he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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$LAYYYTER
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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@sweetdisabled
Have I told y’all about my husband’s Fork Theory? If I did already, pretend I didn’t, I’m an old.
So the Spoon Theory is a fundamental metaphor used often in the chronic pain/chronic illness communities to explain to non-spoonies why life is harder for them. It’s super useful and we use that all the time. But it has a corollary. You know the phrase, “Stick a fork in me, I’m done,” right? Well, Fork Theory is that one has a Fork Limit, that is, you can probably cope okay with one fork stuck in you, maybe two or three, but at some point you will lose your shit if one more fork happens. A fork could range from being hungry or having to pee to getting a new bill or a new diagnosis of illness. There are lots of different sizes of forks, and volume vs. quantity means that the fork limit is not absolute. I might be able to deal with 20 tiny little escargot fork annoyances, such as a hangnail or slightly suboptimal pants, but not even one “you poked my trigger on purpose because you think it’s fun to see me melt down” pitchfork.
This is super relevant for neurodivergent folk. Like, you might be able to deal with your feet being cold or a tag, but not both. Hubby describes the situation as “It may seem weird that I just get up and leave the conversation to go to the bathroom, but you just dumped a new financial burden on me and I already had to pee, and going to the bathroom is the fork I can get rid of the fastest.”
I like this and also I like the low key point that you may be able to cope with bigger forks by finding little ones you can remove quickly. A combination of time, focus, and reduction to small stressors that can allow you to focus on the larger stressor in a constructive way.
i think one of the things i want to start learning in 2018 is how to make clothes. how do you start doing that?
YouTube tutorials! YouTube tutorials are honestly a gift from the heavens, if you’re like me and find in-person sewing classes really stressful. My personal favourite (and by “personal favourite” I mean “she basically singlehandedly taught me to sew) is Annika Victoria, who makes videos showing how to make common/popular clothing items like crop tops and circle skirts and how to replicate overpriced high fashion items. She also has a website with text-based tutorials and other resources.
!!! thank you so much!
you’re very welcome! I went to exactly one (1) in-person sewing class, which was full of cliquish wine moms who scared me, so I was very relieved to find that I could learn from the comfort and privacy of my own home, where only my cats would judge me.
So. Tumblr has completely cleared out a bunch of the lo/lit/a fashion tags :\ plus size lo/lit/a fashion is completely empty, and lo/lit/a fashion has 1 post in it. I really wish tumblr wasn’t like this. tags that are all one word like so like lolitafashion are still up, so if previously youd use spaces in your tags for lo/lit/a, id recommend now tagging things all as one word
between “plus size lolita” and “chronic pain” both getting nuked, i suppose that makes my decision to jump communities much easier. :(
tomorrow i will be looking at doing at least a backup on wordpress. thank you for keeping us in the loop, fattychan. i know you’ve been a major inspiration to me on tumblr, so if you move platforms, definitely let me know as i would love to continue following you!
name aesthetic moodboard: robin’s garden
The future of prosthetics is incredibly stylish
It used to be that prosthetic limbs and style had little to do with one another. Prosthetic limbs have typically had as much style as orthopedic shoes, sheathed in beige fabric to cover the metal and plastic parts within. They lacked originality, they lacked flair and they certainly didn’t reflect the wearer’s personality. Now, that couldn’t further from the truth.
Follow stylemic
Victorian Book Locket
1890/1910
Nature’s pastels | jayflora_designs
Our members get to be among the first to marvel at the tiny treasures that fill “Little Ladies: Victorian Fashion Dolls and the Feminine Ideal.” Members’ Previews for our newest exhibition run tomorrow 11/9 through Saturday 11/10. Members are free and can bring guests for just $10.
Doll’s Dresses, c. 1865–75
(Source)
THREE MANDALIAN PAINTED MESH BAGS, EARLY 20th C.
One having cathedral frame decorated with peacocks, one floral with ball fringe, one having pierced frame. Together with two painted mesh bags having sawtooth hem, one with drops
This is really nice work…….. via Art LOVER
THAT’S how you make lace??
If bras hurt your shoulders and make your pain worse, don’t wear them. If that itchy sweater your grandma gave you aggravates your sensory problems, thank her for it, but don’t wear it. If heels make your feet ache or make your dysautonomia flare, wear flats to parties. You shouldn’t follow any social conventions that make your symptoms worse, let alone ones related to something as insignifcant as the clothing you put on your body.
(Source)
I need some of these.
(an image of a hand holding a small business card. The card says: “Health Concerns, Quick Answers to to common questions: Yes we’ve tried that. No, that didn’t help. We’ve been tested for that. We have a very, very good doctor. There isn’t a cure. Sorry. Thank you. We’re well-versed in this matter.”)
My dad found me a disability activism pin from the 70s…aaaand I love it.
Fairy Crowns
Just As Strange As I Am on Etsy
See our #Etsy or #Crowns tags
omfg, cicadas are my jam, and these wing crowns are interesting ephemeral looking accessories.