Song: Older - 5 Seconds of Summer feat. Sierra Deaton
Genre: Angst? With some fluff in the end
Warning: none I guess, but let me know if I’ve missed something
Note: I love this man so much it physically hurts!! Help!!
I missed some arms holding me during the night. I missed his arms.
We decided to take a break, and I couldn’t even remember why, I just know that I missed him to death, but my stupid pride wouldn’t let me call him.
I missed waking up every single morning and seizing his silly face beside me; I missed holding his hand, that was too big compared to mine; I missed creating some imaginary constellations with the moles in his face, tracing the lines with my fingers, and him melting into the touch; I missed him walking around the house and starting to sing some random songs; I missed him.
Maybe staying in bed and continue to think wasn’t good enough. I grabbed my phone and walked to the living room, where I turned on the tv and watched some random things. Didn’t even bothered to check the name of the program, I wasn’t really interested anyway.
It was 3am, and in four hours I had to wake up. That’s cool.
The bell rang and destroyed the calm night.
Who the hell came at my house at 3am?
With a mix of worry and fear I walked to the door, expecting nothing but the worst.
I opened the door and in front of me the only man I’ve ever loved in my entire life, was waiting with a hint of agitation in his face.
“YoungHyun” I whispered, catching his attention.
“Hey - he started- I had a nightmare about you and just wanted to make sure you’re okay”
Why talking to him now kinda seemed off?
I wanted my YoungHyun back. The annoying boy who constantly teased me for everything, but also encouraged me to do all the things I was scared of; the boy who stole some food from my plate, cause he knew that would have made me mad; the boy I love.
“I’m okay” I simply said.
His hand was placed on the side of the door, and the other one was lazily laying o his side.
He was tired, I could have tell that.
“Are you okay?” I asked him.
I needed to know he was doing okay, even if it was a lie, I needed him to say those words.
“Yeah, I guess” he chuckled.
It was a sad chuckle, not the cute one he always made.
“Well, then… see you around” he said after some moments of silence we spent looking into each others eyes.
I had a teacher, once, who tried to be funny and said to one my classmates, who didn’t knew the answer to a question he just made “if we keep staring at each other we will fall in love”, I literally hated that teacher, but every time I locked eyes with YoungHyun I thought that, maybe, he was right, cause every time I looked at him I was dragged, once again, in the whole of love for him.
‘Please don’t go’ my mind was screaming.
But he was walking down the stairs, and I couldn’t help but look at him.
When he turned, following the stairs, and he faced me once again, he gave me a smile. God, I loved him so much.
I smiled back and once he disappeared I closed the door.
If my night was already sleepless now everything will be definitely worse.
Maybe some tea would have helped me calm my nerves.
I was about to walk to the kitchen when a serie of soft knocks from my door catch my attention.
“Sorry” he said as soon as I opened the door.
‘I love you! You don’t have to be sorry for nothing!’ My mind wanted to scream to him.
“For what I’m going to saying, but I really need to take this out of my chest- he faced me and his eyes were kinda teary, and all I wanted to do was to hug him- Listen, I can’t continue like this. I need you, i seriously do. The boys all told me I don’t look the same, I can’t even sleep properly anymore. Even eating now kinda makes me sick, and you know how much I love to eat. Music is the only thing that makes me alive right now, but it’s just cause through my lyrics I can feel you again. You're my life, why can't I be yours?” With those final words he completely destroyed me.
Tears stared to run down my face, silently, and I knew it, but decided to ignore them. He was crying too, but when he noticed that I started as well, first, he dried some of my tears, using his thumb.
“that’s the problem, K - he smiled when I used his surname I always gave him - you are my life. I can’t even do anything without being reminded of you. I miss you so much and I can see that we have some things in common here, cause I can’t sleep either”
He reclutantly moved his hand to caress my face, and I didn’t tried to hold back.
“I’ve missed you to death” he whispered, coming closer.
Our eyes met and, as Pete Wentz once said, ‘totally back in love’.
“Can you, please, forgive me? I can’t do this without you anymore” he said, again, in a low tone.
I wasn’t able to form some words with a meaning, so I just nodded countless times.
“Please say it, I need to hear it”
He smiled and his face came closer to mine.
“Can I kiss you?” His voice was a soft caress.
I couldn’t resist but laugh at his expression, cause he was just too cute.
He connected our lips and I could feel him smile.
“Now I have a request- I said, as soon as our lips parted - stay the night?” I held his hand, preventing him to go away.
He nodded and followed me inside the apartment we used to share.
I turned off the tv and we both walked to the bedroom.
“I missed this place” he said, laying flat on his back on the bed.
“This place missed you too” I sat beside him, just staring at his perfect face.
He noticed me staring and moved his hand to touch me, and let our hands interlock.
“I love you” he whispered.
I lay down next to him, facing him for a brief moment.
When we both decided to sleep I turned around and turned off the light, making myself comfortable.
YoungHyun, behind me, shuffled and came closer to me, placing his arm on my waist.
He placed a couple of kisses on the back of my neck, tickling me.
His hand was caressing my waist, and then the little bastard put his hand - his cold freezing hand- directly on my skin, moving my t-shirt.
“And just WHERE do you think you’re putting your hand?”
“But I’m cold” he says in the babies tone ever.
“You’re lucky I love you” I joked, and he laughed.
How much I’ve missed all of this.
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