Just hanging about here, daydreaming

[penandinkprincess]

significantly i don't think shane would be sneaking mangoes on the reg because even if the reaction isn't severe, it is one element of his physical state that isn't Peak Performance, which I don't think he would find acceptable during the season

I do think (and am charmed by) the idea that end of season/contracts/photoshoots is Mango Time

literally waits ALL year to have his delicious, delicious forbidden treat

and I'm also cracking up imagining 19 year old shane starting this tradition at the end of his first season, in his own home, and doing Youthful Rebellion by having mangoes because his parents aren't there to stop him

[belleandkurtbastian]

The Voyageurs get knocked out of the playoffs, and someone's like "Let's all go out tomorrow to drown our sorrows."

Shane, actively setting his GPS to the nearest supermarket as he's leaving the locker room: "Sorry, I can't make it tomorrow."

Hayden: "... Mango day?"

Shane, nodding gravely: "Mango day."

[penandinkprincess]

AW WAIT I LOVE HAYDEN KNOWING ABOUT MANGO DAY

it's like their second year of being friends, and hayden comes over because they're going to go for a run, and he opens the fridge to get some water and sees a COMICALLY large bowl of mangoes in there and is uuuh?? buddy?? you doing a new diet of just mangoes? and he is TOTALLY playful about it. it's just such a funny number of mangoes to see together.

and shane like. understands this is probably a non-normal way of celebrating the end of the season. he knows he's probably going to get chirped about this, and after a lifetime of being the odd man out at lunch tables and birthday cupcake sharing, he knows what's coming. so he explains that he's a little allergic (not dangerously but like. needs to take some allegra and also just be a little itchy for a couple of days) and yeah it's weird and he knows but-

and hayden does laugh, but he's also just, "you know what man? hell yeah." because shane is so controlled and restrictive of himself so he can play the best hockey possible during the season, so if the man wants to have some itchy mangoes to celebrate a job well done at the end of the season, then hell yeah. live it up, man.

[bucksaiga]

[sweetangelfart]

Post the wedding, shane and ilya change their contact names cause now finally finally they can use their real names.

Their names are stored as thus in each other's phones.

Shanya🤏🥺😘🥰💋💦🍆🍑♥️

Ilyusha 🏒♥️

[foramomentonly]

A friend of a friend used to live next door to an NHL player and said that they tended to pass the house to fellow players when they got traded or left the area, so she just lived next to a rotating cast of professional hockey players and I can't get this out of my head:

Cliff buys Ilya's house off him when Ilya moves to Ottawa -- mostly furnished, because Cliff needs pretty much everything (bad breakup, she kicked him out and somehow got his condo out of it) and what is money to Ilya Fucking Rozanov? As he settles in, Cliff starts to notice little...curiosities. The smart TV is still logged into Roz's YouTube account and the guy watches a LOT of Shane Hollander highlight compilations? And interviews? And shirtless ads? But whatever maybe it's chirping material. But also there's a ton of ginger ale in the fridge and Cliff has literally never seen Roz -- or, like, anyone -- drink the stuff. Well, he's heard Hollander does. He keeps finding more and more random but extremely telling clues like a fucking Hollanov scavenger hunt and by the time Ilya and Shane get outed, Cliff isn't even surprised, he's just glad his best friend isn't a stalker.

I might have written two paragraphs and that might be all there will ever be.

[jemimaland]

when shane is stressed out over something, he kicks in his sleep. almost like he’s having stress dreams about skating and he’s kicking his feet out to try and propel him across the ice.

at first, ilya puts up with it bc he’s big and strong and he’s not gonna be kicked out of his own marital bed goddamn it. plus once he makes the connection between the stress and the kicking he just takes it upon himself to get shane really, really relaxed before he goes to sleep and it pretty much solves the problem.

but ONE NIGHT they have an early flight in the morning, shane is stressed about them not making it in time and he refuses any advances made by ilya to try and relax him, ilya doesn’t want to tell him about the kicking bc that will just stress shane out even more so, when it becomes too much, he does the unthinkable and moves to the spare bedroom. he sets an alarm that’s a little earlier than shane’s so that he can sneak back in before shane wakes up, but it’s not enough.

two hours before they’re supposed to be awake, ilya is woken up by a dark figure standing over his bed, looking down at him creepily. he jumps out of his skin before he realizes that it’s shane, but that doesn’t make it much better, because shane looks MURDEROUS and also kind of like he wants to cry and ilya folds, opening his arms for shane to fall into and holds him for the rest of the night. kicking and all.

it takes a few days for shane to forgive him for that, but ilya is willing to put in the work.

[jimmysownworld]

i love the “hollanov has a crush on carter vaughn” take not necessarily in a “i think they would invite him to watch” way but more in a “ilya would accidentally let it slip while chirping at shane to fluster him that vaughn is at the top of their ‘would’ list and vaughn is a little thrown off and straight so he’s like “are you guys asking?” and ilya laughs and pats his shoulder and assures him “absolutely not, i do not share my shane, we just think you are good looking man, i like that you are pretty and fun and my shane likes that you are serious about hockey and have good grooming habits. is not serious, do not worry vaughny we will not be asking you to witness me and my beautiful husband ever” and vaughn low key is overjoyed about it, his teammates who are around and hear the exchange are sometimes like “that doesnt bother you? you dont find that a bit weird?” but vaugh genuinely is just like “rozanov just called me pretty and fun enough to hang out with and hollander thinks im good at hockey and clean enough for him, you could hand me a nobel peace prize and it wouldnt come close to this achievement” and eventually it gets out to the general public so vaughn is captioning his instagram posts shit like “#1 contender for being the hockey husbands third goes fishing” despite shanes mortification about this getting out and vaughns clear delight with it” way

[penandinkprincess]

IT MADE SENSE AT THE TIME, OKAY

[penandinkprincess]

i'll take "things you're going to feel like a dick for saying in about five seconds," alex

[penandinkprincess]

i'm love them, your honor

[penandinkprincess]

love is stored in the allergy-aware bits <3

[penandinkprincess]

WHO WANTS SHALLERGY FIC

[connorsbackpocket]

Once Ilya and Shane are well into their 60s, retired after building a hockey empire together and cementing their legacy together and their rivalry is just an entertaining prologue to their big, beautiful story, the league creates another player award. Not for an individual, but for a pair. Not a couple necessarily, but two players who work together both on and off the ice to make their corner of the world better.

The award, of course, is the Hollander-Rozanov Trophy, and is referred to as the Hollanov award. For as long as they are able, Shane and Ilya are on the committee that selects the winners and get to announce the winners at the MLH awards in the summer.

[lavenderprose]

Ilya is so lucky that Shane proposed. Ilya would have been a nervous fucking wreck for the entire day beforehand. Wake up in the morning. Look in the mirror. Today's the day. Sob. Breathe. Okay I'm good! Turn around and Shane's hair is all in his face, still asleep on Ilya's pillow. I am NOT good. Cold shower. Breakfast that Ilya does not eat. Morning jog wherein Ilya runs like someone is chasing him. Lunch that Ilya does not eat. Drive out to the cottage. Make Shane pull over because Ilya needs to dry heave on the side of the road. "Baby we don't have to drive out today if you're not feeling well." "NO WE HAVE TO." Get to the cottage. Immediately send Shane on some kind of extended fool's errand. Shane wants to stay because Ilya is SHAKING and he is so worried. "No my love I'm fine it's just the breeze off the lake haha." It's thirty fuckig degrees Celsius. Shane finally gtfo's. Yuna, David, Rose FUCKING Landry all descend to help Ilya set up. Well. Ilya is supposed to be helping but he is standing on the deck fully dissociating. Yuna brings him tea. "Are you going to throw up the tea?" "Yes probably." Yuna takes away the tea. 800 electronic tea lights on the deck. In a parallel Ilya has no way of understanding, he both puts on and takes off a suit. Yuna fixes his curls into the hockey boy quasi-mullet that magnetizes Shane's fingers to Ilya's hair and says, "Oh, you're so handsome!" Ilya cries big fat tears. David tells a story about how his proposal to Yuna almost didn't happen because David went to the hospital for heart palpitations that morning. Thank You David That Does Not Help Even Remotely. Ilya slav squats on the lawn for twenty minutes. Shane's car pulls up in the driveway and everyone hides while Ilya vibrates in the entryway. Shane has no less than thirty grocery bags hanging from his arms, still complaining about why the grocery service cancelled their delivery last minute. Ilya leads Shane and all thirty of his grocery bags onto the deck. Shane is doing his favorite thing (bitching) and his second favorite thing (Follow Ilya) so he doesn't notice his own mother tiptoing behind him collecting the grocery bags he drops like breadcrumbs. There is an Oscar-winning actress hiding under his sofa and Shane does not notice because Ilya takes him on the deck and drops to his knees and Shane is like, "Haha, right now?" and then he sees that Ilya has a look on his face like he's just been told the sun is never coming up again and he has his hands on Shane's knees and he is saying, "Shane. Please?" and Shane puts his hands on his head and says "Oh my God baby what's happening to you" as Ilya melts and melts and then from the depths of the cottage someone who sounds a lot like Shane's very own father is whispering "The ring the ring" and when he looks back down Ilya is fumbling a ring box out of his pocket. The first picture of their proposal is Shane glaring into the middle distance with a hand cradling Ilya's curls like a baby while Ilya ugly sobs into his knee.

[nettlepixie]

biblically accurate ilya rozanov proposal

[urie]

people love to talk about shane being a cumslut while ignoring the ilya is also a cumslut moaning sooo happily around shane's dick during their first hookup and then trying to brush it off as Ohhh i dont mind no worries :) meanwhile hes about .2 seconds from getting hard again if shane doesnt start freaking out. anyway its cumslut4cumslut here let your tops be cumsluts its enrichment for them

[argillaforma]

ilya being in a period of Bad depression and between playing games and going to practice he doesn't really have the energy to do much else and he just kind of collapses when he gets home and he hasn't shaved in days and his hair is unruly and he just feels kinda gross and ugly but doesn't have the energy to do anything about it so shane is like Not On My Watch so he drags ilya into the tub and washes his hair with his special curly shampoo and carefully shaves his face and lathers him in too much body lotion which means he has to stand stark naked in the bathroom for 10 minutes before he can put clothes on and shane tries his best to do his curly hair routine for him he gets the special towel and the curl cream and his eyebrows furrow in concentration as he scrunches ilya's curls to the best of his abilities and ilya sits on the toilet lid with tears in his eyes

[bees-reads]

Much like the rest of the fandom I am obsessed with the nickname Shanebug. Thank you to whoever created it, I love you!

I like to think that Shane was given the nickname by David. When he was a toddler Shane was obsessed with any and every type of bug. He’d make David and Yuna take him in the garden all the time to dig for worms or look at the flowers to see if there were any bees. But his absolute favourite were ladybugs leading David to coin the nickname Shanebug.

Obviously once hockey took over his life Shane kind of forgot about his bug obsession. But once he gets settled living in Ottawa with Ilya he starts to pick it back up.

When Shane and Ilya went round to his parents for dinner he offhandedly mentioned that he was planning on adding some plants to the garden so more insects and bugs would visit. And David goes suddenly silent and starts to get teary.

David: Oh Shanebug is back

Ilya: Shanebug, what is a Shanebug?

This leads to Yuna getting out all Shane’s toddler pictures showcasing him holding a ladybug in his hands, him covered in mud pointing at a worm with the biggest grin on his face and him cross eyed as a butterfly lands on his nose. Ilya’s favourite though is a photo of Shane dressed up as a ladybug for his third birthday, antennas and all, that he gushes over.

Ilya is so besotted by the idea of Shanebug that he orders a gazillion different types of flowers and plants to give his husband the bug haven of his dreams (just as long as there are no spiders).

[grabmybush]

ilya rozanov who’s known to boston as the mysterious fuckboy from russia who chirps like he’s getting paid for it and is crazy good at hockey. one day a teammate is absent from a few games in a row and turns back up to practice with a fucking newborn and they’re all in their hockey gear fawning over this tiny baby. then once everyone’s said hi before practice, the crowd parts and ilyas just stood by the doorway, a literal deer in headlights staring at the bundle of blankets in his teammates arms and-

“do you wanna hold him?”

ilya’s moving forward before he can process the words and everyone’s holding their breath as he gathers the newborn into his arms, pausing to take his gloves off first. it’s a few tense seconds before the baby babbles and shifts slightly before tucking his head into the crook of his arm and swiftly falling to sleep.

ilya looks up to see his whole team stifling grins, “i think we’ve found the new babysitter” and he bites back a chirp because he doesn’t want to wake the baby he’s holding so delicately to his chest.

he’s stuck on the sidelines for the whole practice while he rocks the baby through the slams against walls, waving its little arm towards its dad when it eventually wakes up.

and yeah pictures surface soon after of fucking rozanov staring down at the baby in his arms with the fucking softest eyes and twitter has a field day proving he’s a softie at heart

[russianblush]

ilya is ultimate Dog Parent we know this, he spoils the shit out of Anya and shane has no say on the matter (because he definitely spoils her too) but she is literally Ilya’s daughter and i can imagine the idea of her getting scared during a storm and cuddling with ilya on the couch or bed and he’s just singing a lullaby to her in Russian and shane always gets very quiet to listen and gets the courage to ask what it is he’s singing one night and ilya just so casually telling him it was something irina used to sing to him when he was having trouble sleeping or calming down and shane has listened to him enough that he knows the tune by memory and hums it to ilya one night when he’s had one of his hard days and he just breaks down and sobs and of course anya senses ilya’s distress and will sneak into their bedroom and curl up in ilya’s lap and its always after ilya has calmed down just enough that it starts back up again because he’s surrounded by the two people he loves most and sometimes it is just Too Much

[grabmyboner]

I think shane would just want to be a hole for Ilya to use sometimes like he wouldn’t even want to come himself he just wants to be bent over and have his face pushed into the surface and have ilya fuck him only caring about getting off himself and he’s just groaning like he’s alone and shane is just a toy and shane is just so content with being so so good and so useful for Ilya he’s so pliant and his eyes are glazed over and when ilya comes inside him he tucks himself back in his pants and smooth over shane’s hair and leans down and kisses at his temple and whispers “my perfect hole, just for me hmmm” and shane just nods with his face mushed against whatever he’s bent over and hums a sated yeah all used and filled with cum.

[grabmyboner]

@mybloodstream-caffeine oH OH!

shane just being completely used by blasé ilya that just man handles him and doesn’t even bother getting either of them undressed and not touching shane’s cock a single time just using his mouth, thighs, asshole, to get himself off and cover shane in cum or fill him up with cum and shane just takes it and breathes fast and heavy as Ilya uses him and talks to himself “god this feels so good. needed to stick my dick in something so bad and lucky me you’re just waiting around to be fucked.” but then oh oh one time shane comes just from getting fucked like he’s so so good at doing and ilya just laughs meanly when it happens and fucks himself to his own release as he’s babbling on about how fucking easy shane is.

[shanehollandered]

ilya + his very judgemental eyebrows

[grabmyboner]

when ilya is like 55 he will have his phone font on the largest size possible with his screen brightness all the way up and he will be texting shane SHOW ME UR HOLE while he is in the line at the supermarket and it will traumatise nosy teenagers in line behind him

[grabmyboner]

what’s the point at which shane forces ilya to get glasses do you think . im pitching the manager at wholefoods near their house politely lets shane know when he comes to get some kale that the local teens call ilya the hole guy