#carbaddict

[urbandesiqueen]

Yum yum yum! #mickeydonut #wintersnacks #carbaddict #sweettooth @mcdonalds (at McDonald's) https://www.instagram.com/p/B6odmGqjIng/?igshid=1ne2b3mpnn1hc

[soulfoodwithjess]

Pleasant for a moment; soon after irritated bowels, bloating, and an extra 3 lbs.

[soulfoodwithjess]

Fake Smiles & Afternoon Tea.

Honesty hour? Things have been whack. This past Saturday (2 days ago) was my first planned cheat day between August 24 and December 31. I actually jumped out of ketosis, and off the wagon all together for that matter, 10 days prior to that.

I couldn't handle the never ending period; I admit that. I want to have a baby so badly that I convinced myself I would "carb-up" again but try to stay under 70 to 100.

To say that I lied to myself would be an understatement. I tried for about an hour. I have had non-stop cocacola and bread and chocolate. I miss not being bloated. I miss the confidence I was feeling. I miss mental clarity and better focus.

On Friday Sept 13 I fell off the last 2 steps at work while retrieving some paperwork and have been weird ever since. It hurt so badly and in the following moments I began to be very faint- right to the point of passing out but thankfully I hung on. I almost puked and sat shaking for about 10 minutes. I blacked out during the fall and have no idea if I hit my head or not but since then I have been extremely dizzy. Looking up, bending over, or just turning to my side in bed has resulted in the most intense vertigo. It feels as though the earth is shaking and rolling and I am going to fall over.

The question I'm wrestling with: is this the result of a head injury I may have sustained? Is it a side effect of the ankle sprain? Or am I experiencing symptoms of type 2 diabetes?

I have always feared I have diabetes but have been unwilling to see a doctor because I do not want my fears confirmed. Now my fear is that I was correct, but through keto was on my way to being rid of the disease before I gave into my sadness and wrecked the progress. What if I was getting better, but before that I was constantly experiencing inflammation of the gut and joints, a fog settling in my mind, and perpetual headaches, and didn't notice? What I believed to be normal life could have been warning signs. This has happened to me before with the whole lactose intolerance thing. Until I eliminated the dairy I had no idea that gas 24 hours a day was not normal. Nor was diarrhea 2 or 3 times per day, stomach aches, and always being bloated.

Even typing this is difficult because I think I know that this is what is happening but I do not want to face it. I do not want to deprive myself of carbs that make me momentarily happy.

I had lost 19lbs. I want to cry thinking about what I could be at now. I look at this photo and see the puffiness back in my face and recognize that fake "I know I'm going to hate this photo" smile.

Baby or no baby, I have to accept that this is addiction and I have relapsed.

Back on the road to recovery.

[thereal-festpak-blog]

#tacotuesday from @thecarbcollection at @borrachavegas ”Carbs are the food of the gods!” #carbaddict #carbsarelife #carbs . . #musicfestival, #edm, #festivaloutfit, #coachella, #edmgirls, #summer, #festival, #coachellastyle, #bonnaroo, #aclfest, #fireflymusicfestival, #electricforest, #lollapalooza, #edmlifestyle, #festivallife, #plur, #plurvibes, #plurlife, #dj, #art, #burningman, #travel, #housemusic, #edc (at Borracha Mexican Cantina) https://www.instagram.com/p/BwUMZqmguwK/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=fmuhhwhg5253

[runloveyogaforever]

My keto everything bagels are ready! . . . #lowcarb #glutenfree #bagels #carbaddict #keto https://www.instagram.com/p/BqQrtA1D_My/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=bar81ci1obpn

[manaclark]

Dear #bread i love you. #carbaddict #breadwitch (at San Terenzo, Liguria, Italy)

[lunacyfringes]

Supper 😍😍😍 #carbaddict #spicy #happybellyhappylife

[thepoochgranny]

DIET, low carb … sad part is once you say low carb … most people panic … and won’t do it …. They think oh your so strong I could never do low carb. But, yes, they can but this is how much power the food company has over everyone … people talk about herion epidemic … etc. It’s the food epidemic that’s killing people … Look at the sugar and chemicals that are in all those process foods that keep you addictive and craving … that will eventually kill you, cause cancer, diabetes you name it ….. the food industry is so powerful they have complete control over people’s minds. Look at some of the most dangerous drugs that are out there with fine print “this may kill you”… and no one cares .. pays Pharma … pays for physician vacations houses cars ….and adds to population control …. the list goes on to many powerful people becoming rich off your sickness … that all stem from what your eating and putting into your body …..and the gov .. is fine with it all because there in big pharma pockets … it’s just so bad … We are so brain washed and “addicted” that even though we want to feel better and have seen others’ own results we just aren’t strong enough to fight the addiction and the chemical …. and brainwashing …. truly just scares me to death now ……what my eyes can truly see 😭…but my mind is like controlled by addiction. Those they say its easy??!! Addiction comes in all forms and affects every “body” & “mind” differently! 😞 The struggle IS REAL!!!