The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
What more can I say? Ink and words have been spilled over this movie, and it won like every Oscar in utter recognition. A singularly-beautiful work of art, an encapsulation of what the books mean even if they're not what the books are. I doubt I could put in a review that hasn't already been said, ten times better, in many fewer words. I love these movies and I can't get enough of them, and I'd recommend them (even the extended editions, though I know that's a hard ask!) to anyone wanting to understand movies. So what follows is just what I noticed this time around, with my notes flowing roughly chronologically with the movie. Sometimes it's literally just quotes and my reaction.
The opening with Sméagol and Déagol raised some interesting points. I hadn't considered that the majority of Gollumn's voice (that being a kind of frog-like sound at the back of the throat) Sméagol already had, and it just got rougher with the ring. It does sound a little discordant with his appearance, but you quickly forget that with both the dated bluescreen CGI on Déagol, and also the intense murder that follows. In particular, I noticed this time around that the music seems to have a heartbeat in the background, and the longer Sméagol strangles his cousin, the slower it gets. A brilliant touch by Howard Shore.
I was in awe of Christopher Lee acting for Saruman's downfall. He's a masterful actor playing a masterful strategist, and the powerful voice only adds to it. Especially when Bernard Hill as Théoden's speech about peace, gibbets and crows causes him to lose his cool. I'm so saddened I didn't get to see more of these two opposite one another; they have such a presence it's hard to think about anything else in that scene.
"Night changes many thoughts." ~Aragorn, reminding me that my depression and anxiety get worse when I stay up late.
I liked Minas Tirith and the grandeur of the city, but when Gandalf started talking to Pippin after meeting with Denethor, I was reminded of Tolkien being a staunch royalist. Especially in his talk of noble lords and "lesser men", while it can be read as a takedown of power-hungry opportunists, I can't help but see a not-so-nice idea about commoners and royals at work there. Bayaz, from The First Law, feels like the culmination of the descendants of that idea, and that's an uncomfortable and unfortunate connection to make.
There's something about the beacon-lighting at Amon Dîn that gets to me. I think it's mostly the scale, and the recognition that, before the internet was invented, we were inventing other ways to reach out.
I don't like the way these movies treat armor. It's not as egregious in the first two movies (or at least I didn't notice it) but more often than not men in full plate are cut down by swords and blades, the very things they were meant to protect against. The soldiers of Gondor wear concealing plate but get stabbed constantly. The scenes are cool, but in the back of my head I'm aware the whole time the orcs should've had hammers or something heavy. If they were meant to be stronger than humans it wasn't really shown.
Some private Wilhelm is in two armies in these movies. Poor family can't catch a break!
Speaking of things at the back of my head: Denethor and Faramir. I know how different they are from the books (Faramir, a noble man who resisted the ring; Denethor, a noble temp at the highest office, driven to despair by the use of his Palantír) versus the conflict that was added in the movies (Faramir, the Luigi of his family; Denethor, a bitter old man with clear favoritism). It feels like a crime that they were treated so badly by the movies and shifted so far, but the resulting family drama made it compelling to watch these characters play out. I'm reminded of the way James Gunn adapts comic books: he takes what he wants, alters what he wishes and leaves out what doesn't work, sometimes to the result that the characters on-screen are nothing like their paneled counterparts. It comes with quite a gain, but the loss is also stark.
I wasn't sure if I was going to like the breakup between Frodo and Sam. Most of the work has been done to show Sam growing short and bitter with Gollum, and Frodo falling under the sway of the ring altering the way he thinks; it's especially noteworthy that Gollum uses Frodo's love of the ring to manipulate him, making Sam seem like a threat and a thief. It makes the moment Frodo sends Sam away seem unbelievable and inevitable. I don't think they should've shown Sam descending the stair, though; that's just a bit too on-the-nose for foreshadowing. I am also not sure how they'd fix it to work: it may just be the hurdle I have to vault to accept everything else.
The tomato scene is quite disgusting to watch. I was invested in the Denethor family drama, but then he took a bite and I was disgusted. And then Pippin started singing and I was hollowed; it's such a hard scene to watch, and it's so difficult to watch him playing golf eating food messily whilst people are dying on his watch.
The conversation Éomer has with Éowyn here is interesting. It's forceful, harsh, maybe a little cruel, but ultimately you can understand it comes from a place of love when Éomer is distraught and worried when Éowyn later falls into a coma. His emotion is clearly understandable on his face, and while he was wrong about his sister (obliquely, technically they were talking about Merry and making it pointedly not about Éowyn) you can see why he wanted to make sure she lived. It also ties into the themes, which I'll discuss in a half-second.
I like the way the mountain path to the Paths of the Dead is built up. There's a zoom where Aragorn is staring into the cavern where you can juuuust make out the King of the Dead, but he's gone in the next shot. The entire buildup hereafter (the re-forging of Andúril, the friendship of the hunting trio, and the skulls within) leading to the King of the Dead is wonderful and spooky.
But more than that, the scene with the Rohirrim watching Aragorn go made me realize the themes of this movie that I had never seen before: hope and faith. Characters are constantly put in terrible and bleak situations and challenged not to lose faith. Many break or falter under these conditions - Denethor notably - and it's not the challenge at the end of the tunnel that's the problem, it's the dark, dark path you have to walk to get there. The speeches are as much for morale as for history to remember the speechmakers, and I'm convinced the leaders who made them knew this. And it's ultimately the people who held tight to hope (even in dire circumstances!) who made it through. Théoden might be the only exception, as he seemed like he really didn't have any recourse, but he does give up the ghost by the end, and willingly lets himself pass on. This is not to degrade him (he's one of my new favorites of the re-watch) but just to draw the analysis a little tighter.
I was also pleasantly delighted by the bond between Éowyn and Merry. It's a lot warmer than I thought it would be, a lot of mutual understanding (she being cast out because she's a woman, he because he's a Hobbit) that causes the two of them to become a formidable duo.
Gimli in the Paths of the Dead grates on me. There's a little too much comedy to him, what with the hands reaching out and the skulls. Everything else is firing on all cylinders, and he's just distracting. But the point where the Dead Men appear behind their king is awesome, and Gimli redeems himself by calling them cowards. There are way too many skulls, though, that's just too many skulls.
God I love siege equipment. Catapults, of course, but mostly trebuchets. The siege of Minas Tirith and the ride of the Rohirrim is just a sheer masterclass in cinematic battles, from the moment heads are launched to the arrival of the Dead Men. Gandalf is very cool, but there's also my favorite character, GROND! GROND! GROND!
The Corsairs and the Easterlings are the things about this movie that I think have aged the worst, or at least second to the CGI. We don't see too many cultures in the movies (there's the Shire and Hobbits, Gondor, Rohan, Bree, Rivendell, Lothlórien, Morder, the Corsairs and the Easterlings) and most of them are amalgamations or decomposites of other cultures (Rohan a lot of Saxons and Nords, Gondor a lot of Rome and Byzantium). The Corsairs seemed to be based on Vikings and the Barbary corsairs, though with some unusual tattoo stylings and ships that seemed to be based on Chinese designs. There's some wiggle room with the Corsairs, as they're specifically pirates and not representative of Umbar as a whole (though the fact it's ruled by Black Númenóreans in the canon doesn't speak highly of them). The same can't be said of the Easterlings/Hróatani/Rhúnedain, who are armies from the East and pretty clearly based on the peoples of the Middle East, probably most specifically the Ottoman Empire. There's very little sympathetic focus on them (mostly from Faramir, given to a corpse) and it feels a little off to have a race of people aligned with Sauron. I don't mind evil people, but an entirely evil people is just plain wrong. (For those of you about to type out the entire history of the Easterlings and why they are the way they are: please research what "Doyalist" and "Watsonian" means and then get back to me).
Shelob is a strong presence in the movie. With the earlier foreshadowing a whole movie ago, plus the buildup with her webs and Gollumn's two-part monologues, when she finally appears she's a goddamned menace. Frodo manages pretty well for awhile, but eventually falls; it's only thanks to the ever-heroic, ever-loyal, kinda stupid and kinda angry Sam that he evens survives, and even then it's a lucky fluke on Sam's part. And even then, Shelob isn't confirmed dead! I'm not going up that stairway anytime soon!
At this point, I was in the middle of the invasion of Minas Tirith, and one thing I noticed was the continuity created by music. The movies have a lot of rapid shots, cutting quickly from moment to moment, and it doesn't feel distracting. The thing that makes the scenes easier to follow is the music: it's a steady, emotional thing that drives us onwards. We're not supposed to see any given moment, but feel them driving at us at once. It helps that there are other scenes where the focus is strictly on the characters and we can follow the action, so these rapid cuts aren't as big a distraction as they could have been.
And now follows a "God this is so cool" timeline during the siege of Minas Tirith:
The Witch-King shows up. His entire design radiates pure aura, and his voice being a loud whisper that carries is an intriguing choice.
Théoden and company! Ride now! Ride to ruin! Ride to the world's ending! A sword day! A red day! Ere the sun rises!!! I would follow that man into HELL and consider it a privilege! Everything Théoden does in these movies pumps my blood and makes me feel alive. We almost feel like we have a chance, at least until...
...the Oliphaunts arrive. We get one heroic charge before the music cuts out and we're left with a literal stomp. These things are terrifying, and the one appearance we saw of them from the previous movie really makes us aware of how fucked our heroes are.
The siblings Éomer and Éowyn both get a cool moment to take down an Oliphaunt. Éomer is more straightforward about it, "merely" chucking a spear at the controller, but Éowyn gets to be clever about it, having Merry take the reigns so she can hamstring the beast and cause it to fall. Alike, and yet distinct, they are.
Everyone gets at least one moment to be a cool badass during this battle, but I want to draw special highlight to Merry, who tackles men bigger than him and brings them down with a short sword. A true soldier of Rohan.
Théoden almost recognizing Éowyn is a heart-stopping moment; you want him to be impressed, not angry, and you want him to live, not be distracted.
For as much as the Oliphaunts are a game-changer for Sauron's side, the heroes manage to hold their own pretty well... until the Witch-King arrives. He's so fucking scary; watching him stand up and ignore his dying Black Wing to toy with his prey was just... so nerve-wracking.
ARAGORN, LEGOLAS AND GIMLI WITH THE ARMY OF THE DEAD LET'S FUCKING GOOOO!!!
The battle with the Witch-King is just one character moment after another for Éowyn, who, like the themes suggest, tightens her shield down and marches into the jaws of death. I think she matches Sam Gamgee for sheer bravery (though not in scale; Shelob is a lot scarier than the Witch-King, but all Sam saw was a big spider, and those aren't uncommon in Middle-Earth).
"You fool. No man can kill me." "I am no man." Glorious. Also good on Merry for being a good ally.
"I go to my fathers... in whose mighty company... I shall not now feel ashamed." 😭 My king!
Éomer crying out in distress when he thought he lost all his family in the world? It's the moment that made me revisit him being a jerk to Éowyn, and add another layer to it.
It's a brief scene, but the fight amongst the orcs at Cirith Ungol reminds me why I love them. They're such bastards, always down for a fight, even if that's with each other. Especially the orc that uses a dropkick and shoves one of his compatriots out the window. It reminds me of Adar from Rings of Power; somehow, on a show that has no good characters, the writers managed to make a compelling addition to the lore of orcs, and it's such a shame it was used for that show.
There's two excellent bits of cinema in the tower of Cirith Ungol when Sam saves Frodo. First is that Sam is fully crying by the time he reaches his liege; he's deeply invested in saving him, and is fully willing to show it. The second is the scarring makeup on Frodo, being the old scar from the Morgul-knife, the new stinger scar from Shelob, and the line of the chain about his neck showing how desperate their journey really is.
I wasn't sure on this watch about the romance between Éowyn and Faramir. There's not really a lot to it, just three scenes and only one with dialogue, but it's sweet, if a little sappy.
And then the final battle, and only a few moments to mention:
"Never thought I'd die side by side with an elf." "What about side by side with a friend?" "Aye. I could do that." 😭 I love those gay homies. I hope they live happily ever after in the Undying Lands.
"I can't carry it for you, but I can carry you!" That's why Sam Gamgee, for all his flaws, is what I aim for. Frodo got most of the way there, but Sam made sure he made it all the way. I bet he could lift Mjolnir.
The moment where Aragorn, believing there's nothing left, says "For Frodo" and charges down the enemy lines. It's a small, quiet moment, but the roar that follows as the Hobbits charge after him and the wizard leads the rest remind me of what epic fantasy can be.
I think we lost something when Sauron doesn't have a physical body. Aragorn fighting the troll is cool and all, but it would've been neat to see the Dark Lord explode at the end. I do know in the books Sauron has a physical form (missing a finger... hee hee hee) and might have left Barad-dûr had he so chosen, but wouldn't have done so unless he was assured of victory. It's not quite in character for him to risk it all. And yet... making him the Great Eye does add to his menace and force, but renders him unable to be defeated in-person on-screen. The eye exploding is cool and all, but we might have had a Thanos being dusted moment. I won't say they made the wrong choice; Tolkien can be frustratingly-vague with his descriptions (try asking a Tolkien subredddit "Do Balrogs have wings?" and watch the flame war that erupts (they do not)) so I don't blame the movie team for the choices they did make. It's just a loss, is all.
The moment the ring is destroyed and the Hobbits are outside on the rocks and Frodo says "It's done" there's 45 minutes left in the movie. Granted, 15 is just credits, but that's still 30 minutes of endings. Potentially, I think the movie could have ended with the fade to black on the rocks; it would wreck book fans, but I think it would still be in line with the hope and faith themes of the movie. Nevertheless, we got all those endings and I'm glad we did; Sam really needed to get some.
If I may stop gushing for a moment, and lay down a final thought before I end this almost-entirely-positive review: The Fellowship of the Ring was the creative team getting their shit together, getting the ball rolling, and as such it had a lot of potential and a lot of growing pains to get to work. The Two Towers was the team getting their shit entirely together to make, I believe, the most cohesive of the three movies. And The Return of the King is that team lasting just long enough to pump out another masterpiece before the cracks got too great, and when the Hobbit trilogy came out those cracks had become chasms. There's moments in this movie where I can see the errors forming down the line, like I'm at the site of a stream that becomes a waterfall. I think these movies could've only been made one time, like a great working from an elf who was a master of their craft. There's never truly been anything like these movies before and after, but I think it's the kind of thing that happens on a much larger timescale than that. It's "merely" been 20 years; I think we'll need to wait much longer to see another great feat like this one.
And yeah, I cried when Frodo got on the boat. I was shedding full tears. I had to stop for a bit because my roommates wanted me to kill a spider, but I finished the movie 45 seconds later and felt that emotion again. I don't think I could ever truly dislike these movies. I will revisit them time and again, and I hope I will continue to grow and continue to think about and revise what these movies mean to me.