These are mostly notes for myself and (hopefully) of gratitude to some of the people I shared time with. This post is probably mostly indecipherable to anyone else.
As always, thanks to @beguiledcon concom and volunteers and everyone who worked to make con run smoothly! There's so much effort behind the scenes to create such a wonderful space. I appreciate you all.
Thank you to everyone who came to my Hypnoamory class! I think I might retire it now for a bit but- I really appreciated all of the thoughts, questions, and experiences shared. Someone in the Discord gave feedback about the space feeling safe to talk and- nothing could make me prouder or happier. Also thinking on something a participant shared about the nature of the community- how less people are joining in middle age with established monogamous relationships (like me) and more are joining younger with a pre-existing poly bent and lots of models on what different relationships can look like. I hope that equips them better to navigate these choppy emotional waters!
Now to the vague:
-Frontier is the worst airline. Do not fly Frontier.
- Snuggles and sleep- eventually
- Midnight video- was entirely exhausted but was nice to see you and extra nice to be included/thought of
-Robots are easy to store and good at finding creative ways to dispose of crumbs (but may need reminders to also fold the blankets)
-Back and forth story completion
-Delicious pepperoni pizza. Still working on you remembering to open EVERY door. ;)
-Directing your visual focus where you DON'T want it to be never gets old
-You're just too easy, cupcake.
-Doing a striptease by just unlacing my sneakers. You know how much you want it.
-Love manhandling you with cuddles whenever I can :)
- Just breathe. Just be. (So so appreciative to be taken care of in that way- I never feel like I can convey how much)
-Taking the tension off the muscles in my neck
-We didn't get to do a thing but I appreciate you messaging me and trying to make it happen! At a different con where my headspace/energy were better, I definitely would have loved to talk more and maybe even find some play.
-REALLY sorry we didn't get to do a thing and was happy to message a bit about your experiences shortly after con. You're so sweet and fun and I hope it will be epic when it happens.
- Being reassured on a Discord after con that I wasn't being rude to people I like (even though I really felt closed off and like I acted "off" all weekend)
-Didn't know I would get on my knees that fast -guess I was just eager
-Glad you appreciated the dress (and would love some further time for that appreciation in the future). Thank you for the headpets!
-Thank you for checking in on me in general
-Thank you for the headpet chain! (I really like you and talking to you and giving you head pets)
-Appreciate meeting you in person and being a mutual fan. :) Your comment pulled me out of my condrop and some con-related catastrophizing. Genuinely- thank you.
-I never told you this but- your class was great and fun and your rainbow shoes were most excellent
-Hypnoyoga is the secret best class at any con. Felt SO good and necessary
-Pushing someone into a wall has never been so hilariously fun. Thank you for noticing I was down and giving me some lovely arm decoration
-Topping is for Everyone is such a kind class. I appreciate how it gets different as you evolve as a top and in your relationships. Huge source of compersion (if I'm using that right)
-Being hypnotized as a first time subject. You know this but you're, like, really good.
-Also- I love hypnotizing you and just giving you all the affection. Where did time go?
-Horse hypnosis
-Also? Chicken hypnosis
-Massive hugs.
- Always grateful to have started this journey with you.
- @arihi has the coolest friend group. All hits, no misses
-I know being hypnotized sounds uncertain now but- you're genuinely an awesome person and I hope you have great early experiences with someone you can trust.
-Also? Great DJ.
-The white person wedding dance
-Room of queers singing Pink Pony Club
-Thank you for telling me about your sweet bimbo coworker and showing me your forearms. You get more amazing everytime I see you. I wish grad school-you could see you now.
-I don't ever read Read Only Mind, I just read Mcstories
-Bewitched convention
-Hobbyist Convention
-Reviewing some hypnotic patter tricks
-Delicious cookies, cool patches
-Desperate, horny, and desperately horny
-Being seduced right past my limits
-But at the end, I wanted it to just be you
-Scene so nice it went right past dinner
-Being an easy touch
-That means love, y'know? You saw my class
-Taking care of me through my nap/drop. You don't have to take care of me in that way and I'm so appreciative that you did and do
-Seeing so many incredible outfits and especially beautiful dresses. Admiration
-I'm sorry I missed your class but your presence is always so clear to me. Always happy to see you bloom and shine
-I'm glad things are better at work and with crafting +2 dungeon equipment- you seemed so centered and your energy is always my favorite. I already shared your advice about breakfast nuts today. A+++ great person, no notes.
-Dunkin bunnies
-Speaking of cool friend groups (which I did way above), oikos has the best extended polycule. Kind lovely folks I'm always happy to see.
-Your long braided hair is so beautiful and you're just so thoughtful and compassionate with the way you do things. Also- will always make me blush. I hope your ball experience with the puppies was everything you hoped it would be
- Missed you. Hope you could somehow feel us missing you wherever you are. I hope you were able to access the pictures and the music
-Missed you too- but pretty sure I'll see you at Charmed. Hope camp was great and looking forward to hopefully learning y'alls Sunday night card game
At work the day after a late flight home from Beguiled - cursing the fact that I couldn’t take the extra day off to relax and decompress. A full, longer write up will come later, but I just wanted to say that it was an amazing time and I already miss the familiar faces. I literally say this after every con but I’ll try to be more active on social media, particularly Tumblr! I need hypnosis tumblr to make a comeback y’all. Cool and fresh!
At a big event this weekend and my heavens my ego is being fueled by the number of times people have approached me to compliment or even thank me for my online presence.
I knew our words traveled further than we would ever know after the 4 Hour Plurality Panel at Charmed in January, but it is one thing to video in and another to be present at an event where people can corner you and share their perspectives and how things impact them.
Sometimes we all need to be reminded that the likes and reblogs are attached to real humans and that living openly proudly *is* a radical action that inspires and helps other people.
It means a lot that we make a difference by sharing our experience and educating in the capacity we do.
I love this community, I love our people and I love our Tumblr circles.
Endorsement from submitter: "Lots of science, slow-burn m/m"
In 1963, in a Siberian gulag, former nuclear specialist Valery Kolkhanov has mastered what it takes to survive: the right connections to the guards for access to food and cigarettes, the right pair of warm boots to avoid frostbite, and the right attitude toward the small pleasures of life so he won’t go insane. But on one ordinary day, all that changes: Valery’s university mentor steps in and sweeps Valery from the frozen prison camp to a mysterious unnamed town that houses a set of nuclear reactors and is surrounded by a forest so damaged it looks like the trees have rusted from within.
In City 40, Valery is Dr. Kolkhanov once more, and he’s expected to serve out his prison term studying the effect of radiation on local animals. But as Valery begins his work, he is struck by the questions his research raises: why is there so much radiation in this area? What, exactly, is being hidden from the thousands who live in the town? And if he keeps looking for answers, will he live to serve out his sentence?
Based on real events in a surreal Soviet city, and told with bestselling author Natasha Pulley’s inimitable style, The Half Life of Valery K is a sweeping new adventure for readers of Stuart Turton and Sarah Gailey.
Setting: Russia/Soviet Union, 1963
Historical fiction, mystery, romance, 1960s, Cold War, adult
The Enlightenment series (Provoked, Beguiled, Enlightened, Unnatural, Restored, and other stories) by Joanna Chambers
Tormented by his forbidden desires for other men and the painful memories of the childhood friend he once loved, lawyer David Lauriston tries to maintain a celibate existence while he forges his reputation in Edinburgh’s privileged legal world.
But then, into his repressed and orderly life, bursts Lord Murdo Balfour.
Cynical, hedonistic and utterly unapologetic, Murdo could not be less like David. And as appalled as David is by Murdo’s unrepentant self-interest, he cannot resist the man’s sway. Murdo tempts and provokes David in equal measure, forcing him to acknowledge his physical desires.
But Murdo is not the only man distracting David from his work. Euan MacLennan, the brother of a convicted radical David once represented, approaches David to beg him for help. Euan is searching for the government agent who sent his brother to Australia on a convict ship, and other radicals to the gallows. Despite knowing it may damage his career, David cannot turn Euan away.
As their search progresses, it begins to look as though the trail may lead to none other than Lord Murdo Balfour, and David has to wonder whether it’s possible Murdo could be more than he seems. Is he really just a bored aristocrat, amusing himself at David’s expense, or could he be the agent provocateur responsible for the fate of Peter MacLennan and the other radicals?
There wasn’t a bit of innocence or purity in him. He was sinful and cynical. Unapologetic. He cared nothing for the world. He just ate its fruits and roamed its wilds and didn’t need anyone.
