gloomz

[killedbybpd]

[mild-cherry-pepci-deactivated20]

Dormant conversations with friends scare me. A lot.

[softgorerae]

im sorry

Im not saying this is a suicide attempt

but if I dont wake up tomorrow, I want you to know I am sorry I didnt write individual letters. It would of taken too long and i would of started to sob and it would of ruined it all

That Im sorry I ever had to hurt any of you. That the monsters in my head finally strangled what was left of the voice in me.

Know Im at peace now because now they cant hurt me anymore and i cant miss her anymore

I cant be in pain like this the kind not even oxy could try and fix I have been in agony longer then I can remember and maybe I just need some god damn fucking peace and maybe the only way I see it is through kaffan I wish I saw it any other way Im sorryIm so fucking sorry

Im sorry if I die tonight

[arewereallyfine-deactivated2022]

I deserve the pain I’m putting myself trough...

[sexxaesthetics]

you know what’s hot?

open and honest communication, genuine effort to understand someone else’s perspective, love and affection,

[sexxaesthetics]

you know what’s hot?

open and honest communication, genuine effort to understand someone else’s perspective, love and affection,

[okssure]

[xxd1g1tal-suffer1ngxx]

[theirdelusion-deactivated202106]

[tearfulangel]

[lovestruckbpd]

i hate how much i read into how ppl say things and words they choose to the point im overthinking the fuck outta it until im sad cuz their tone was just slightly off or “oh they couldve said it like this to show they care more but they didnt so obviously they dont care” i hate it jfc

[softgorerae]

they're not much but theyre something, along with a few other little gifts im getting laterz i cant wait to give him these!

[softgorerae]

nvm he cancelled on me LOL. doing the Suicide brb

[softgorerae]

they're not much but theyre something, along with a few other little gifts im getting laterz i cant wait to give him these!

[siickangel]

current thoughts 18.06.20

[trauma-rat]

I hate being depressed and having an abusive parent because I know that if I don’t do certain things, and do them to her standard of perfection, I’m going to get In Trouble™, but I don’t have the energy most of the time to do that so I’m basically set up to fail, either from her high expectations or my own poor mental health.

[traumadrauma]

hey y’all wanna talk about a lesser talked about trauma effect?

loss of autonomy.

not knowing how to do anything without explicit permission or instruction.

feeling like you’ll get in trouble if you do anything on your own will.

waiting until you’re given permission to do so much as eat.

not feeling like your body is your own.

if you experience this you aren’t broken or alone. you were abused and traumatized and conditioned to be like this. remember you belong to nobody but yourself. you are and will be okay.

[bpdbxxch]

I don't think people realize how much emotions when you have bpd are HELL. Words can't even describe how much feelings hurt. Feeling emotions to a point where you can't function is exausting. I think that's why people with bpd have such a high suicide rate, because none of us know how to handle this many emotions.