Fives: Kix, in your professional opinion, how do I die?
Kix: Murder. Gang-style execution. We never find your head.
Jesse: *raises hand*
Kix: You slip in a tub.
He's alive - tired, confused and in so much pain yet very much alive. Jesse knows he should be grateful, but the guilt was an overpowering, heavy weight that engulfed that relief.
"It wasn't your fault. You weren't in control." They had told him as though those words would clear him of his actions that day. Clear him of betraying his Commanders, of ordering their execution and leading his men to their grisly demise.
It wasn't your fault.
It wasn't your fault.
But if not his, then who does the blame fall to?
Oops. Angsty AU!Jesse for Day 24. 😬
[ Masterlist ]
Tag list: @loverboy-havocboy @lonewolflupe @brokenphoenix99 @earlgreyci @king-of-docks @whiskygoldwings @the-starry-seas
Jesse stands watch over what little they have left, staring blankly at the grey expanse.
Rating: Teen, No Archive Warnings
Tags: Angst, survivor's guilt, Jesse Lives (and is going through it), Post Order 66
https://archiveofourown.org/works/84545886
@jessixweek
Ramblings about my plans for Jessix Week below the cut.
First of all, very delighted that there's a Jessix Week again so thank you to the organisers for putting this together! I think they're @medic-6116 and @prowlingthunder but please correct me if I'm wrong.
My original plan for Jessix Week was to write one large fic in response to the Alt Prompt: Jesse Lives, maybe with a few other prompts thrown in as well. It would be set in my series Strike Fast in the Dark, an Everyone Lives Clone Rebellion AU, and would be written in the style of two other fics I've written for that series, Knowing You Now and Woven Together. Both fics are a collection of drabbles of various lengths, focusing on a specific ship and characters (Cody/Echo/Fives/Rex). So the plan was to write a Jessix fic in this AU in the same style.
However, a couple of things happened.
As I was writing these various fics, they started to become more disparate from each other. They didn't really fit together in the same way the drabbles of various lengths in the other fics did. There wasn't really a flow between them and some of the fics are vastly different from each other.
I've also been struggling with really bad writers block for the past 6 months. Working on these fics has been slow going and most of them are still WIPs that I need to finish. In an effort to try and rekindle any kind of writing flow, I've been trying to remove any kind of restrictions that might've been getting in the way, like adhering to a strict word count. I've just been trying to write, and that's it. Because of this, fics that I had planned to be drabbles of various lengths have now grown into longer pieces of writing. But it is at least writing! The fact that I've managed to write anything at all is great and I'm trying to be kind to myself about that and see it as at an achievement.
On top of all this, my health, work, and life have really been rough. Being disabled and chronically ill sucks, and work keeps on taking over my life so I have a lot less time and spoons to write.
I looked over all the Jessix Week fics I'm working on and realised that they don't work together as one large fic like I had originally planned. So rather than one large fic in response to one prompt, I've ended up with about 7-8 smaller fics, all in response to the same prompt. Well, one fic and a bunch of wips tbh, I still have to finish most of them *sobs*. They're all in response to the Alt Prompt: Jesse Lives, but I'm going to space out when I post them so I'm not spamming a bunch of posts on the same day. Though let's be real, I'll probably still be working on them up until the end of June 😂
