Ruby's Debug [B]log

Art, poems, etc by a broke wlwlw cyberpunk transhumanist. 🏳️‍⚧️ We sort by tags. Try #Original Poem, #Pixel Art, #c0222f, etc. No random DMs. Please go through our wife: @slimeheartblue We identify as a level 35 collection of panpsychist shell programs, running on a holographic projection emitted by a magical crystal (also human). All of our jobs were replaced by AI, but we're creating art anyway. Or we'll die trying, I guess?

[starlightdotpink]

Hi. I'm a trans woman and a housewife trying to keep three disabled people alive on a fixed income of $1600/month. Because of this, every dream I ever had is on hold for survival.

Before I ask you for help, I want to tell you about us. First, a little about my family. I have narcolepsy, asd, and failed laminectomy syndrome with severe nerve pain. My partner and editor, @slimeheartblue, has scoliosis and hormonal disruption and PTSD. Her wife and my girlfriend, @thusspokeell has diabetes type 1, heart failure, and seizures.

Things are rough, but we once had dreams — and we are still chasing them. Want to help?

Support Ruby Claris & Friends

Support Ruby Claris & Friends

Back in 2018, the three of us got together with a plan to make games and interactive experiences, but conditions are deteriorating. Due to COVID, illness, and all of the economic and political instability we haven’t been able to follow our dreams. Medical conditions are expensive to treat, and we are barely able to survive right now.

This is where you come in! You can be part of our redemption arc, if you want!

My current goal is to save up for a good microphone like an Audio-Technica AT2020, and begin reading my poetry and songs online. Consider chipping some money our way for equipment and incidentals and I’ll make you a founding member of me, forever.

Right now, I make poetry and pixel art and do technical consultation for free here on the internet. This doesn't pay particularly well. If you enjoy my work, please try to help. I promise to credit you in my future projects as a patron, no matter how large or small your contribution. One love 🤍 https://ko-fi.com/c0222f 🩵 thank you

( this month we are short $360 for our bills and pain medications )

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

"only a poor artisan blames his tools" is such bullshit, in almost every imaginable line of work the quality of the tools you have access to plays a massive role in the quality of the end product, sometimes in excess of the role played by individual skill! For example, some people have to code in javascript

[sundew-vt]

Please do not

[isuggestrespecttranspeople]

Oh my god seriously don’t use duct tape for your genitalia no matter how much it sucks for you to have

[drpepperhateblog]

Padparadscha’s Purpose

Ever since the introduction of Padparadscha, the Sapphire who can’t see the future but instead sees things that have just occurred, there has been speculation about whether she can be useful in some way, or if she is just around for comedy relief.

In fact, Padparadscha doesn’t seem to be able to connect to the present at all.

(I found this gif through another website with no source listed. Do let me know if you know who made this gif so I can give them credit.)

All Sapphires have their eye hidden by their hair, but in Padparadscha’s case, it seems to be more literal than for Garnet’s Sapphire.

So what is Padparadscha’s purpose in the story other than providing us with a laugh every now and then? Surely the writers understand that the Slowpoke meme also gets tiring eventually?

Theories have suggested that Padparadscha might have the ability to see the past, but so far we haven’t seen any indications that it would be the case. 

However, Padparadscha seems to be able to see things that happened beyond what is right in front of us.

When Garnet meets the group, Padparadscha straight up tells her that she predicts Garnet is going to make everyone uncomfortable. Garnet did not see this until Padparadscha pointed it out. Padparadscha could see something that wasn’t clear-cut and obvious- the feeling in the room.

Padparadscha’s abilities become even more clear when she says that Lars is going to push the wrong button. Nobody knew that it was the wrong button. They knew he was pushing a button, but not that it was the wrong one.

I don’t know about the correct terminology for a power like this…

Whatever said ability would be called: it proved to be useful in this episode, and I’m sure it’s going to serve a greater purpose later on, when we least expect it.

[starlightdotpink]

as a Padparadscha, I appreciate you seeing her 🫪

[alcrego]

Extradiegetic, 42.

[lunamonchtuna]

— William Shakespeare, Beatrice to Benedick in Much Ado About Nothing (Act IV, Scene i) (via lunamonchtuna)

[starlightdotpink]

Gardens

I want to greet you with my arms open wide but I'm trapped in my space suit. My guts will spill out if I try to receive you. I wish I could be inside of your mind, or even just see you, see you just fine. But my consciousness doesn't know what it's been through.

Do you?

So I took off my helmet and the December air rushed inside. The moment I felt it my softest part died.

The air crystallized in my lungs, my heart like a diamond, so fake and so precious. In your wake I coughed them up, wrapped in viscera and thought: Memories of memories, of memories I forgot.

You held them in your hand, called them beautiful. Planted them in my hungry garden, beneath our dying star like this is everything we are.

So Bloom.

And the vines erupt from her naked corpse only to choke us both.

Why is the air made of glass now and the Earth a bed of hot coal? When we lay down beside our lovers in the fire do we learn the truth? The one we already know?

I want to greet you In my native language, but our species knows nothing but love mixed with anguish.

I opened my helmet and the aether spilled out of my held-shut jaw like rainbows and starlight and awe, and whatever stirs wanting inside of a dead woman's dreams.

Like it grew beautiful and rotten, both, until it colonized the empty spaces inside of me.

[vexheart]

The fine line between wanting to say so much and knowing that it's better to say nothing.

[ivyvolturra-poetry]

heart vs head: a contrapuntal poem... i wrote this as an experimental piece, and i'm still not used to this style, so do let me know if i can improve!

[airshiplady]

Is this something all non-binary people do?

[radcatcreations]

Forgot to post this the other day, but with that LVL Up Expo is over! Back into the recycling bin I go

[slimeheartblue]

Managed to sell a ladder I couldn't use to a guy who was really happy about it.

And the $60, while it won't fix the sink, will help make sure I don't overdraw before the end of the month.

[slimeheartblue]

I don't talk about it much, but since I suddenly can no longer use my kitchen sink and my dishwasher has been broken for a while, I may as well ask directly:

If anyone has the ability to help at all I have a kofi and GoFundMe.

And I am not bothered if you can't! Millions of reasons why! 💙

Support Cass

Support Cass

My household and I are three disabled people who have been approved for disab… Cass Periwinkle needs your support for Support for Disabled H

[starlightdotpink]

How do you all feel about integrated dissociative systems?

I know in the community we all have different opinions on what to do about our own system. Some consider integration an endpoint.

As a blurry, loosely integrated system, I don't believe integration is the ultimate goal nor "should" be. It's about figuring out how you work. The way I work is intuitive to me, and to others who work in similar ways, so documenting it never felt necessary. Truly, documenting how the system works, to me, provides an accessible interface to the world instead of just to the right kind of people.

This also applies to changing someone else's system. I think you're uniquely you, and should be allowed to go on living how you are.

But this is just my opinion. And everyone has opinions.

As such, and this trait is uncommon so it must be stated plainly, I'm capable of hearing your own opinions on this without judging you or asserting a certain way of existence is correct. I just want to share my thoughts and seek opinions from likewise similar friends.

So if you feel a little bit like me, leave a comment here or reblog with your opinion.

Reblog to let prev know their presence is wanted

[slimeheartblue]

I finally have MRI results for my whole spine.

So my spine is damaged in three separate regions:

neck, middle back, and lower back.

In my neck: two of my vertebrae are slowly sliding forward out of position. One over another. The discs between them have deteriorated and grown bone spurs that are pressing against my spinal cord. This has been getting worse since 2015.

The good news is my spinal cord isn't damaged yet, just being pressed on.

In my middle back: my spine curves sideways 20 degrees (that's scoliosis). Three discs have herniated meaning they've burst out of position and are pressing into the space where my spinal cord runs.

One of them has actually broken apart and a loose piece is just there.

In my lower back: my spine curves the opposite direction from my middle back, so overall my spine makes an S-shape.

At the very bottom, a disc is pressing on a nerve so hard that there's literally no space left around that nerve at all.

I'm not okay but I'm not in immediate danger.

I just finally have proof of what my body has been trying to tell me for a long time.

I haven't cried yet. I mostly feel sick.

[somewordsarebiggerthanothers]