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Andulka
EXPECTATIONS
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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KIROKAZE

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@theartofmadeline
Cosimo Galluzzi

Kiana Khansmith
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bliss lane
Today's Document
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Game Changer & Make Some Noise
YOU ARE THE REASON
Cosmic Funnies

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izzy's playlists!
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@sweartoyeezus
tbh the most unrealistic thing in harry potter is when mrs weasley in the first book asks “now what’s the platform number?”
like this woman has been going to that school for seven years and then dropped kids off on the same place for nearly ten like why on earth would she forget the platform number
I still have the headcanon that Molly BAMF Weasley saw a scrawny underfed child with an owl who had no idea where he was going and looked lost and confused and was like, “Ah, yep, new son.” but didn’t want to scare him by outright approaching and asking if he needed help so she was just like, “MUGGLES, MUGGLES EVERYWHERE! DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT THE PLATFORM NUMBER TO WIZARD SCHOOL IS? WHAT’S THAT? NINE AND THREE QUARTERS? OH, YES, THAT’S RIGHT. THE PLATFORM NUMBER IS N I N E A N D T H R E E Q U A R T E R S!”
Of course seeing as how Harry isn’t the most observant bloke, she probably ushered her kids past him fifty times as different ones screamed the platform number until they finally got his attention.
With that being said, and I’m extremely sorry for taking over your post:
11:45:
They had just enough time to make it onto the platform, get their trunks loaded, and say their goodbyes. Molly ushered them all along, wishing that she could just Apparate them all onto the train and be done with it. There was too much to do, too much to say, too m—
All at once, she screeched to a halt. Percy crashed into her, causing the twins to snicker.
A tiny boy was being crossly turned away by a security guard. A boy whose ribs poked through his baggy shirt, whose glasses were broken, whose jaw was trembling as he tried to find his way. Well, surely she could be the person to guide him there? And did he…? Yes! He had an owl! He was one of them!
The poor child; he looked so lost.
Where were his parents?
Never mind, never mind. She would see to it that he would get on the train. But she had to be careful. She couldn’t startle him. He’d run off and that would be the end of it. No, no, they had to be crafty.
11:47 AM:
“Packed with Muggles of course,” Molly said loudly, ushering her very confused children past the boy. “What’s the platform number again?”
“Nine and three quarters,” Percy said. “Mother, how could you have forg—?”
It was George who nudged him as he understood what she was doing. She had done it before, after all, and she would do it again.
Unfortunately, it didn’t work.
The boy didn’t seem to notice them.
11:48 AM:
“Packed with Muggles of course,” said Molly again, marching her children past once more. “What’s the platform number?”
“Nine and three quarters,” Fred and George screamed in unison.
And still the boy remained lost.
11:49 AM:
“Mum,” Ron panted, tripping over himself as he ran to keep up with her. “Slow down!”
Molly ignored him as she practically flew past the poor boy. “Packed with Muggles of course! Now, what’s the platform number?”
“Nine and three quarters,” Ron bellowed.
11:50 AM:
Molly honestly didn’t care if her entire family missed the train and she had to set off across the UK herself like a mother leading a flock of ducklings: she was going to help this boy onto the bloody train.
She marched past him with a fiery determination and said, “Packed with Muggles of course!”
The boy looked up.
Yes! Okay, this was it, this was it, this was it. Play it cool. He was following them. Listening. Pretending not to.
They stopped.
“Now,” Molly said. “What’s the platform number?”
“Nine and three quarters,” piped Ginny.
Victory!
The next nine minutes were a whirlwind of chaos but they managed to get the boy through the barrier. At Molly’s insistence, Fred and George popped up and helped him get his trunk into the compartment. She handed Ron an extra sandwich and muttered, “Tell him that everywhere else was full.”
He dutifully nodded.
As the train took off, she waved to her children, including her newest one.
Bristling with pride, she began to head back to the Burrow. There was simply no time to waste. She had a jumper to knit.
If I ever don’t reblog this post - assume I’m dead
Hermione Granger: *comes from muggle world and discovers magic*
Hermione Granger: *witnesses humans transfigure into animals*
Hermione Granger: *time-travels multiple times per day*
Professor Trelawney: “I can prophesize the future.”
Hermione Granger: “Bullshit. That can’t be possible. Fuck you.”
#you gotta draw the line somewhere #you gotta draw the fucking line in the sand dude #you gotta make a statement #you gotta look inside yourself and say #what am i willing to put up with today #not fucking this
anyways hermione is a cutthroat bitch and her demonizing divination is due to the fact that she literally #cannot with emotional forms of magic. quidditch? which requires an emotional partnership of trust with the broom? nope. divination? which requires an emotional openness and willingness to forego logical conclusion at the whims of fate? are u fuckin kidding me. patronuses? which require not just technical skill but also a deep connection with your own emotional core? uhhhhh we’ll just let harry handle that one.
movie!hermione, w/ her advanced emotional intelligence and absolute willingness to meet each and every emotional need the boys have, should have of course been good at emotional magics like divination. shes fucking superwoman. but book!hermione? who destroyed a girls face without mercy because she ratted out the DA? who erased her parents memories so she could fight in a war? who solved dumbledores’ mysteries using ancient runes, an art that is practically the math of magic? book!hermione will destroy you and she will do it armed with the cold hard facts and the cold hard facts alone. book!hermione doesn’t give a shit. instead of getting a regular pet, book!hermione was drawn to a magical cat who is self-serving and intellectual and helped her gather clues rather than serving as an emotional companion. i mean fck.
full offense but hermione is so hardcore and logic-driven and she literally could give a SHIT about ur feelings
@lisapanda
In book 1 when their major plot puzzle is character establishing to set us up for the series, Hermione straight-up explains to Harry that she kicks butt because she has logic (which is apparently rare for wizards) and Harry kicks butt because he has emotional understanding and heart. (Ron is unconscious for this conversation and doesn’t get a speech, but presumably he kicks butt for being the only one of them with an ounce of common fucking sense.)
So this has been stuck in my head ever since I heard it three days ago.
this is the polar opposite of Everybody Knows Shits Fucked
i just laughed for 15 minutes straight
let’s play a game called do i really have a crush on this person or am i just so starved for attention and affection that i’ll invent infatuations
all public school anti-bullying activism is extremely transparent and meaningless
faculty: BULLYING IS BAD!! ZERO TOLERANCE POLICY!! THIS IS A HATE FREE ZONE!!
me: hey this person called me a stupid dyke today
faculty: hmm that’s unfortunate. have you tried perhaps, not being gay?
I feel like everyone is against bullying until they actually look at the kids who are being bullied.
The cheesy anti-bullying tapes that they show in schools feature these skinny straight white neurotypical kids who get picked on for no reason. Usually the insults are something along the lines of “You’re a loser!” or “Get lost, freak.” All the kids watching immediately feel bad for the victim, and think “Aw! She didn’t deserve that!”
Then, ten minutes later, they go pick on some marginalized kid without thinking twice. As an autistic person, I was often this kid. The insults I heard growing up were not “You’re a loser!” or “Get lost, freak.” They were “Don’t let the retard work with us” or “Shouldn’t she be going to the special school?”
The problem is we teach kids that bullying occurs for no other reason other than just to be mean. This could not be further from the truth. Bullying occurs because as a society, we condition kids into hating fat, black, neurodivergent, queer, and disabled people. Kids don’t bully each other just to be mean. They do it because if something’s “wrong” with the person, it’s completely justified.
But of course, we can’t tell kids this kind of stuff. We can’t say, “Hey! Making fun of your gay classmate is bad!”
Because when we do, suddenly the phone calls come pouring in, each with a parent on the other end screaming “You can’t be feeding my son that liberal propaganda!”
Here’s your reminder that relationships are extremely difficult. the delusion that you are going to find that person who you move into a small apartment with and read books all day and cook naked and cuddle with and play footsie under the table with is a gross romanticization of reality.
You’re going to have great times in a relationship. You’re going to go on fun dates and have great sex and hot make out sessions. But you’re also going to fight. You’re going to be in that weird stage where you like them more than they like you or vice versa and that’s going to hurt. You’re going to have to deal with jealousy and insecurity. You will have to deal with boredom in the relationship. You’re going to be too busy for them or accidentally hurt them. And you are going to have to deal with a few break ups before you find that right one.
A relationship is not going to solve all of your problems. It’s not going to suddenly make you happy. It isn’t easy. They are much harder than being single. Relationships are an unbelievable amount of work and effort and compromise and it’s not always going to be perfect. But the effort you put into it is what make it worth it. Because you fought and worked hard for this person and hopefully they did the same for you. So remember that.
How To Validate A Child’s Work Without Swearing and Saying “Lil Dude That’s Fuckin Sick”
florence welch: forest goddess, queen of the fae
hozier: florence's son with a mortal woodcutter, trapped between the mortal realm and the fae realm
lorde: dark entity summoned by victorian occultists
lady gaga: diva possessed by the spirit of a modern art exhibit
beyonce and solange: the sun and the moon
kanye west: protagonist of an epic greek tragedy
lana del rey: met the devil at the crossroads and sucked his dick
carly rae jepsen: a mortal, but we don't deserve her
tiny brain: lord of the flies with girls
bigger brain: lord of the flies wouldn’t work with girls because they’d work together and get off the island
expanding brain: girls and women are capable of violence and cruelty too
galaxy brain: young girls could build an equally hellish micro-society but it would function differently from the original because of differing socialization and men aren’t qualified to write it anyway
Wish u were here kissin me and I was kissin u
is this a miranda cosgrove lyric
date a girl who is a home and an adventure all at once
Date a girl who doubles as a haunted house
what the actual fuck
Men don’t know women can pee
ive been sitting on the toilet for 20 minutes trying to piss but the pee keeps getting lost in my confusing Woman Body
IS THIS WHY MEN THINK WOMEN TAKE LONGER IN THE BATHROOM?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA