Magic. It all depends on how you want to look at it.)
That usually comes with unique powers, commonly the ability to walk and talk upon birth. (Wukong got laser eyes, and Red Son* got the Samadhi Fire).
And holders have unnatural births? Pangu's cosmic egg, Ne Zha being born a ball of flesh after being gestated for three years, Wukong's rock that's existed since the dawn of time, etc.
Ne Zha is the epitome of Intrinsic Magic! If you think Intrinsic Magic, you think Ne Zha. The unmistakable way to identify Intrinsic Magic is to look for themes. If a character has a theme to their magic, again and again, they likely have Intrinsic Magic! For example:
Ne Zha's Intrinsic Theme is (obviously) lotus flowers/petals.
Red Son's* Intrinsic Theme is flames.
Macaque would be a contender for intrinsic magic (we will be getting back to him, though).
Cultivated Magic is a class of magic that has two subclasses: ACTIVE and PASSIVE, and...
That's ENTIRELY self-created. A magical pedigree can help, but no pedigree is required in Cultivated Magic — Li Jing cultivated magic as a completely human man, for example.
That NEEDS a Conduit. The conduit for Cultivated Magic can be the magic user themselves, but often it's a magical artifact or a technique.
Note: a conduit doesn't require Cultivated Magic to be used, but Cultivated Magic requires a conduit. (Known Conduits include: Wukong's Cloud Somersault, Nezha's Wind Fire Wheels, and Princess Iron Fan's Banana Leaf Fan.)
That's very backstory-heavy. There's always a way that a character learned or got their power, or a description of how old they are.
A magic that you see most with yaoguai and immortals. The older the yaoguai, the more cultivated they are.
Passive Cultivation: Every living being is a conduit for passive cultivation — by existing, you are passively cultivating. The best method of passive cultivation is age; the older something is, the more passively cultivated.
A Huli jing is the best example of passively cultivated magic. According to literature, the older a fox is, the more power it accrues.
Active Cultivation: Active Cultivation is when a being seeks out magical power. The most common form of active cultivation is being taught Tao techniques (Wukong's Cloud Somersault, Li Jing's Burning Pagoda Art). In this situation, the technique is the conduit.
Other forms of actively cultivating magic are yaoguai eating humans and magic-accruing technology (specifically DBK's Furnace armor, which converts rarity into magical energy.)
Cultivated Magic comes with the implication of being wise, at least in some form, and those with cultivated magic are able to teach others. Being a disciple immediately means you have Actively Cultivated Magic.
Cultivated Magic often doesn't have Magical Expression, because it's all about existing and learning. When it does have Magical Expression, it's usually depictions of strength and power or the conduit itself glowing.
(Wukong's hairs glow as they are used as conduits for his cloning technique in Macaque)
(Wukong and Macaque's strength is showcased through Magical Expression during a fight in Macaque)
Cultivated Magic can be seen through any technique that was stated to have learned, such as Wukong's astral projection and his speed/quick reflexes.
(Wukong focusing in order to astral project to MK in Dumpling Destruction)
(MK having to actively learn and practice astral projecting in Minor Scale)
MK: Monkey King! It worked!
Monkey King: Hey, bud. So, you figured out astral projection, huh?
MK: Yeah, and I only had five nose bleeds.
Cultivated Magic is best showcased in action, and characters cultivate over the course of the show.
(Wukong showcasing his Cultivated Magic by pulling some fast ones on MK in Impossible Delivery)
(4 seasons later in Strings That Bind, Wukong and MK spar, showcasing MK's Cultivated Magic. Tumblr will NOT let me embed both videos, and the first one is more important, so this will just be a link.)
Inherited Magic is a class of magic that has two subclasses: ANCESTERAL and BESTOWED, and...
Comes from someone else and was given to or passed down to the magic user.
Is sourced from Intrinsic or Cultivated Magic, but the magic user is not intrinsically magical/did not cultivate that magic themselves. The Intrinsic/Cultivated Magic is specific to another (perhaps deceased) being.
Can have ZERO Magical Expression or release.
If a character has Ancestor-Inherited Magic, they'll have a family animal, a family artifact, and/or a known ancestor.
If a character has Bestow-Inherited Magic, they were given their power by another magic user (known as the Bestower) so that they would serve that magic user, defeat a foe, or as a reward. Bestow-Inherit Magic users are often previously mortal.
Bestow-Inherited Magic is most blatantly a character giving another character magical powers, but being granted godhood, being brought back to life under a deal, and everyone receiving heavenly ranks/Wukong and Tripitaka receiving Buddhahood and Buddha titles at the end of Journey To The West is also Bestow-Inherited Magic.
A quick note: Older yaoguai (DBK, Azure Lion, Wukong) are considered to have Intrinsic Magic, but Modern yaoguai (Pigsy, Sandy) are deemed to have Inherited Magic. This is because these younger demons are not yaoguai specifically unto themselves — their status as a yaoguai comes from their ancestors. They have no unique, intrinsic powers, nor were they specifically predestined to be yaoguai despite their heritage (such as in the case of Nezha, who was predestined to be a celestial being).
For example, Pigsy. His status as a Magic User exists because of his family history. While, yes, his family is important to his character and story, it's not something he did himself — he did not cultivate his grandma — and there is nothing unique about him biology-wise besides just being a pig demon. He is a reincarnation, but being a reincarnation didn't make him a yaoguai. (That was a whole fate, symbolism deal, though.) If Pigsy hadn't been born, his family would still have a pig demon kid.
Now, onto the subtypes. (As a reminder, a subtype modifies a class!)
Revitalized Magic is a subtype of magic. It means that the magic is from a pre-incarnation that a character unlocks and requires reincarnation.
Uuuuunless it doesn't, and it required Un-Death. Auto-Revitalization of Magic is definitely a thing, but it's not a real category. It's just a specification to explain things that have happened to a character.
For example: The reason Macaque's shadows turned into chaos magic at the end of season 5 is because he's dead. He's outside of the reincarnation cycle, he's Undead, his magic is Auto-Revitalized —so when the reincarnation cycle is broken, his magic is also changed. At least, that's my personal theory. I might be DEAD WRONG.
Okay, back to Revitalized Magic proper: Remember back when I said Tang's magic was cubed? Yeah, this is why. (Before we start, Táng Sānzàng will be referred to as Tripitaka from here on out.)
The full classification of Tang's magic is: Potential Revitalized Bestow-Inherited (Tripitaka), Revitalized Actively Cultivated (Golden Cicada), Revitalized Actively Cultivated (Tripitaka), Actively Cultivated Magic. (Maybe, we'll get into this.)
The entire reason demons tried to eat Tripitaka was because he was the reincarnation of the Golden Cicada, who was a disciple of Buddha, which made Tripitaka's flesh holy. Being a disciple immediately means Actively Cultivated Magic; Tripitaka had Revitalized Actively Cultivated Magic. Tripitaka was a Buddhist disciple as well, which means he also Actively Cultivated. If Tang is a reincarnation of Tripitaka, who is a reincarnation of the Golden Cicada, then Tang has Revitalized Actively Cultivated Magic twice (or, even, 10 times, if you look at the Sandalwood Buddha thing, but Tripitaka and Golden Cicada are the important disciples so we're only counting them).
If Tang has Revitalized Actively Cultivated Magic and Revitalized Actively Cultivated Magic, that means he has Revitalized Actively Cultivated Magic². However,
Tang is a SCHOLAR. BEING A SCHOLAR MEANS THAT TANG IS ALSO AN ACTIVE CULTIVATOR.
HENCE, TANG HAS ACTIVELY CULTIVATED MAGIC³.
Celestial Magic is a subclass of magic that includes any magic with a seal. It's not exclusive to Celestial beings, but it's most often used by beings with Heavenly connections.
Celestial Magic is also known as "Spells", I'm pretty sure. Wukong just dropped this terminology on us in Season 5, and spells usually require words, but like. Okay, buddy. Whatever. You're the magic guy.
Celestial Seals have a unique symbol for every "Artist", or a Hànzì that explains the spell's purpose. For example, Li Jing's seals have a little pagoda on them, and the containment spell's seal (the only thing that can truly be called a spell here) has the character "牢", which means "prison" (or "enclosure", which is hilarious because it's containing 3 monkeys).
Consequential Magic is any magical energy or power gained as a result of an action taken by someone who is NOT the magic user.
Consequential is not a subclass of Cultivated because the magic user had no say in acquiring/did not know they were acquiring Consequential Magic; Consequential is not a subclass of Inherited because the magic user was not intentionally given these powers and they did not come from ancestry.
(Red Son* is literally the reason this subtype exists.) Every example of Consequential Magic is different, so I'm just going to some of the ones I know of in canon:
Wukong's Golden Sight (Consequence of the Eight Trigrams Furnace; Torture-consequence)
Ao Lie having the Samadhi Fire inside him after they fucked up the seal (Samadhi Fire/Red Son*; Samadhi-consequence)
Mei Dragon's ability to harness the Samadhi Fire/the remnants left over inside her after (Samadhi Fire/Red Son*; Samadhi-consequence)
MK's human form (form as in the shape of something btw) (Xiangliu fucked his shit up; Birth Interference-Consequence)
Macaque's new Chaos Magic (Xiangliu fucked his shit up; Chaos-Consequence)
I have spent this entire post explaining the way magic seems to work in LEGO Monkie Kid, getting slightly more and more unhinged as we go on. But there might be two things on your mind: Why? and Why does Red Son's* name have an asterisk on it every time I've mentioned him in this post?
I can answer both of those questions with one statement: Red Son does not adhere to the magic rules other characters follow. I've tried to find examples to see if I was thinking of the magic wrong — and that's fully possible — but I didn't find anything. In fact, the more I look, the more sure of this I become. It's like he actively decides against following the rules of the magic system.
He can be used as EXAMPLES of the magic system, but when you dig into his magic specifically, it's completely wack-a-doo.
First and foremost:
Red Son has a completely unique form of Magic Expression. His emotions are directly linked to his Magical Expression and release.
Emotionally linked magic release is something no other character does, but here he is doing it over and over and over again. The only example close to it is MK's Mystic Monkey form flickering in and out when he's distraught, and that's LITERALLY CREATION-GIVEN NÜWA MAGIC, THAT'S FROM A CREATURE WHOSE CANONICALLY "OUTSIDE OF THE 10 SPECIES" AND CANNOT BE CATEGORIZED?? AND ALSO NOT QUITE THE SAME EITHER.
(This could also be attributed to the concentration part of the Samadhi Fire, but he doesn't... seem to have access to that anymore? At least, not like Mei does. We'll consider it a factor in his magic expression, though.)
About his fire,
Red Son and his mom are the only two characters with Wuxing/Elemental Magic — every other example comes from a magical artifact. It's actually a 50/50 chance on whether or not PIF has wind powers or if the Banana Leaf Fan gives her wind powers (I'm pretty sure it gives her wind powers, but just to be safe we'll count her as having wind powers.) Wuxing Magic is not uncommon in actual Chinese mythology, but it is in the show for some reason. And it ALWAYS has an artifact as a conduit. Wuxing Magic always seems to be just a visual effect or an added addition to attacks in the show.
Another weird ass thing about Red Son's magic is its contrast with Nezha's. I'm pretty sure Red Son's fire is actual fire that he conjures magically, in contrast to Nezha's Wind Fire Wheels (conduits that Nezha fuels, and release Wuxing Magic as a visual effect) which make specifically magical fire.
Okay, so, I've been going through this assuming you're aware of the show's visuals concerning magic, but this is important for me to cover in detail. Everyone has two magic colors (white doesn't count for this). They can change in lighting, but you'll always recognize them as being the same general colors. Other colors may be used for emphasis, but they'll only be darker versions of the colors and they'll be used as a background for the main colors. (Quick note, MK and Wukong might have only one magic color? Fun stuff.)
The reason I think Red Son's magic is not... magic persay, is because it doesn't follow the color rule. Like, it's not actually the color of Red Son's magical energy half the time, it doesn't follow the magic color rule. Red Son's fire shifts like an actual fire, which is very cool visually, but is not how magic works.
(Quick note, magic seems to be lighter in the celestial realm. This is because the Celestial Realm is really well-lit. The environment is literally pure sunlight or some shit, so all the characters and their magic are in perfect lighting. So Red Son's magic getting inexplicably darker would make no sense unless Red Son's magic is doing that on its own and the lighting has nothing to do with it.)
His magic also isn't the color of the Samadhi Fire, nor is his fire. That time in season 5 when Mei helped him with the seal, the two of them together made a Samadhi Fire-colored seal. He didn't seem capable of doing that by himself, which leads me to my conclusion:
I think the suppression of the Samadhi Fire suppressed Red Son's Intrinsic Magic as a whole, and his magical core (as one user put it) is compensating by drawing directly from his element.
Characters having an element isn't a new thing. Wukong's element is metal, he's a metal guy, it's why he can't swim, and it's why MK can't swim. MK needs floaties because he'll sink like a rock because he shares the metal element with Wukong.
But this is a possible explanation for why Red Son's magic is so weird.
On the note of Mei having more access to the Samadhi Fire than him, Skellebonez (my rock through this journey of a post) brought up a good point: "[I] think it makes sense because whatever they did to remove it from him could have also added a barrier preventing its return to an extent[.] Like a filter[.]"
This Intrinsic Magic cap/Samadhi Filter might also explain why he keeps getting his shit rocked despite having such potential to be powerful (that's probably just because it's silly tho) and it could explain why his parents are so damn disappointed in him in season 1. It's because they took his magic from him (however unintentionally) and he's not as magical anymore. The only type of categorizable magic he uses is Celestial magic, which HUMANS can use and can be bestowed on ANYONE. You can just like... LEARN THAT, and I think he just did.
In canon, nobody ever seems to be hurt by Red Son's fire? It seems to just be... a thing that he does. Everyone is less and less scared of it as the show goes on, and the only thing it does major damage to is MK's apartment. He uses his fists to attack more than he uses his fire, it's generally left as a visual effect. Red Son uses his fire as an intimidation tactic, not as an actual weapon, and I think this could also be explained by an Intrinsic Magic cap. His intrinsic magic is suppressed, so he has to rely on things like physical strength/cultivation.
I also think nobody knows this in canon, they didn't know about it, or they don't understand it. I think Red Son has a magic limiter on him, which is why his parents were such raging fuckasses in season one. They thought their son was "useless", or in Wukong's words, "half-baked", after showing such promise in his childhood before an incident. They only got a healthier relationship after they stopped obsessing over power and spent some family time together, when they realized that their son being a powerful magical demon isn't the most important thing in the world. (AND WE WEREN'T SHOWN IT.)
Red Son is magic-disabled, in this essay I did.
ALL MAGIC COMES FROM THE PRIMORDIAL CHAOS, SO, IN ACTUALITY, ALL OF IT IS THE SAME! FUCK YOU!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
The Princess Character (10154 words) by SleepyMiles
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Ouran High School Host Club - All Media Types
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Suoh Tamaki & The Ouran High School Host Club, Ootori Kyouya & Suoh Tamaki, Hitachiin Hikaru & Suoh Tamaki, Fujioka Haruhi & Suoh Tamaki, Fujioka Ryouji | Ranka & Suoh Tamaki, Sonoda Isao | Sonoda Misuzu & Suoh Tamaki
Characters: Suoh Tamaki, Ootori Kyouya, Hitachiin Hikaru, Fujioka Haruhi, The Ouran High School Host Club, Fujioka Ryouji | Ranka, Sonoda Isao | Sonoda Misuzu, Ouran High School Host Club Ensemble
Additional Tags: Trans Female Character, Gender Transition, Gender Dysphoria, Trans Suoh Tamaki, Coming Out, Trans Female Sonoda Misuzu, Suoh Tamaki Being Suoh Tamaki, Suoh Tamaki Needs a Hug, and she gets one!, Protective Ootori Kyouya, Kyoya loves Tamaki so much you don't understand, you can read them as romantic if you feel like it no skin off my back, The Ouran High School Host Club as Family, Troublesome Hitachiin Twins, Hikaru was born a problem and remains that way, but he's really just worried about his big sister, Hani and Mori are. here., Gratuitous Outfit Descriptions, Crossdressing
Summary:
After fulfilling a long-running costume request, Tamaki finds himself with questions.
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A friend uttered the words "transfem lesbian Tamaki" a single time and it spiraled into this. I literally found evidence in the manga. She's my daughter and I love her.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Jubjub Bird (1739 words) by SleepyMiles
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Gachiakuta (Manga), Gachiakuta (Anime)
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Zanka Nijiku & Jabber Wonger, Zanka Nijiku & Rudo Surebrec, Hyo & Zanka Nijiku, Enjin & Zanka Nijiku
Characters: Zanka Nijiku, Lovely Assistaff (Gachiakuta), Minor Apperance from Bro Santa, Minor Apperance from Dear Santa, Minor Apperance from Enjin, Jabber Wonger As An Intrusive Thought, Rudo Surebrec As An Intrusive Thought, Hyo (Gachiakuta) As An Intrustive Thought
Additional Tags: Zanka Nijiku-centric (Gachiakuta), Nonsense Literature, Literary References & Allusions, Disassociation, Unreliable Narrator, kinda sorta, if you can bare with this I hope you like it, Canon Compliant, she/her pronouns for lovely assistaff, Not Beta Read, (yet), Inspired by Jabberwocky, Inspired by Alice in Wonderland
Summary:
A Jubjub bird's internal machinations after facing the Jabberwock. A permanent imprint left by failing to keep up; nonsense in shades of gloop-green and burbly-blue.
Jabber Wonger = Jabberwocky, so I had to try to step up to the plate and write some nonsense prose about Jabber's impact on Zanka. Has anyone done this before?
Replicating Mei's fake social media in A Hero Is Born was super hard, but I did it! Shout out to me making a typeface based off of the letters from screenshots because my handwriting wasn't good enough. Yes, I have the entire alphabet. Also wtf why does she use light mode.
XSWL - xiào sǐ wǒ le; "laughing to death". Equivalent to LOL or LMAO.
U1S1 - yǒu yī shuō yī; "honestly speaking". Used to say one is being genuine, like "seriously" or "literally".
Zanka watched the trash beast fall. It's body diswirled into the foul air. He'd almost taken care of this one on entirely alone.
It ain't enough.
Never enough.
His mind flashed with a memory of wicks spreooled down towards him like tentacles. That wicked smile. Claws that catch fabric and skin and mind.
Then, disappointment.
"Maybe I shoulda picked one of the other Cleaners…"
Zanka grit his teeth and gripped Assistaff tighter. He had to do better. He had to get stronger.
He had none of the natural talent of that frumious Rudo or the manxome Jabber. No, Zanka was an average person trying to catch up. When a lothiful creature such as him stepped up to the plate, it only made sense for him to get snapped up by the jaws of the Jabberwock.
"Zanka!" called Bro from down below. "That was impressive! You're getting stronger every day!"
Compliments from Bro weren't as sweet as those from Enjin, but the praise still quiveled down his spine to his gut. He hmphed and nodded instead of saying anything back.
"Come down here, Zanka. We've been working hard, we should get something to eat." Zanka went to refuse, but Bro had more to say: "I heard there was a town near here with great stew."
…Zanka could go for stew. Warm stew with meat and spices that coats the borming chegration that burbles in the gut with something nicer. Something easier to swallow back down.
He jumped down to meet Bro and Dear. Bro smiled and clapped him on the back.
"Glad I didn't have to convince you! Dear doesn't like to work when he's hungry."
"Nobody does," Zanka hummed as he looked down at the young Cleaner.
Dear haruffed. An uffish brat, as always.
Bro called for the Supporters join them, then led the way while Dear kept to his father's side. While Zanka's feet tranbbled behind the father-son duo, his mind lingered on battles lost, not yet waged, and soon-to-get-reprisal. Lingered on the Jabberwock.
"ZANKA! Ol' buddy, ol' pal! Quit frontin' and le's go! Crash out all over my couch, man!" Jabber chortled, hullawed. "Cleaners, Raiders—I couldn't care less! No more playin', no more hidin'! SHOW ME THAT MONSTER YA GOT TUCKED AWAY!"
Zanka felt the sting of invecusie and despine at the memory. He needed to be stronger. He needed another chance. He needed to prove he could best that beast.
He drummed his fingers on Lovely's shaft and worried his lip. Mankira glinkled in his mind's eye—mocking him. Mocking Assistaff. He smoothed his thumb over her wood comfortingly, but she didn't need any comforting.
They'd reached the restaurant; a rown hole-in-the-wall. Zanka wondered what kind of places the Jabberwock ate at. The Jabberwock had such big jaws, jaws for biting, jaws for laughing—did he eat a lot? Or, did he neglect that in search of "fun"? How did he like his meals? Spicy or mild? Did he have table manners or was he unmanliette? Zanka wondered.
"Hey, Zanka, what'cha want?" Bro asked.
Zanka forgot what he said as he said it. Bro seemed to accept whatever it was.
Zanka leaned an elbow on the table and set his chin in his hand, disregarding decuiety for the sake of musderment. He drummed his fingers on Assistaff's shaft.
His Lovely wasn't much. She wasn't as quick or as shiny as Mankira; she went thwicker-thwack instead of shwing-shwish. An lothiful sort of stick, matching Zanka himself. To imagine the two of them could be previctant aversis a Jabberwock was folly. Yet… His Assistaff wasn't much, but she was vorpal and resilate. She could break bone and slice flesh. Zanka bet that—if they put their all into it—they could sever Jabber's laughing head from his body.
Jabber would certainly like that, wouldn't he? Yeah. Yeah.
Jabber would salivate at the thought. He would beg Zanka to take his best shot. Would tumpise about before he fell to his knees, "Please, Zan-ka~! Behead me! Quick, quick, quick! I'm beggin' you here!"
Zanka ran his hand down Assistaff's length and sighed. Would he be able to?
Not yet.
He wasn't good enough yet.
He tried to imagine what he'd look like when he was. More like his sister? With her briant coat and schmakered-up face? Like formposing Goka? Like the Barmaglot, with her natural talent? The thought thrached in his gut. Someone slid a bowl of stew in front of him. Zanka lifted the bowl to his lips and slurped the broth. Warmth slilled down his gullet. Sestled in his belly to chaout the tawfiling. Mimsy, mimsy little brother.
Over his shoulder, in his mind, the Barmaglot sleered and sleered with her blank eyes while the Jabberwock laughed and laughed with his big jaws. Zanka grabbed the spoon set beside it and scooped some suef; an average meal for an average person. Zanka took a bite that coated his munge, slilled down his gullet, sestled in his belly, and tasted like warmth and nothing. Nothing. Like he was.
The Average Nothing wondered what the Bandersnatch was doing. Beittering, beworsering. Mome and without his teacher, because Zanka was musdering about Jabberwocks and Barmaglots and geniuses.
Dear was scooning his stew and pouring it back in the bowl, giving the chunks of suef a scornful look. Bro seemed to be begging in vain for him to give it a try, but Zanka couldn't really hear him over the hullawing of the Jabberwock, the sleering of the Barmaglot, and his thoughts of the Bandersnatch. Quite like Dear, the Bandersnatch was an awful brat. Quite like Dear, the Bandersnatch was born with talent Zanka couldn't have even hoped for. Unlike Dear, the Bandersnatch sought Zanka out like he was worth something.
Teaching a Bandersnatch wasn't easy, and Zanka didn't like it. Every gnarlish grinimace and disspentence reminded him of the beast's missocialization. Plastic flowers watered with sympity sat by a mimsersome infirmary bed. Buggish red eyes gawnched closely, nothing and exactly like the sleering of the Barmaglot. What did they see when he looked inside Zanka?
Probably nothing of importh. Likely, the bottom of a well. Zanka's persoule must be tulgey. Somewhere a despanging creature could uptuzy, unremarkable in its mimsy.
Bro looked at him and his lips moved. Zanka looked down at his bowl and ate more.
He didn't feel the warmth of the stew in his belly this time, and it tasted of nothing. The chegration had upfaught him; simple remedies wouldn't cure his tawfiling. No, Zanka was damned to walwoter in his inficrity until he died from it.
The Jabberwock set his head upon Zanka's shoulder; his fuzzy tentacles ticched Zanka's face as they draped over his shoulder and into his lap. He could feel the Jabberwock's grin, feel the fumedy he derived from gawnching over the way Zanka wrimthed. "Hey, Mr. Bad Attitude," he could practically hear the Jabberwock croon, "what's got chu so upset chu cain't even enjoy ya lunch break? Is it liddle ol' me?"
Pain swoomed in his jaw from the force of how hard he greshed his teeth.
"You should finish your stew," the Barmaglot deadpanned from where she stood behind him. "How do you expect to keep your strength? From your own ego eating itself?"
Zanka forleced down another bite of suef.
"I think he's trying his best," the Bandersnatch berescended, his strained voice indicating one of his indemilating grinimaces. "It's hard to keep going after as many failures as Zanka's had."
Zanka bit the spoon just to feel the sarche in his teeth.
He had to beitter. Ain't enough. They won't shut up. Woise in his head, reminding him he's inficrite. Average. Not enough to behead the Jabberwock. Not enough to best the Barmaglot. Not enough to train the Bandersnatch.
KWII KREE GRG!
Zanka's head jerked upwards, awareness of his surroundings dourushing over him like cold water. After an entire meal spent in his head, he was now aware of the woroubled glances sent his way by Bro, of the deeper croodges in Dear's allfurrowed brow as the kid stared, of the sound of the Supporters chitter-chattering at the other table.
GWII KRK GREE!
Zanka raised his wrist to his mouth and pressed his choker.
"Hello?"
"'Ey, Zan-zan!" came the relant voice of Enjin.
"Enjin? Why are you calling?"
"Just wanted to see how my favorite powerhouse was doing, that's all," Enjin himm-hummed. "I've hardly seen ya since you got out of the clinic!"
"Oh," Zanka felt his face flush.
"So?" Enjin's voice rose a little, "How are ya doin', kid? C'mon!"
"I'm…" Zanka tried to find words to say through the haztic of his mind. He remembered Assistaff was still nestled between his legs, reached for her with his free hand, and held her so he could press his forehead against her resilate wood.
"…you're?"
"'M fine. Missions are going well," Zanka managed. He ran his fingers down her length then back up. "We've been trying to clear out this entire area."
"Good. You're damn impressive, you know that?"
Pride swoomed in Zanka's chest and blotemed as a bright flush on his cheeks. He didn't bother to suppress his smile when Enjin couldn't possibly see it.
"Soooo… What'cha up to right now?"
"Lunch break."
"Seems more like a dinner break, actually."
"Is it?"
"Yeah, kid. 'S like six P.M."
"Lost track of time," Zanka mumfled with a frown. "We should get back out there."
"You should get back to HQ."
"Sorry to interrupt"—Bro interjected—"but I agree with Enjin. It's only two hours before Dear's bedtime."
Zanka sighed. There was nothing to be done about it.
He'd have to pick up the mission again tomorrow.
He'd have to keep working.
He has to be enough. He has to-
"Ay, Zanka."
"Yeah?"
"Rudo misses you," came Enjin's quiet himm-humm. "Don't tell him I said that, but everybody can tell. You gonna stick around to help train him tomorrow?"
Zanka tatumped his head against Assistaff's shaft. "Maybe."
"I'll take that as a yes."
"It's not a yes? That's not what I said!"
"Then, why'd I hear yes?"
"Because you weren't listening to me?"
"Ehhh, I think it's because Rudo deserves to be taught by his super strong teacher."
Zanka bit his lip and tatumped against Assisstaff again. The mission would have to wait. The trash beasts would have to wait. The Jabberwock would have to wait.
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