Let’s reheat those Southern Raiders nachos
I don’t like how people will sometimes argue that Aang was right and all that juju during the SR episode. I’ll see people say that Aang was supporting her because he “knew what she actually needed” but that misses the ENTIRE POINT of the episode. The point was never if Aang was right or Zuko was, I find it strange under these circumstances when people treat Katara agency/feelings like something almost akin to a child throwing a tantrum.
I can’t really explain it but people tend to put Aang on this moral pedestal like he always knew what Katara needed when it is canon that she doesn’t actually follow his advice. Aang has little to nothing to do with the choice Katara made. She knows right from wrong and she is not a natural killer, but she also isn’t opposed to it either. It’s just something about the argument that reeks of misogyny. I see a lot of people mention how he actually can relate to her pain, but I would go as far to say as that doesn’t matter within the context of what we’re talking about it. He used his grief as an example of what Katara should or shouldn’t do. Their grief is not the same, and they aren’t the same people (aka they don’t process grief the same way clearly). It is insensitive to compare grief in general, but using it as a reason for someone to not act a certain way is even worse. I just want to clarify that mentioning your grief in order to connect with others is not wrong, in fact when used correctly it is a great way to empathize with ohers and something that katara actually does a lot throught the series( with jet and haru).
However, Aang is not actually mentioning his greif in order to show Katara he understands her pain and wants to connect with her emotionally, hes only mentioning it as if to say, "I've also experienced something similar (but not really bc why is the first thing he mentions Appa being stolen??) but I didn't do what you're about to". The tone of his voice indicates that he's judging her, and throughout their conversation, it feels like he's really talking at her, as if he can't see her grief for what it is, interpreting it as just petty revenge, which begs the question does he really ever understand her? How can he have travelled with her for the whole summer and not seen how she still grieved for her mother??
If Aang understood her and knew her as well as anti's claim he does, he would have never insinuated that she only was looking fo Yon Rah becasue she wanted revenge (her mother was MURDERED for petes sake), he would've understood that her grief was slowly poisoning her. To be honest, I would go as far as to say he only understands/sees what she's shown him. It’s significant that when we finally learn the story behind the death of her mother, Zuko is who hears it and not Aang. It is significant that besides the scene in season 1 (when she tells him about her death), aang never attempts to genuinley connect wth katara/ ask about it. I'd like to point out that some anti's claim that this isn't something that he needs to discuss with katara and I disagree. The death of Kya is Integral to kataras character development, and her being able to let go and have full closure marks the end of her character arc.
Don't you think it should be a priority for her LIFE LONG partner to be able to connect with her about something that important?? I know alot of anti's brush this off because they're silly, but in REAL LIFE, people get married to others who understand them, care about them, and accept them fully (and I know antis love to pull the “Kataang is an example of a healthy, comfortable relationship” card). Aang can’t do that without bringing morals into question and that begs the question, if he can't cant accept her or listen/understand her at her worst, how can he claim to know her the best? Again, I really disagree with the notion that Aang was “the angel on Kataras shoulder” as the creators put it, because this completely ignores her point of view, making it seem like she’s simply overreacting over something trivial. (The rest is in comments sry 😭).
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