If I Love You, Beware
Series Title/AU: My Baby Brother is the Strongest Character
<<read the synopsis and content warnings first>>
Featuring: Gitae Kim, James Lee/Diego Kang
Content/Trigger Warnings: mild NSFW, MDNI, mentions of sex work, Gitae Kim is a manwhore, Reader is lowkey a freak, James is James
Author's Note: I had Habanera playing on a loop while writing this. Whenever I hear it, I think of Gitae Kim. And Furina, ofc.
Despite what many romance novels and adult videos like to portray, men don’t ejaculate and recover their erections seconds later. After orgasm, a man’s penis enters a refractory period, during which his equipment will remain unresponsive to any and every stimulus.
You won’t lie, you have had your fair share of men, and very few were able to keep up with your desires. The most boners you’ve had in one night from a single man was four, and your fuck buddy passed out immediately after the fourth. You remembered being disappointed. It wasn’t that you didn’t have an orgasm—you’ve had plenty—but you wanted to know how many you could have before your lust subsided completely. Even your old vibrators lost power before you were completely satiated.
Then again, that was back in the “real world,” where the rules were different.
But right here, right now? For the first time ever, you didn’t know if you could keep up.
You’ve lost track of the number of times you’ve done it; by the time your bed partner rolled off you and fell back on his side with a plop. Your drunken haze began to clear and while you didn’t hate this evening, you can’t help but feel a tiny bit regretful, especially as your thighs continued to ache, the chasm between them sore and tender, yet still unsatisfied.
You felt your hair move. You sighed as your dark-eyed partner started twirling a strand of your hair. His own jet-black fringes, originally combed back with only a cowlick touching his face, was now a complete mess; made him look softer, maybe even kinder.
“You look displeased,” he stated in Spanish, “or are you still hungry?”
You bring your legs closer together. You were itching for more, but you hated that smug smile on his face. “Some hungers should be starved.”
“I don’t think you should be saying that after everything.” He held up a pack of XL condoms and shook it, revealing that it was empty.
“There is no way we used all of those.” You may have been intoxicated and lost count of the positions that you two have been in, but you were certain that you didn’t just go through 24 condoms in one night.
Your Juan Pérez remained stone-faced.
“Did we?”
Finally, his facade cracked and he chuckled. “We didn’t use all of them. I’ve already used up half before you,” he explained calmly, though his eyes sparkled with mischief. He was waiting for you to blow up, likely thinking you’d be jealous or resentful.
But he wasn’t really anybody to you. He was just a fuck. You didn’t care if he slept with other people.
However, you needed to know.
You looked up at the ceiling and asked, “You’re not married, are you?”
“You’re asking me that now?”
“Answer the question.”
There was a pause as he examined your expression. He finally said, “No, I’m not married.”
“Girlfriend?”
“I have many lovers.”
But no girlfriend it seemed. “Good.”
“How surprising. Usually, when I say that, my partner goes ballistic and I have to ask her to leave.”
“You’re an asshole.” You then turned to face him. “But as long as you’re not committed to one person, I can rest easy.”
“You’ve lost me.”
“Don’t get married.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever had that one before.” Certainly not from a woman, were the words left unspoken.
“I knew a man who loved his ladies.”
“You’d be hard pressed to find a man who doesn’t, unless he plays for the other team.”
You let out a snort of derision. Then you continued, “He had a wife and he still played around… he had many illegitimate children—those poor kids—he didn’t like any of them, you know? He didn’t care that they were born. He just wanted to have fun. You can have fun, but don’t get married, don’t promise devotion if you can’t provide it.”
“Why are you telling me this?”
It was your turn to stay quiet for a moment as you stared at his face. “You remind me of him. I wasn’t too fond of that man but… I regret not warning him.”
Your partner quirked an eyebrow. “You seem passionate about this.”
“Passionate? God, no. I’ve never been passionate about anything.”
“I beg to differ. You were quite eager tonight, and I mean that as a compliment. Usually I need more than one lady to keep up with my needs.”
Ignoring the rather obvious bait, you asked him, “Wanna hear something interesting?”
He seemed disappointed for a moment before nodding. “Sure.”
“Apparently, I have a brain injury that’s been messing with my recall—my memories from when I was a teenager are so faint I don’t even know what I’ve lost. But I can remember things from way back when I was younger, and I don’t mean elementary school young—I remember being inside the womb.”
“That’s… that is fascinating.”
“Told you.” You smiled wryly. “I remember being so weak that I couldn’t roll over on my stomach. When I raised my hand like this—” you reached for the ceiling, spreading your fingers “—it was definitely a newborn’s hand. I remember that there was a mobile above me. It wasn’t anything special, just a typical mobile with two goldfish and a bunch of seashells going round and round over my head. The woman who gave birth to me was crying. I can’t see her face no matter what. She kept saying that she failed and blamed me for being born as a girl. She did that a lot, and she was always crying, so I don’t know if minutes or days had passed. But in one moment, I opened my eyes and I saw that mobile still going round and round above me, two goldfish chasing after each other, and then I saw my mother’s feet, they were in the air, too.”
“...”
“Interesting, right? I’ve forgotten years of my life, and I’m scared of losing more, but my brain can’t seem to forget that memory. I don’t mind forgetting but something inside me refuses to let go. No matter how hard I look back, I can’t see her face, but I can still hear her cries and I still see her feet, suspended in the air with those plastic fish.” Feeling the exhaustion creep in, you closed your eyes and, before passing out, you said with a sigh, “Don’t promise what you can’t give.”
When Gitae Kim exhaled, his assistant and the madame of this establishment flinched in unison. He’s had every available woman in this brothel, and the one across the street, and the one in the neighboring city, but every single one of them left him disappointed.
He had no habit of hitting or berating his bed partners, whether he paid them or not, but somehow all these girls irritated him.
The way they touched him, the way they mewled, the way they fawned over him—everything he used to crave annoyed him now.
He rose to his feet without warning and everyone scrambled out of his way. He didn’t bother to zip up before leaving the room.
The assistant handed the briefcase of cash to the madame before chasing after Gitae.
“Boss, should we drive to the next brothel?”
Gitae clicked his tongue, shaving years off the poor man’s life. “No.” He got inside the back of the car. “Drive me to a bar.”
It didn’t take long for Gitae to catch the eye of a beautiful woman. She was curvaceous with long legs, the dream of any man. He wasted no time in bedding her. He let her take the lead and even encouraged her to kiss him as he pistoned in and out of her.
After his first release, he had no desire for another round and remained still on his side of the bed.
“Are you all right?” she asked, snuggling next to him. “You look disappointed.”
He was still hungry. “I was just thinking.”
“You’re so rude,” she joked. “This is the part where you should be reassuring me that I was amazing, even if it isn’t true.”
This would be the time where his erection would have returned and he’d eat her again. But Gitae’s hunger didn’t want her. He didn’t know what he wanted.
When he didn’t say anything, the woman tilted her head. “What’re you thinking about?”
“I want something.” He shut his eyes. “I keep looking but I can’t find it, but I don’t even know what it is.”
After a while, the woman spoke up again, “Oh, dear, I think I know what’s happening.”
“I’m open to suggestions.”
“It’s not an it, señor,”[1] she clarified, “you’re yearning for someone.”
“Don’t be silly.”
“I have three brothers. I’ve seen that look of regrets way too many times.”
“Regret?”
“Uh-huh. The regret of letting the one get away.”
Gitae finally opened his eyes to glare at her.
She laughed. “Did you break up recently? Did you decide to let a friend or brother keep her? Don’t tell me you cheated on her.”
“I think you have drunk too much.” Gitae was not interested in any of this. He didn’t bother to cover up as he stood and searched for his pants.
“If you don’t believe me, then ask any woman and she will tell you, you’re clearly in love,” she yelled as he stepped outside.
“Goodbye.” He slammed the door.
He called for his assistant and demanded to be driven to the nearest brothel.
Gitae Kim in love? Preposterous.
Over two years have passed since then. He's returned to his father's homeland and he's yet to find what he's been searching for.
“So it’s true.” Diego Kang, formerly known as James Lee, walked into Gitae Kim’s suite with the usual unnervingly serene smile. His formerly wild red hair was now an obnoxious pink.
“I heard that you sent the ladies home.” He looked around the room. “Were they too plain for your taste?”
Gitae Kim didn't move from his armchair, nor did he bother to cross his legs. Anyone who walked into his hotel room had a full view of everything under his robe. “No.”
“Did they offend you in some way?”
“They did their job. There was no reason to keep them around,” Gitae grumbled. “What brings you here?”
“I’m here to check up on you, of course.”
“To make sure I don’t go around causing discord?”
Diego just continued to smile.
“I told you,” Gitae sighed, “I’m only here as a layover, I don’t intend to stay for long.”
“Good. We don’t have much use for you at the moment so lay low in Mexico until we call for you.”
Gitae finally got up from his chair and approached Diego with a steady gaze. “Did that cheap hair dye finally seep into your brain? I’m not your dog, James Lee.”
Diego didn’t falter as he replied, “I misspoke. I’m merely giving you a polite reminder that the stage for your return hasn’t been prepared so it’s best to stay in Mexico.”
Satisfied, Gitae turned around and went to grab a bag of chips from his stash.
“You seem awfully ornery today,” the pink-haired pretty boy said. For whatever reason, he was still here.
“I received a visit from an annoying guest.”
“I heard a rumor that you have been going around Southeast Asia looking for someone.”
So that’s why he was still here.
Gitae said nothing else, opting to eat instead.
Diego cocked his head to the side. “I heard you’re looking for a woman.”
Gitae clicked his tongue.
The pink freak raised his hands in the air and shook his head. “Make no mistake, I’m not trying to make fun of you. If it’s true, then I congratulate you.”
“Hah?”
In a split second, Diego was right in front of him again, wearing a psychotic smile. It reminded Gitae of the time James Lee fought with a powerful opponent, but rather than bloodlust, his expression now held something else.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Love is a precious thing. I’m glad you found yours.”
“???”
Diego’s pocket played a familiar melody—the chorus that plays when a bride walks down the aisle. “Speak of the devil.” He took a step back and pulled out his phone, his sinister grin softening into something more normal. “My job here is done so I’ll be going now.”
Before leaving, he threw one last look at Gitae. “I know you won't be in Korea for long, but you shouldn’t stay cooped up in here all day. It’s bad for the skin.”
Ugh.
Gitae shoved a handful of chips into his mouth. Outside of combat, he never understood that freak.
***
You were debating between two lipsticks when DG barreled into you from behind.
“Sorry I’m late, noona.”
“It’s fine.”
“Were you lonely? Do you want to hit me as punishment?”
“First things first, get your hands off me.”
“Whoops. Sorry.” He pulled his arms away from your waist, but he looked hardly apologetic.
After the whole Jiho Park disaster, you and Diego have been hanging out more often. To be more precise, you found him “running into” you a lot: in the grocery store; in your building elevator despite him living in a different condo; in your 24/7 pharmacy while you’re buying sanitary napkins… You decided that it was easier to just invite him and pretend that your relationship’s normal.
Today, you were restocking your makeup collection since everything you owned was turned to ash. Gun wanted to come with you, but he and Goo had a job, and Samuel’s schedule was packed full.
You held up the tubes in front of Diego, who was very familiar with makeup. “Jungle Red or Indulgent Sunrise?”
“These are way more colorful than your usual pick.”
“Yes, well, I already have my workplace makeup down, but I want something more festive for special occasions.”
“Like our wedding—”
“Like dates. So…” You showed off your left knuckle, a line of velvet, “Jungle Red, or—” you raised your right knuckle, which had a line of orange-pink “—Indulgent Sunrise?”
Diego glanced between colors before saying, “I’m not sure. They both look good on you.”
“Well, duh. You think I don’t know what looks good on me? I’m trying to decide which is better.”
“Hm… it’s hard to say. Since you’re planning to use them on dates, why not see which looks better as a kiss mark,” he offered, silver eyes twinkling.
“That’s not a bad idea.”
“Wait, what? I was joking.”
“I know, but both look great on me, I’ve been debating for five minutes. Maybe this will help me make up my mind.”
You put on Jungle Red first and then kissed the back of your left hand. You wiped your lips, applied Indulgent Sunrise, and kissed your right fist.
You put down the lipsticks and held your hands under the light. “Yeah, this didn’t help. What do you think, Diego?”
He didn’t reply and you had to call his name again. “What’re you spacing out for?”
Diego, who was right behind you, snaked his arms under yours and intertwined your fingers, raising your hands closer to the light. “Your kiss marks are adorable, noona.”
“Um, okay?”
He fell silent again, his breathing becoming more shallow over your shoulder while he admired the lipstick marks.
“So…? Which one should I get?”
“Just get them both.”
“You know how I feel about buying more than what I need—”
“Then I’ll buy them for you.” His grip tightened. “You look pretty in both.”
[1] Señor. Spanish for "mister" or "sir."
a/n: Not Gitae's one night stand being our fairy godmother/Cupid LOL. Also, James, your inner cuck is showing and you don't even know it. 🙄
taglist: @sm3156, @placid-plastic, @yin-yun, @ixchelhernandez4, @janeisnotonline, @cocooola, @ficrepostblog, @peachmangoe, @saltyeli, @pauxf013, @sugarrushbell, @sleepingzzzzz, @eyeless-kun, @sh0jun, @kitty-chan33, @elizaliza159, @noxus123, @linasxoxo, @luckyangelballoon, @misshyori, @rosehoneycomb, @sparrowwithaquill
Disclaimer: The images used do not belong to me. The screencaptures are from Ep. 497, 584, 531 & 367 - Lookism, Webtoon
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