GIVE ME XENOGENDER LOGAN FIC NOW. YOU WANTED DEMANDS SO I'LL GIVE ONE.
TW: crying
"You okay, Lo?”
Janus’s voice was so gentle, his gloved hands holding Logan’s across the table. The logical side nodded, though comets heart raced. Xe had been meaning to come out for over a month, but star hadn’t managed to calm xemself down nearly enough every time com wanted to.
Xe had decided to just bite the bullet and tell him. There wasn’t any point in enduring the discomfort and dysphoria anymore, not when com knew that Janus would accept star in an instant.
“I’m not... I’m not-”
Xe had to take a moment to collect comself, despite knowing how understanding Janus would be. What if he didn't love star anymore? What if he was accepting but avoided Logan after that, eventually breaking up with xem? What if-
"Lo, Logan, it's okay. Anything you need to tell me, it's okay."
Star nodded again, wiping tears beginning to creep out of comets eyes. "I'm not... I'm not a man."
"Okay. That's perfectly fine, okay? I love you so much, sweetheart, and I'm so proud of you, for finding that and being confident enough to tell me."
Logan just nodded, breath still shaky.
"Do you know what you are, if not a man?"
"I'm- I'm nonbinary, but- I use- I use the term caelgender. It's- it's stupid, I-"
"No, it's not stupid, love. What does it mean? Do you want different pronouns, or a different name?"
Logan laced xir fingers in Janus's, taking a deep breath. "It's a gender that's... related to space, and objects in outer space and- all that. I'm okay with my name but I- I use star/stars, com/comet/comself, and xe/xir pronouns, but if you don't want to you can just use they/them-"
"No, Lo, I'll use them if they make you comfortable. I wanna support you, and I don't mind using those pronouns at all."
Series summary: Soulmates are given memories of their past lives when their hands touch. For Virgil and Logan, each memory is happier than the last.
This series was created for @analogicalweek and made in collaboration with the lovely @birdsongisland! They made this amazing piece for this this work; go support them with reblogs so it can be seen!
Credit to birdsongisland for beta reading this as well! You’re input means a lot and I’m truly grateful.
Chapter 2: The Lines Trace Back to You
Chapter Summary: Logan and Virgil share a quiet moment away from their ship as Logan tells stories with the stars.
Day 2 Prompt: Song/Stars
Warnings: none. If there are others please let me know!
WC: 1349
AO3 link
Taglist (ask to be added or removed): @ace-in-a-shopping-cart @janus-is-an-adorable-snek-boi @logans-library @im-an-anxious-wreck @edupunkn00b
The night was still and calm, bringing a quiet respite for the crew of a ship docked on the beach nearby. Waves lapped quietly at the ships hull and lulled even the most dutiful night watcher into a light slumber, entrusting the safety of their fellow shipmates to the vast expanse of peaceful nothing that lay beyond the beach. Soft winds whistled through the sparse trees and kicked up the sand at their bases, irritating the crabs hiding underneath as they hastened to rebury themselves before sunrise. Crickets sang out the last notes of their songs while birds chirped the first of theirs. Up on a nearby hill a man sighed blissfully, hidden from view even from the keenest of eyes and leaning back to relax into the sturdy chest behind him.
Virgil felt a low rumble against his back and smiled, tilting his head back to look at what his designated pillow could be laughing at. Deep green eyes met a deeper blue and not for the first time he felt himself get lost in the other’s gaze. He would sooner throw himself off his own ship in a storm than admit he might be a sap but those eyes had always compromised any notion he might have had that his heart was anything other than soft. A hand came up to cup his jaw and he closed his eyes to feel the ghost of a kiss brush against his forehead. Too soon the feeling passed, replaced instead with the hand crossing over to grip his shoulder and pull him tighter into the heat that radiated off the body behind him. In the chill of the early morning he had never been more grateful to have a living space heater to call his own.
Nuzzling back as Logan rested their chin on top of his head he sighed happily, pouting slightly as another chuckle jostled his position somewhat. He brought his hand up to tap at Logan’s arm to get their attention, snapping out quick motions with his fingers when he was sure he had it.
"What’s so funny?"
“You’re too easy to rile up.” Logan answered affectionately. “I was just thinking how lucky I am to see this side of you. You give orders all day like you were born to the violence of the sea and yet cling to me like a damsel in distress when away from prying eyes. It’s cute.”
Laughing outright as their forearm was bit gently in warning they brought their other hand up to comb through Virgil’s fluffy hair, earning a content purr for their efforts which they figured meant their apologetic offer had been accepted. They leaned back against the tree again, tightening their grip to bring Virgil with them so they could gaze up at the sky. It was still dark enough to see the stars relatively clearly, the barely there threat of dawn lighting the horizon just enough to show the purple of the other’s hair. They hummed softly in triumph as they found what they were looking for, bringing their hand up to point at a cluster of stars.
“Can you see that bright star there? Slightly left of the treeline?” They waited until Virgil tapped his confirmation before continuing. “There are three more dimmer stars that sort of make a line see? And crossing them are three stars with a row of three set right on the edge making a curve shape. Altogether they resemble a swan.”
Virgil tapped their arm again that he understood as he relaxed completely into the secure hold. He always loved to hear Logan talk about stars- a lot of the time the only thing they were used for was navigation, old stories forgotten and rewritten to better suit a life of sailing the seas. But when Logan talked about them there were always stories attached that dated back to Roman philosophers or amazonian astrologists. Where Virgil had been trained to see calculations in the sky Logan told of great battles won and lost, of Great Hunts led by archers on elk and bears doomed to wander the void for eternity- all told with the deep rumbling voice he had grown accustomed to falling asleep to when the night allowed it.
“It’s called Cygnus.” That voice called Virgil’s attention back from his wandering thoughts. “It’s Greek history is quite dreary, as the stories of their gods tend to be. But it’s relevance in Hinduism is quite lovely. It correlates with Brahmamuhurtha which translates to ‘a moment in the universe’. Between 4:24 and 5;12 in the morning is supposed to be a favorable time to do anything important or get a running start to the day. It’s a much better story to whatever family drama the Greek Gods had to earn them a constellation.”
Virgil snorted at the last bit; even if Logan knew almost everything there was to know when it came to Greek, Roman and Norse mythology they held a particular disdain for the dramatic and hyperbolized tragedy that made up the majority of the former’s myths and legends. Often if he needed a distraction from something Virgil would start them up on a rant about who should have talked to who about this certain subject so that this group of people wasn’t doomed to be cursed because of those people’s actions. Once Virgil had left the room to do a small task in the next one over, surprisingly unnoticed by Logan who had continued pacing and ranting like he had never left, voice carrying clearly through the walls all while ripping Zeus a new one for not being able to quote “Just keep it in his pants.”
Deciding the air was much too peaceful to start up another one of those discussions he instead raised his hands so Logan could see them, black nail polish glinting in the first rays of dawn as he signed. “What would you be doing right now, with your moment in the universe? Would you be back home waking up at dawn to feed the cows instead of leading a life of crime?”
Smiling, Logan shook their head. They hadn't thought when they were a teenager that someday they'd be sailing around on a pirates’ ship with one of most ruthless (as far as rumors went) crews in all the seas. They’d been trying to swipe Virgil’s coinpurse, not knowing who he was at the time, and had of course been caught before the bag had even left the pirate’s belt. The moment their skin had touched however, a thousand and one lives had flashed in an instant, leaving them blinking in astonishment into green eyes that glimmered with reserved mischief and buried kindness.
Prayers they hadn’t even known they had had been answered that day as an anonymous envelope containing the money their family had needed was found on their doorstep along with hidden coordinates along the edge that was thankfully overlooked by their mother. They missed her some days but their life had taken a better turn when they had turned up on the boat at the crack of dawn, hauling themself over the railing and waving the envelope at the person who had their face pinned to the deck with their sword before they could breathe a word. Home? That was with Virgil. Looking down at the man still curled comfortably in their lap worrying at his bottom lip they expressed as much in earnest.
“I’d be right here, doing exactly as I am right now. You are my moment always, and there’s nowhere else in the universe that I’d rather be.”
Tracing lines in the freckles on their cheeks, Logan felt Virgil spell out “sap” on their cheekbones, making them grin and lean over to cup the other’s cheeks in their own hands.
“All the lines between the stars- they all trace back to you my love.”
The hill obscured the kiss shared between them from any eyes that may have wandered in their direction, allowing only the stars to bear witness to their moment in the universe.
[image id: a screenshot of Logan with a confused smile. Both hands are held up palms-first. On top of the screenshot is a tweet by Mitch @/HxOvAx that reads, ““men are from mars, women are from venus” implies the existence of at least 6 other local genders of extreme variability, hundreds of thousands of other celestial genders, and possibly infinite extrasolar genders, many beyond what science has currently charted”. /end id]
Summary: Patton is short, but he doesn't really mind it. And honestly? He minds it even less when he finds out the cute new employee can pick him up easy-peasy.
Taglist for This: @jessibbb, @sanderssides-angst, @yalltookmyurlideas
Commissions!! | Buy Me a Kofi!! | Join Casper’s Crew!! | Ao3 Link!!
Notes: Tiny Patton and Remus picking him up. Tiny Patton and Remus picking him up.
Patton… was short. This wasn’t new to him, of course, but sometimes it could really be a pain in the tush. Being five foot one and working in a candy shop meant that sometimes he couldn’t reach the high shelves where all the individually wrapped hard candies were so young’uns couldn’t hurt themselves.
Which was what he was struggling to deal with right now, standing on his tip toes to refill one of the containers (he hadn’t been able to make Ivan and Steve stop flirting long enough to grab the step stool) and hoping he didn’t drop anything and waste stock.
He didn’t mind being short, but gosh being taller would be real nice right now.
Suddenly there was a hand guiding the bag of butterscotch away from the container Patton was trying to fill, and before he could protest, he was yelping because there was hands grabbing his waist and picking him up. Looking down with a flushed red face, trying not to wiggle too much when he was settled onto a shoulder, Patton saw the newest employee grinning up at him.
“Noticed you needed some help, hope this is okay?” Remus asked, patting Patton’s calf with the hand he had around his legs to help keep him balanced.
Oh goodness, he is strong being able to pick him up with as chubby as he was.
“Ah- Well I mean, in the future maybe ask before you pick me up? But uh… yeah this is a big help, thanks!” he said, unable to fight back his flustered giggle.
Remus’ grin grew wider, and Patton forced himself to focus on restocking the butterscotch instead of the swoop of butterflies in his belly at just how attractive that grin was.
Honestly, Patton hadn’t been expecting for there to be another instance where he was picked up. He’d moved the step stool to a new spot since Ivan and Steve kept flirting in that one, and nothing was too high for him to restock or clean with that thing.
He supposed physically picking him up and moving him away from the counter was one way to keep him from yelling at an entitled mother who thought her custom box of chocolates for her daughter wasn’t supposed to be as expensive as it was.
It was… also a way to distract him from his anger by making him remember just how gay he was for Remus. Which was a little bit of an issue considering Patton may be manager, but Logan was store owner and if de caught Remus saying what he was to the now scandalized mother, de would fire both of them. Remus for saying it and Patton for allowing it.
“Ah, Remus, please step back,” he said softly, grabbing his arm and catching Steve’s attention, nodding him in the direction of the woman.
Times like these, Patton was so grateful that Steve was so good at customer service.
Remus stepped back, following Patton when he gestured for him to do so.
They stepped into a supply closet, Patton not expecting to hear the click of the door closing behind them but forcing himself to not think about that right now because he needed to be professional and he couldn’t think about kissing someone who worked under him.
“I really appreciate you pulling me back out there,” he started, turning to face Remus before looking up for the light string, “but you can’t- dang it, I can’t reach that.”
Remus, without saying anything and wearing an amused grin, reached forward and pulled once on the chain.
Patton refused to acknowledge the showcasing of height made his face more red because he did not want to think about his attraction to Remus right now.
“Uh… thank you. Anyway, you can’t talk to customers like that, whether they’re rude or not-”
“You looked pretty close to ripping her head off yourself,” Remus commented, his grin growing when Patton spluttered a little in response.
“Yeah, well I just…” Patton sighed, crossing his arms over his chest and pursing his lips a little in a small pout, “she was calling Lo mean things, and deir my friend not just my boss.”
Remus nodded, making a vague sound of agreement that had Patton looking back up at him to see-
Oh. Oh. He is definitely watching his mouth, oh goodness.
“Yeah I heard, I’ve got ears. And eyes.”
“Uh… what does… your vision have to do with anything?” Patton asked, taking a step back and forcing back a squeak when his back met the wall.
Maybe a closet wasn’t the best decision to have a private conversation.
“Nothing important. Just noticing the cute manager and how flustered he gets around me. Say, question,” Remus said, interrupting Patton before he could even respond to the flirt.
“Oh, uh, answer,” he responded, his mind a little scrambled because Remus had just taken two steps closer and now there was barely two feet between them.
“What’s the policy on dating here?” he asked, taking one more step forward.
If Patton’s face wasn’t red before, it sure as heck was now.
“It’s um. It’s frowned upon.”
“Cool, I quit then,” Remus said and then he was tilting Patton’s face upwards just a bit more so he could place a kiss on his lips.
And well… if he quit, then Patton was going to let himself enjoy this.
“Patton,” Logan started, arms crossed over deir chest as de looked over deir glasses at Patton.
“Logan,” Patton responded, struggling not to giggle as he cupped his hand over the two hickeys on his neck, his other hand supporting his elbow as he stood in Logan’s office.
Percy, the one person in the candy shop who was fed up with all the flirting, had ended up walking in on him and Remus while they were kissing and had ratted Patton out to Logan.
Well… kissing was a light word for it, but Patton couldn’t find it in himself to care at this exact moment.
Logan sighed, rubbing deir temple while Patton finally let out the giggles he’d been struggling to hold back the last twenty minutes.
“I hope you know I’m going to have to put you on unpaid leave, Pat,” de said, giving Patton a tired look that turned Patton’s grin into a sheepish smile.
“I know now? How long?” he asked, tapping his fingers against his elbow and shifting his feet.
He kind of wanted to leave already. Remus was waiting for him in the employee parking lot.
“A week. Please don’t make out in the shop again, and especially not on the clock,” Logan said, giving Patton a pointed look that had him giggling again.
“Yep! Lesson learned! See you tomorrow!” he said, starting to back out of the room.
Logan frowned in confusion.
“Why tomorrow? Isn’t it your night to make dinner?”
Patton gave Logan a cheeky grin.
“You can cook, can’t you?”
And then he was out the door. Sure, that may not be the nicest way to go about things, and he would definitely be apologizing to dem later for flaking out on his night to cook, but he really wanted to spend some more time with Remus, and he’d promised him a fun time.
With how the twenty minutes in the supply closet went, Patton was honestly inclined to believe that.
When Patton stepped out of the building, Remus stood up from where he was leaning on his truck and waved him over with a grin.
“Hey sunshine, didn’t get fired did you?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at Patton once he was within a reasonable talking distance.
“No, but I’m on unpaid leave for a week.”
Remus blew a raspberry, making Patton giggle.
“Well shit. Bright side though, that means a little more time for us, huh sweetheart?” Remus asked, pulling the passenger door open.
Patton giggled and took a step forward to climb in.
Before he could, Remus had his hands on Patton’s waist and lifted him into the truck. Patton was going to protest, but Remus already his lips on his.
“I’d say that makes the leave worth it,” he said, words a little breathless, when Remus pulled away.
Remus chuckled, pecking his cheek and making him giggle when his mustache tickled his skin.
the ceiling is white. that’s the only thing logan seems to be able to think. white is the color of silence, they think. when you look at it, you see every single color known to man, but it’s so very empty—like screaming to an uncaring void. no one hears you.
lying there, the world is a silent, bright white. it would be better if it were black. when you look at black, you see the absence of all colors. logan thinks that’s more fitting today.
and yet, black absorbs everything, and it’s so loud. there’s no color to be seen, but you don’t feel alone when surrounded by blackness. it’s warmer, almost. at least it feels like something’s there.
but no. for logan, the world is white, and the world is silent.
they feel so alone.
they made it this way. they made the world white, so maybe it is their fault. maybe it’s their fault everything feels empty when it should be full of color.
it’s their fault.
yes, that seems right.
their fault, all of it. the emptiness of the world, the listlessness in their bones, the pain in their chest.
their fault.
they want to cry, they can’t cry. the world is too empty, too numb for tears. they won’t fall.
save for one, that is. pools of water gather in logan’s eyes, but only a single drop falls, slowly trailing its way down their cheek.
they wipe it away, and their finger comes away black.
it’s the eyeliner and the mascara, they know it’s the eyeliner and the mascara they’d put on this morning, but seeing it there, the black coating the very tip of their finger, logan can’t help but feel the black held in that tear is the last bit of feeling they’d had in them.
black is the absence of color, but that’s only what humans see. in reality, black is the presence of all color; each hue of light held within that single shade. black is everything, even if you see nothing.
and now it’s gone. one fallen black tear, and logan’s lost everything.
for @figurative-siren-song‘s Thing!! credits to the fabulous @main-chive and @an-absolute-failure for betaing ( ˘ ³˘)♥ ( ˘ ³˘)♥
Summary: I think the title says it all tbh
Warnings: alcohol mention, insecurity, catastrophizing, Virgil panics some + doesn’t have good self care habits, one (1) curse word, Remus is mentioned
Wordcount: just a little under 6k
Additional note!! The section that begins with “Remy and Janus are cuddling on Remy’s bed...” is a repeat of the previous scene, but from another POV
Virgil is so tired. It feels like every day there’s some new crisis to deal with or important thing to discuss, and he just wants a couple days to himself to unwind a bit.
But since he can’t get that, he wants a few hours to gripe with someone over everything that’s been going down lately.
Roman is way too dramatic for his tastes, and Patton would probably be too nice about what’s happening. So he goes to Logan. (He briefly toys with the idea of going to one of the Others, but things are… tense with them, so he discards it quickly.)
“Yes?” Logan asks, opening the door to their room.
“I was wondering if you, uh, wanted to complain with me about all the stuff that’s been happening lately? There’s been a lot, and you’ve probably had to deal with more of it than me, and I thought you might like to commiserate? It’s chill if you don’t want to, though,” Virgil says, shifting awkwardly.
“You are welcome to join us.” Logan opens the door wider and steps to the side.
“Us?” Virgil echoes, confused, until he goes inside and sees Janus sitting in a beanbag chair, swirling a wine glass idly. “Oh.”
“Lovely to see you too, Virgil,” fae says dryly.
Virgil scrunches up his nose and wonders if getting to complain about all the recent shenanigans is worth spending time in faer company. Janus mimics the expression—is fae mocking him?—and holds up a bottle of wine, shaking it a little to show that it’s still mostly full. Virgil sighs, shrugs, and conjures a plain beanbag and wine glass, collapsing into the former and holding out the latter to Janus. Fae obligingly fills it, and Virgil leans back in his beanbag, sipping it as Logan sits down.
“So what’re we talking about?” Virgil asks.
“Y’know the other day when…”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Virgil squints at Remy.
“Not to be rude,” Logan begins, but Virgil cuts them off.
“What are you doing here?” He demands.
“Real welcoming, Virgil,” Janus remarks snidely.
“He’s intruding on our thing!”
“Yes, and it’s not like you intruded on our thing only a month ago and we were hospitable, right? You totally have the right to snap at Remy.”
“Shut up.”
“Y’all are gossiping, babes,” Remy says. “Why wouldn’t I be here?”
Virgil opens his mouth to protest automatically, then finds that that’s a fair point. Remy does love gossip. He shuts his mouth reluctantly.
“Welcome to the group, Remy,” Janus declares, overexaggerating faer words and smirking at Virgil. He makes a mocking face back but doesn’t comment, crossing his arms as Janus conjures up a beanbag chair for Remy. The little pest. Now everyone but Virgil has a beanbag chair rather than a plain beanbag; this was absolutely deliberate.
Virgil scowls at Janus and sinks further down into his beanbag, letting the conversation flow around him without paying attention to what’s being said. Whatever; at least his seat isn’t a specific shape and therefore can be squished into a different position or turned upside down and still be the same. See any of them try to do that with their chair-shaped beanbags, only good for one shape and if you wanted to shift positions you had to make do with what you had, instead of adjusting the beanbag.
“Virgil?” Logan asks.
“Wh—yeah?”
“Are you alright?”
Virgil pushes himself more upright and sits on his hands. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
“You sure, babes?” Remy tilts his head down to look over his sunglasses at him.
“Yeah.” Virgil forces a smile. “Just… need to readjust my beanbag.” He stands up and flips it over, squishing it in a few spaces until it’s like he wants. The other three watch him in silence, making the affair at least twice as awkward as it would’ve been if they’d ignored him. Virgil sits back down, face red. “What’re we talking about?”
“These two were telling me about something that happened with Roman yesterday?” Remy says.
“Oh my gosh,” Virgil groans. “Okay, what do you already know?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is a crisis, Virgil is having a crisis, a dilemma, a predicament, an emergency; sound the alarms, clang the warning bell, and gather the troops, Virgil has a crush.
This shouldn’t be happening! Not allowed! He’s too emotionally unstable to handle it and will mostly likely make a fool out of himself. Which is also absolutely not allowed.
And! The crush is on Janus, which is yet another not allowed thing. Last Virgil checked, he was still just tolerating faer presence, not getting a crush on faer. That’s just plain rude of his brain, please take it back he doesn’t want it.
He looks up at his ceiling, since that’s as far back as Virgil can roll his eyes without being in pain. Okay, he’s staring his brain down, and he’ll stop having a crush in three, two, one—
He pauses, thinks of Janus, groans. That didn’t work. And to be honest he didn’t really expect it to, but it still? would’ve been nice? if his brain could work with him for once??
Virgil sighs and flops backwards.
Okay, if demanding his brain stop having a crush didn’t work, maybe he can just… avoid faer. Maybe it’s just infatuation or something—doesn’t infatuation happen right after you meet someone? His brain asks. Shut up, he tells it—and if he stays away for a few days it’ll go away. That’s probably it.
He glances over at his minifridge and small hoard of non-perishables and mentally calculates. He’s got enough for about a week, that should be plenty enough time.
Virgil waves his hand and his door locks. There. Now he can just. sit around and avoid thinking about Janus until this crush/infatuation/whatever-it-is goes away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is great, Remy is having a great time, get some bells to ring and a rooftop for him to shout off, because Remy has a crush.
To be accurate, he has three: on Janus, Virgil, and Logan. He isn’t exactly sure when they started, only that he just now realized he has them, but he’s definitely not complaining.
He’s also definitely not going to sit around and pine silently for them or something. If he’s going to get rejected, better to get it over with and work on healing than let himself think there might be a chance for however long. (And, yeah, it would definitely hurt, if one or all of them didn’t like him—hurt a lot—but he’s ignoring that part.) And the revelation is giving him an extra burst of confidence (and it’s not like he didn’t already have that in spades) so he’s going to shoot his shot as soon as possible.
His brain decides the most efficient way to confess to the three of them is to wander around the mindscape until he finds them, so he does that until he bumps into Logan.
“Logan,” Remy declares. “I’m gay.”
“Yes,” Logan says, pulling out their flashcards and flipping through a few of them before pulling one out and showing it to him. “‘We been knew’ that, Remy.”
“Nice,” Remy compliments, throwing an arm around their shoulders. “But you see, my dear nerd, I’m gay for you.” He pokes their chest for emphasis.
Logan turns bright red and alternates between wordlessly gaping and stammering so hard Remy can’t make out anything they’re trying to say. They extract themself from Remy’s arm and smooth out their tie, their blush toning down only slightly.
“I… will have to think on this,” Logan says finally, which Remy interprets as Logan for ‘too gay rn; need some time to calm down and consider my feelings’.
“Cool; take all the time you need,” Remy tells them, flashing them a peace sign. “I’m gonna go find Janus and Virgil, see you in a bit.”
“Alright,” Logan says, and Remy takes that as his cue to wander off in search of his other two crushes.
The next one he runs into is Janus, who he immediately tells “I’m gay.”
“No,” fae snarks. “I thought you were straight.”
Remy gasps and scoffs offendedly (at the same time, because his need to be Dramatic™ at all times overrides any petty things like biology, especially when he’s been teased).
“Well, I was going to say I’m gay for you,” Remy tells faer, pressing a hand to his chest. “But if we’re on such a disconnect I’m just not sure anymore.”
“No, wait!” Janus says. “I’m gay for you too, darling, please.”
Remy immediately decides that any pet names for him are illegal; his face has no right blushing like that just because Janus called him ‘darling’. He covers his face, hoping that’ll hide the blush.
“Fine,” he mutters.
“What was that?” Janus smirks. “I couldn’t hear you through your hands, darling.” Fae gently takes his wrists and pulls his hands down. “There’s your gorgeous face.”
“Rude,” Remy huffs.
“But you’re gay for me anyway,” Janus purrs.
“I regret telling you that.”
“No you don’t.”
“No I don’t,” Remy sighs. “You wanna be boyfriends? Or partners or something, if you don’t want to use ‘boyfriends’?”
“I would love that,” Janus smiles.
“Great, me too.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Logan knocks on Remy’s door.
“Come in!”
Logan walks in, sees Remy and Janus cuddling together, puts two and two together and gets four. Oh, they think, they’re dating.
Logan walks in, sees Remy and Janus cuddling together, and squares the twos instead of adding them. I took too long to answer, they assume. Remy must’ve gotten bored or didn’t want to wait and got with Janus instead.
“Oh,” they say. “My apologies. I’ll leave you two be.” They turn to leave.
“Wait, babes,” Remy says. Logan turns to see him stretching out a hand towards them. “What’d you need?”
“I did not need something, per se,” Logan mumbles. “However, I was going to accept Remy’s implied proposition, though it seems I misinterpreted it.”
“Hon, speak up, I can barely hear you,” Remy tells them. “And use less nerd talk; what I could hear I couldn’t understand.”
Logan sighs. “I interpreted your informing me that you are gay for me as you indirectly asking me to be in a relationship with you, but it seems that was a misstep on my part. If you don’t mind, I’ll be taking my leave now before I embarrass myself further.”
“Wait, why do you think I don’t want to be in a relationship with you?” Remy asks.
“It appears that you are dating Janus?” Logan says. “Did I misinterpret that as well?”
“No, we’re dating, but I wanna date you too,” Remy tells them. “If you don’t like Janus like that you don’t have to date faer, as long as you’re cool with sharing me.”
Logan blushes. “That would be satisfactory.”
“Janus?” Remy looks over to faer.
“I’m fine sharing,” Janus says.
“Actually,” Logan admits, blushing harder. “I feel I should confess that I harbor romantic feelings for you as well, Janus—and Virgil too, while I’m admitting these things—though if you do not wish to be in a romantic relationship with me then I am perfectly content to be metamours with you.”
“I’m certainly not opposed to dating you,” Janus tells them.
“So we’re all dating each other, then?” Remy asks.
“It certainly seems that way,” Logan answers, at the same time Janus says, “Yes.”
“Great.” Remy grins. “Come join the ‘yay I’ve got new boyfriends’ pile, Logan.” He pats the empty patch of bed beside him. Logan wrinkles their nose fondly and sits beside Remy, who pulls them down to sprawl across his stomach and onto Janus’s lap. Logan squawks, and tries to pull themself back up, but Remy pushes them back down, declaring, “No sitting up allowed.”
Logan snorts and looks over to Janus. Fae leans forward to kiss their forehead and then settles back against Remy’s side.
“Traitors, the both of you,” Logan huffs, though they can’t stop the smile spreading across their face as they say it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Remy and Janus are cuddling on Remy’s bed when someone knocks on the door.
“Come in!” Remy calls. Logan walks in, looks at the two of them.
“Oh, my apologies. I’ll leave you two be.” They turn around. Remy stops them and needles them into admitting that Remy had asked them out—the exact same way he had asked Janus out, fae notes—but that was “a misstep on their part” somehow.
“Wait, why do you think I don’t want to be in a relationship with you?” Remy asks.
“It appears you are dating Janus? Did I misinterpret that as well?”
“No, we’re dating, but I want to date you too,” Remy explains. “If you don’t like Janus like that you don’t have to date faer, as long as you’re cool with sharing me.”
And Janus knows he’s just explaining the situation and Logan’s options, but wow, way to let faer have a say in whether or not fae wants to date Logan or share Remy with them. Fae’s fine with both, but that’s not the point.
“That would be satisfactory.” Logan blushes a pretty shade of pink and unkind thoughts who? Janus doesn’t know them.
“Janus?” Remy looks over to faer, silently asking for faer opinion, and that also helps.
“I’m fine sharing,” Janus confirms.
“Actually,” Logan says, blushing harder and it looks like Janus might just have a new favorite color, wow. “I feel I should confess that I harbor romantic feelings for you as well, Janus—and Virgil too, while I’m admitting these things—though if you do not wish to be in a romantic relationship with me then I am perfectly content to be metamours with you.”
“I’m certainly not opposed to dating you.” Janus grins.
“So we’re all dating each other, then?” Remy asks.
“Yes,” Janus says, while Logan answers with, “It certainly seems that way.”
“Great.” Remy grins. Between that smile and Logan’s blush, Janus just might die from gay. “Come join the ‘yay I’ve got two new boyfriends’ pile, Logan.”
Logan wrinkles their nose—how is faer boyfriend so cute—and sits down. Remy pulls them down on both his and faer laps, and he and Logan struggle briefly.
“No sitting up allowed,” Remy declares, and Logan snickers and looks over to Janus, looking a little like they’re trying to ask for help with their eyes. Janus, being the good boyfriend fae is, kisses their forehead.
“Traitors, the both of you,” Logan accuses, smiling.
“You love us, though,” Remy says.
Logan sighs. “I suppose I do.”
“And,” Remy continues. “You said you like Virgil?”
“Yes,” Logan confirms. “Is that a problem for either of you?”
“None here, babes,” Remy says.
“Here either,” Janus adds. Fae kind of fades out the conversation after that, watching Remy and Logan talk and trying not to let faer negative thoughts get the best of faer.
Because fae can’t help but notice how Logan had confessed to Remy before faer. And Remy had asked Logan out before asking faer out.
And Janus knows they both like faer! They’re all in a relationship! Currently cuddling together!
...Still stings, though. (Fae still feels a little like second place.)
“Janus?”
Fae looks up. “Yeah?”
“What do you think of asking Virgil to join our relationship the day after tomorrow when we do our Thing?” Logan asks.
“Sounds good,” Janus says, smile only a little forced. Fae put faer thoughts firmly aside and rejoins the conversation, enjoying the warmth and comfort of faer boyfriends beside and on top of faer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Logan frowns, tapping their foot anxiously a few times.
“Should we give him another few minutes?” They ask. “It’s already been fifteen.”
“I don’t think he’s coming.” Remy says.
“He’s hidden himself away for a few days before, but he’s never missed our Thing,” Janus points out.
“Yeah.” Remy frowns. “Wonder what’s wrong.”
“Me too,” Logan says.
“You think we should go ask him?” Remy asks.
Logan hums, considering it. If Virgil hadn’t come out for their Thing, whatever was keeping him in his room was serious. “Maybe give him another day or two.”
“Alright.”
Janus grimaces, tapping faer foot rapidly. “Do… do you guys want to do it anyway, even though Virgil’s not here?”
“No,” Logan says immediately, shaking their head.
“Me neither,” Janus sighs, slowing their tapping.
“Lo, I know you said to leave him alone, but do you think we could still give him a note or something?” Remy asks, frowning. “I’m worried.”
“I am as well,” Logan admits. “And I don’t see why not.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Virgil sighs and pulls his headphones off, unplugging them from his phone. His legs are a little achy, which is probably a sign he’s been sitting for too long and needs to stretch or something.
He wanders over to the pub table he’s got in the corner, thinking that could be a good spot to set his phone while he dances to music (no one’s around to judge him, it’s fun, and it’s a good way to stretch his legs, okay?).
Out of the corner of his eye, he sees something white on the ground by the door. Crouching down to examine it, it looks like a piece of paper someone folded in half and shoved under the door. Frowning in confusion, he unfolds it.
“Hey, Virgil!” it reads. “It’s been a few days since you emerged from your room and we’re a little worried. Hope you’re alright! Missed you at the Thing today.” It’s signed by Janus, Remy and Logan, though scribbled to the side is the addition, “Apologies for Remy’s poor grammar. I hope you are well. -Logan”
Virgil’s brain latches onto “Missed you at the Thing today.” They’d done it without him? It was their Thing and they’d just excluded him? Had they only noticed he hadn’t left his room because he wasn’t at the Thing? Were they upset he wasn’t there? Like ‘where in the world were you; we had to do the Thing without you’? You aren’t a necessary part of the group, his brain whispers to him, but you bailed on them and they’re mad about it.
Virgil clamps his hands over his ears and plops to the floor. Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, he tells his mind. They don’t hate me; they gave me a letter to check in with me while respecting that I might not want to come out and not wanting to force me to.
Really? Or maybe they just couldn’t be bothered to do more than shove a note under the door.
Shut up.
Virgil focuses on doing his 4-7-8 breathing method and firmly ignores his mind telling him his friends now hate him. When his breathing is finally steady and his brain’s stopped hissing poison, he slowly relaxes his muscles and takes his hands off his ears.
Your friends are still your friends, he reminds himself. They’re concerned about your wellbeing, not mad at you, and they still like you.
Platonically, his mind adds sourly. Virgil frowns at the thought.
So far his plan to get rid of his crush on Janus had only revealed his crushes on Logan and Remy as well. Turns out when you’re avoiding thinking about one friend you like, your mind will just go to your other two friends and present some shiny new ‘liking them as more than friends’ idea to you. Which is just more incentive to hide in his room as long as he can.
Virgil sighs, standing up and placing the note facedown on the table. He’s got the majority of a week before he has to face anyone, and even if he doesn’t feel like dancing anymore, he’s still got plenty to do to occupy his time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Logan knocks firmly on Virgil’s door.
“Virgil,” they call. “It has been five days since anyone has seen you outside your room. This has not happened before and we are all concerned. Please come out to ease our worries.”
No answer. They wait a full minute, their fist still half-raised from knocking, but still nothing.
“Move, please,” Remy says, inserting himself in Logan’s place as they step out of the way. He begins knocking loudly and quickly, barely a step down from banging. “Virgil! Get your pretty ass out here!”
No sign Virgil’s heard anything.
“Maybe he’s asleep?” Logan suggests.
“At 4PM?” Janus asks. “Virgil doesn’t nap and even a night owl like him doesn’t sleep in this late.”
Logan frowns. “Virgil is not an owl—”
“It’s an expression,” Remy explains.
“Ah.”
“Virgil,” Janus tries. “We’re all really worried. Please just open the door? You don’t even have to come out, just let us know you’re alright in there.”
They all watch the doorknob hopefully for a minute. When nothing happens, Remy sighs.
“I don’t think he’s comi—”
There’s a little shrsh of paper brushing against something as a post-it slides under the door. Janus snatches it up eagerly and the other two crowd beside faer to read it.
“I’m fine. Not coming out, sorry.”
Remy sighs again.
“At least we know he’s alright?” Logan offers.
“Yeah,” he agrees, leaning against them. “I’m just worried, y’know? Just a post-it doesn’t really help.”
“I do know; I’m worried too. However, there is nothing we can do to get Virgil out of his room, short of forcing our way inside and dragging him, until he’s ready.”
“Yeah,” Remy says again.
“Wanna go cuddle until we all feel a little better?” Janus offers. Remy smiles softly.
“Yeah.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Virgil scowls at his minifridge. It’s empty, the traitor, and he’s run out of all the food in his room. He has to go out and possibly encounter other people. A tragedy.
He leaves his room at midnight, of course. Less chance of running into people, plus then when Roman makes a comment about how “it’s nice to see you’ve finally emerged from your room” Virgil can laugh at his confusion when he tells him he came out of his room a while ago, princey, where’ve you been?
Less chance of running into people doesn’t equal no chance, unfortunately, and Patton is in the kitchen baking cookies when Virgil comes out to raid it. A weird time to be baking, but Virgil will probably get warm cookies out of it, so he doesn’t question it.
“Hey, Pat,” he greets.
“Hey, kiddo! Good to see you.”
“You too,” Virgil says, shooting him a finger gun. “Anything interesting happen while I was in my room?”
Patton hums thoughtfully. “Remus switched the sugar and salt and the flour and powdered sugar this morning. I borrowed the Lilo and Stitch DVD the other day and Roman and Remus got in a fight about whether or not Roman was hiding it from Remus. Logan stayed up all night on Tuesday and collapsed around lunchtime Wednesday. Janus found another snake in the Imagination and Roman had to steal it to return it home. Oh! Logan and Janus and Remy all got together.”
Virgil freezes. “Like, got together and talked like the four of us usually do?”
“Nope! In a relationship. About the time you hid away in your room, actually.” Patton giggles a little. “It’s been really cute; Remy and Janus carried Logan upstairs after his allnighter and they’re all very sweet together.”
“Oh,” Virgil says, trying not to sound hopelessly crushed.
“Virgil?” Patton asks, turning around to look at him. “You okay?”
He forces a smile. “Just peachy.”
Patton snorts. “I doubt that, but I won’t pry if you don’t want to tell me.”
“Thanks,” Virgil says, smile more genuine now. “Anything else to report?”
“Mmm, I don’t think so,” Patton says. “But if you like, I read a really good book the other day and I could share the plot with you?”
“Sounds good,” Virgil tells him, pushing himself up on the counter as Patton launches into a rambly explanation of the storyline. They pause in the middle to pull the cookies out of the oven, and then munch on them as Patton finishes the story.
“...And then it ends on a nice, hopeful, the-future-holds-great-things ending!” Patton concludes.
“Nice,” Virgil says, shooting Patton a little smile, who returns a beaming one. “Thanks for telling me about it.”
“Thanks for listening!” Patton returns.
“Do you mind if I…” Virgil gestures towards the cookies.
“Take as many as you like,” Patton tells him. Leaning forward conspiratorially, he adds, “If you take all of them and someone washes all the dishes, then the others won’t know there were cookies to have in the first place.”
“Thanks, Patton.”
Virgil scoops up the rest of the cookies—about a dozen or so—and bids Patton goodnight before heading back into his room. He gets a little resealable baggie to slide all the cookies into and sets it on his table.
Then, with nothing else to occupy his mind, he dwells over the fact that Janus, Remy, and Logan are all in a relationship.
Patton said they’d gotten together about the time he locked himself in his room. Had they noticed he wasn’t anywhere to be found and immediately gotten together? And then only given him the note and knocked on his door out of a sense of obligation or something? And maybe because they were mad at him for missing the Thing? They wouldn’t do that.
Would they?
He doesn’t think so.
He hopes not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“What?”
“Hey, Janus, it’s okay! He’s probably just sleeping or something!”
“No, he doesn’t get to come out at midnight after he’s been in his room for a week and then not come out for breakfast or something so the rest of us can know he’s alive!” Janus fumes. Fae marches over to Virgil’s room and bangs on the door. “Open up before I kick the door down!”
Janus gives him three seconds before fae backs up, planning to kick the door down. Fae could do it. Fae’d seen an article online.
“Jay, honey, wait,” Remy says, putting a hand on faer shoulder. “I’m upset too, but I’m not going to kick his door down.”
“No, because I’m going to do it for you.”
“Can we not kick my door down?” Janus turns to see Virgil, standing half in his doorway, but still out of his room. Fae immediately drags him all the way out and into a hug.
“Only if you promise not to do that again,” fae tells him.
“Fine,” Virgil sighs. He half raises his arms, then hesitates.
“Hug me back, dummy,” Janus demands. Virgil chuckles a little and hugs faer. After a bit longer, Janus gives a final squeeze before releasing him, moving back a step and brushing faerself off. “That was because I missed you, but if you breathe a word of that to anyone I’ll prank you for a week.” Fae punches him. “And that was because you worried me, jerk.”
“Ow!” Virgil rubs his arm. “Sorry for worrying you.”
“Try not to sound too sincere now.” Fae crosses faer arms and rolls faer eyes.
“I really am sorry for worrying you,” Virgil says. “All of you,” he adds, looking over to where Remy and Logan had been silently watching their exchange.
“You’re forgiven,” Remy tells him. “If I get a hug too.”
Virgil shrugs loosely. “Sure.” He hugs Remy, then turns to Logan. They open their arms, and Virgil sinks into them. Janus steals another hug from Virgil once he pulls away from Logan.
“Sap,” Virgil teases.
“You can’t prove anything.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Things have… gone back to normal. Technically.
Virgil hasn’t hidden away for longer than a day again, and even then, it only happened once. They’ve kept doing their Thing every week or so, and to the outside observer nothing would appear different than it had been before.
But it’s… kind of like when one “cleans their room” by shoving all their stuff into a closet. The room may appear neat, but things haven’t been put in their place, just pushed to the side to be ignored.
Similarly, there seems to be a barely-there tension in their interactions with Virgil. Logan doesn’t usually notice it, but sometimes, in lulls of conversation or merely at random intervals, they’ll feel it, simmering under the surface of things. They don’t like it, both because tension, as a rule, is uncomfortable, and because they don’t know why it’s there.
They suspect it has something to do with why Virgil locked himself in his room for a week. He still hasn’t told them why he’d done it, shrugging off any questions or deflecting the conversation away from the topic.
They also think it probably has at least a little to do with the fact that Janus, Remy, and themself still have not informed Virgil of their relationship.
Virgil is smart, and very observant. He has almost certainly picked up on the fact that the three of them are dating. He is also the type of person to pretend he doesn’t know something if he feels it is being kept secret from him, and the type to internally question why information is being “withheld” from him, and assume it is something he has done.
Logan knows this, and has been pushing Janus and Remy to tell Virgil about their relationship. Janus and Remy think they should wait longer, give Virgil more time. The first couple of weeks after Virgil emerged from his room, Logan could excuse, because they’d been rediscovering their rhythm. But enough time has passed that they have all settled back into their rhythm and now they need to inform Virgil of their relationship and correct any misconceptions he most likely has over why they have taken so long to tell him.
To return to the bedroom comparison from earlier, Logan has never been one to shove things into a closet and proclaim a room clean. Everything should be put in its place and the only things to go in the closet should be things that belong there.
This weird tension and putting off informing Virgil of their relationship do not go in “the closet.”
So, a month after the week Virgil locked himself in his room, Logan opens the figurative closet door.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“We’re in a relationship,” Logan tells Virgil at one of their Things. Janus and Remy’s gazes both snap over to Logan warningly, but the cat is out of the proverbial bag and this has been a long time coming anyway. “Remy, Janus, and I.”
Virgil stares for a moment.
“Cool,” he says finally. “Congratulations.” And then, since he’s a petty jerk, “Since I locked myself in my room for a bit, right?”
The three of them exchange glances.
“Yes,” Janus tells him.
“How’d you know that, doll?” Remy asks.
“Patton told me.” Virgil half-shrugs. Before he can stop himself, he adds, “Saw your chance and took it, huh?”
Logan blinks. “What do you mean by that?”
“It’s nothing,” Virgil says. If he tells them, they’re going to “correct” him, even if he’s right and they just feel bad about it.
“Um, no, that’s clearly not nothing, hon,” Remy sort of laughs, though his expression is serious. Virgil shrugs again, this time with both shoulders.
“Virgil,” Janus commands. “Tell us.”
Virgil rolls his eyes and tips his head back so he doesn't have to look at them. “I’m just saying, we’re all sort of a group, and you didn’t want to feel awkward with the three of you getting together and me not, so once you noticed I was out of the way, you took the opportunity and asked each other out.”
“No,” Remy corrects, because that is so far from what actually happened it might as well be on the other side of the planet. “That is definitely not what happened, V, dear.”
“Sure,” Virgil agrees, in a way that says he clearly doesn’t believe him but doesn’t want to fight over it.
“You think we, what—saw you locked yourself in your room and decided that was a good chance to exclude you?” Logan asks incredulously.
Virgil snaps and points at them. “That would be what happened.”
“That’s not what happened,” Logan insists.
“Look,” Virgil says, tilting his head up to look at the three of them. “You don’t have to lie to me to be nice or spare my feelings or whatever. I get it.”
“I don’t think you do,” Janus tells him.
“Then explain it to me.”
“I realized how gay I was,” Remy explains. “Ran into Jan and Lo, asked them out, and we all got together. We decided to ask you at the next one of these Things we had, since that was the next time we were guaranteed to all be together alone. When you didn’t show up, we got worried but wanted to give you space, so we mostly left you be until Patton told us you’d come out and then we pulled you out of your room because we figured you were ready enough to come out.”
“And then, what, you just chose not to tell me you guys were dating for a month?” Virgil asks.
“We were trying to find a good time,” Logan tells him.
“It’s been a month; there’s been plenty of time,” Virgil snaps.
Then he stops, tilts his head to the side.
“Wait…” he says slowly. “Did— Did you say ‘ask me’? Like, ask me out?”
“Yeah, duh,” Remy replies.
“You guys like me?”
“I doubt we would hang out with you every week if we disliked you, Virgil.” Janus rolls faer eyes.
“You guys like me romantically?” Virgil amends.
“Yes.”
“Yeah.”
“Duh.”
Virgil curls himself up, burying his head in his knees as he processes this. Remy gently lays a hand on his knee.
“It’s okay if you don’t like us back, or only like one or two of us, hon,” Remy tells him. “But we’d like you to join our relationship, if you’ll have us.”
The knee starts trembling under his hand, and Remy realizes Virgil’s crying. “Oh, hon…” He gathers him up in a hug.
“I—I thought you were avoiding telling me because you didn’t want me to know,” Virgil stammers through his tears. “I thought you’d noticed I left and saw that as your chance to get together without me being around. I thought— I thought—” He starts crying too hard to talk.
Remy holds him, and Janus and Logan move over to them and help whisper assurances that no, they would never, that they love him so much and they’re so sorry it came to this. Their hands on his knee and back and Remy’s arms around him are bright spots of warmth that Virgil relishes.
He cries until he thinks he can’t, until one of them murmurs, “We’re here; we love you,” and sends him to fresh tears. He cries for an hour, at least, and when he’s truly sobbed out all the hurt over this inside him, the other three are still there with him.
“Sorry,” Virgil whispers, not fully trusting his voice.
Logan frowns. “What for?”
He gestures a little to the huddle they’re in. “Messing up this. Crying on you guys for like an hour.”
“You haven’t messed up anything,” Remy assures him. “And we’re happy to let you cry on us all you want.”
“Better than shoving your emotions down and ignoring them as they fester,” Janus adds.
“Yeah, I guess.” Virgil nods and scrubs at his face. “Thanks.”
“You’re very welcome,” Logan says.
“This might be a bad time,” Remy says, “and feel free to tell me off if it is, but does this mean you want to be our boyfriend?”
Virgil laughs, a little wetly. “Yeah. I’d really like that.”
“Good,” Remy says. “We would, too.”
“Celebratory ‘we gained a boyfriend’ cuddles,” Janus declares, pulling them over to the bed. No one resists, and they cuddle until they fall asleep on each other.
Logan is a polyamorous nonbinary disaster who gets extremely flustered if you look at them while they're doing their daily info dump
Patton is stupidly clumsy, but extremely fit for some reason (he uses Janus and Virgil as weights) and he's a lanky boi(and a frog)
Roman is a genderfluid person with autism and ADHD, so their hands often flap and they will bite down on their chewy necklace while watching movies or stim randomly
Virgil has a guilty pleasure of cheesy pop songs and dancing and he has a few tattoos that he had Remy do. Hates Dr Picani's guts.
Remus likes to cook, but also experiment with tastes(which is how he likes deodorant as a snack, because he can't fucking taste it any more) and does not stim as much or have autism, but he does have heavy ADHD and dyslexia.
Janus will tackle you if you praise him and will not let go until he snaps out of his giddy stupor. He seeks cuddles often because he's cold blooded and Logan happens to be the warmest side for some reason.
