Okay, I know everyone’s made Dick Grayson out to be a fantastic flirt and a playboy etc. But consider.
When attempting to flirt with one Wally West, he’s an absolute mess.
You see, Wally manages to be adorable and hot at the same time, and Dick is simply not equipped to handle that.
So when attempting to flirt, he ends up saying some ridiculous pickup line, making every single one of his siblings question exactly why he's their brother.
Stephanie uses it to tease Dick endlessly because Wally West is the most oblivious creature on the planet and thinks Dick is joking with him. Tim repeats the pickup line in a mocking impression if Dick's voice. Jason ends up on the floor trying to breathe from how hard he's laughing and just Damian.
Damian looks severely unimpressed, but then Tim whispers something in his ear, cackling and suddenly those emerald eyes are gleaming, and everyone but Dick knows that shit is about to go down.
But then Damian just shakes his head, mutters something about 'Grayson being an incompetent fool as usual' and exits the room to literally everyone's disappointment.
The next morning, Wally is invited over for the day. Wally has just arrived and he and Dick are in the kitchen. Every. Single. Sibling. Is spying on them, except for the resident Mess In Motion™, Tim Drake, who is sitting at the counter with his eleventh cup of coffee, and the Puppy Stealer Damian Wayne.
Wally and Dick are just about to head upstairs when Damian walks in with a box and a smirk that promises trouble.
Damian is Wally's Absolute Favourite Person in the Entire World. So naturally, he pulls a Dick Grayson™, and zooms over to his favourite child like a man on the mission, swooping in for a hug and chattering about ninety miles an hour about what little souvenir he brought back from Copahogen for Damian.
Damian holds up the box. Wally stops talking immediately, all his focus on Damian, the child of his heart. And the child of his heart Damian is, because the kid opens the box and pulls out a pair of running shoes and goggles that look like they've been a work in progress for two decades with how refined they are.
"I hope you shall find these adequate, West. I built them myself and had Drake wire them for you, and the shoes I had custom designed from Star Labs." Wally looks like he's on the verge of tears.
Then Damian pulls out a card from the bottom of the box and deals the killing blow.
"I also took it upon myself to give you a stable nutrition source in case you should find yourself in a... delicate situation. It gives you special access to heavily discounted food from every fast food place in Gotham, Central, Keystone, Coast, Star City, and North America." Wally loses it, weeping and pulling the kid to his chest and then lifting him into the air like he's found God trapped in a human form.
"The love of my life, I shall hold in my heart a special place for you forever!" He literally sobs, shaking Damian a little before crushing him into a hug yet again.
Tim will deny filming the entire thing. He definitely did not zoom in on Dick's face as Wally thanked Damian with salty tears running down his face. Then Wally kissed Damian's forehead and instead of stabbing Wally as expected, hugged Wally back.
Tim will deny whispering,
"Damn Dick, kid's got way more game than you," when Dick whips his head towards Tim, hearing the comment, and starts flat out wailing about betrayal.
This, of course, sparks the beginning of a war that will shake the Wayne Manor, with every single sibling stealing Wally's attention from Dick whenever they're having a moment, or even just hanging out.
Dick can't even get mad at Cass when she interrupts them playing video games to give Wally a huge bowl of ice cream covered in sprinkles and marshmallows, Wally's favorite, earning her a tearful hug, even if she winks at him as she leaves the room. Everything must be blamed on Tim, after all.
Even when they leave the manor and end up at the fucking park for God's sake, Jason shows up and asks Wally to work a case with him, which ends with Wally falling into Jason's arms bridal style. Wally leans up and whispers jokingly in Jason's ear,
"What would Roy think about this Jaybird?" Jason just grins conspiratorially at him which causes the redhead to grin back up at him.
In front of the Batcomputer, Dick fumes. He refuses to talk to Jason for a week.
Even Alfred gets in on it, replying,
"Absolutely, sir. Anything for the young bachelor finally giving out his affection," Or something of the like whenever Dick asks the old butler something.
Dick has just said, 'Fuck it', and leaned in to kiss Wally when fucking Bruce Wayne walks in and asks Wally a groundbreaking question.
"You come here enough and my children have developed a bit of an... unhealthy obsession for you," He starts, stealing Wally's attention, "So I'd like to give you a key to the manor."
While Wally stares in awe at the gold key that now rests in a shaking palm, Bruce winks at Dick who's staring open-mouthed at the obviously timed interruption.
Dick doesn't work up the nerve to try to kiss Wally again that day. He also pretends not to see the knowing smiles and winks Bruce sends his way for nearly six days.
But one day, it just stops. There are no interruptions when Dick puts an arm around Wally's middle and Wally leans into him. There is no sudden, loud entrance of a sibling when Dick leans in slowly, smiling with lidded eyes. There aren't any doors banging open loudly when Dick closes the gap and presses his lips against Wally’s gently, the speedster kissing back readily.
Literally a day later Damian walks in on Dick smiling goofily into space at the counter and snorts.
"I suppose I must congratulate you on getting a boyfriend, Grayson. Treat him right, or my blade will be the last thing you see."
Dick just nods distractedly, mind full of ginger hair, shining eyes and a face painted with constellations.
(Wally must admit, he always got flustered over those ridiculous pickup lines)
