#hogwarts situations

[ravenclawtraash]

Gryffindor: My head hurts.

Ravenclaw: That’s your brain trying to comprehend its own stupidity.

[ravenclawtraash]

Slytherin: Can I shoot her?

Ravenclaw: Not in public.

[ravenclawtraash]

[results for finals]

Ravenclaw: Look! I got a 98%! I knew I could do it.

Slytherin: I got a 99%! Thanks for helping me study, by the way. It helped me a lot. We were close, but I’ve still got you beat!

Ravenclaw:

[ravenclawtraash]

Ravenclaw: [studying]

Anyone: [breathes]

Ravenclaw: shUT UP!!!

[ravenclawtraash]

Hufflepuff: Hey Ravenclaw, how do you think you did on your charms exam? I had some issues with the confundus charm.

Ravenclaw: Haha, very funny. The exam isn’t until tomorrow at 3.

Hufflepuff: O-Kay. What day do you think it is?

Ravenclaw: It’s Thursday.

Hufflepuff: Today is Friday. The exam was today.

Ravenclaw:

[ravenclawtraash]

Every Hogwarts Professor: You need a full 8 hours of sleep!

Every Hogwarts House:

[ravenclawtraash]

[Ravenclaw bursts into room]

Ravenclaw: Picture this: 1930s America: The Great Depression. A small girl whose parents have lost their jobs goes on a quest to save her parents and earn money. She sneaks out one night on a train. It’s there she meets Johnnie. He’s a 67 year old hobo who lives off of canned beans. They travel together for 10 miles before the small girl, still nameless, eats a can of his beans. They’re magic beans. It turns out Johnnie is the descendant of Jack from the story of Jack and bean stalk. This small girl begins to grow and grow and grow until she reaches the sky. She grows taller than the atmosphere. There is no oxygen up there. She dies of asfixiation. Her giantess body falls. How many people died from this tragedy? How did the American government cover it up? Why didn’t Johnnie grow? WHERE ARE THE BEANS TODAY???

[ravenclawtraash]

Ravenclaw: Look, I made a spoon hat!

Slytherin: That explains why I’m eating soup with a fork.