There’s Absinthe In Those Crescent Rolls

Extreme angler, biologist, and explorer Otome blog: @more-like-notome

[suhmokey]

What’s the point of scented body wash if that motherfucker only lasts while you’re in the shower

[succulent-tendril]

im so tired i could sleep a horse

[threedollarsdotcom]

they invented like 1000000 foods by doing some bullshit to milk

[rabbiteclair]

waking up two hours early for my job as a gacha character to put on my three discrete hair ornaments, four layers of clothes, eight-square-inch armor plates affixed to my clothes at random, various ribbons and straps that do nothing but encircle my thighs/upper arms, choker, and multi-layered gloves. however I forget to affix dangling tassles everywhere and am sacked immediately for my carelessness

[hotvampireadjacent]

[utopians]

people aren't even exaggerating indeed is literally like that. walmart attendant $13 an hour, target attendant $13 an hour, AI dick sucker $40 an hour, home depot attendant $13 an hour, guy who designs bullets that can only kill children $160k a year plus benefits, gas station manager $18 an hour

[beargirl2]

[turing-tested]

Sorry am on lsd. Shouldn't have told you 2 eat a sandwich. That is your decision not mine. Sorry

this ask is so awesome. my favorite part is I can't find the other ask they're apologizing for.

[puddox]

[amberautumnfaebrooke]

has anyone noticed recently that it's expensive

[sociallyawkwardrevolution]

times like these really make you appreciate pouring river water in your socks

[cheaphalloweencostume]

i have to butt mog some zoomers

[cheaphalloweencostume]

lo and the spirit compelled me to suffer the zoomers with mine own splendid ass, and to mog the children of men, that they might know the greatness of my hinderparts and thus may know fear🙏🏻

[hollowboobtheory]

one thing you need to know about 2014. is that what does the fox say was playing pretty much everywhere you went. and everybody was just relieved it wasn't blurred lines

[hollowboobtheory]

I canot stress enough that those were the only 2 songs in 2014

[dorfs]

getting overtaken as a pedestrian: people are seriously so caught up with themselves they can’t get somewhere 30 seconds later

overtaking people: come on girls it’s not a statue garden

[witchchild]

[chicken-delight]

i have tested positive for tzatziki

[lovesodeepandwideandwell]

I dislike the violence and unpredictability of the ice dispenser

[more-like-notome]

Letting a horse into ramshackle #myhorse