So Long And Thanks For All The Fish

30, she/her

[000l]

[shrewreadings]

like to charge, reblog to cast.

[storybookprincess]

so back when my little brother was in high school, my mom went as a chaperone for their senior year field trip to an amusement park. which, you know, brave move to volunteer to supervise a bunch of high school seniors let loose in a wonderland of rollercoasters and sugar

my brother and his friends in this field trip group were truly great kids. but they were not above run of the mill teenage boy shenanigans. it’s the end of senior year, you and all your buddies are at the amusement park, you’re naturally going to want to act like a complete moron

there was one kid in the group who was especially prone to goofing around. committed to the bit, some may say. my mom knew that if nonsense was going to break out, he’d likely be at the center of it

so she goes up to this kid at the very start of the trip and says “hey, i’m kinda worried about this chaperoning thing. this might be a lot to ask, but can you help me keep an eye on everyone? you wouldn’t have to do anything big, just be an extra set of eyes for me.”

friends, this kid proceeded to run their field trip group like the fucking us marines. everyone is at the meet up spots at the designated time. everyone waits in line for the rides like a bunch of boy scouts. the second the horseplay gets too out of hand, this kid is getting it back under control

it’s incredible how differently people act based on the expectations you set. instead of going to this kid and saying “hey, i know you’re trouble, so i’ve got my eye on you,” my mom went “hey, i know you have influence in your peer group, so i think you can help me.”

treat someone like a problem, they’ll act like a problem. but give people a chance to help, make them feel important, and they usually rise far above the occasion. it was a stroke of genius that i’m honestly still in awe of

[spacedewey]

Call me old fashioned, but I think the president saying "a whole civilization will die tonight" is the part where he should be deposed immediately.

[byjove]

I never thought I would be siding with the pope’s involvement in politics and cheering him on. I will say that.

[byjove]

[capricornluna-deactivated201810]

this blog hates donald trump

[scamguy]

i would like to officially thank sesame for its seeds, its oil, and of course its street

[dunkstein]

I will be 70 years old and I still will never have gotten over the time the Mythbusters used a rocket powered steel wall to - and I use this word as literally as possible - vaporize an entire car into red mist

[dunkstein]

https://youtu.be/Nl8xTqTUGCY

If you haven’t seen this episode of Mythbusters I feel so bad for you because “What car?” remains to this day as a defining moment of my adolescence and my entire life

[theotheristhedoctor]

That was a near-religious experience 

[outburstsoftheordinary]

I made a gif of it for those of you who cant watch the video in your country. Or if you know you just want to stare at it mesmerized like me

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Oh wow they sure did vaporise that car into red mist

[thirdwizard-who]

@identifying-cars-in-posts?

[identifying-cars-in-posts]

1994-1996 Ford Aspire

[polyphonetic]

(formerly)

[adamtheredbeard]

I’m partial to the “Can a Snowplow Split a Car in Two” one. The answer was “No”, so they naturally ramped it up. Which led to this

A rocket powered, sharpened steel wedge slicing a car (with its engine!) in two, right down the middle

[the-most-adorkable-smile]

@identifying-cars-in-posts what’s this one?

[identifying-cars-in-posts]

1988-1989 Honda Civic

[professionalchaoticdumbass]

(formerly)

[patronsaintofmistakenidentity]

"cigarette" implies the existence of a much larger "cigar"

[patronsaintofmistakenidentity]

i recovered by the time i hit post but when i first had this thought i had genuinely forgotten cigars exist

[theconcealedweapon]

[inbabylontheywept]

i am banned from eating my herring inside. they make me eat it on the smoking area by the loading dock, under the theory that it already smells bad there. but it was raining today which was preventing my breakfast, so i was feeling sad and hungry and then i realized that there was a large cardboard box in the dumpster from a previous delivery. like a fridge sized box. so i fished it out of the dumpster, then tipped it on its side and had a nice little cardboard cave to watch the rain and eat my fish in. which was a great experience. very soothing. very zen. at least until the security guard from the day before stepped outside to smoke. then i tried hiding from him by crawling deeper in the box, which unfortunately did not work. instead he saw a sort of damp sniveling pale hairless creature eating fish in a box, and delivered the verbal killshot of "good morning, mr. smeagol." which is how my day was ruined before 8 am.

[depsidase]

[dinosaur-ears]

The Epstein files are not just about pedophilia. Trafficking children for sexual abuse is deeply heinous, so it makes sense that it's captured our attention. But pedophilia is not the point.

The point is that we live with a global network of elites who have enough power to treat politics, laws, public opinion, international treaties, and all other people as personal assets.

The point is that nobody is truly safe or sovereign when a handful of rich assholes have access to this kind of power.

The point is that Epstein being dead and Maxwell being in jail does nothing at all to alter the power structure.

[malcolm-reeds-pineapple]

Sesame Street posting techniques for comforting children during traumatic world events feels so fucking dystopian but here are the slides they posted just in case you or a loved one has any little critters at home right now

No one is doing well right now, but being a little critter right now has got to be terrifying. This is such a crushing series of images, especially considering PBS’s funding got slashed. While I’m happy Sesame Street continues to keep the wellbeing and education of children as a major priority, there’s a certain amount of innocence that Sesame Street represents and this is giving me such a visceral feeling rn

[soracities]

"Absolutely no one comes to save us but us."

Ismatu Gwendolyn, "you've been traumatized into hating reading (and it makes you easier to oppress)", from Threadings, on Substack [ID'd]

[paper-mario-wiki]

HEY wanna read but annoyed on where to find copies of books?

Here's an archive with millions of PDFs of books and papers and magazines and essays and stuff.

[meltedgarment]

I've been looking for such archives, thanks

[fealty-to-thee]

you’ve been traumatized into hating reading (and it makes you easier to oppress).

i was not going to publish this essay because i don’t like to yell but here the fuck i am.

the first link broke, here you go

[creatingblackcharacters]

BEGGING us to read nonfiction every now and then. Like. Words on page. It doesn't have to be the only thing you do, but you gotta keep in practice with it. No easier people to subjugate than those who question nothing they're told.

[aropride]

u used to be able to put a dvd in your computer. and then u could watch it

[sensitivesiren]

[4outof20]

genuine question

[thesecretuncle]

shit Saruman would yell at Gandalf during their wizard battle in that gay tower

[carpenter-sab]

SINNERS (2025) dir. Ryan Coogler

[frottinq]

it really is interesting how most adults really only see child sexual assault through the lens of how it makes THEM feel. it's not really about the actual harm that comes to the children, it's about how they, the adult (the real victim) feels about the fact that a child or children got abused and taken advantage of.

like one time I saw a vid of some dudes who tricked some guys into thinking they were going to meet up with minors, instead they forced the two dudes to fight on camera. it's voyeurism, it's not about protecting children it's about the good feeling YOU, the viewer, get inside when you watch this happen.

or like I was arguing with some people about CSA being punishable by death. i don't care if child abusers die, let me say that. wouldn't care if they all killed themselves to a person. but there is a REASON child advocacy organizations will tell you that executing convicted pedophiles is a bad idea, and that's because it will lead to more children being killed to hide the crimes of the abuser.

But if you argue against THE STATE executing pedophiles, people start pulling the "ohhhh wow defending pedophiles. this the hill you wanna die on?" like no dude I just think about the effects of policy outside of the fucking feel-good yummies in my tummy I get from seeing someone I don't like punished.