#incorrect shadowhunter

[incorrect-shadowhunter]

Dru texts Kit / alt. version

since cassie’s format gave me a bit of anxiety, i decided to make this one… out of the blue 🧐.

anyways, the entire idea belongs to @cassandraclare ! go check all the mysteries unfolding at @secretsofblackthornhall

[incorrectthelasthours]

Cordelia: What’s the first thing you notice when a man approaches you?

Anna: The audacity.

[chainofangels]

Mathew :Beauty is in the eye of whoever is looking at me.

[high-warlock-of-procrastination]

Raphael : Shithead! It's motherfucker.

Simon : How do I tell them apart if you keep calling all my friends "motherfucker"? *sees Jace* Oh, it's this motherfucker.

[incorrectthelasthours]

Alastair, to the Merry Thieves: Well, like we agreed, it is officially after midnight, so I can now say whatever I want.

[they all groan, awaiting Alastair’s cutting insults]

Alastair: Today was actually pretty interesting, and I didn’t mind working with you dorks.

Christopher: You know, the word "dork" is actually a Celtic word meaning "lungfish".

Alastair: Lightwood, I am trying so hard.

[incorrectthelasthours]

Thomas, about Alastair: I think he has a good heart.

Anna: A good heart? I've noticed you staring at his “good heart.”

[incorrectthelasthours]

Tessa, trying to work the oven: Wh-Why hasn’t it heated up? I-Is it broken? Did we pay the gas bill?

Will: Yes, we paid the gas bill. I remember ‘cause the check number ended in 69 and we high-fived.

Lucie: Why?

Tessa: Never mind.

[incorrectthelasthours]

Cordelia: Well, Alastair and I never actually fought when we were younger.

Alastair: Except sometimes you would get angry when I would throw a baseball bat at you.

Cordelia: You did throw a baseball bat at me but that was pure accident, right?

Alastair: No, that was a game we were playing.

Cordelia: It was Taste My Steel but I feel like it was pure accident.

James: What’s Taste My Steel?

Alastair: It was a game we invented.

Cordelia: Yeah, it was a real collaborative effort. Basically, Alastair had an aluminium baseball bat and he would throw it at me, but I would know it was coming.

Alastair: How would you know?

Cordelia: Because you would shout: "taste my steel!" And throw the bat at me.

Alastair: You dodged it every time, though.

Cordelia: Except the last time that we played it. You hit me right in the eyeball and I got the biggest, nastiest shiner anyone's ever gotten and then mum was like: "hey, don't play Taste My Steel anymore."