Bystander Effect - Batkid ages (+adoption status cause I can)
Ok, so i had to do some manvering to figure out how to do the kids ages while also having the members of the batfam i want.
Lets start with Dick. In the fic, the man is like either between the age of 19-21 or 24-25, im still up in the air about him. I want him to have a good age gap between him and tim, soley so there is a middle child energy for jason. He was never adopted while still a minor but has been talking to Bruce about adult adoption. still up in the air for them.
Speaking of Jason, in this, i want him to be around the same age as Jazz but like a year or so ish ounger. Jazz is going to be 20, so most likely 19ish here. he died around 15-16, before he learned to properly drive a car (boy def new how to drive the batmolie at like 13 when, in my timeline, he gets adoptive. He came back from the dead a few months after his death, got picked up by talia, and dunked in the Pit. Came back to Gotham around age 17-18.
Tim is 14-15 years old, so in the middle of being Robin. I like to think he's been robin for a little over a two years and is the start of Bruce getting better mentally. Yes, he helped pull Bruce out of his depression, but thats a lot to put on a 12-13 year old. Alfred and Dick helped because dick got his head out of his ass to help deal with their mutual grief at jason's death. Tim is a ward of Bruce, not adopted cause his dad is alive, mom dead, but dad in in coma (imma not waking him up)
Cass is only around 12 here, but she is actually activally going out as Black Bat with Batman and Robin, however she's still new and Batman hasn't introduced her to the Young Justice Team just yet. If i was in his shoes, I wouldn't get her to join the team untill around 13-14 like tim and dick were when they joined up. So about a year or soonier if she can convince Bruce. She is def adopted, she would have pulled the paper work out herself if bruce hadn't.
Duke is about 10 here. His parents get jokerized around the age of 7-8, and ends up being taken in as a foster by bruce around 9, and hasn't develpted his powers yet, so the "no meta" rule is still kinda in effect.
Damian is 5 in this fic, as of now. to answer a question someone had in my comments on ao3, Jason is actually the one to drop off Damian in this au. But also, Damian wasn't five when he got dropped off, he was around 2ish, so he wasn't fully LoA trained when he got to Gotham. He still is a brat, thinks he better than everyone, but he isn't trained fully yet. He is very close to Jason since he has known since basically birth. One of his earliest memories is Jason reading him to sleep.
I can go over the Fenton sibs and team phantom (and ellie) in another post, if i get around to it lol. Not sure if all this is really fleshed out. I'm thinking of making a one shot on jason and damian getting to gotham and make my fic a series. idk.
I might made a prompts list of stuff ive had ideas for and maybe just ask yall what you want to see, but thats a later me problem.
(theyre more like found family not romantic partners tho)
Shredder/ Oroku Saki (old as dirt) as Douglas Abott
Leo (16) as Wendy
Raph (13) as Tommy (could change)
Jennika (adult idk what age // yeah i know shes not a part of 2012 but shjh) as Aimee Eden
Splinter (deceased lmfao) as Pubba (Richard Fox)
Tan Shen as Birdie
and thats as far as ive gotten
Few things i have changed, Both Hamato Yoshi and Tan Shen were scientists who worked together and eventually fell in love and started a family their oldest Miwa, second oldest Donatello, Middle child Leonardo, second youngest Raphael and youngest Michelangelo. Yoshi had always known Martial Arts and taught his children when they were old enough to learn. Yoshi and Shen being home mutagen that is highly dangerous bc they dont know shit abt it yet. Donnie having a love for science and wanting to impress his mom takes it upon himself to go and investigate it which prompts his siblings to want to check it out too. Raph having an obsession with turtles brings his pet to come watch and Mikey crawls in (hes around 1-2 ish at the time). The mutagen spills mutating all the brothers but in different ways: Donnie only gets a turtle shell with all his other features being relatively human like, Raph gets mutated into a half turtle half human hybrid (like regular 2012 raph), Leo has turtle like limbs with the rest of his torso and head being human like, and mikey gets mutated into a half human half turtle hybrid like raph since he was exposed to it super young. Miwa finds them and calls for her parents who at first freak out and then try to find the cause of the mutation to turn their children back. (I havent fleshed out what the virus would be but lets just say the kraang had something to do with it) Then the government starts freaking out about the virus which causes chaos and once they find the mutated brothers they arrest tan shen and Don, Raph, and Leo leaving Miwa alone because shes human. Yoshi is in his lab monitoring Mikey because hes still a baby and just got mutated. Once he catches wind of the arrests he flees into the woods with mikey thinking that Miwa is safe. She wasnt and she and donnie were separated from their mother, raph and leo (who escaped). Oroku Saki being the person people go to for answers sees the potential in Donnies smarts and Miwas skills and decides to keep Donnie alive because of it having his partial mutation be a manipulation point for him and giving him to a wealthy and smart family where he can continue to advance in his studies (the o’neils) while oroku trains Miwa. After a few years of training under oroku miwa and her girlfriend Harmony escape and decided to form their own pack of children who lost their parents the foot clan and train them in martial arts they were taught. Both change their names Miwa becomes Karai and Harmony becomes Shinigami
During the shake down Casey Jones’ younger sister was born her being a hybrid (plot hole i will patch up later) which causes him to freak out
Back with Mikey and Yoshi, Yoshi changes his name to splinter as to not associate himself with his scientific discovery gone wrong and trains mikey for 10 years of his life also telling him stories of how life was and his family before all this happened until Casey finds Mikey and Splinter (dead), Mikey who has grown up with the sense that there was more to the world than what splinter told him wants to go and see for himself and find his family. Casey having a soft spot for hybrids agrees and together they travel
thats as much as im going to write bc its two am and i have school in four hours
rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!
1. a helping hand - buckytony, mcu, established relationship, 1k, K+
Bucky wants to shave his beard. Tony helps.
i really enjoy the intimacy involved in acts of service, and there’s always something so small and treasured about shaving,,,the trust involved in letting someone that close to your face with a knife, the intimacy in being no more than a couple of breaths away from each other, the faith that the other person won’t fuck up your face by giving you a weird shave -- i just love the layers to shaving someone else,,,and i just had to make it buckytony. this is a really short fic (as most of my fics are) but i really love it
2. broken pieces (me and you) fit together perfectly - samrhodey, mcu, developing relationship, post IW, 1.5k, K+
After Thanos, after the Snap, after Sam loses everything familiar, he finds Jim.
//
AU-gust Day 5: Post Apocalyptic AU
i really enjoy samrhodey, i really enjoy the idea of Rhodey only being a couple year’s ahead of Sam and Sam having a big crush on him, i really like the idea of both of them bonding when they join the Avengers post AoU, i really like the idea of this simple, easy relationship developing between them in this very soft and understated way, but ive never actually written them before this fic - which is why im so proud of this fic, because i like the story ive weaved here
Thor Odinson, Crown Prince of the Realm of Asgard, Brother of Loki the Silvertongue, son to Frigga the Kind and Odin the Great, was known for a great many things.
He was known for his great looming stature, stranding tall and proud even for an Asgardian, with muscles that rippled and tensed as he walked. He was known for his illustrious hair, a thick blond mane that he'd taken a vow to never cut, braided and cascading down his shoulders in thick waves. He was known for his might on the battlefield, for the terror he struck through the heart of his enemies when he called lighting itself down to rain fire on those who dared oppose him.
He was known for being a gentle prince, for always having an ear open and the time for a pitcher of ale. He was known for the bond he had with his brother Loki - how the two of them had curled around each other at birth, his tiny fist clenched around his brother's equally tiny pinky, and never let go.
But more than any of that, Thor Odinson was known for never taking a Consort, in all his years.
//
AU-gust Day 9: Royalty AU
Ostensibly, this is a thortony fic, but i really like this fic because of the relationship i wrote for Thor and Loki. i do hope to continue this some day, to expand this verse into a couple of related one shots that show Thor and Tony’s relationship overtime, and develop more on Thor and Loki as brothers because i think we were really robbed of that in the mcu - but this is one of my better AU-gust fills, for sure
4. the things we tell ourselves in the dark - stevetony, emh, skrulls, angst, 1.1k, K
“Still,” he turns away from Tony, because he doesn’t want to hurt him, but if he doesn’t get this out, it might eat him alive, “I was with them for months Tony. Months. How did you not notice? How did you not know it wasn't me?”
this is one of the few stevetony fics ive written all year, because ive sort of fallen out of love with the ship but emh brought it back in full force. i wrote this entire fic in 20 minutes literally the second i finished the Secret Invasion episode because there was such delicious angst and it begged to be written, and im so happy with how this turned out. i personally, am always quite worried that characters sometimes sound OOC in my fics, but i definitely didn’t have that issue with this fic, and i just really enjoyed writing it
On the 10th of December 1991, the Asset is taken out of cyro, and there is a name on his right wrist.
On the 16th of December 1991, he is sent out to shoot the tyre of a car, and then kill the man and woman inside.
When he returns to base, there is a boy, no older than 17, chained to the wall of his room, shivering and bravely fighting back tears.
It does not occur to the Asset until much later than these two events are connected.
//
AU-gust Day 3: Soulmates AU
this is currently my largest fic till date, and it is such a labour of love. i don’t think ive ever worked this hard, or this long on a fic, and it’s definitely the fic i am the most proud of from 2020. im having so much fun writing this, and im really hoping that everybody reading this is really enjoying it too because i have so many ideas for this verse and it’s possibly one of my favourite things ive written ever -- not just this year
+
Bonus: the morning after - mcdanno, hawaii 5 o, established relationship, 1k, T
“I know I say this a lot,” Danny’s voice is still gruff with sleep, and he peers at Steve with one eye, as if opening both is too bright for him. He’s half twisted so he can face Steve, and the show of flexibility isn’t helping with Steve’s mission to keep things PG-13, “but today - you are literally a pain in my ass.”
i very recently got into hawaii 5 o, but i truly love these idiots with all my heart and soul, and it’s been so long since i immersed myself in a new fandom or wrote for any other characters, so i wanted to celebrate that by choosing my favourite h5o fic from this year. the thing about mcdanno is that they really do write themselves, and there’s so much potential with them that a lot of what i write is stuff you can truly imagine just happens off screen on the show. anyway, Danny is always calling Steve a pain in his ass, and i just thought it would be funny if Steve was literally a pain in this ass, and then this small one shot happened
//
those are my top 5 fanworks of 2020!! tagging @deathsweetqueen, @diazalex, @rhodee, @aleator, @starklysteve and as always, anybody else who feels like doing this!!
Haha yup, three. Sounds legit.
I also wandered off to try if I can art! No worries, I gave that up :D
Mad respect to all Artists, arting is exhausting and the progress is too slow for me.
If you really want to check out my attempts, here’s what made its way onto AO3:
Dont Blink! for LCDrarry, it includes the Angels from Doctor Who and was a pain in the arse.
If you knew... was made for H/D Wireless and has the armiest arm i ever saw, very proud of that one. Its also the last thing I made.
Home Sweet Home was also made for H/D Wireless, and the first bigger art piece I tried my hand on.
A muffled groan which is rather explicit and I entirely forgot about making it :D it has a ficlet going with it too.
(I think theres other Art stuff here with the tag #gnarf draws or something)
I reached my yearly goal of writing 100k words once again!
Fics and Ficlets I wrote this year: 20(ish)
Better Side of the Bed (Lock Down Fest, T, 2k)
It was all Malfoy's fault. Harry could be at the Burrow right now, but instead he was trapped in Malfoy's tiny flat. All because that dick couldn't stop bothering him about a stupid life debt he didn't even care about.
Doing What's Best (G, ~800 words)
Lucius looked down at the little bundle currently sleeping in Narcissa's arms and felt terror shoot through his body.
A little boy, his hair so white it was nearly invisible. Born only a few hours ago, taking his first breath in the light of the rising sun.
Narcissa had whispered a welcome, her eyes wet, her smile bigger than ever.
But they both knew, even though temporarily safe, he really wasn't.
Draco was born into a world ruled by war. If only it'd end soon.
I better be hallucinating this (T, 3.8k)
After the war Draco Malfoy is sentenced to Azkaban for a really long sentence. Apparently aiding in Dumbledore's death overrules any argument Harry could put up for him.
After the trial, as the days pass by, Harry is more and more outraged at the sentence.
He can't stop obsessing over the fact that Draco Malfoy saved his life and aided him during the war and is very much capable of redemption. Not to mention that Malfoy has always been a delicate git and would never survive Azkaban.
After a few weeks obsessing Harry decides that Malfoy indeed can't remain unjustly in Azkaban and starts to plot a way to break him out of jail and hide him in Grimmauld Place.
When Hermione finds out she's not amused. Ron is horrified. Draco still thinks he's hallucinating.
Keep Holding On (Wireless, M. 33.333) A collab with @maesterchill who surprised me with lovely art for it!
After the Battle of Hogwarts, Harry and Draco both fall into their own battles with their mental states. Draco is sent to Azkaban, and Harry turns to drinking, hoping to forget.
Months later, Harry visits St Mungo’s new ward on the request of a friend, only to find Draco in a deep vegetative state.
Not willing to give him up, Harry stays by his side, while simultaneously dealing with the Ministry's newest grand idea to make everything worse.
Making new allies, and losing old ones along the way, will hopefully be worth it in the end.
Age is just a number (Fluff Fest, T, 1.5k)
Married for decades, their life is perfect.
Until Harry gets a call and hears the following words:
"Mr Potter, we caught your husband stealing ten large packs of King Sized condoms."
There was still hope (Hurt Fest, M, 3.1k)
Draco winced as pain shot through his leg with every step. This secret, back-alley laboratory had been his last chance, last hope, to find the potion. But nobody had it in stock, and there was no time left to brew it himself.
Panic was slowly overtaking his entire mind as he crept out of the store and back to the nearest alley to Apparate back home.
He already felt off, and it was still early in the day. Of course this thestral-shit had to happen to him, of all people. As if life wasn't bad enough for him already.
Desire (E, 1.7k)
"Auror Potter, what a pleasant surprise to meet you here. What can I do for you?"
"Stop the show, Malfoy. There's no one around, and I'm not here as an Auror."
Draco watched Potter move closer until they were nearly nose to nose, only the small counter of his shop kept Potter at distance.
Potter's eyes were dark with something Draco couldn't exactly name, his face was flushed and the air surrounding him felt somehow static. Draco felt the urge to lean further over his counter, to drink in his sight, to touch the man on the other side—but he didn't.
Drarropoly 2020 currently holds 7 ficlets and is in a Series. The highest rating is Mature and its 3.2k in total at this point.
Let's not wait for France (Fan Fair, T, 17.7k)
All Harry had wanted from his Eighth year at Hogwarts was a little peace and a little privacy but, from the moment that he stepped onto Platform 9 3/4, it was obvious that nothing was ever going to be that easy.
An accidental bond with Malfoy that resulted in them having to stay together at all times was the final straw.
Things couldn't be worse. So much to a quiet year in Hogwarts.
Love letters for the oblivious (Mini Wireless, T, 716 words)
Draco had gotten the strangest letters all week long, which wasn't what anyone needed at Christmas. Especially not him.
Either someone was taking the piss, or he had a very dumb and inefficient secret admirer. And Draco didn't know which would be worse.
Double-Booked (Mini Wireless, T, 2.1k)
Finally, peace and quiet, and—
"Malfoy?!?"
Or the one where Harry thought he could enjoy a quiet Christmas far from everyone, just to find out that the cabin he had booked already accommodated another guest.
The best Christmas he ever had (Mini WirelessT, 1.9k)
Christmas had never been less appealing to him than this year.
That was until Arthur Weasley showed up at his door, dressed as Santa, inviting him to the Burrow.
Anon Fests to be added
Whoever made it to this point: yoooo! Friend! Lots of love to you!
I also got tagged in many get to know me posts, plenty of love in my Inbox giving me love slaps left and right (honestly, im bruised, stop slapping me), amazing person awards, top 5 fics, and whatever you can think of.
To make up for not answering most of them because I’m a horrible person:
My favourite colour: purple
My age: I’ll be 30 next year in April, I expect gifts, I don’t accept first borns
My favourite trope: eight year
My favourite animal: cat
My favourite ice cream: Ben and Jerry’s Cookie Dough
Here’s my writing Playlist, it’s the worst you’ll ever see, and yes, I use YouTube, I’m old.
Other things that happened in 2020 that made me happy:
I kicked out my mentally/emotionally abusive partner of 7 years in January
I kept my grandma alive through this *waves hand at world*
I was able to share my birthday cake with my family becaus I got to leave my first quarantine a few days before my birthday
I got to keep my job
I found a lot of lovely friends in this fandom, and got to keep them through this year
My cats are their usual little jerks and actually enjoyed me being at home due to the raging pandemic
I finally cut off my hair
I’m about to hit 3.5k followers here and I love you all
I’m also tagging everyone who sees this and wants to do something similiar! Show us what you did in 2020, the things you’re proud of, and the things you loved! Let’s spread some happy for the end of the year 💜🥰
request: male!reader, who is Tommy's assistant, is pretty sure he's straight. but he ends up falling for one of the shelby brothers (your choice!). insert gay crisis, and potentially tommy/aunt polly/ada being supportive?
w/c: 1,363
a/n: i love this headcannon so much thank you. i know i do finn for everything but i thought this would work the best and also i love him so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ note that john is alive because im in deep denial. i know i went for a heavier take on this than i could have, but i think it works. also yes i ripped that scene right out of the DA movie. i hope i did the mlm a good. #wlwmlmsolidarity
this is 1928 ish so finn is 20 and so is the reader
this is very obviously way more fully formed than any of my other fics but its tuesday and i have nothing to do so
Ada Thorne had always looked out for you. So when she managed to get you a job working for her brother, you knew you would be safe. Now you hurried up the steps and knocked on a large heavy wooden door, which opened presently to a sitting room where you awaited your new boss.
Ada held the phone to her ear.
“Listen,” she said. “I have a lad who needs a safe place to work. He’s smart and capable and before you say anything, no, he’s not a spy.”
Tommy silently acknowledged the last part with approval. “Ok, but protection from what?”
Ada looked over her shoulder, making sure none of the others in the house were about. She sighed, “I know this means little to you, but he -lets put it this way- doesn’t fancy the ladies. And life is hard enough for people like him without having to worry about being kicked out of work for something that’s no one’s goddamn business.”
“As you said, this lad’s private life is moot to me, but if you can vouch for his work ethic and loyalty, i’ll give him a try.”
“You must be (y/f/n), nice to meet you.” Tommy shook your hand and led you into his office.
“My sister talks very highly of you, and she is quite possibly the only honest person i know.” He offered you a chair and lit himself a cigarette.
“So, the job is simple enough. I need an assistant, the most recent of which, is my wife, who can’t very well be working for me anymore.”
You smiled and nodded.
“Well I have two years of university to my name so I hope I can be useful.”
Tommy chuckled, “Well you are more qualified than any other man here lad, and it’s probably smart to get some new young blood on the company.”
You smiled, “Thank you sir.”
He motioned you to follow him out of the room and into a smaller one just off it.
“This is your office, across the hall-” He motioned behind him through the door, where directly adjacent was another room, “-Is my cousin Michael’s office, he is the account handler so to speak.”
“Now,” He turned back to you, “There is the matter of this.”
He placed a pistol and a handful of ammunition onto the desk between you.
“You know how to shoot son?’
You looked concernedly at the weapon casually lying on the table,
“No sir.”
“Well, hopefully you wont ever need to use this but it seems to be company policy, never can be too careful. I’ll have someone teach you.”
You thanked him and placed the items in a desk drawer.
“If you’ll follow me, i’ll give you the rundown of the company,” he said. “I’ve got some time and I need to wrangle up some people.”
You followed him out the door and through a series of buildings where different operations took place. At one point, you walked into a sort of yard-warehouse area.
Beginning from a distance and gradually growing louder, you could hear ‘duck!’ ‘hit!’ ‘shift!’ etc..
All was explained when you and Tommy turned the corner.
In a roped off section of the cement yard were two very handsome young men. Both boxing and both, seemingly to vex you on your first day, shirtless.
“That’s Bonnie and Finn, don’t mind them.” Tommy commented off-hand.
He turned left and walked into another building, leaving you just enough time to glance back at the two shirtless men, before ducking in after him.
After Tommy had introduced you the Charlie and Curly, he led you back to the office and then said he had to run, and you could start filing the stack of papers on his desk.
You went right to work, and before long, had forgotten the time completely.
~~~~
You were in a filing induced trance when a noise took you out of it.
The noise turned out to be the door opening.
“Oh hi.. i didn’t know anyone was in here..” The boy stammered.
You looked up to see on of the boys from the boxing ring, taken slightly by surprise, you fumbled out from behind the desk to introduce yourself.
“Sorry to surprise you, hi i’m (y/n), Mr. Shelby’s new assistant.” You held out your hand and he shook it.
“I’m Finn,” he stumbled “Tommy’s brother.” he released your hand.
“Can I help you with anything?” You asked, tilting your head.
“Well I thought I’d find my brother here but i guess i’ll see him later.”
In a hasty fashion he held up a hand as a brief farewell, and scurried out of the room.
You sighed and cursed silently to yourself.
Out of all the people he could have been, why my boss’s brother.
~~~~
Like no time at all, the weeks and months seemingly flew past. You had become acquainted with everyone and felt like you had finally found your place. There were, of course, still some aspects with which you couldn’t fit in just the same as any other.
“Oi, you’re a good looking lad! Why don’t you come along with us tonight. Get some drink and find a girl, Birmingham’s best!” Arthur wheezed.
“That’s not saying much, but do come along mate!” John followed up. Giving you a friendly slap on the back.
You smiled,
“Thanks,” You gave john a man-pat on the shoulder, “But i got some work to finish here.”
“Suit yerself.” And they were gone.
You sighed with relief. You knew you’d have to go someday, but right now you couldn’t handle the idea of,,,that.
A few minutes later ,you heard a knock on the door and Finn entered, holding two crystal glasses and a bottle of whiskey.
“i heard you skipped goin’ to the Garrison with the others so i thought i’d bring some to you.”
He placed the things down on your desk and sat on the chair opposite you.
“You’re a life-saver! thank you.” you exclaimed.
Finn chuckled, pouring you a glass and handing it over,
“Yeah, it’s not really my scene either.”
You hummed, taking a sip and savoring it quickly in your mouth. You wondered, a stupid thing to do, if it wasn’t his scene for the same reasons as you. Though the more you got to know him. You suspected.
Suspicions are a dangerous thing. Especially ones that are led by the heart, and are ever so biased on your own happiness. Nevertheless, a week or so later from that night, you popped in to tell Finn, with perhaps too much certainty,
“You know, I think I know a place you might enjoy.”
~~~~
London always induced a joyous feeling inside you. Not that you had only fond memories from living there -far from it- but there was something about a city where the air wasn’t 80% coal soot.
You and Finn got off the train and made your way to Ada’s house. It was always a delight to be in her presence. Especially because you owed her so much, in fact, probably you owed her your life in so may ways.
After tea, and insisting that you had to make your way to a surprise spot, you and Finn made your way into the night.
Through a maze of mews and side-streets, down alleys and cracks you led him.
“I know i grew up in small heath,” He said at one point, when you were in a particularly funky alley. “but where the hell are you taking me?”
“Trust me.” you assured him.
You both came out of an alley and into a small courtyard-like space. You brushed off your clothes a little and knocked on a door in the dark brick wall.
A little notch opened up and you whispered the password. the door swung open.
“Hello Love!” The doorman said, “ ‘aven’t seen you ‘round here for a long time!”
You greeted the man back and made apologies. Presently, you went inside, leading Finn behind you.
Inside was an immaculate ballroom filled with people. Jazz music was pouring from the stage at the far end of the room. But as Finn looked around more, he started thinking that something was off.
When he realized he froze.
All the people dancing, all the paired up couples, were men. Some dressed lavishly and others in plain working clothes. some with curled mustaches and some with cheeks of rouge and powdered skin.
Finn couldn’t believe his eyes.
He saw for the first time, a pair of men dancing hand in hand with wild smiles on their faces. Laughing, singing along.
Finn couldn’t move, nor could he take his eyes off the sights around him.
He felt your presence next to him,
“Was i right to bring you here?” You asked.
He turned his head to face you, he was quivering. He looked you in the eyes, eyes that were lined with tears.
“I had no idea,” He whispered,
“I had no idea there were others.”
Your heart ached for him in a way that only those like them know. You knew what he felt, the wonder, the pain, the confused elation.
You took his hand,
“There are.”
You slowly pulled him to the dance floor.
The music had gotten slower, and the dancing changed to a sort of swaying four-step.
You took his other hand first, letting him go at his own pace, but soon you were as close as the others on the floor. both of you had a hand on the others waist.
Finn looked around again, at all the other people, eyes all closed and heads close. He turned back to you and moved even closer. He brought his lips up to your ear,
“Thank you.” He whispered. He kept his cheek at yours, you felt his hands on your back.
He moved his head slowly so he could look at you again, it was such that your foreheads touched. Your heart beat slow, but hard. You whispered
“Can i kiss you?”
His eyes flicked up to yours before looking down again and moving his lips to yours.
It was ever so soft, barely even there. But it was there, and that was beyond anything Finn had ever felt or imagined before. He closed his eyes and kissed harder this time, and from beneath his eyelids came small lines of tears. The release of an unseen, unknown burden that he had carried for so long.
All you felt was warmth. And the ballroom surrounding you disappeared. You were on a different plane of being, the jazz music still crooned, muffled.
All there was was him, and for him all there was was you.
~~~~
Epilogue
Finn stood outside the opaque glass of the door. And in the irony of psychology, he had never felt more confident about what he was going to do.
He opened the door to Tommy’s office.
“Hello Finn.” He said from behind the desk, cigarette smoking from his lip.
Finn went right up and took a seat across from his brother.
“I’m a homosexual.” He declared, his gaze unwavering despite the magnanimity of his previous statement.
Tommy took the cigarette from between his lips and put it out.
“Well then.” He reached over and grabbed a bottle of whiskey, pouring two glasses and sliding one over to Finn. He took a sip.
“Why are you telling me now?”
“Because I’m in love with (y/n).” He replied casually, taking himself a swig.
Tommy raised his brow, but made no other physical impression of surprise.
“Well then.” He said again.
Finn sat there in the silence of Tommy’s company. Surprised, and at the same time not, at his reaction.
Tommy got up from his seat and made his was around the desk. Finn stayed where he was. In an act so small, and yet untellingly powerful, tommy placed a hand of finns shoulder, and kept it there.
“How will the others find out?”
They found out at a family meeting a month later, when, a new agenda item was introduced.
For a while after, there was silence.
John, being john, broke it with,
“Falling for a secretary huh?” he chuckled, “that seems more like something i’d do.”
That lightened the tension. Amid the other items on the list, Finn leaned over to Ada, who sat on his right.
“Tell me,” He asked quietly to her, “did you know?”
She breathed a moment, finding the words to use.
“I knew you had more on your mind than we could ever know.”
Finn looked back ahead, letting her words sink into his mind. Her hand rested on his knee with quiet warmth and reassurance.
~~~~
You waited outside the meeting room until the rest of them filed out. Finn was the last, and when he appeared you gave him a quick peck on the lips, and held his hand, walking together out of the building.
My dad has brain cancer and i dont know how to move forward.
Hello, my name is Marie, I am 20, and im currently losing my shit in my bathroom at 11:15 at night because i don't know what to do or where to go or how to process any of this.
My dad was diagnosed with a glioblastoma in october. It was rather sudden - the symptoms arose in days and he went to the hospital after 4 days of vomiting and vertigo. The diagnosis came and he had surgery to remove most-ish of the tumor three weeks later. Its ruined everything.
Hes not the same person. Hes so aggressive and hurtful. He can barely get out of bed most days and walks with a walker now. He struggles sometimes to hold things without his hands shaking and dropping them. He yells, gets frustrated at the strangest things, and thinks everyones out to get him. He used to be so loving. So funny. He was so popular with his workmates before. Now, when they call to ask about him, he yells at his phone to "shut the fuck up" and refuses to answer it. He ignores his dog, who used to be his best friend. He used to love the outdoors, and now he keeps the blinds closed and says he doesnt give a fuck about going outside. He stares at the wall for hours in complete silence. My mom is in pieces. Hes been so cruel to her, torn into her over and over and over until shes been reduced to a sobbing mess. Insults, yelling, spitting everything he says at her. She flushed her wedding rings and drinks heavily, worsening her already bad drinking habits.
Hes been given a year to live. Maybe more, maybe less, but i don't know what to do with this information. I feel like i live with a stranger and so does my mom. He used to be my best friend. Now im just some bitch who "pecks him" to take his medicine. (he perceives every interaction we have with him as us being aggressive and snide, no matter what we say).
How do we do this. Where do i go. We have a treatment team of doctors and he starts chemo in three days. But i feel so lost. It feels like hes already died, hes so different. My heart aches. I cry every single day. Im so tired and so beaten down watching him deteriorate like this. Day after day his attitude gets worse, he refuses to walk more, he takes 6 hours to "feel like" getting out of bed to take a shower. His manners have disappeared. My dad was never any of this. I dont know who this man is. And every day he looks at me like im some....thing. like he doesnt even know me. Like im some distant disliked coworker....even though im his daughter, his "little girl", the one he used to take on "daddy daughter days" when i was little, days where we would go to lunch and watch the birds at the lake and hang out just the two of us. He would sing me irish lullabies when i was very little.
Ive lost him. I dont know what to do. I want so badly to help him, to make his pain go away, to make him happy again. I want him to feel the sun and feel alive and happy. I want him back. I know he'll never come back..but i want to ease his pain and the doctors and even the on site psychologist have explained to us that theres essentially nothing we can do but stay strong and stand by him. To me, that goes without saying, ill never leave his side or give up on him. But right now all i know is that it hurts so much and i dont know where to go or how to heal or even feel anything after this.
I guess what im asking is...has anyone else experienced this? What did you do? How did you cope? What are your tools that help you get by everyday? Ill do anything. Ill take my own arm off to make him happy. To make things right again.
[draft → MEMEFUCKER #1 ] u r small like a pupper. look like floofy pup
Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text.
[sent → MEMEFUCKER #1 ] heyo freddyo please stop giving my sister weird candies pleaseeee i just wanted to sleep but her hair is turning yellow?? we dont fuck w eurocentric beauty ideals
Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.
[sent → MEMEFUCKER #1 ] HAVE YOU SEEN STAR WARS
Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text.
[sent → MEMEFUCKER #1 ] is it the same with you and your other half? when p and i were growing up, we were fuckin inseparable and we still kind of are it’s just,,, it feels like there’s this hole inside me where she used to be,, idk sorry
