"Insert funny title here" @spartanpaladin - Tumblr Blog

"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

xeansicemane

Humans have a really weird mix of mundane superpowers.

We're not fast and don't have a lot of natural weaponry but we're bizarrely tolerant to a broad range of toxins to the point that one toxin is considered a morning necessity for some to perform at work. Gotta love us.

vexwerewolf

natalieironside

The peasants have developed a parasocial attachment to you, my liege

joriontel

They believe you were appointed by God himself, m’ lord!

natalieironside

It's kind of cringe, sire. They're like totally obsessed with you.

alagaisia

Hey. Why isn’t the moon landing a national holiday in the US. Isn’t that fucked up? Does anyone else think that’s absurd?

alagaisia

It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!

alagaisia

It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.

watermelon-converse

Hey. Hey. Tumblr. Ides of March ppl. We can do this

human-south-of-north-pole

MOON LANDING DAY IS THURSDAY!

charlesoberonn

Sumerian Veteran: *has severe PTSD but doesn't know it because the term won't be invented for another 5000 years* I fight the same battle in my dreams every night and my relationship with my family has fallen apart.

Sumerian Healer: *saw hundreds of veterans with the exact same affliction before* You're cursed by desert demons.

mr-elementle

actually we have recorded texts of sumerian warriors describing symptoms that closely match ptsd, and the diagnoses was not desert demons, but rather "Those dudes you killed are still attacking you with their ghosts because you killed them"

slimegirlwarlock

hey can we talk about the fact that during our last battle that strange wizard we let join the party shouted "evil blast!" and then black lightning bursted from their fingertips?

catgirlforeskin

She’s our highest dps right now I don’t really care what kind of blasts she’s firing. She can blast in my mouth next for all I care as long as she’s still carrying

krawkpaladin

Reblogging things I like feels a lot more goblinesque than upvoting ever did. The upvotes felt like "hmm yes, I approve *golf claps*" while reblogging feels like furtively staring at something before shoving it in your mouth and scurrying back underneath the nearest piece of furniture.

Which isn't to say that I don't like it. But I definitely find myself going "maybe I shouldn't reblog this because I've already reblogged a bunch of things today and I don't want to look like I don't have a life," I say as I close the app and reopen it like one of those little automatic box toys with the switches.

fhistle

quasi-normalcy

You might think that I'm joking when I say that we need cyborg rights to be codified into law, but I honestly think that, given the pace of development of medical implants and the rights issues raised by having proprietary technologies becoming part of a human body, I think that this is absolutely essential for bodily autonomy, disability rights, and human rights more generally. This has already become an issue, and it will only become a larger issue moving forwards.

mmeveronica

No but seriously we need cyborg rights, in case you don't know how many people count as cyborgs here are some examples;

People with cochlear implants are cyborgs

People with pacemakers are cyborgs

People with insulin pumps are cyborgs

There are even edge cases revolving around how much electricity and integration into the body are necessary to make someone a cyborg.

People with replacement hips or other bones are by some definitions cyborgs

People with implanted medical devices such as artificial valves or stents are by some definitions cyborgs

People with prosthetic limbs are by some definitions cyborgs

People with ostomy bags are by some definitions cyborgs

People in wheel chairs, electric or not, are by some definitions cyborgs

The list could go on but I think I made my point that cyborgs are a lot more than just people with robot arms, they are the disabled deserving of the rights to the technology their lives literally depend on.

andreathemagpie

This is needed.

Earlier this year, a woman was forcibly deprived of a brain implant that was treating her epilepsy because the company that made the implant went bankrupt. Here's a link to one of several articles about it:

Her life was significantly improved by the device, then she received a termination letter.

i-need-a-good-blog-name

This story happened back in the 2010s according to the first article but is still relevant. Also if my cochlears were repossessed by the company for some asinine reason I would literally stop being able to do 80% of the things I do and my future would be ruined. Cyborg rights are necessary and should have been codified decades ago

elfwreck

These early adopters found out what happened when a cutting-edge marvel became an obsolete gadget... inside their bodies.

This was in 2020, and the patients weren't even informed of it - one day their eyes just stopped working because the company that made them went out of business.

valkoswolf

i want to give a bit of info to everyone who only knows miguel from the movie:

•he is not a vampire! his fangs are from his spider dna and are filled with paralyzing venom :) fun fact: the size of his fangs makes him mumble so other people don't see them while he's talking!

•he wasn't bitten by a spider like most spider people! spider dna was atomically spliced directly into his genes making him 50% spider

•he doesn't stick like other spider people! he uses the talons on his fingers to climb around and such! fun fact: these talons can easily slice through solid metal :)

•he doesn't have a spider sense! instead, all of his senses are majorly enhanced!

•yes! he always moves like that! he automatically moves like a feral monster because that's what he is!

•he has a fiancé named dana and a little brother named gabriel! they are the two most important people in his life :) fun fact: gabriel recognized that it was miguel in the spider suit the first time he saw him in it!

•his eyes are red because they can see in major details and in complete darkness. fun fact: this makes his eyes super sensitive to light, which constantly gives him migraines :)

•yes! his ass is that huge in the comics, too! everyone in the comics are always commenting on it ^^

•miguel is irish/mexican :)

•he is NOT the original spider man of his universe! there was a peter parker in the past before the year 2099

just wanted to clear up some facts about him movie onlys may have misconstrued ^^

sodhya-deactivated20181218

This got me dying

the-bitch-goddess-success-deact

who paid for this study bruh

glitteryheaux

it’‘s literally seasoning. that’s it. that’s what make food taste good.

fuckingrecipes

Bro it’s more complex than just ‘ey they used seasoning’

It’s HOW they used seasoning, compared to other areas of the world.

Indian seasoning does this neat color wheel of flavor, fitting a bunch of spices that are very DIFFERENT from each other, to create a huge range of complex flavor.

Meanwhile in Italy for instance, they tend to use flavors that are SIMILAR. For instance, Basil and Oregano, or Sweet fish with Sweet wine. It makes foods less likely to contrast weirdly in your mouth, and it’s the basis of why fancy european people pair red wines with steak and white wines with chicken. Savory with Savory, Light with Light.

But the Indian food steps it up a notch. The research is definitely worth a read.

“ That like flavors should be combined for better dishes—an unspoken but popular hypothesis stipulated by recipe-building in North American, Western European, and Latin American cultures—is an idea essentially reversed in Indian cuisine. “

kittehinfurs

well yes, spices need to not just complement the food but contrast against each other. to get maximum flavour when cooking indian food:

1. use whole spices, dry roast small quantities of individual spices together and then grind them to a powder. balance is what you’re looking for, not just chucking in handfuls of seasonings willy nilly because quantity does not equal flavour when it comes to spicing indian food.

2. whole spices go in the oil first. always. also everything gets fried on its own before it’s chucked into the sauce/curry. even the curry base is started off by frying onions/ginger/garlic/tomatoes or any combination thereof. basically…FRY THAT SHIT. i don’t know of any regional cuisine in india that uses stock for simmering. frying everything individually is how we add flavour instead.

3. indian food needs to be cooked long and slow for the flavours to really merge. don’t skimp on the cooking time if you can because that makes a huge difference.

thresholdofzero-deactivated2018

This was so enlightening

raina-of-winter-deactivated2025

I feel a need to mention that the researchers for this study are NOT white, as stated above. They’re Indian. It’s Indian people saying “why does our cuisine work and taste so vastly different than anywhere else in the world?” To quote from the article:

“Researchers Anupam Jaina, Rakhi N Kb, and Ganesh Bagler from the Indian Institute for Technology in Jodhpur ran a fine-tooth comb through TarlaDalal.com—a recipe database of more than 17,000 dishes that self-identifies as “India’s #1 food site”—in attempts to decode the magic of your chicken tikka masala or aloo gobi.”

therobotmonster

There’s a major misunderstanding in how a lot of people understand science. There’s this idea that there’s a frontier of stuff we don’t know and a big block of stuff we do. Their first reaction is to scoff because we already “know” that Indian food “uses spices” and that’s why it tastes good. Why waste time re-treading that ground to come to the conclusion you already have?

In reality, the frontiers of knowledge are everywhere. Most of what gets studied is common everyday stuff because we generally have a good grip on what stuff does but the holes are in the “how it does it”. And we don’t know anything to perfect certainty, only degrees of relative certainty, and in varying levels of precision.

The person who says the Earth is flat isn’t making a terribly large miscalculation of the curviture of the Earth, and on a local scale it may not impact their day to day life, but they are still wrong. The person who says the Earth is round is also wrong, but the model is off from reality significantly less. The one who says the planet is an oblate spheroid futher brings the model into precision, but ultiamtely, the only perfect 1:1 model of the planet, is the planet.

Every measurement is going to have a margin of error. Doesn’t mean we should just stop at the sphere, or even the oblate spheroid.

lastvalyrian

I will never forget a book I had as a kid that was basically “scientific answers to everyday phenomena most people cannot explain”. And most of the book was exactly like that. Stuff like why does a plane actually fly or why can’t you cool down the earth by turning up the fridge and air conditioning.

Anyway what always stuck with me from this book is that one of the questions was “why do shower curtains get pulled inwards when you shower” and the chapter listed a couple possible reasons but ended with “but really we cannot fully explain why this happens, probably because nobody gets paid to investigate the behaviour of shower curtains”

amygdalae

Customer came in and ordered a buncha freud and Jordan Peterson books 🤢🤢🤢

amygdalae

munkseel

ayo shoutout to the fucked up incredible hat my irl got my for the bday

soradsauce

christs-cock-deactivated2023110

my friend asked me to pretend to be her boyfriend because her parents are homophobic af but they ended up hating me so much that they were glad when she said she was gay task failed successfully