#androableism

[thisisparamisia]

I think women who are pedophiles are way more accepted than men who are. Recently a woman made a video on Tiktok talking about her experience as a non offending pedophile, and it's really nice to see that she's actually getting support and people are understanding her, there's still people disgusted ofc but I was very surprised that there were people that listened to her because I'm use to seeing only men come out about their experiences but they get met with so much hate and almost no support, any people that support get met with hate too.

This is androparamisia and toxic femininity.

It's because the demonization of masculinity. People view men as predators, and think that men will rape whatever gender or type of person they are attracted to. So when people hear that a man is attracted to a child, they think that the man is bound to rape said child.

People think women are innately purer and less capable of harm. They think that men have no self control, but women do. So these people often think that women cannot be child predators, and thus a pedophile woman is "not something to be feared."

(And to be clear, pedophiles arent something to be feared regardless of gender. But I'm saying this from the perspective of someone who doesn't care about the difference between a child predator and a pedophile.)

[this-is-varsexism-transphobia]

I saw a post which was literally saying that if someone points out that the phrase "I hate men" is bad, then they're not "as much as a feminist" as they think and they're the problem. [the content of the post:

If you see someone post "I hate [oppressive majority class]" and your first instinct as someone in that oppressive majority class is to get upset and argue that youre one of the good ones or to stop generalizing you're lowkey part of the problem

#if i say “I hate men” and your first instinct is to shout “CAN YOU SAY YOU HATE CIS WHITE NT HET UPPER CLASS MEN INSTEAD” #You aren't as much as a feminist as you think. I am in fact talking about you as well #i need a tag for politics talk. uhhh #to be tagged #there. bam

/the end of the content of the post ]. I would have send a screenshot but I couldn't send it with an image (I was off-anon, and when I was trying to send it, I got an error).

This is anti-masculinity. Men are not inherently an oppressive force. Marginalized men exist.

TGD (trans & gender diverse) men, varsex men, queer men, BIMOC, disabled men, fat men, "too skinny" men, homeless men, and economically vulnerable men all have forms of masculinity that are oppressed and not supported by the patriarchy. Intersectionality is not a woman-only trait (example: black men have an extremely high arrest rate due to people deeming them as the most dangerous race+gender combo.)

I discuss this in more depth on my @this-is-anti-masculinity account often.

[callahan----callahan-again]

not to make a gigantic deal out of this but i desperately need everyone who even got a teensy bit sad at isff/suggestrogen being banned or whatever the fuck to shut the fuck up and start caring even the littlest bit about how that fucking "discourse" also known as absolutely refusing to see anything any trans woman does as wrong in any capacity bubbling over to this point drove @/crippled-peeper to abandon tumblr.

for anyone who doesnt know, peeper (or morg, but i dont know him personally so ill stick with peeper) was running a pretty damn big blog (probably around the same size as suggestrogen, though i never interacted with her before her nuking) before he decided to formally abandon the site after answering some very kind asks from a handful of other accounts two days ago. he is a transgender man who studied neuroscience before his severe spinal disability took him out of college. he has two cats and planted shit all over to make the world a little bit brighter and healthier (including many a sunflower). he posted about his disability, his identity as a trans man, things he planted, visiting his friends and baking them things, his cats, and his stances on many different things both on tumblr and in the outside world. most recently he had been posting about how disgusting isff's post on pedophilia and the responses of many other people on her side about that topic, how genderqueer minors should absolutely never feel obligated to continue talking to a "proud pedophile", how trans women should be held to the same standards as anyone else and its actually extremely transmisogynistic to hold them in EITHER a higher or lower regard, and had been responding to likely just a sample of the ableist, transphobic, transandrophobic, and androableist hate he had been getting for his posting on the former topics. he then made a post about how he was thinking of ditching the site, due to how many of the people around him were defending rape and pedophilia as to "not be transmisogynistic" or whatever the fuck, before making his last few posts.

now i absolutely do not see this as "social murder" or whatever the fuck, because its not. i do not want to call for any harassment of any blogs involved in peeper's departure from the site. i do not want to make him a martyr for the transmasculine cause. i want to bring attention to exactly how the current state of trans tumblr is affecting trans men and transmasculine people. peeper had been on the site for a long time now, and what drove him off of it was people around him, people he knew and trusted, becoming or showing themselves as rape and pedophilia apologists, likely in part due to isff's recent bullshit. in response to an anon asking if he had any other accounts on anything else, peeper said he didnt, and in the tags said that this site and his friend were basically his only connections to the outside world. i dont know if this is true, but for absolutely anyone who thinks peeper being off this site is a neutral or positive thing, i want that sentiment to sink in. rape/pedophilia apologists and extreme trfs drove a trans man off of one of his two connections to the world at large. let that fucking sink in.

i am reiterating: this post is not trying to say peeper is permanently worse off being off this site. this post is not trying to make a martyr out of him in any fashion. this post is not trying to call for harassment of anyone. this post is not trying to be some biography for a man who left the site. the point of this post is to demonstrate in what ways the current state of tumblr, especially trans tumblr, is affecting trans men and transmasculine people through a specific example of a blog i love.

i never had the pleasure of personally interacting with morg. i dont know any more about him than anyone who can scroll through his blog. i just greatly appreciated his presence on this site. he was caring and kind but also really fucking honest and direct. i just want people to recognize how trans men/transmascs are being harmed by the current, greatly transandrophobic state of tumblr.

[this-is-anti-masculinity]

If your concept of feminism isn't open to marginalized mascs sharing their experiences with anti-masculinity and the negative impacts toxic masculinity had on them growing up, then your feminism is outdated and isn't truly focused on gender equality.

BIPOC, disabled, fat, and queer mascs face unique challenges and this shouldn't be a controversial take, nor should it be perceived as a threat against feminism.

[this-is-anti-masculinity]

"Only people perceived as female are scared of walking alone at night."

(PT: "Only people perceived as female are scared of walking alone at night.")

This just tells me that you:

1- Haven't spoken to enough genderqueer & sexqueer men, who are hatecrimed for not conforming to gender & sex "standards." 2- Haven't spoken to enough queer-oriented men (gay, mspec, aspec, etc) who are hatecrimed for not conforming to amato/heteronormativity. 3- Haven't spoken to enough non-fem/non-masc perceived enben and intersex people, who are hatecrimed for not being "fem/masc enough." 4- Haven't spoken to enough BIMOC, who are hatecrimed for their ethnicity (which, in many cases, since masculinity is stereotyped as "dangerous", and their ethnicity is deemed "dangerous", these two intersect and multiply the harassment they receive.) 5- Haven't spoken to enough disabled men, who are hatecrimed for their disability (which, like with BIMOC, disability is often deemed "dangerous", which intersects with the demonization of masculinity.) 6- Haven't spoken to enough homeless or economically vulnerable men (same points as 4 & 5, homelessness/poorness is deemed "dangerous," masculinity is deemed "dangerous", you see the picture.) 7- Haven't spoken to enough fat or "too skinny" men, who are hatecrimed for their body type (often intersecting with how it doesn't fit into "traditional masculinity.") 8- Haven't spoken to enough men who are victims of SA (which happens more often than you think [link], with 1 in every 6 perisex/perisex-perceived cis men being victims.)

"Oh, but its men who are doing these hatecrimes! Even male victims are victims of other men!"

Incorrect. A lot of women will harass the fuck out of marginalized men. If you listened to the experiences of marginalized men, you'd know that. Have ya'll forgotten that the term "Karen" came from the black community [link] describing how white women would weaponize white gender essentialism to harass black people, especially black men, for being "sexual deviants"? And this happens to other marginalized men too.

Additionally, a lot of women's crimes are underreported due to men being told it "isn't possible for them to be assaulted", that they are "weak" if they are assaulted, that they "must have enjoyed it" if they were assaulted, and that women are a "perfect, innocent gender who are always the victims and never the perpetrators." It doesn't help that hotlines and shelters for victims will turn away men who need help, decreasing the likelihood that they will feel safe enough to tell anyone.

[this-is-anti-masculinity]

Radical feminists are bad for many many reasons (transphobia, varsexism, etc), but one thing we have to blame them for is how they brutally bully young boys and men who want to be leftists, because "men are evil and women are perfect", and they view their fake version of feminism to be a "woman's only" club.

And then men who are part of big toxic masculine cult movements - like alpha males and incels - take advantage of this isolation. They tell these young boys and men "we'll accept you. We'll help you find somewhere you belong. Women don't want you, but we can change that/you don't need them."

Because this IS a cult. It really is. It is a cult that targets boys and men. These people are so desperate to be desired and loved and wanted - because they grow up in a society where boys/men are demonized for showing affection, where they are bullied for showing any emotion, where they are told to "man up" - that they listen, they obey, because maybe it will mean they can be desirable. It starts off small, but it gets more and more extreme as it goes, just as all cults do.

It gets to a point where these boys and men spend hours on end on incel forums or alpha male podcasts, often of which will lead them into buying online courses or going to actual camps (yes, that's a real thing, look it up) where they are told to be on a strict diet, don't be fat, workout all day long, never sleep "more than you need to", never eat "more than you need to", etc, etc, etc - basically, telling them to torture themselves.

They promote eating disorders, body dysmorphia, exercise addiction, work addiction, sleeping disorders, and so much more.

More often than not, the boys and men falling into this are fat or disabled, and are made to feel uniquely unlovable by society, hence why they develop such a strong sense of desperation.

And then radical feminists have the audacity to point at these men and say "wow look at them, so evil, so horrible, I can't believe they believe these things" as if they didn't push them away. As if they aren't also a part of a gender-based cult.

While at the same time supporting women who fall into similar beauty standard cults, saying "it's not their fault, of course they torture themselves into being beautiful, it's what the patriarchy does!" - forgiving any toxic femininity that comes from them, while not holding that same grace towards men who struggle with toxic masculinity, who are also being tortured by the patriarchy into specific beauty standards.

And before any of the "piss on the poor" commenters come here - no, I am not excusing toxic masculinity and misogyny. No, I'm not saying men who use these cults to be predators should be let off the hook.

But I think it's important to remember that not everyone who has fallen victim to these movements are unsalvageable. They're just people. Their behaviors are wrong, but they are still capable of change.

Many of these boys and men just need to be given a chance, a better community to belong to. And sometimes that takes a bit of pushing, because they are trapped in a cult, but really, most of them are not lost causes.

Pushing men away from leftism only gives the patriarchy more power, and thus, gives leftists more people to fight against.

[this-is-anti-masculinity]

Introduction

Blogs like this one [link]

Who owns this blog?

[PT: Who owns this blog?]

Hello! I am Kris, the owner of this blog. I am intersex transmasc non-binary and use they/them pronouns. I am part of @dhddmods system, though I tend to function on my own.

I run five other blogs, known as @androqueer-struggles (focused on the struggles and/or oppression of intersex mascs, peritrans mascs, butches, etc), @this-is-varsexism-transphobia (focused on oppression towards genderqueer and sexqueer people), @this-is-amato-heteronormativity (focused on amatonormativity and heteronormativity), @this-is-deformimisia (focused on the oppression of people with physical deformities & disfigurements), and @thisisparamisia (focused on the oppression of people with paraphilias, especially paraphilic disorders.)

What is this blog? What is the tagging system?

[PT: What is this blog? What is the tagging system?]

This blog is centered around anti-masculinity, as well as toxic masculinity (from a "this is how toxic masculinity affects other masc people" perspective.)

Anti-masculinity is the fear-mongering or hatred of masculinity. Some examples of anti-masculinity include the following:

-The demonization of BIPOC masculinity, disabled masculinity, fat masculinity, and queer masculinity. -Treating androgenized characteristics (beards/hairiness, penises, deep voices, etc) as scary, ugly, or undesirable due to being "masculine." -Assuming that masculine individuals are dangerous, predatory, or abusive by default (ie; viewing a father on a playground with their kid as inherently suspicious, viewing a butch lesbian as unsafe to be around women, etc.) -Assuming that because masculinity is so "undesirable" and "scary", masculine people can never be victims of abuse.

Toxic masculinity is the pressure to conform with a specific form of masculinity. Some examples of toxic masculinity include the following:

-Telling mascs that they should be "protectors" and enforcing an idea of physical strength (possibly even violence/aggression) on them, and degrading their masculinity if they don't fit this archetype. -Telling mascs that they should be hypersexual and degrading their masculinity if they don't fit this archetype. -Telling mascs that they should suppress all emotions except for anger. -Telling mascs that they should not seek help for anything and should "tough it out" or "learn how to deal with it", and should be hyper-independent.

The tagging system will go as follows:

-Anti-Masculinity: General anti-masculine sentiments. - Toxic Masculinity: General toxic masculinity. - Homoandrophobia/Gayphobia: Oppression towards achillean mascs. - Andro-Monosexism: Oppression towards m-spec mascs. - Andro-Amatonormativity: Oppression towards a-spec, non-partnering, or non-monogamous mascs. - Transandrophobia: Oppression towards transmascs or people perceived as transmasc. - Androqueerphobia: Oppression towards queer masculinity/masculine-perceived queers; intersex mascs, transmascs, butches, etc. Aka, oppression of genderqueer or sexqueer mascs. - Androracism: Oppression towards BIPOC mascs. Andronoirism is a subset of this directed towards black or brown mascs. - Androableism: Oppression towards disabled mascs. - Androsizeism: Oppression towards mascs of specific body types (typically mascs who are fat, but could apply to skinniness or height.) - Androclassism: Oppression towards mascs who are not economically privileged.

Isn't "misandry" anti-feminist?

[PT: Isn't misandry anti-feminist?]

Yes, misandry is anti-feminist because it is a term that was bastardized by incels and anti-feminists to imply that the patriarchy doesn't exist.

However, anti-masculinity (and toxic masculinity's impact on mascs) does exist. BIPOC mascs, disabled mascs, fat mascs, queer mascs, and economically vulnerable mascs face the most of this.

Some people still use the term "misandry" when describing anti-masculinity, but I personally think this muddies the water of what is and isn't true anti-masculinity.

"Aren't BIPOC mascs just oppressed for their race?" "Aren't disabled mascs just oppressed for their disability?" "Aren't fat mascs just oppressed for their weight?" "Aren't queer mascs just oppressed for their queerness?" "

No. Their oppression directly intersects with the demonization and/or strict ideals of masculinity.

For example, black men are treated as aggressively masculine criminals who cannot be trusted, and will use their masculine aggression to harm white people. BIPOC masculinity is treated very differently (but not any "better") than BIPOC femininity.

Another example would be masculine disabled people who have "scary" disabilities - masculinity causes them to be treated as far more dangerous than their non-masculine counterparts.

And for disabled men with high support needs, they are treated as "failures of men" or told they are "weaponizing their incompetence" or are otherwise misogynistic.

Fat and poor men are also often treated as dangerous, disgusting predators due to their fatness + masculinity or poorness + masculinity.

As for queer masculinity, I am just going to redirect you to this post [link] I made about transmascs.

"But you acknowledged toxic masculinity exists."

Yes, it does, and toxic masculinity harms mascs just as much as it harms non-mascs.

That doesn't mean ALL masculinity is toxic. Not to mention, toxic femininity exists as well - that doesn't mean misogyny isn't real.

"Systemic oppression for masculinity isn't real. Thats basic feminism."

1- Yes, it is true that systemic oppression against femininity is more generalized against all forms of femininity, which isn't the case for masculinity. But systemic oppression does exist for atypical masculinity; just not for generalized masculinity.

2- Basic feminism wasn't written with every marginalized group in mind, and thus, has shortcomings. It's not a bad thing to broaden your definition of feminism. Feminism =/= being feminine-centric; feminism is meant to be gender equality, and that includes equality for oppressed mascs.

Am I safe here?

[PT: Am I safe here?]

This blog is safe for people of any weight or body type, and does not tolerate body shaming.

This blog is safe for people with physical/sensory disabilities and neurodivergence of any kind (including cluster b personality disorders, behavioral disorders, paraphilic disorders, addictive/dependent disorders, etc.)

This blog is safe for non-disordered systems/plurals, non-dissociative systems/plurals, and endogenic systems/plurals.

This blog is safe for alterhumans.

This blog is safe for "contradictory" labels (ie; transfems AFAB, transmascs AMAB, lesboys, turigirls, etc.) Being against these identities is deeply exorsexist, intersexist, and pluralphobic at its core.

[this-is-anti-masculinity]

Toxic masculinity results in men being more willing to do violent acts of suicide and self harm on themselves, due to being told it is manly to suck up their pain.

Toxic masculinity results in men being 4x more likely to commit suicide than women, due to men's mental health being treated like a joke. Men make up 80% of suicide statistics.

Is Lethality Different between Males and Females? Clinical and Gender Differences in Inpatient Suicide Attempters [Link] Differences in Suicide Among Men and Women Suicide Data and Statistics [link] Suicide rates are higher in men than in women [link] Samaritans.org suicide data [link] Suicide Data - National Institution Of Mental Health [link]

Homoandrophobia and andro-monosexism is the fact that 19% of achillean men attempt suicide, compared to 3% of non-achillean men.

Suicide Attempts Among Gay And Bisexual Men [link] Suicide Rate High Among Urban Gay Men [link]

Andro-amatonormativity is the fact that asexual men are at a higher rate of suicide than asexual women (as men are stereotyped to be sexual).

Experiences of minority stress and their impact on suicidality among asexual individuals [link]

Androqueerphobia is the fact that more than 50% of trans men have attempted suicide, and intersex people (including intersex men) are at a higher risk of suicide compared to their perisex (non-intersex) LGBTQ+ peers.

Transgender Adolescent Suicide Behavior [link] Intersex Youth Mental Health Report [link]

But sure. Say that men aren't negatively impacted by the patriarchy, that the patriarchy supports all men.

Lie that men don't have unique struggles with mental health, just as you lie about how men don't know what it's like to experience sexual violence (statistics on that here [link.])