Carly

I rarely actually post, I'm just here to see all the neat stuff y'all's doing.

[kelpforestdwellers]

it's that time of year everyone. time for the Best Beef.

i make this for rosh hashanah. got the recipe from a sefardi recipe facebook group. ashamed to say I apparently didn't note down who shared it.

--------------------------------

Silan and Pomegranate Slow Roasted Brisket

1 3.5 - 4 lb brisket

1 cup silan (date syrup)

1/2 cup honey mustard or dijon mustard

6 cloves minced garlic

1/4 cup pomegranate juice

1/2 tsp chili powder (optional)

1 tsp salt

1/2 tsp black pepper

1 tbsp chicken bouillon powder

1/4 cup chicken stock or 1 tbsp chicken bouillon porter dissolved in 1/4 cup water

2 onions, thinly sliced

1 tbsp olive oil

In a plastic bag, add silan, mustard, garlic, pomegranate juice, chili powder, salt, black pepper, and 1 tbsp chicken bouillon powder. Mix around in bag so that it’s combined. Then add brisket to the marinade and remove air and seal. Marinate for at least 2 hours or overnight.

Then, In a big flat pot or skillet, heat the olive oil. Then add the thinly sliced onions and cook until translucent. Then remove half of the onions and set aside into a Pyrex dish that has been sprayed with oil.

Add the brisket to the pot, and reserve the bag with the marinade. Cook brisket with remaining onions for 5 mins on each side, until a slight crust forms. Then remove brisket from pot and place into Pyrex dish.

Add onions from the pot on top so that you have half the onions below the brisket and half on top. Pour remaining marinade over brisket and onions along with 1/4 cup chicken stock. Cover tightly with foil and place in oven on 325 Fahrenheit for 3 hours. Remove and let cool completely either for one hour or overnight before slicing against the grain. Enjoy!

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my notes:

i like to add shredded cabbage and roughly chopped carrots to the onions underneath the brisket. great if you like soft cooked vegetables soaked in the marinade flavors. might need to add some extra liquid so those vegetables cook. you could probably use other vegetables if you're a freak.

i usually use a closer to a 2 lb cut so i roughly halve the recipe and it works well. makes great leftovers too.

lots of side dishes would go great with this but i recommend parboiled rice cooked with chicken bouillon, with added dried cranberries and slivered almonds.

not to over hype it but this is the best thing i eat all year. i refuse to cook it any other time even though it's extremely easy because i want it to stay special.

be warned that during the lengthy cook time, the aroma in your dwelling will make you lose your mind and all your neighbors in a three mile radius will come knock on your door.

[renposter-deactivated20250901]

the biggest secret of life is that you can talk to anyone and if you’re nice to them they’ll like you

[stevebuscemisalad]

I wish there was someone to talk to at three in the morning when I'm feeling like this..

[stegal]

Ha a lélek vándorlásában hiszünk, el kell fogadnunk hogy ha zenészek voltunk, zenészek maradunk akkor is, ha négy lábbal újraszületünk..

[silvormoon]

Translation, via Google Translate:

If we believe in the migration of the soul, we have to accept that if we were musicians, we will remain musicians even if we are reborn with four legs.

[thepioden]

Wolfgang Malamozart over here like damn

[rominaflauers]

As Shinji once said: "I am me, I want to be myself, I want to continue existing in this world. My life is worth living here"

[theotherendcomics]

Patreon

[comicgeekscomicgeek]

I... this... what... what the fuck.

[brbgensokyo]

INTERIOR CROCODILE ALLIGATOR

I DRIVE A CHEVROLET MOVIE 

[momolive]

Creative way of saving camels from getting run over

[dracogotgame]

my favourite things about this video:

1) the amount of time that went into considering this approach, which is a resounding 0.00 seconds

2) the baby's screm - yes it's sad bc the poor lil guy is scared but the way his yells for momma hitch with the guy's running have me lmao ngl

3) the guy either had the incredible good fortune or the foresight to put the baby between himself and momma so he could make a break for it. it was too quick. Too deliberate and almost instinctive. He has done this before.

4) the victory skips and turban twirling.

10/10 but please for the love of god there has to be a better way camels kick people to death

[vrabia]

i feel like we're ignoring an important scientific fact, which is that this guy grabbed, at the minimum, 35 kilograms of terrified baby camel and did a fucking 6-second olympic sprint while being chased by, wikipedia informs me, 300-540 kilograms of angry adult camel.

[silk-and-sword]

the human body is capable of amazing things when it notices that it just picked up something that half a ton worth of pissed off camel would very much like to have back

[fusgia]

hey guys you wanna see a really really bad image of a pelican

YEAH you do. here it is. jesus fucking christ

[todayintokyo]

In 1982, quite by accident, a zookeeper at Izu Shaboten Zoo in Shizuoka Prefecture discovered that capybaras absolutely loved soaking in hot water, and the practice of providing them an onsen, or traditional Japanese hot spring, was born. Source Massimo; video @yu_haradakei.

[coughloop]

MOVE IDIOT

[jellyfish-everywhere]

EVERY BODY KNOWS SHITS FUCKED

[smute]

30 trips around the sun and im still surprised when the days get shorter after a long summer like the nights already feel much cooler now and soon it'll be dark at 4 in the afternoon and i'll go wow man look how dark it is and it's only 4 and come spring ill realize that wow you can actually tell the days are getting longer and warmer isnt that crazy and in the summer i'll be lying in bed at 11 thinking woah it's still not dark out and then in september ill say to myself phew that sure was a long summer you can already tell the days are getting shorter and ill remember this post and maybe ill go look for it and reblog it and dear reader, i for one hope that we both live to see it

[serenityquest]

[hydrangeathief]

you can tell a lot about a persons mental health by their favorite mountain goats song so reblog this and tell me your favorite mountain goats song, mine is currently heel turn 1

[neil-gaiman]

Why Tumblr? Why do you, an actual celebrity, a famous writer, use Tumblr of all websites?

(The actual celebrity and famous writer sits back in his rocking chair, surveys the world of Tumblr, from his porch. He chews meditatively on a straw, and then he says:)

TACAFW: Y'see, I've been here for nigh on twelve years now, which in new-fangled internet years is about four hundred years... yup, I remember when all this wuz just folks trading photos of cats, and I remember when over there, where it's now just waste land, that whole part of town was whut we used to call 'Not safe for work" -- hooey, I don't know where those folks went, when they got driv out of town -- but me, through those twelve years, I've just been in this old rockin' chair on this old porch, and I've seen 'em come and I've seen 'em go... I guess I mus' just' like it here...

[eloisecarles]

[nealashitposts]

I recently found out why my mom would never sleep around me when I was a kid. Like she’d never let herself take naps or sleep if I was awake, ever. Or if she did, she would lock her bedroom door. So when I was 6, I was asleep in my bed in the middle of the night when I hear a loud bang, like a pot being dropped and come out to the living room to see my mom standing by the window, with just a huge pile of spaghetti all over the sill, and a pot on the ground, and I ’m like “Are you gonna eat all that?” And ya’ll she get’s BIG MAD and yells at me and chases me to my room but then a little while later a bunch of cops show up and ask me a bunch of random ass questions about my art? Like this one cop lady keeps asking me to draw dragons for her?! And they seem mad as hell

I didn’t want to get arrested so I just never asked my mom for spaghettis after that. Lesson, learned. Don’t ask mom for spaghettis or she’ll call the damn police on you. 

So I have this memory in my head, and it goes unquestioned until I say it outload for the first time a few months back and as soon as I say the words “When I was six, my mom called the cops on me for asking for spaghettis” My adult logic slams into place and is like “Hang on. Your mother definatly did not call the police on a 6 year old for asking for spaghetti.” 

So obviously that’s not what really went down. I call up my mom to tell her how I remember it and on top of her figuring out why her kid has always been really cagey around spaghettis for the last 3 decades she tells me what really happened. 

So on that night, a man tried to break into our house through the front window. It was just my mom, and her kids so she did what she felt she had too and shot him in the head. He’d been wearing a helmet, which landed on the floor under the window.

Now I just want ya’ll to put yourselves in my moms shoes for a minute here. This woman has just taken a human life. The trauma of that- the instant agony, the panic, the guilt, the fear- all of it hitting her at once, her only solace the knowledge that her children are safe. She protected her daughters. No matter the cost to her soul- her children are safe.

Then she looks up and sees her six year old staring at the inside of this mans head before saying “Are you gonna eat all that?” 

[thedorkdionysia]

[aiweirdness]

Undecided on a new years resolution? Try one of these AI-generated suggestions!

Record every adjective I hear on the radio.

Act like a cabbage for a month.

At 4 o'clock every day I will climb a tree.

Speak only to apples for 24 hours.

Jump in front of a moving tree.

On the day of the first snow paint a canvas red.

Dress in a way that only a ghost could love.

Make pancakes out of grass at midnight each night.

Find old man Winter, hug him and let him know everything will be ok.

Ride out of town holding a pelican.

Under every rock I come across for a month I will write "all power to the rocks".

Every day for a year, at a random time, shout "sausage".

Make a film about the last sock in the world.

Put on a red shirt and scream 'I'M NOT WEARING PANTS!' every time I leave the house.

Throw a party for insects.

Try to convince the dog next door that he is wearing a coat of moonlight.

Every time I press a button I will say 'this is my favorite'.

Search my apartment for secret doors or hidden staircases.

Wear two superman outfits at the same time.

Every time it rains I will stir my tea anti-clockwise.

Every night for a week I will wear a hat lined with lettuce.

I will begin to believe that the trees that I see everyday are my friends.

Every time a bird flies past me I will remember to breathe.

Throw a birthday party for my favorite tree.

I will from now on tell every dog I meet that I am training to be a dragon.

Every time I see a panel van pass me I will dub it a "Slice-a-Wagon."

Crawl on the ceiling like a spider for a month.

Attempt to find peace living with an army of puppets.

Wear a dinosaur costume to every public event I attend.

Go to the beach every day for a week and shout the names of colors into the ocean.

Go on a three-day backpacking trip dressed as a turnip.

Create messages that only the wind can hear by blowing on the blades of grass.

Give a piece of cloud to a complete stranger.

Make a mask out of grass and wear it while I'm sleeping.

I will now treat every worm I see as if it is an old friend.

When I hear a strange noise in an empty room I will assume someone is saying hello to me.

How I generated these