Just a life blah
My life just can't stop throwing crap, good or bad, my way. I got the job I wanted at the pay I asked for. I'm getting kittens in 6 weeks. And on top of all that I am having a misscarrage. I didn't know I was even pregnant. I am relieved because now is not the time for me to start a family. Me and my boyfriend aren't where we should be for that. Im also a bit sad since I do want to be a mother. I have since I was little. I'm sad that I won't be able to get to know that potential life, but glad the gods and goddesses knee now this wasn't the right time. Sometimes life and fate are weird. These past few weeks have been that for me. First I had a pregnancy panic. Brushed it off as bloating since I've been eating like shit. Now I knew my intuition was right. My body was telling me that it was pregnant. Now this. I can't wait to start a family, when I'm ready. When I'm able to care for and give that child the best I can and everything it deserves. not living paycheck to paycheck. But thriving in life. So thank you Mother Goddess and Father God. Thank you for seeing that and allowing me to get further in life before that next step. I am not ready for the Mother, I am still the maiden. And thank you for seeing that. I know when I am ready you will know that and help push me to that next stage in life.
