Rescues talk loudly, negatively, and often about people who surrender their pets. We also have a lot to say about pets that are being improperly cared for or outright neglected. I want to talk about something else: people who acknowledge and accept that they can not properly care for their pet, even if they love them very much, and surrender them to give them a better life. I want to speak to this because we've created a culture of shame around rehoming or surrendering animals that makes people reluctant to give up pets they can't handle, and in doing so cause the animals to remain in substandard care conditions.
This quaker parrot is named Bogey. His owner reached out to me last month needing placement. Bogey is on home #3; they came into owning him through a relative who could no longer meet his needs. Unfortunately, his new people couldn't either. They didn't have the space, the money, or the time, and the bird was very aggressive towards the husband of the couple. Bogey's cage was placed in the indoor portion of a chicken coop, where his care suffered on all fronts. As you can see in the picture up top, his cage was dirty, too small, and while photo doesn't show this, it was also poorly enriched & his diet was inappropriate.
Bogey's owner was desperate and embarrassed when she came to me. She knew things were bad but was struggling to do better; she is disabled, living in poverty, and was failing at basic upkeep. But instead of letting the bird languish, she reached out for help, even though it was difficult for her. She told me about his favorite foods, music, the phrases he could say, and sent him with a few of his toys; she cared ABOUT him, but couldn't care FOR him.
It's easy to look at a sad little bird in a filthy cage and be outraged. It was a very upsetting situation; my heart absolutely sank when I saw him, and I immediately and frantically started looking for placement. However, if I had responded to his owner by berating her for his poor care, guilt tripping her for trying to "dump" her pet, told her she should step up and do whatever it takes when she lacked the resources, you wouldn't see the second picture. That's Bogey with his new owner, already bonding with her. He now has plenty of space, a clean enriched habitat, and is transitioning to a healthier diet. He is in a better placement because his former owner admitted there was a problem and sought help.
Animal rescue is about animals, but it's about people, too. It is easy to become bitter and cynical when you see people causing so much preventable suffering. However, much of what we are quick to dismiss as someone not caring is actually someone STRUGGLING. Sometimes they just need more knowledge, more support, more access to resources to do right. And sometimes doing right means giving up the animal.
I have been involved in rescue since I was a teen. I have operated my own rescue for over 15 years. In the US, worsening economic and housing conditions are driving surrender rates up and adoptions down. Everyone in our community is worn paper thin. I keenly understand how hard rescue is, how overwhelming, how frustrating - but even still, as a community, I think having a gentler understanding of how and why people fail as pet owners would go a long way.
