Person With The Personality.

He/Him, Late-Twenties. In love with Sci-Fi/Fantasy World-building and people’s TTRPG Characters. Avatar from Hollow Knight.

[juniper-petunia]

they should make a version of socializing that doesn’t make you feel like you’re still the weird 12 year old kid that doesn’t know why she’s not normal like the other kids

[pandaaamonium14]

How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces? These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place. ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! _______________________________ ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth? WITNESS: July 18th. ATTORNEY: What year? WITNESS: Every year. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you? WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which. ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you? WITNESS: Forty-five years. _________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget.. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ____________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you shitting me? _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Getting laid ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children , right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death.. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess. ___________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral… _________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? ______________________________________ And last: ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No.. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

[skrillcholas-cage]

oh my god these are great

[princemetalthunder]

fuck this is like reading a jokes and not actual quotes

[spicymancer]

Yes, Really!

Huge thanks to Noir for working with me to produce an actual real life Monster Researcher Eclair Plushie!!

Follow this link and you can preorder one for yourself! https://noirclothings.com/products/pre-order-noir-series-089-eclair-plushie

Honestly I don't think I could have even imagined something like this when I started drawing this little goofball years ago!

Thank you all so much for your support!

[rammliedmania]

been wanting to draw bridget for long! the design is soooo cute!!

[comrade-ashenov]

[yumykon]

Rosalina ⭐

[fellming]

skeb

[wyrmicelli]

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

[snowown]

[ace-trainer-alice]

there's a really fun balance when you know someone has a crush on you where you can tease them for having a crush on you without letting them know you know they have a crush on you. this only works because people who have crushes will analyze everything you say but not very well. anyway, i love playing with my food.

[ace-trainer-alice]

Gosh, that's so perfect. Your friend is actually the only one who is engaging with this post correctly. Supersedes my original intent, even. Sorry, I bow to her wisdom here. Tell your friend I hope she's having fun!

[gardenofdelete998]

pillows have stopped having a cold side some time ago

[superdaisypowerhour]

"if i had a time machine i would go back in time and kill hitler"

I would put sea mines around medieval britain. i would give hannibal barca ww2 era heavy artillery and tell him not to stop till he starts seeing gauls. i would give boudica a fucking abrams. i would appear before jesus like an angel and tell him "you gotta stop. not cause theyll kill you, youre fine with that, surprisingly, but because your fanclub is gonna spend about 1500 years making everything worse for everyone, everywhere." I would take a glock back in time and shoot romulus, shoot remus, and shoot that damn dog too just to be safe. i would be on the side of christopher columbus' ship in a scuba suit planting c4 on that bitch like rainbow six siege. i would be waging a one woman campaign of terror across andalusia to prevent the reconquista. i would be getting way out in front of that shit is what im saying,

[kaatokunart]

wuwa summer

[ignsart]

[moment-live]

🤍🖤

Pose referenced from photography by @/Alceleiter on twitter

[arcwarlock]

I keep thinking about that "Final Fantasy is a Homestuck" post because I hate how true it is. Trying to describe this game makes me sound about how trying to describe Homestuck made me sound.

Yes please play this 12 year-old game. Sorry you can't play the first part of it because it was so bad they rebooted the whole thing and dropped a dragon nuke on the planet and caused planetary ecological changes. They will still reference that, sorry. Yes the entire base story is considered okish, please play for a 60 hours to get to the first expansion. It is actually worth it trust me I know it sounds wild, but it will rip your heart out several times. Some of the best writing in the entire game is in an optional job quest storyline where you pick up a greatsword and get asked by your own internal pain why you don't just go mad.

There are bunnies on the moon, the dragons are aliens, you optionally travel through time and space to catch a fish, you have a cook-off and alpaca catching competition to determine a nation's ruler, the guy who basically invented advanced gun technology keeps stealing old advanced weaponry to tinker with and no one is stopping him for some reason, Estinien is there (it makes sense in context), the catholic elves are so messed there are LEVELS to that shit (everyone should do the Scholasticate quests! :D), one of your foes won't fucking stay dead and goes to extreme lengths just to have a punching match with you, depression is a bird, one old tired man just wants a nap but also funded an entire theater company, if you do an option storyline of fights you can find a sentient plush chocobo and his world-ending superweapon bug pal just in the world map, you have an entire WWE cagematch fight series, gundam references!, there's Evangelion crossover!(soon), there's Nier crossover!, the gods of the world form Voltron, a man shackles himself to an ancient database tower to pull you to another world.

I sound like a crazy person but that's not even all of it! It's a major time sink I really don't blame people for not playing it. But if you've at all considered it give it a go, there's a free trial that keeps getting expanded so you can play 5/6 of the 10 year story that just wrapped up for free. You've probably seen the meme.

Give it a shot. This game actually literally saved my life.

And at the end they'll ask was your journey worthwhile? And henceforth you shall walk.

[roscolux]

need to beam this tweet directly into everyone's minds right now

[probablily]

sometimes i agree with a post but i dont like your attitude