[Requested !] Kress Twins [Semi-realistic] relationship headcannons: 💜💜
The two of you often play poker together, he cheats every-time and you have yet to figure out how.
His guilty pleasure is watching dramatized political films. He’ll often tell you what’s inaccurate about them, “You see .. that wouldn’t fly in the real world ..”
He’ll often grasp your neck with his hands. He likes to see how delicate you really are.
Any old magazines he finds he insults the advice given in the financial column, “Can you believe what these idiots think saving money is …”
His memory is extremely sharp. It’s scary. Faces are his forte. He’ll bring up points from past arguments to prove his point most times you have a squabble with him. He also is quite fond of describing the faces of his and his sister’s victims.
If you’re upset he’ll sit like a stone wall and listen. Nodding occasionally. He’s not the best with any kind of deep emotion really but he will just let you ramble.
She adores your skin to a creepy degree. She loves mixing you up skin care concoctions to see what works. You either look flawless or you need an emergency room…
She is the first to come to your aid if you’re sick. She loves spoon feeding you the various treatments she makes. You might end up being a different color after but hey atleast you’re well !!
On less chaotic days the two of you will have tea and quietly talk about the other/general gossip
Her guilty pleasure is dramatized medical shows. She loves how messy the drama can get. “My, that would NEVER happen in my lab ..” (She’d LOVE house , TBBT , and greys anatomy TRUST..)
Sometimes she’ll graze your neck with the dull side of a blade.,”I just like to see how your skin bends under it ..”
If you get into an argument you should probably keep your distance.. she has the tendency to throw whatever acid she has on her whenever she’s mad.
They’ll bicker over where you sleep. They ended up pushing three mattresses together long ways. Nightly you swap between sleeping with either one.
You sometimes feel like a third wheel .. iykyk.. 👀
If you’re upset they’ll hurl the most demeaning words at each other if they suspect they were the cause.
They definitely try to get busy with you A LOt. With you being able to help them both at the same time ..
You’ll often be hoisted up onto otto’s shoulder if you can’t keep up with them.., O: “Dearie me ..” A: “Otto, just grab the sack of potatoes and let’s go !”
While they are together, deep down they appreciate how you get to know them separately. It’s what keeps them bonded to you…
Drunkenly they suggested attaching you to them .. thankfully you talked them out of it ..
Sigh …. YOU FREAKS BETTER BE HAPPY ..