YOU'RE THE BRIGHTEST 𝒮𝒯☆ℛ I SEE
sweet boy ── ˙♡₊˚ 💐 ̟ !!
── MY SIRIUS. its your first year of university and you meet a strange boy obsessed with astrophysics—your worst subject. you two form a transactional relationship, agreeing to teach each other your respective skills. yet as this relationship builds, you find yourselves wanting to become a lot more than just study buddies.
𝜗ৎ nerdjo x fem!reader
𝜗ৎ content; slow burn, mutual yearning, mentions of anxiety, cursing, FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF, comfort, satoru is very easily flustered, satoru is an astrophysics major, reader is into literature, implied fem reader, kissing, little ooc satoru, making out, sfw (no explicit smut) ㅤᵕ̈
𝜗ৎ word count; 5.6k
your first day of university was shit, to put it bluntly. too many people, too few friends, professors that you can already tell would be the bane of your existence for the semester, and to top it all of you received homework. on the first day. dozens of textbook questions awaited you, from all sorts of random ass classes. (seriously, how the hell did they manage to assign 20 textbook questions from an underwater basket weaving course? you’d only taken it because it sounded so ridiculous you thought you could just treat it as a spare period!)
safe to say, this semester was going to be hell. you’d resigned yourself to the library for the entire afternoon, going over every topic from microbiology to leo tolstoy to the most malleable waterproof fiber. but what really had you stuck in the library for so long was astrophysics. it was the most confusing shit you’ve ever seen, you think you’ve fallen asleep at least four times while trying to read the first page of primordial black holes—a concept.
just as you were about to call it a night and accept your fate of failing physics, you spot a boy in the corner of the library. and he was reading one of your favourite books of all time. and by the looks of it, he didnt seem to be enjoying it very much.
with too much caffeine in your system and too little shits to give you approach him.
“hey! is someone sitting here?” you ask as politely as possible.
. . .
he doesn't even bother to glance at you as waves his hand a bit. you narrowed your eyes in annoyance. was that an invitation to sit down or a silent way of saying fuck off? either way you simply sat. by his reaction you could tell his intention was the latter.
okay, rude much? is this guy an asshole or does he just have 0 social skills?
“um. can i help yo-” he starts, his gaze sweeps over you and and his eyes widen, his mouth shuts closed when he sees the textbook you’re carrying, his expression suddenly brightening.
“primordial black holes?! no way! someone else is interested in them! they’re so cool, the way their density fluctuates but the fact they could be completely hypothetical-”
you snort, slightly guilty to confess, “yeah, um, i don't mean to disappoint, but i don't really understand shit about them. it’s for a class.” and you feel a little pang in your heart when you see his expression sink,
“what about that book though!” you quickly recover “its short but its such an amazing classic. had me sobbing for a good hour-” but now its his turn to cut you off
“i, um, don't really understand anything about it either." he quips back, still deflated from the knowledge that they started teaching one of his passion subjects just as homework, “it feels more like riddles than dialogue. im also just reading it for a class”
okay, touché. mr. asshole.
“well it gets better as you go along, i promise” you try to explain, you’ve seen too many people drop this literary masterpiece because the beginning was too ‘challenging to understand’ seriously, has the quality of literature really gone so down these days that people can't even recognize a few metaphors?
satoru doubted that it would, but he just started the semester, and he had zero friends. so he decided to at least try and make you hate him a little less, since he’s aware he came off as a total douche
“what if i explain primordial black holes to you, and in return you translate the dreamer’s backstory into normal english” he thought it was a pretty good plan, more of a gamble than an actual transaction, but he wasn’t picky.
to be honest, he just really wanted to nerd out about his passion. knowing that you were on the cusp of one of the most exciting concepts of mankind but not pulling through with it was something he had to make sure didn't happen. nobody would ever listen to him for more than 5 minutes at a time when he started talking physics, but you didn't really have a choice, did you?
“y’know what? fine. ill make you realize how much of a masterpiece this book is.”
“and ill make you realize how cool black holes are.”
“fine then.” “fine.”
and from there, your purely academic transactional friendship blossomed. he explained physics in such a way that it felt more like a story or a beautiful novel rather than real concepts, and you explained heavy literature in a way that totally engaged him. he even bought a collector’s copy of white nights to frame on his dorm shelf.
as the weeks progressed, you two grew into even closer friends, you both had underwater basket weaving together (finally that class is good for something) and you had the same spare period. you two would usually spend afternoons together teaching each other english or physics respectively, or mutually struggle with how to create the perfect plait, twine, and coil for good quality baskets, which was strangely a lot harder than it sounded, you were learning to respect underwater basket weavers more and more by the day. the fact that they could go through this hell and still manage to find their passion in it was astounding to you.
when you came back to him one day with an A on your physics assignment, he was so overjoyed that—ignoring the fact he was in a cramped library—he picked you up and spun you around, getting you guys kicked out for accidentally knocking down a shelf of books (it’s not like anybody read those ones anyway! who even reads narcissistic autobiographies dressed as ‘self-help’ books? yet the librarian wasn't buying into your defense, and threatened to blacklist you guys from the library if you didn’t leave)
satoru was laughing all the way back to the dorm rooms that day, you couldn't tell if he was so giddy about you acing a physics assignment because of him or because you and the librarian were going back and forth for a solid ten minutes. either way, it was worth it, you loved seeing him so carefree like this. he used to be so stuck-up and stoic, but seeing him come out of his shell over time and feel comfortable enough to laugh with you made your chest feel warm.
over time, you could easily establish that satoru’s love language was gift-giving. he would always buy you coffee before your library study times. it was ridiculous, really. the coffee was insanely expensive and he would go out of his way to add toppings as well.
he started out the whole tradition with vowing to get you every drink on the menu until he found your favourite. you’d insisted that he didnt have to get you anything from that overpriced coffee shop and you were more than satisfied with your homemade coffee, but he wouldn't have any of it. after two weeks of trial, he’d finally established that french vanilla lattes with extra sugar were your favourite (to his delight, as he loved sweets, and would always steal sips from your drinks) and would bring it to you every day on your spare period, despite the fact that it cost a solid $8.
he would often get you little trinkets or souvenirs every now and then. he missed a day of studying together? he’d come back the next with a handwritten apology note and a little jellycat keychain, the one that you’ve kept dangling on your backpack because you really loved it. and how a gentle smile would grace his face every time he saw it on your backpack.
he bought you a little spaceship pencil and matching eraser from when he went to the NASA space center for a course trip, and you’ve been using them ever since.
but what really touched your heart was when he went on a trip to europe, as he got you beautiful special edition copies of a few of your favourite books from the livraria lello, you were so happy that you burst out crying—much to his panic.
he thinks that the day he realized he really fell for you was when he took you out to a concert of your favourite artist. when he told you he bought the tickets, you screamed so hard he didn't think his ear drums would ever recover. and he wouldn't have it any other way. you were so beautiful to him, singing your heart out to your favourite artist and bursting into tears in the middle of your favourite song. he’d been practically ready to cry himself, the pain in his chest was excruciating, he’d never felt this way before.
he’d never impulsively bought so much stuff for someone before despite the fact that he was a broke college student. he’d never purposely humiliate himself to make another person laugh until their stomach hurt before. he’d never cheer up instantly at just the thought of a person before. he’d never put himself through torturous hours of reading unintelligible literature to see someone’s face brighten up before. and at the end of the day, it was you who had brought out all of that in him, and he’d only realized that while hearing you screech out the lyrics to your favourite song. what an idiot i am.
he’d never seen himself as an [artistname] fan ever, but after that concert, just their association to you was enough to make them his favourite too.
by the time exams rolled around, you were both in academic weapon mode, sitting side by side for hours without a word uttered, simply focused on studying. you loved it though, the intimate environment, the reassurance of someone facing the same daunting task as you, and having them willing to help out where you struggled, it was comforting.
during the exam, you never thought you’d been so nervous in your life. prior, every subject was fine except for astrophysics, which was why satoru devoted so much of his time to tutoring you. mid-exam, the full anxiety hit. your leg was bouncing up and down so fast it couldve compared to gamma ray frequencies, you were chewing the inside of your cheek so hard you tasted metal. this anxiety that overtook you was so painful that you considered leaving and just failing the exam. but at the thought of failing, your stomach churned anew. your face paled and you were on the cusp of hyperventilating...
your eyes darted around frantically, but suddenly you were snapped out of your trance when you saw the spaceship-themed pencil in your hand, and the ivory-haired boy sitting a couple rows down who had given it to you.
focus, y/n, remember everything he taught you. just breathe.
satoru spotted you in his peripheral vision, and glanced up when he saw you shaking. when he saw your pale, panicked face staring down at your paper, he almost stood up and abandoned his exam right then and there just to comfort you. what he was already doing was dangerous enough, as in this prestigious of a school, just looking at you was enough to get him flagged for cheating, but satoru couldnt give a flying fuck about his exam right now, not when you were sitting there looking so shaken.
come on, my strong girl, i dont need you to remember everything i taught you right now, i just need you to breathe.
you both locked eyes, and a small, comforting smile graced his face. a strange calm washed over you. how does he have this kind of effect on you? you cant remember the last then when anyone else has made you feel so safe. you take a deep breath and calm your mind. you couldn't give up on this exam now, you couldn't let your combined hard work go to waste. you needed to pass this exam, if not for you, then for him.
upon seeing the determined look on your face, satoru’s shoulders visibly relaxed, and he was able to finish the rest of the exam with no difficulty. after you two left the exam hall he insisted on taking you out for the rest of the day. you two ended up going to a random sushi restaurant and eating away the lingering stress, then going back to your place to watch movies and eat ice cream.
it was the little things like this that you cherished so much about satoru. he saw you. he would take you to a sushi restaurant that he knew you loved, would buy your favourite ice cream, and pick out the movies you wanted to watch. despite your constant nagging for him to be selfish just once and pick a movie he wants, he always insisted that ‘i’m happy if youre happy’
when you two got your exam marks back, you were too nervous to even open the package, instead letting satoru look at it first and deciding whether or not you should be concerned based on his reaction.
“you sure, y/n? this feels like an invasion of privac—”
“just open the damn letter, satoru.”
he huffed out a sigh and muttered something about so bossy while unfolding the page, skimming over it to find your grade. you held your breath so hard you felt lightheaded. you saw the quirk of his eyebrows when he finally found your grades
...
he slowly looks and stares at you with as stoic of an expression as he could muster, and when you finally feel like you're going to burst into tears from the anticipation, his face lights up in happiness, an 'i told you so' laugh bubbling from his chest.
“cmon, you have to look at this, y/n! you did incredible! probably better than me!”
“what?!? give me that shit!”
you grabbed the paper out of his hand and skimmed over it.
. . .
Astrophysics Final Cumulative — 89%
you practically jumped out of your skin.
“oh-oh my God! satoru! this is insane??” you squeal.
you’re so ecstatic you don't even realize you’re jumping on him for a bear hug, the intimacy of it lost on you with the excitement
“this is all because of you, yknow that? thank you so much, toru! you’re such a lifesaver!
the intimacy, however, was definitely not lost on him. he felt a flush rising to the tips of his ears from the praise. he wasn't even going to begin to think about the nickname you’d picked for him—he’d go insane. his arms hung loosely by his side for a second but then slowly found themselves supporting your weight off the ground.
“what are you talking about?” he laughs breathlessly, “y/n this was all because of your hard work, not me. i knew you would do amazing, my smart girl.” he was so proud he couldn't even describe it, even if he flunked all his exams now it wouldn't matter to him anymore, nothing could ruin this moment for him.
the hours of satoru drilling equations in your head paid off! to be honest before opening your grade package you were more scared of letting him down than failing the course and having to retake it, but it all ended out okay.
satoru ended with a 100 in astrophysics (obviously), and much to your annoyance he got a 96 on his english final, and then proceeded to brag to your face for hours as you had only received a 92 and you’d taught him literally everything he knew.
the day after the results came out, you two received your schedules for the new semester, to fortunately find out that you two shared almost every class! not that the workload would be easier, you already had an essay due for “ethical hacking,” a course satoru had convinced you to take, as it was just “coding but for polite people.” the only class you two differed was him taking advanced astrophysics and astronomy (yuck??) and you instead took classic literature as an art.
he invited you over that day, texted you saying how there were "urgent matters to be attended to,” yeah right, he probably just wanted to show off another long ass physics problem that he’d finished before anyone in his class.
regardless, you still ended up getting dressed to go over anyway, why? you didn't know, neither would you admit it to yourself.
after a while you show up at the door to his dorm, he took a solid minute to answer, despite you telling him that you’d be over in 5
30 seconds..
45 seconds..
“y/n! you’re here” he exclaims breathlessly with a shit-eating grin on face, “come inside! like right now! i wanna show you something!”
"did usain fucking bolt chase you to the door? why are you so out of breath?"
"it's nice to see you too" he quips back, unbothered
your lips quirk up and you huff, letting him drag you inside like a giddy child. his bedroom is dark, with the curtains drawn and a lazy fluorescent glow coming from the moon outside, illuminating the small space. his messy white hair and gray, worn out digimon hoodie doing nothing to stand out from the literal geek-fest that was satoru gojo's dorm room.
“well, what is it satoru? y'know i have a project due, like, next week that i should really be writing up right now-”
he flicks on the light switch.
you freeze.
the sight before you is gentle and unimaginable. soft stars, ethereal in their beauty, slowly spinning around the room. you marvel at the sight around you, a makeshift planetarium, all of the planets of the solar system and more shining like crystals. it takes a solid minute before you can conjure up any words.
“cool, isn't it?” satoru asks excitedly, “i made it myself! d’ya like it??”
you stare at him wordlessly, like it? like it? you've never seen something like it in your mouth. a strangled gasp leaves you before you laugh breathlessly
“wow.. toru…” you choke out "how—? when—?"
he smiles so hard you think you can see your reflection in the whites of his teeth.
“come stargaze with me” he says gently, patting a spot on the ground beside him, beckoning you to sit. there’s snacks lazily strewn all across the room. kitkat wrappers, sugary energy drinks, and an unopened pack of your favourite sour skittles, the one he definitely wont tell you he was saving just for you despite them being his favourite candy too. he notices your eyes catching on it and grabs it, looking away while he passing it to you. if you didn’t know better you’d say he looked.. nervous, right now.
“its so beautiful satoru, really” you assure him, noticing his anxiety. his lips quirk up into a soft smile and you can feel his head tilt towards you, white hair whispering against the blankets thrown across the floor. he hums, and his voice is soft, stripped of all its usual stoicness
“arent they?” he murmurs, eyes tracing the star clusters with uncanny focus, “the real stars fit together so perfectly, like puzzle pieces..”
the room suddenly feels close, intimate. your arm brushes his, and his warm, solid presence makes something in your gut clench. satoru points above you somewhere on his star map, fingers tracing invisible lines across the ceiling, “thats capella, the most luminous star in auriga.”
"whats auriga?"
"you're telling me you got an A on your physics exam and you don't even know what auriga is? i knew you must've cheated" he quips.
"whatever, i forgot all that shit the second i left the exam hall."
"it might 'just be an exam' to you, but to me, it's everything." he murmurs, so earnestly that you can't help but glance over at him
his voice is barely above a whisper now, his gaze still distant like he can see something you can’t.
you see his lips tilt up into a lazy smile, a quiet sense of pride in it “yknow, i bought the projector, spent weeks messing around with it ‘till i got it just right, and just now does it feel like i finally completed it."
he doesn't say why, he doesn't need to, but your thoughts fill in the gaps anyway. a makeshift planetarium in the middle of exams. late nights, dark circles under his eyes, hair always a mess, coffee-stained sleeves.
“has anyone seen it in action before this?” you ask hesitantly, would that sound too possessive, oh no, you didn't want to give him the impression that only you were good enough to see it and—what the hell? since when did you overthink your interactions with satoru so much?? these stupid stars must be doing some physics shit to your brain.
“nah” he hums, “you’re the only person ive asked” he remarks casually, so casually that you don't see the way his shoulders tense when you scrutinize him. before you could comment on it, he switches the subject again, adding abruptly,
“yknow what lyra means?”
“nope, what's it mean?”
“lyra,” he says, turning back to the ceiling, “was a harpist. for the greek god orpheus.”
he points a finger up at the constellation, tracing its lines like he could play a melody across them.
“some say she became the constellation when she died. so she could be his muse forever”
his voice was quiet, almost reverent, and the words hung in the air. something in the way he speaks makes your heart flutter, he seemed so passionate about this. where he was all math and stars, you were all literature and art. yet it didn't matter, the way he explained things made it feel like you’ve known this information your whole life.
he continues to ramble on about greek mythology and their correlation to the night sky, meanwhile you just lay on your stomach with your head resting on your hands and your feet casually kicking back and forth, tossing skittles into your mouth as he talks about orion and the pleiades. this goes on for the better portion of a half hour.
as he talks you focus more on him than his words. his bright cheerful eyes that you've only seen glimmer like then when he speaks of the night, his arms gesticulating wildly, as if he were to draw out the information from the world with his hands alone. he tells you about star clusters and binary systems, ancient constellations and the stories behind them. he points at the stars, tracing them with long, pale fingers, like he’s the one who hung them up in the heavens.
you listen attentively to him while toying with the jellycat keychain on your backpack, but you can’t look away from him for longer than a few seconds because his enthusiasm is nearly contagious; he’s so invested, so utterly passionate even if you don't quite grasp most of the concepts. when he finally gets to a point where he’s run out of things to say, he freezes. realizing that he’s just been talking your ear off for a good 30 minutes.
“god, i'm so sorry, i didnt mean to bore you. i-i talk too much i know-” he starts frantically.
you cut him off, shaking your head, “nah” you say softly, shifting closer without realizing it. he’s warm, radiating heat like a living furnace, and you have to resist the urge to press even closer. “i like listening.”
he hums, laying his head back and tilting it up just slightly to look at you, “most people zone out after a couple minutes” he says with a tired laugh, fingers picking absently at a loose thread on the blanket.
“well most people are morons, you told me that yourself” you counter back, earning a tired snicker from him.
satoru lets out a sigh, closing his eyes momentarily. he seems more vulnerable this way, less like the untouchable genius and more like a weary young man who’s been running on too much caffeine and not enough sleep.
“y’know,” he murmurs, “sometimes i wonder if any of this is even worth it. with astronomy and everything”
his voice is soft but flat, devoid of cockiness. its a rare moment of vulnerability, and you want to hold it gently in your palms and never let it go.
“it is,” you find yourself chiding softly, “the stars, the theories, the knowledge… it’s brilliant. you are brilliant.”
he opens his eyes again, turning his head to look at you with an expression you can't quite read. his face is closer now, only inches away. you can count the freckles on his nose bridge if you tried to.
for a moment, you think you see a flash of insecurity in his eyes, a hint of something raw and unguarded. but then its gone, replaced with his usual lazy grin.
“flattery, huh?” he quips, and there's a teasing edge to his tone, "didn't think it was your style.”
you roll your eyes, swatting his arm playfully, “oh, shut up.”
he doesn't move away—just lets you swat him, his grin widening, alive and brilliant. There's something undeniably alive in the way he looks at you now, a childishness only you could bring out of him
“yeah? make me then.” satoru challenges lowly, almost absentmindedly, voice laced with amusement. his fingers twitch against the blanket like he’s restraining himself from reaching out
oh.
oh?
the air between you two is thick with something unspoken and electric. you can feel your heartbeat thudding loud enough to drown out the hum of the projector above you both. satoru firmly presses a pillow to his chest to make sure the sound of his head racing wouldn't be audible—as if that would do any help.
upon realizing your silence, he suddenly backtracks. satoru’s expression shifts from smug to surprised when he realizes the implications of his own words. a hint of red tinges his cheeks and the tips of his ears, an unfamiliar sight, and it's kind of adorable how such a simple statement could throw him off. a prodigy, a teenager who recreated the galaxy in his dorm bedroom just to impress you, and yet he’s thrown off by the implication of kissing you.
he clears his throat, trying to regain his composure, but his gaze keeps flickering to your lips—just brief, fleeting glances that betray his sudden unease.
“i-i didn't mean-i don't want-” he starts, but you’re already grinning in anticipation
“oh, i think you did.”
fuck.
satoru’s entire face flushes—a rare, glorious sight. his usually effortless composure cracks like thin use under the weight of his own thoughts. he uses his knuckle to push his glasses back up his nose, and chews the inside of his cheek nervously.
he opens and closes his mouth twice before letting out a strangled noise. “i—that was not what i meant.”
shit, he thinks, if she keeps looking at me like that, i wont be able to survive it.
you lean towards him. and his glasses slide back down his nose slightly as he jerks back, but there is no real escape now. you’ve got him cornered between blankets and your smug little grin. the stars above you both don't move fast enough to hide the disaster in progress.
“oh?” you laugh, enjoying this moment of docility from him. seeing satoru so flustered, so taken aback by his own slip-up, sparks a kind of perverse joy within you. you shift closer, leaning in until your faces are mere inches apart. you can smell his shampoo, can see every fleck of color in his irises. you wonder if he can feel your breath of his chin.
“then what did you mean?” you murmur, the question laced with a teasing challenge.
satoru swallows repeatedly, a flush on his cheeks spreading to the tips of his ears. he looks away and fidgets with the ridiculous jellycat keychain that he’d bought you attached to your backpack. if i knew you liked stuffed animals so much, i would've bought you more he thinks absentmindedly
he’s never been this flustered, always holding his own—in a conversation, in a room—hell, he’s talked to some of the most advanced rocket scientists in the world without floundering as helplessly as he is now. you look beautiful smug, so unbearably pleased with yourself, and he should be annoyed, he really should.
but that's not what he’s feeling right now.
“i just-” he stutters, trying and failing to come up with a believable excuse, he completely blanks, failing to find anything to deny what his heart so yearns for at this moment. with a sigh, he breathes out,
“i just really, really want to kiss you right now.” shit, shit, shit!
…
you freeze, the sudden burst of blunt honesty catching you off-guard. you’d been ready for his denial, excuses, even more flustered deflection. this was a game you got used to, pushing him into a corner and watching him justify his way out of it, a memorized dance. not this raw, unfiltered confession.
for a moment, you just stare at him, your heart doing somersaults in your chest. you can see the flicker of panic in his eyes, like he’s scared that he’s said too much too fast and you wouldn’t reciprocate. oh my sweet boy, you think, as if i would do something that cruel to you
with a huge goofy smile finding its way on your face, you find yourself whispering, “so do it, then.”
it’s like his brain does a record scratch. he practically short-circuits. his eyes widen comically, the flush spreading across his cheeks deepening to a beautiful scarlet. he looks stunned, like he can’t quite believe what he’s hearing.
then, without another word, he practically pounces on you.
his mouth meets yours in a kiss that feels like a supernova. explosive, messy, overwhelming. he was clearly inexperienced, but if anything that only made you giddier. his hands slide into your hair, tangling tight as he draws you closer. his kiss is hungry, desperate like he’s been holding back for his whole life.
satoru freezes mid-kiss—his lips still pressed against yours, warm and achingly soft. his hands stay tangled in your hair like he’s afraid you’ll vanish if he lets go.
then, slowly, he pulls back just enough to look at you. his glasses are askew again (how do they keep doing that?), his breath uneven. the stars above don't seem nearly as bright anymore—not compared to the devastating smile on his face.
“...was-was that okay?” he murmurs softly after a beat—so quiet it almost sounds unsure coming from someone usually so confident in his words.
“more than okay, ‘toru.” you point to a random huge star on his ceiling, "what's that one?” you ask with a sly grin as you pull him back into another kiss.
he makes a strangled noise in his throat. totally thrown off. under normal conditions he’d be able to tell you everything about any star, hell, probably even its current latitudinal and longitudinal coordinates. but right now the only thing he could get out is
“our s-sun.. that’s mmf just the sun..”
you giggle against his lips and point at another one, seemingly more niche than the literal sun. “yeah? and what about that one?”
satoru chokes on a laugh against your lips, his entire body shuddering. his grip tightens in your hair like he’s trying to anchor himself—like if he lets go, you’ll both spiral into some inexplicable black hole of sheer chaos.
“y-you want me to—to name planets right now?” his voice is wrecked already, uneven and breathless between kisses. he tries (and fails) to sound indignant when all you can feel is how fast his heart is pounding under your palm where it presses against his hoodie.
satoru’s eyes follow your finger to the ceiling, his gaze landing on a random star cluster. “that one?” he rasps out, breath still uneven, “uh-”
his already muddled brain stutters as he wracks through his mental catalogue for information. even through the haze of you—your proximity, your vanilla perfume, the way your body is pressed against his in a way he’d never thought he’d admit he wants this badly—he manages to pull out some details.
“ursa minor,” he pants out. “small, part of the little bear constellation.”
“little bear? sounds cute. tell me more about it.” you grin
oh surely you must be trying to kill me
he groans so hard that you think he’ll just give up, but then—ever the show-off, even in this state—he manages
“its got some notable stars,” he manages, trying desperately to focus anywhere other than the way your body is pressed against him. “like polaris, the north star, and kochab-”
his sentence breaks off into a low moan as your fingers brush the sensitive nape of his neck, sending a shiver of electricity across his skin.
he tries to continue, but it’s difficult with you touching him like this. “I-I—”
he lets out a strangled gasp, his hands gripping at your shoulders like a lifeline. “i cant—i cant think, i cant—”
you pull away for all of two seconds, and satoru lets out a deep shuddering exhale, his chest having like he’s been in a marathon. his cheeks are flushed, his lips kiss-swollen and his glasses are nowhere to be found.
he knows he must look like a mess. his hair is tousled, sticking up in a way thats more ‘i just rolled out of bed’ and less ‘i just made out with the girl i’ve been crushing on for months”
he’s snapped out of his half-dream stupor when he hears you laughing hysterically next to him, as much as he loves the sound, he gets the sinking feeling that he’s the butt of the joke.
“satoru.. PFFT—were-were you holding in your breath the whole time?!” you burst out in giggles again, “no wonder why your face was getting so pale!”
his already flushed cheeks turn even darker at the teasing. he’d forgotten that he did that—held his breath, like a moron.
he mutters something under his breath, something that sounds vaguely like a protest about how he couldn’t exactly help it. he tries to find his glasses, but the area is too large and he could honestly admit that they weren't his top priority right now
you just keep giggling, and even though it was at him, it didn’t make him dislike the sound any less. if anything, he was happy, happy that he had a factor in your joy, he could live as the target of the joke his entire life if he could always see you smile like this. without even realizing what he’s doing, he lifts his arm to gently trace your soft lips, feeling a wave of boldness wash over him.
“you’re so beautiful,” he murmurs, “i can’t comprehend it.” he was so so gone for you, so whipped.
well he must be trying to put you into cardiac arrest, because now it’s your turn to fluster like a schoolgirl. “‘toru,” you mutter sheepishly, “a little warning next time?” he just smiles at that, bright and radiant, deciding now was an appropriate time to comment on the nickname you’ve given him over the past few weeks
“toru, hm? i really like it when you call me that, y’know.”
“you almost socked suguru in the face last week for calling you that” “i said i like it when you call me that,” he clarifies. you roll your eyes but can’t hide the growing smile on your face
“there we go,” he says, noticing your shifting expression, you couldn’t describe the look in his eyes if you tried to, utter devotion, “my beautiful girl.”
you don’t even try to deflect this nickname this time, opting to parry back instead, “aw, don't get all sentimental on me now, sweet boy.”
he laughs and chucks the spaceship eraser at you, both of you lay back down against the sheets, watching the planetarium slowly move above you. satoru, the boy whose head was always lost in the stars, has finally found his.
a/n ; hi gang gang this was so much fun to write (anything except studying for exams lmaoo😭) i’d appreciate any feedback on my writing for the future as this was the first fic i’ve ever written!! i love u so much!! tysm for readinggg:)
