#selfish shellfish au

[shanklin]

Its stabbing time! 🔪 🔪 🔪 The Ides of March are cometh

[eviliens]

Out of the frying pan and into… - Choice 15.

Links: Selfish Shellfish AU by @shanklin

Shrimpy Stan Masterpost

This chapter at AO3

Results of choice 14: ...[The choice Stan liked the most] would be to go with Melody and Soos. (66,7% out of 21 votes + 1 AO3 comment).

Stan glanced at the couple that was standing near the exit. And then at his brothers who were tightly holding onto his hands.

He'd so wanted to go with Ford, pretend like everything was as if they were still joined at the hip. Telling jokes and laughing all the way to Oregon. Just like at the beginning of that summer.

Or with Shermie, so Stan could enjoy the excited chirping of his younger brother and try to re-establish his image of the cool brother instead of the one who landed in the hospital.

But…

Stan raised his eyes and looked towards grownups.

Grauntie and Great Uncle immediately smiled at him.

Sure, a road trip together could bring a possibility to corner them. Or wait for them to slip up and divulge what they actually knew and were now hiding from Stan. 

But…

Mom was smiling as well, and Fidds at her side nodded at Stan.

Right, there could be no way that nerd would refuse to go and take a detour to show where he last saw Shanklin. Even if logic wouldn't help Stan, he was sure he could be annoying enough to be successful in his negotiations.

But…

Stan glanced once again at the couple near the door. At the nice lady that still smiled at him despite everything that happened and her fiancé that…

“Stan?” He heard his twin’s worried voice and had to take a deep breath to ground himself.

Of course he wanted answers, he wanted so much to do something to crawl out from a rising sense of helplessness, but all that was drowning in the face of a sudden shining window of opportunity. Of the fresh gust of wind. 

Of a way out.

“I'll go with Melody and Soos”, Stan steeled himself as he said that and looked back to Ford, then to Shermie. “Sorry, but-”

“That wasn't the option”, Great Uncle interrupted him, as his smile slowly started giving way to a frown. “This is not some fun trip, this is a matter of getting you to safety. And while I am ready to entrust you to Fiddleford because the lad is fully capable…”

Stan felt something sizzling inside, both fearful and enraged. That was so like Great Uncle Mason, not to explain what he expected to hear and then to scold when Stan would give an answer, apparently a wrong one, because how he was expected to know…

“Grunkle Dipper, please shut up”.

Stan whipped his head towards his twin who was currently glaring at their elder relative.

And said relative was now gaping.

“Ford, my boy, I beg your pardon…?” Great Uncle eventually coughed. “Surely you realise as well-”

“You just said Stan should be the one to decide!” Ford briefly glanced at Stan and tugged on the hand that still was being gripped. “Stan just did that, so don't be…”

“Stan is confused and doesn't realise what's at stake here-?” Great Uncle tried to raise his voice, but Ford did that as well.

“Then why did you agree in the first place?! If you weren't intending to honour his choice if it wouldn't be to your liking?” He shouted, making Stan's ears ring from the volume of it. And also making Stan's heart clench from realisation. Did Ford just…? What?

Yet more surprising was the Great Uncle’s reaction, who actually took a step back, and his frown lessened, taking an actual guilty expression.

“I'm sorry, you're absolutely right”, he exhaled several times. “Stan, my boy, I'm sorry, but I need you to rethink your choice. The priority is having someone to keep yourself safe in case of potential ambush-”

And have more of that in a crumpled space with no way out? For hours?!

“No”, Stan heard himself saying it and clutched harder to his twin's hand. “I'm not changing my mind. I can protect myself!” Sure, he wasn't at his best currently, but he could still shoot or throw some knives. And that was only a potential threat, so as long as he stayed low…

…Or just…

Sneak away. Find another place, recover, make a plan for what to do next-

“Then it's decided”, Ford loudly sighed, glancing once again at Stan, before glaring at Great Uncle. “Stan is going to take Mr Ramirez's car. And I'm going with them, to keep my twin safe”.

“What?!” Stan shouted and heard Great Uncle Mason join him with a similar one. 

“Ford, my boy-” Great Uncle tried to obviously object, judging from the nervous wavering of his hands, but Ford didn't let him.

“If your only issue is having someone to assure Stan’s safety, then I'm joining them. That should take care of the issue, right?”

“But-”

“Or do you not trust me, Grunkle Dipper?”

The sound of Great Uncle’s jaws snapped shut was actually audible. As well as following grinding.

“Of course I trust you,” he eventually said. “It's just I don't…” he paused, before taking more deep breaths. “No, I trust both of you. I just worry…”

“They can take care of themselves, Dipper”, that was Grauntie Mabel who placed her hand on Great Uncle's shoulder. “They grew up into fine young men after all, don't you think?”

And Great Uncle's frame relaxed.

“I still don't like it”, he grumbled, and then he was back to looking at Stan. “But that is indeed your choice and I know you both can deal with danger, quite creatively, but just please… try to avoid it at any cost! Soos”, he turned to the other man, “If something happens to Stan while he's under your care, it won't matter that we are friends …”

“I have a bat”, Soos seriously nodded. “And little dudes will be the safest with us!” 

“Yes, Soos once told me how he single-handedly fought away the pack of wolves to save two of his best friends…” Melody chuckled, and while Graunty Mabel grinned in response, Great Uncle choked.

“They weren't just any wolves, they were werewolves, and it wasn't single-handedly, we just were a bit tied up at the moment to help him…”

“I'll go with you as well”, suddenly the probably fun (or most likely boring due to soon-to-be coming scientific explanation of all the differences between ordinary wolves and were-ones) story faded away, as Shermie tugged Stan's hand to get his attention. “If Ford can go with you, I want to as well! Last time I left you out of my sight-”

“Shermie, no!” Ford shook his head for extra measure. “Go with Mom and Fiddleford as planned. I'll watch over Stan, and we'll be with you as soon as we can-”

***

“How? How does he do this?” 

Stan heard his twin groan and chuckled. They both were watching Soos putting together some luggage in the trunk of their car. And Shermie was helping him by passing him the lighter bags, one of which was his own backpack, put together by their Mom.

“He should patent his puppy eyes, very effective and leaves no chance to resist”, Stan elbowed his twin with his less throbbing side.

“I guess”, Ford laughed and elbowed Stan back, quite lightly, and suddenly his voice grew serious. “Hope you don't mind us both tagging along, without actually asking you first.”

Stan didn't have to ponder even for a second.

“Never!” He grinned, still feeling sort of lightheaded that Ford actually stood up to Great Uncle for his sake. And that Shermie just ignored every logical reasoning, saying instead that he had run away once, he'd just do it again. And the argument was settled. But still… “Thank you”.

“What for?” Ford raised his eyebrow. “For tagging along? Don't thank me, I probably would just do it any-”

“For standing up for me”.

Ford blinked, before he looked away.

“Then even more reasons not to thank me”, he whispered. “That's what I always should've been doing, all that time back then, yet I…” Ford gulped and returned his gaze towards Stan, and now it was trembling. “We're twins, right? So we should be each other’s support first and foremost, right?”

“No, it's not and it's alright”, Stan smiled at him. “We are each different people, so it's selfish to expect- Ouch!” he grabbed the back of his head, which started to sting after a slap from Ford, more stinging from the suddenness of it, than from actual impact. “What the hell, Ford?!”

“It's not about expecting!” Ford’s index finger was now almost right between Stan's eyes. “It's about taking care! It's about trust! It's about you knowing…” he suddenly groaned, as his finger dropped down together with his whole hand. “Oh right”, he whispered, and then both of Stan's cheeks were grabbed by six-fingered palms, making him stare right into his twin's face. 

“Personal space, nerd”, Stan tried to laugh his unease away, as apparently Ford was determined to do a lecture over whatever Stan was supposed to know.

…And Stan kind of missed that.

Yet Ford wasn't already rambling away all his thoughts and ideas. Instead he was frowning, opening and closing his mouth several times, becoming more and more nervous with each and every attempt to find words. So Stan took pity on him.

“Relax”, he smiled, patting with his hand over Ford's elbow. “Whatever your genius brain wants to share with a class - take your time. I'll listen to it when you're ready. If you'd still want to share then, I mean…”

That sort of made Ford less nervous, but instead of becoming relaxed, as Stan expected, the nerd's gaze hardened.

“I’m sorry”, he finally said, and that too was not something Stan expected from his twin. “I just don't know how to…”

“You? Don't know something? Are you sure you're really Ford?” Stan chuckled.

“Don't try to distract me!” And yet the edge of Ford's mouth slightly twitched upwards. “I'm trying to… Oh to hell with that! I care about you and will continue to do so until you fully believe me! And even after that!”

“Of course I believe you”, Stan laughed nervously. “And likewise-”

“You don't”, Ford interrupted him. “You don't believe, and stop saying otherwise, because-”

“I'm not lying!” Stan shook Ford's hands from him and took a step back. “I know you care! And that's the problem-”

Because Ford might be caring now, ready to even stand against their Great Uncle, but just for how long…?

“I never said you're lying,” Ford offered his hands in a surrounding gesture. “I'm just saying…”

Stan didn't want to hear it. He knew the truth, but he also knew that he'd believe Ford and whatever sentimental nonsense he'd say. 

“Fidds!” he shouted instead, seeing as the said young man appeared from around the corner some distance away from them. “Just the nerd I wanted to talk to!” Stan waved his hand to catch Fidds' attention and smiled at Ford apologetically. “Sorry, that's very urgent and can't be delayed!”

Ford's face told just exactly how much he believed in the urgency, yet after a brief pause he just sighed and nodded.

“We're not done talking”, he grumbled instead. And Stan knew it, but he simply hoped that next time he'd find another distraction to escape the lecture just as quickly.  

***

“You want something”, Fidds squinted at Stan as the latter dragged him away from prying eyes.

“Maybe I just want to reminisce some”, Stan huffed, never intending to admit the real reason they were here. “You know, ask about your robots or about that raccoon girlfriend of yours…”

But instead of shouting from indignation and starting a loud stuttering speech full of objections, as Stan expected him to do, Fidds just sighed and stared even harder.

“Did you two argue once again?” He raised an eyebrow. It didn't sound like a question however, and Stan didn't like it at all. “You should know he means well…”

Stan’s fist slammed the wall, just to the side of nerd's shoulder, making Fidds squeak.

“What in damnation?!” The nerd's gaze changed, now looking more nervous. “Stanley, I didn't mean…”

“Save it”, Stan exhaled. Just as well, he remembered that there was something he could be wanting from Fidds, and not just his opinion about their family issues. And now, when there was no-one to interfere, was a perfect moment to get it. “What do you know about Shanklin?”

That made Fidds gulp and look away.

“Listen”, he started. “It's… complicated. He's safe, Grauntie Pines healed him to the best of her ability, but as he ran away…”

Stan punched the wall again, making the nerd flinch.

“I'm sick of hearing this nonsense. It's obvious you know more! And so I want answers!”

“I can't give them to you!” Fidds glared back, trembling with his body, but his gaze steady. “You better stop asking about him, please!”

Stan felt a cold sweeping through his insides.

“You just told me he's safe. You all keep telling me that! Since I woke up!” He growled, grabbing the nerd by the collar of his shirt. “Was that a lie?!”

“No!” Fidds pushed Stan away by his shoulders, and the suddenness of it was enough for the shirt to be released. “Your pet is safe indeed. As much as a possum on his own can be. He seemed like a capable one…”

“Where is he?!” Stan tried to grab the nerd's shirt once again, but Fidds twisted away. “Look, I get that you didn't want to go looking for him, or didn't have time, so tell me where you saw him last, and I'll go find him mys…”

“You can't!” Fidds grabbed Stan's wrist. “Stan, listen, you can’t!”

“And why's that?!” Stan pulled back his arm, trying to drop the hold, but Fidds wasn't releasing him.

“Why?!” Fidds shrieked. “Why?! Well, it's dangerous and you're hurt! How about that?! We just got you back, not for you to risk it all for that little beast…”

Stan punched Fidds.

“Shanklin is my friend”, he hissed, shaking his fist and watching as the nerd went clutching his nose. “He was there for me when no one was. He saved me countless times, and you want me to just abandon him?! Are you nuts?!”

Fidds’ eyes widened, and as he carefully poked his nose before lowering his hands, the nerd sighed.

“I… You're right. Wouldn't be you otherwise. And that's what we've feared”, he chuckled and then stared at Stan with all seriousness in his eyes. “But I can't let you go after him. I'm sorry, Stanley. That's simply for your own good…”

This time Stan's fist was caught before the so much desired impact.

“It’s for me to decide! I can handle myself!” Stan growled. “Just tell me…”

“No!”

Stan felt his nails almost piercing the skin of his palms. For a second the loud pounding in his ears whispered how easily he could make the nerd change his mind… If he stopped going easy with the punches and instead aimed for real damage.

But immediately after Stan stumbled back. Did he just really consider…? At Fidds? The kind kid that cracked no less than seven pairs of glasses in attempts to catch up to them? The same kid that humoured Stan's dumb questions till the very end of summer?

The same grown up kid that now was looking at Stan with pity and concern?

And yet… Stan needed the answers. No, not the answers - he needed his friend. And the small flashes of memories gave him another option as to how to proceed. If Fidds (and apparently the rest of his family) was so trembling over his health…

“I'm sorry”, Stan took another step away, lowering his gaze and forcing himself to look small and apologetic. “I lost my temper here.”

“No! Don't worry about that!” Unexpectedly, Fidds was shouting, reaching for Stan's hand again. “Look, it didn't really hurt, and nothing is broken, and I appreciate the apology, so everything is good!”

Nothing was good, but Stan appreciated the sentiment. Especially if it meant Fidds wasn't really angry at him. 

“It's just… He's my friend”, Stan exhaled, before going straight for his plan. “So if I can't look for him, can you do it? Please?”

Stan couldn't say that he ever was a master of begging. Jorge had made it known almost immediately that Stan should lose that irritating habit once and for all. Yet it was useful as even Father at times had become softer if Stan had been successful in his attempts. So the skill never vanished.

And now the skill was working, as Fidds obviously was struggling not to reconsider. 

“Look, Stanley, I realise you truly miss your friend, but…”

“Please, Fiddleford. Just this once, please. I don't want him to be alone on his own. Find him. Or at least… try to search”.

And it worked. Stan heard it in the sound of gulping and a deep exhale that followed.

“I… Okay, okay, but…” Fidds still sounded unsure. “Several days passed. I can visit the place where I saw Shanklin last, but if he isn't there…”

“...Then I'll ditch everyone and come searching by myself”, Stan smirked, showing his teeth. “So try better. Please”, he added in the end, smoothing his grin into a smile. 

It didn't stop Fidds from looking alarmed, but then again, he didn't take his promise back.

Unlike someone they both knew.

***

Stan was walking. It was quite a long time, probably, since he started his walk, yet his feet didn't ache and he couldn't remember where he had come from. 

The trees were stretching upwards. Mighty oaks and proud pines were making Stan feel small before them, having only a narrow path forward and no sky to glance upwards.

Between one moment and the next one Stan realised he wasn't alone anymore.

“Shanklin!” He shouted and ran after his friend, who hissed and wasn't slowing down, leading Stan away from the path and into the darkness of woods. And just like that Shanklin was gone, not even his hissing or sounds of his paws audible anymore. “Shanklin! Come back!” Stan shouted louder, keeping running into the same direction.

“Where do you think you are going?”

Stan flinched, hearing the voice of the man that gave him shelter for the past few years.

“Jorge?” He turned around, searching for the source of the voice. And Jorge really was there, leaning over the rough surface of the tree bark, watching Stan as the latter approached. “What happened? It is over? Can I go home now?”

Jorge laughed. “Home? You think you have one?”

Stan stopped in his approach. “I don't understand”, he whispered. “Jorge, please…”

Jorge kept laughing, and there wasn't any darkness anymore. Jorge was chasing it away, with the blood that was now dripping down his body.

“No!” Stan rushed to stop the crimson liquid from spilling, but no matter how fast he ran, he couldn't approach, and Jorge kept bleeding. “No! You aren't dead! I know it!”

“So you're a naive fool. Or simply don’t want to think of me selling you out”, Jorge smirked at him. “But let's trust that I still had some use for you. What do you think happened, if my cartel is no more? You should know that the captain never abandons his drowning ship. We went down. All because you weren't enough. You had such a simple job to do, and you failed…”

“You're not dead!” Stan screamed, falling to his knees and covering his ears. “Stop saying that! I did all I could, and you can't die so easily! You always have plans! Surely it's just one of them!”

“Then me dying is just a plan, Stanley?”

Stan felt a burning. His heart burnt, leaving nothing but ashes, and as he turned around, Jimmy was there, leaning against another tree, looking boring and cool and detached, like the very first time Stan had seen him.

“What, will you tell me I'm not dead as well?” 

To that Stan couldn't say anything. He knew the truth, he felt it, he still carried the ashes of the Oath that was no more and left the emptiness in its stead.

“Should've told you to fuck off once again”, Jimmy kept staring. “I don't know what you even hoped for. Didn't I already tell you we were done?”

“Then why?!” Stan felt tears gathering in his eyes. “Why?!”

“Why what?” In a blink of an eye Jimmy was near him now, letting Stan grab him by the lapels of the ever-present leather jacket.

And Stan had no answer. Why had Jimmy agreed to follow his plan? Why had Jimmy given up everything just to save Stan? Why couldn't Jimmy get what Stan was really asking?

“Because I'm dead and dead ones can't really answer.” A warm palm was now stroking Stan's cheek, with Jimmy's thumb swiftly preventing some of the tears from spilling further. “And you know that as well, Stanley”.

Stanley left out a wail of anguish, before latching even tighter, grabbing Jimmy by his cheeks and pulling him closer, before crossing the last distance and kissing him.

It felt like all the times before and at the same time - nothing like them. Jimmy's lips were both scolding hot and deadly chilling, and yet Stan couldn't get enough, because he had nothing left, only this moment, and maybe - maybe it would mean something…

The skin under Stan's fingers and his lips started to melt. And not only skin, but every tissue was dissolving, until only the smooth cold surface was left.

Stan gasped and stared at what was before him - a skull, staring without blinking with dimmed fire inside of his empty eyesockets.

“Do you like me?” The skull clanked his teeth. “Did you ever truly like me? Did I ever like you the same way?”

“We should've liked each other, right? Or what were we even doing otherwise?” Stan whispered, trying to kiss Jimmy once again. And he succeeded in a way, licking the other's teeth and pressing his own lips to the bone surface that tasted weirdly of spices and oil and regret.

“Stanley”, Jimmy whispered to him, “Stanley, Stanley-”

“-Stanley!”

Stan gasped and stared at his twin’s worried face. Immediately he winced as his eyes noticed the bright amount of the sunlight outside of the car. It wasn't hitting him directly, but still it was a pain to look at.

And… Right. He was in a car, in Soos and Melody's car. With the first one behind the wheel (though the car wasn't actually moving right now and the driver was worriedly looking at them) and the latter wordlessly passing a bottle of water to Stan from the passenger seat.

Stan nodded and just as wordlessly accepted the bottle, opening it and gulping no less than half of it in one go. It did make him choke to no one's surprise. Immediately he was patted on his back, with two hands in a slightly uneven rhythm.

Right, Stan was not only in the backseat of Soos and Melody's car, but he was also flanked by both of his brothers from every side.

“Sorry for waking you up”, Ford whispered, “but it looked like you had a nightmare…”

“It was”, Stan groaned, closing the bottle and letting himself drop back to a quite comfortable seat, while also closing his eyes. “It was just a dream.”

Despite no one talking, Stan felt everyone staring, as well as the little chain pulsing on his wrist.

On one hand he was grateful to Ford for waking him up, on the other…

“You called for Jimmy”, Shermie took Stan by the hand closest to him. “You sounded disturbed”.

Stan just hummed but didn't comment on it. It was unnecessary, everyone already knew that Stan was the cause…

“Who's Jimmy?” Soos asked and coughed. “You don't need to answer, I'm just curious.”

Stan heard Shermie's loud intake of breath, but just as he cracked one eye open and before their little brother could utter even a word, Ford reached across Stan and clamped Shermie's mouth shut with his own hand. The boy shouted something muffled in indignation, but one look at Ford who shook his head was apparently enough for Shermie to calm down.

Melody was the one to prevent the pause from growing.

“You mean cool blond and mysterious? I remember you telling me about him.” Stan saw Melody's soft stare aimed at him. Noticing that, she smiled. “Could it be that you aren't as over him as you thought you were?”

Stan looked away, deep in thoughts, ignoring for a moment all the stares aimed at him.

Would he like for Melody to know it? Would he like for all of them present to know just who Jimmy was to Stan? 

Or would it be better to let the matter rest? Telling their story wouldn't help anyone, as it was just it - a story that had no place in the present anymore?

The little chain tightened for a second, and Stan felt its wordless question aimed at him.

After closing his eyes once again and thinking some more, Stan made up his mind.

"Jimmy was someone I immediately fell in love with."

"Jimmy was my friend. Despite everything, I trusted him."

"Jimmy was the one who sacrificed everything for me."

"Jimmy was a Ghost Rider, a really powerful being."

"Jimmy was someone I worked with at times."

"I don't want to talk about him."

"Is anyone else hungry? I think I'm starving!"

[I'm not participating, I'm here for results]

Voting ended onApr 23

[lackinggravitas]

little drabble of @shanklin's shellfish au + stan takes (younger sibling) shermie. because if there's one thing i like it's seeing stan in a messed up situation and going "okay, but what if he had a kid he also had to take care of, making everything worse for everyone?" and their shellfish au. god their shellfish au-

warning for swearing and stan's dismally low self-esteem, i guess? this is really angsty, fluff lovers beware-

Stan’s gonna strangle Elmo. 

That’s a hyperbole. He wouldn’t actually strangle an innocent puppet. 

Doesn’t mean that he doesn’t really want to right now. 

“You first!” Shermie demands, frowning seriously at Stan.

“Kid-”

“You first!” Shermie insists and damn it, he sounds like he’s one push away from a full-blown tantrum. Stan sighs. 

Sesame Streets’ filled his little brother’s head up with all these warm, sunshine-y ideas about sharing and empathy. The last things either of them need. Everything was fine before, back when Stan could get away with just taking Shermie’s leftovers or stamping back the hunger pains clawing and squeezing his stomach when mealtimes rolled around. The kid wouldn’t complain then.

Now Shermie thinks they have to share. And apparently, to Shermie, sharing looks like passing their latest stolen meal back and forth like they're taking hits of a cigarette. 

And damn it, but toddlers were fucking stubborn when they wanted to be, and Stan doesn’t think he can handle a screaming toddler, okay? Not tonight. 

“Okay, okay.” He takes the smallest, most unintrusive little bite someone could possibly make, taking the tiniest nibble off the slice of stolen sourdough. Even that has his stomach seizing greedily because fuck, when was the last time he ate? Pulling the bread back from his mouth takes a herculean effort. “Satisfied?”

But Shermie looks far from placated. “That was too tiny!” he shrills in his angry baby voice. “Take a better one!”

“You need more than I do, kid-” 

“Bigger bite! Bigger bite!” Shermie yells, flailing angry fists in the air. Fuckin’ hell, what’s Stan raising here, the next Mother Teresa? This kid should be way more selfish than this. Stan’s raising him, for fuck’s sake. 

Stan takes a bigger bite. He practically has to choke this one down - it drags against his throat, clogging with the thoughts rising in his head. Selfish, selfish, that should have gone to Shermie, you’re so selfish-

“There,” he croaks, once he’s finally able to force it far enough down. He holds out the rest of the bread to Shermie. “Now your turn.” 

At least no one could ever accuse the kid of being some sort of saintly, selfless altruist - he takes the bread in his hands and takes a big, generous bite, just about as much as he can fit in his mouth. Just like Stan taught him. 

“Don’t choke,” Stan says, like saying that is gonna do anything, reaching out to put a steadying hand on Shermie's back. He tries not to think about how small Shermie is under the palm of his hand as he rubs the little guy’s back, mumbling to him, “There ya go, chew slowly now, just like that.”

Finally Shermie swallows it all down, without too much of a hitch. Stan pulls his hand back.

Stan almost hopes for a second that Shermie would be reminded of his own hunger enough to forget Stan’s, to just take the bread and eat it all, but he doesn’t. He passes the loaf back to Stan, and he waits.

Stan sighs. He tears off another bite. The voracious animal in his stomach makes it feel like nothing. Never satisfied, always asking for more. Selfish.

Shermie’s starting to smile at him now, at least, swinging his little legs a bit. “Does it taste good?”

Stan raises an eyebrow at him. He hands the bread to Shermie. “You had some yourself, why don’t you tell me?”

Shermie frowns at him, tiny nose scrunching. “Yeah, but I wanna know what you think!”

What is this, more Sesame Street crap? Shermie should know Stan’s opinion doesn’t matter. Stan doesn’t get to have an opinion. “I dunno, kid. If I say no, will you eat all of it?”

“Noo!” Shermie wails. Damn. “We havta share!”

Stan’s too tired to fight about this. He’s always tired - it’s a bone deep dredge, this exhaustion. It haunts him at every moment, has for years. It’s starting to become more a part of him than anything else, making a home next to the rotten greed of his core. 

“Alright, alright.” Stan sighs. “It’s good, okay? It’s very, uh, very… flavorful?”

Shermie nods, like this makes complete sense. He takes another bite of the bread, chewing thoughtfully. 

Stan glances out the window. Getting dark out there. Hm.

“You want a story tonight, Shermie?” he asks, as the kid passes the bread to him. 

Shermie blinks at him. “But it’s not bedtime yet?”

“We’re going to bed early tonight,” Stan tells him, because he’s a selfish bastard who doesn’t care if his kid brother wants to stay up later, because he’s Stan Pines, greedy, selfish, Stan Pines- “Stan’s tired.” 

But Shermie doesn’t even look that upset. “Okay,” he says easily. Because he’s used to Stan being selfish, of course, because he has to live with him, forced when he’d be happier anywhere else, because his brother’s a selfish fuckup who killed their- “We’re gonna keep eating though, right?” 

Stan tries to keep his breathing even. “Yeah. We’ll keep eating.” And he takes his bite out of the sourdough, just to reassure the kid, before passing it back.

Shermie takes a big bite out of the bread. “I love you, Stan,” he says with his mouth full. 

No you don’t. You shouldn’t love me. I’m the worst person alive. All true, but also things he can’t in good conscious drop on his kid brother, because Stan’s not that awful. Shermie doesn’t need to be burdened with Stan’s fucking shit. “I love you too, buddy,” he says instead, and at least he’s not lying. 

[imaginationphoenix]

Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow, OW!

Fuck you @shanklin -

Just casually suggest an AU that induces us all with Angst, then Stab me in the Heart by writing an utterly incredible, wonderful, hurtful and absolutely Beautiful piece of work (see below for context).

Shanklin: Makes a Heart-Wrenching AU. Then shares a post of a beautiful thought from Anonymous saying "If Stan were to be a fish, he’d imagine himself a piranha ..." and happens to briefly mention Weirdmaggedon.

ImaginationPhoenix: Adds comments on the post about my desires for Gravity Falls AUs

"My thing with any Gravity Falls AU is I want every story to end (or at least the climax to be) Stan punching Bill in the eye, getting rid of Bill, making an ultimate sacrifice, and learning he is worth something. And this AU he almost needs to learn that more than in canon. Keep Mabel going into a Happy Bubble - one where they didn't fail Stan. Or it could be Ford in there, with Stan, and Dipper if he isn't literal gold rescuing the person (still loving his family as he always does)."

Shanklin: Takes my small idea and makes it better (and darker and more hurtful) "Wait wait wait ...

So Mabel is in the Bubble and everything is great because they didnt fail Stan and Stan is fine. And then Ford and Dipper join her in the bubble and they get stuck as well because they didn't fail and Stan is HAPPY

And then Stan joins the bubble and sees how everyone prefers that fake unbroken Stan over the mess that he is.

…of course giving up his memories will be for the best. Maybe an untainted version of himself will be able to be loved by them and make them happy just like the fake Stan in the bubble did :')"

AND THEN - follows that up with this!

Oh oh 🥺 so they're all in the dream bubble and Stan comes to rescue them, but leaves because they're happy and safe in there. He can't just insert himself into their lives again and mess it all up.

He leaves to fight Bill alone.

His family catches glimpse of him though, or maybe something reminds them of the real Stan and they snap out of it.

They finally realise that there is no quick fix to make Stan alright again and that it's all their fault and how wrong they were about him.

Oh god stan is going to sacrifice himself for their sakes. He's way too selfless. They need to stop him.

So they break out of the bubble by themselves and run after Stan.

They reuinte and try to apologize and make Stan realise how much they love him. How important he is. How much they need him.

But time is running out and they need to defeat Bill or the world is doomed. It doesn't matter anymore if they're telling the truth [stan doubts it] or if they're just lying to him to make him feel better before his death/sacrifice, the only way out is for Stan to give himself up.

And then. They refuse. They won't let him. Fuck the world. Let it burn if it means their Stan will be gone. He is much more important than the fate of the universe.

And then. Maybe then it gets through to him that he too hasn't been the best at reading his family.

And with that they can finally start on rebuilding their bond.

…I'm sure they'll manage to defeat bill by the power of love or something. That's not important. Only Stan is."

*/*/*

Well All I can say to Shanklin is Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow, OW!

There is one highly appropriate thing to post here ....

....

You know what - who needs a heart to care anyway?

I'm going back to Shanklin's light-hearted Sentient Mystery Shack theory being petty towards Ford.

Let's see - Whilst Gruncle Stan and the kids were away mesing with Stan's Tourist Trap Rivals; Ford spent his whole time fighting with the Shack as to the location of an unimportant jar. But when Stan came back and put it in the same place as Ford, it stayed there happily.

So there.

[marutianistic]

Lumberjack option so far:

The AU, tis beautiful in its angst. Consider the alternate path of...the lumberjack.

3 years after that summer, Stan's working at the docks full time (filbrick pulled him out of school and got him the job under the table a year after he came back from GF)(He's 15 here) when filbrick gets a heart attack in the middle of stan finally standing up to him. Police investigation clears stan of fault, but the only family who can take him now are in Gravity Falls(Caryn moved out there after the divorce, but she's got her hands full w/ Shermie. It makes more sense for Stan to move in w/ his Great aunt and uncle)

So stan's f-ed up mindset in this is something along the lines of 'Grauntie Mable, who I like and respect, told me I am selfish and I need to stop acting that way and put everyone else's needs ahead of my own.

Pa, who I respect and care about, told me my only value was in producing money for the family. He said I was an unwanted child, and money is the only way to be part of the family.

Therefore, if I stay emotionally out of the way (no more suffocating) and provide for the family, I will be permitted to be part of things. Clearly, this is what Grauntie Mable has successfully done- the unwanted one who provided w/out suffocating, and is now a loved member of the family. This also explains great uncle mason's distaste for me- he knows I haven't earned enough to be part of the family.

Everything makes sense now!'

Not quite as bluntly as that, but you get the idea.

So Stan gets a job w/ Manly Dan's crew, doing as many hours as they'll let him over the summer(he arrived in Gravity Falls shortly after school let out for the year) and getting to be friends w/ Wendy, who's a few years older(not that she knows that, Stan's a bit on the smaller side at present for the lumberjacking crew but two years of dockworking leave him looking somewhat qualified for logging.)

This is the best summer Stan's had in awhile-he's making enough to pay for room and board and start to pay for the summer he stayed with them. He's even able to save a few dollars here and there for moving out in another year or so when he turns sixteen. If this keeps up, he might actually be able to get back on decent terms w/ his family! (just dont think about what happened to pa)

Said family, knowing none of this, barely see Stan at all over the summer (Ford's not exactly happy his brother not only doesn't want to catch up, or hang out, or even talk to him, but also won't share shifts in the Shack! He's had to do both their shifts all summer while Stan disappears to hang around town and...flirt or cause problems or...something!)

Dipper and Mable are increasingly convinced Stan's acting out after the sudden death of his father, but whenever they try to talk to him he just runs off! They're convinced he's joined up w/ the local Awful Teenager Squad, but can never get any answers out of him.

Things fall apart the first week of the school year, when Wendy spots Ford in town, mistakes him for Stan, and they do a whole little comedy of errors where Wendy makes assumptions based on her current knowledge and Ford refutes them w/ annoyance

(Stan!

What? No, I'm Ford, Stan's brother!

Oh, do you work in town?

Huh? No, I'm a junior in high school!

Oh, you're Stan's little brother!

Excuse me?!? We're twins, and I'm Older! By fifteen minutes! )

Wendy assumes the Shack must be doing poorly, finds out no, they're fine, asks stan about his schooling, gets told he was pulled out to work (when he was 14) and is left with a lot of questions and an old pair of twins to ask them to.

This is where Dipper and Mabel find out not only has Stan not been attending school, he's not registered to attend and that's why they haven't been notified of his truancy. Because he was pulled out two years ago. They ask Ford, he knows even less, and when everyone goes to confront Stan-

He doesn't see any problem. Why are they surprised, of course Pa pulled the dumb kid out of school. He's more useful working. Tell them? He thought they already knew, Pa said they had agreed with him when he told them about how terrible Stan's grades were on the phone. Anyways, why complain? He's making enough for room and board, and he should be out of the Shack on his sixteenth!

Added notes on the Lumberjack Option:

Wendy goes to Stan, tells him she saw his brother in town and thought it was him. Stan is delighted to tell her about his twin brother (its the most she's ever heard Stan say in relation to himself- he rarely speaks and is instead considered a very good listener- and its not even about Stan.) and what a great guy he is (he put up with Stan for twelve years with only minor complaints until the end, that's better that anyone except his parents managed, and they didn't last that much-don't think about it) and how he's graduating early, and-

Wow, says Wendy, you must be even smarter than him to have graduated even earlier!

Stan bluescreens for a few seconds, trying to compute that idea before blustering his way through an explanation.

(Its hard to explain to others how different Stan is from his twin without it hurting. He may have accepted it, but he still can't say aloud that he's worthless.)

He says he left without graduating a few years back, better to get a job and be making money than just sit in a classroom all day.

"And your uncle was okay with that? He used to lecture every teen in town on how we need a diploma to get anywhere in life!"

(Great-Uncle Mason has made it clear in the past that Stan's...too much and not enough.

Too much noise (jokes told no one laughed at, shouting greetings only to be shushed),

too much anger (bullies beaten up-Stan gets scolded for 'rising to their provocations', anomalies try to hurt them-Stan gets scolded for coming back injured),

too needy (clinging to Ford and getting increasingly pushed away as the summer goes on and Ford comes into his own, trying romance after romance and seeing nothing but failure(no one loves Stan but family, and even they have limits), Grauntie Mabel taking him aside just hours before Ford decides to stay and telling him how selfish he's been this summer and how worried she is that he'll push away his loved ones if he keeps being so self centered!

He needs to let Ford have his own friends and his own life- Stan can support that, right?)

Not useful enough (a money drain for the family)

not interesting enough (or Carla or Suzie would have stuck around) not smart enough (or Ford would actually want to spend time with him).

Pa and Great-Uncle Mason are just the only ones willing to say it to Stan's face.)

It wasn't like he would have succeeded anyways, Stan's too lazy! And dumb!

School's useless for a guy like Stan anyways.

---

Wendy doesn't go straight to Dipper and Mabel- she's not super close with them, and it seems kind of weird to immediately be questioning two people she doesn't know well on their financial status and treatment of their children.

Her dad, on the other hand, is a great source- except that he has no idea what's going on either and is fairly concerned about an underage child working in an industry as dangerous as lumberjacking (does he need parental consent forms? Is this anywhere near legal?)

So you get Manly Dan needing to let off some steam and talking about it with his boyfriend-the mayor. Who is, on the one hand not going to let Dan get arrested, but is also very worried about the Pines family finances (isnt the mother living on her own with the youngest son? Is that why the second youngest is working, to try and provide-oh, its so sad! Well, it can be fixed! These Jersey people have never really had to face the hospitality of a well-meaning small town before!)

And while waaay too much over the top friendliness and help prepares to descend on Caryn Pines (who is doing fine, thank you for asking. It's a pity her sons don't come and see her more often, but Ford is always running around with his friend and Stan is probably doing the same with his! he's still adjusting, heaven knows Caryn had to when she moved here! It would be nice if he would at least come to family dinners though)

Manly Dan and Mayor Cutebiker appear at the door of the Mystery Shack with a bunch of paperwork and some friendly (and once it becomes clear Mabel and Dipper know nothing about Stan's life at present, unfriendly) questions!

Dipper is adjusting his second favorite microscope when the knocking at the front door grows too loud to ignore.

When he answers, annoyed at being pulled away from his research into the composition of fairy dust, its to find Manly Dan and the mayor on his stoop with a large packet of paperwork.

"Hiya Doctor Pines! Sorry to bother you, but there's a tiny issue we need you to sign off on! Can we come in for a sec?"

The mayor smiles at Dipper as he lets them into the kitchen, Manly Dan dwarfing the table as he sits.

"So, I just want to assure you, Dan had no clue you hadn't filed the Oregon authorization papers, and the second he noticed, he called me, so no one should be in trouble."

"What?" Dipper frowns.

The mayor laughs awkwardly, patting Dan's shoulder. His expression hasn't changed this whole time from a frown.

"Well, you know how Stan's been spending the summer out in the woods with Dan's lumberjack crew? Wendy mentioned it to Dan and he came and got me, and-"

Dipper laughed, "Oh yeah, Stan's been a bit of a handful this summer-never around, none of his chores getting done. We didn't know he was bothering the lumberjacks though! If he's caused any problems, we'll be happy to give him a good talking-to when he gets home from school. Ford started up with his college level courses last week and he's already top of the class, did you hear? We're very proud."

Dan and the mayor turn to look at each other briefly before turning back to Dipper with much more concerned expressions.

"Doctor Pines, are you saying you have no idea what Stan's been doing this summer?"

"Well, his father died in May, so we were giving him some space to breathe. Mabel and I are always available for him to talk to, but he's just not ready yet, I suppose."

Another significant look. Dipper is getting tired of significant looks that aren't directed at him.

"Look, just tell me what Stan did, and Mabel and I will deal with it. We'll find him an after school job, something to teach responsibility. Axolotl knows he needs some."

Things went downhill from there.

Actually, now that I think about it, Stan's confused- but so is Dipper.

Dipper never noticed any issues-he got back, hugged Mabel, met his lovely great-nephews, and just...clicked with Ford's love of anomalies. He cares about Stan, obviously, but Stan's still young and in love with all the dumb things he and Mabel grew out of.

(That he grew out of naturally, and that Mabel left behind in a panic, desperately trying to keep her brother in her life as he wandered into adulthood)

They just don't have anything to talk about yet! Still, Dipper loves Stan. He thought that was obvious.

(It was not obvious to Stan, who saw his great uncle clearly prize intelligence and anomaly over everything else. Who never spent any time alone with Great Uncle Mason unless he was being punished.

Who believed Great Uncle Mason saw him as a nuisance at best, a leech at worst, only confirmed at the end of summer.

Stan doesn't particularly like Mason. He understands how his uncle is trying to get the useless one to do something right for once- hell, he even agrees!- but Grauntie Mabel at least showed she cared about him even though he wasn't worth it. Mason looked at stan like he was a tripping hazard.)

Sure Dipper's not as close to Stan, but they're family! Of course they love each other!

-Dipper sees none of the cracks in the family until half the town is on their doorstep, offering solutions for a problem he didn't know he had.

-He's been sort of protected from the consequences of his (lack of) actions/understanding by the family up until now- Ford hero worships him, Mabel puts his judgments ahead of her own for the most part, and Caryn is still extremely grateful for Dipper and Mabel's help getting set up.

-This is his wakeup call, where everything starts falling apart as it becomes clear he's only been looking at appearances (how many times has Mabels life fallen apart without Dipper paying enough attention to give her support? How many times has he assumed Ford's thoughts were the same as his own and moved forward without asking? Is Stan selfish?)

I see this leading to Dipper using time tape to try and fix a flashpoint moment, but increasingly seeing it wasn't just one moment that led to this, and it isn't just one person who's been affected. Think time traveler's pig but for stan and ford vs the future, where no matter what dipper tries to change-he can't. Offer to let both kids stay in gravity falls? stan doesnt want to be a burden and turns him down. Tell mabel she isn't selfish and is a great sister? She assumes its b/c of how much shes changed herself and is only more eager to pull stan aside. Ask ford to check on stan b/c dippers worried about him? Stan covers it up, and ford takes it at face value, like he has all summer.

Every day ends with ford celebrating his apprenticeship and stan disappearing . when dipper finally follows him, three to five loops in, he finds stan crying on the roof. They talk, it sucks, but eventually stan tells dipper how everything's gone wrong this summer and going home wont help anything b/c his pa hates him.

Dipper tries to brush it off, but stan shouts about the three dollar sign incident, then says

"And next time, Ford won't be there when I come inside. I dont want to put myself back together alone."

Dipper is absolutely ready to just keep stan here and now, live a happier three years, when the time police show up and reset everything (no blendins game here, no globnar). Dipper has to go three years ahead, nothing gained except for an understanding of stan and a lot of sympathy.

@shanklin

[jimmy-snakes]

Dear friend,

Given that Crabby just made a brief appearance, may I offer you a silly crossover doodle of little guys?

#FreeShrimpy

#FreeCrabby

This is not okay! The little Ghost Rider turned to the dark side and captured the two most innocent souls.

"Nonsense", the little Ghost Rider said. "Hell is actually quite bright with all the fires flaring! Now, stop doing crimes! It's wrong!

Crabby and Shrimpy crossed their arms and glared at the little Ghost Rider.

"You can't proof anything", said Shrimpy who had been adopted by and working for a cartel boss. "We did no crimes!"

"Yeah!", agreed Crabby. "Killing my dad doesn't count. He started it!"

The little Ghost Rider and Shrimpy both stopped and stared at Crabby.

"THAT WAS YOUR DAD?!"

Crabby, from the popular comic book series "The little Selfish Shellfish and the Shimmering Snake" has recently been cast in a small guest star role in "The little Ghost Rider" [name pending].

Shrimpy himself stars in @eviliens "Little Selfish Cleaner Shrimp" as a human with many names. One of them being Stanley Pines. I cannot reccoment it enough!

[otsalezu]

Sneak Peak of my Selfish Shellfish AU fic

I've tweaked it a little bit to my own liking so it isn't exactly like the original AU, but most things stay the same soooo. AU belongs to @shanklin afaik

Stanley woke up from his dream and, like usual, wished he never had. He’d dreamt of glitter glue and sparkles, of journals and constellation scars, of boats and six fingered hands. He’d dreamt of a cabin tucked into the woods, of solving mysteries and going on adventures. He’d dreamt of gnomes, unicorns, eyeballs with wings. 

Sure, he’d been the one with the idea to go back. He’d been the one who’d gone behind his twin’s back and begged his great aunt to let him go home. But he hadn’t realized how lonely it would be, or how badly he would miss Ford. This was the longest they’d ever been separated, almost a year. The calls helped, but hearing how much fun his twin was having back in Gravity Falls stung.

He also hadn’t remembered home being so painful. It was easier to take beatings and screamings fits from his father when he didn’t have to worry about protecting Ford. They didn’t come as often, either. Sneaking out just wasn’t as fun when there was no one to sneak out with, or to help him plan. However, there was something eerie about going back to a silent room with new bruises, quietly patching himself up. Everything felt more real, more drastic, when there was no one to talk to about it.

This night was different, though. His father was on the phone distantly, speaking gruffly to what Stanley assumed to be a client. He was ready to drift off back to sleep when he heard his twin’s name. His father had forbidden him from mentioning Ford, so why was he talking about him now? Stan crept towards the main room, trying to listen in.

“—Yeah, still with my wife’s batty aunt. I’m trying to pursue legal action–”

“What? You can’t do that! Ford likes it in Gravity Falls!”

His father turned towards him sharply, mumbling an excuse into the phone before slamming it down. 

“You just try to tell me what to do, boy?”

Most days, Stanley would have just slunk back to his room. Without a twin to protect, he had no need to put on a brave face. But when it involved Ford, he couldn’t stay silent. He balled up his fists, trying to make himself look as big as possible.

“You’ve got me, don’t ya? What do you need him for?”

“I got stuck with you, more like it. If I can get that brat back, this family can make some real money.”

“Doesn’t matter! I won’t let you take him away from Grauntie Mabel!”

“And how exactly are you gonna manage that, huh?”

His father towered above him, and Stan’s mind raced. He couldn’t beat his father in a straight fight, that much was true. But if he pushed him down the stairs, he might break one of his legs. That would show him! Then Stanley would take care of the shop while he healed, and his father would realize that Stan could make them just as much money as his twin. 

“I know a way to make money. I…left it outside.”

His father huffed, making his way towards the staircase as Stan backed up. He paused, as if listening for his son’s footsteps. Stan took a deep breath in, then made a run for his father and shoved with all his might. The man, usually sturdy and strong, was caught off guard. His father made a strangled sound as he turned in midair, eyes wide before—

Crack. 

His father lay unmoving at the bottom of the stairs, neck at a strange angle.

“Pa?”

There was no answer, 

“Pa, this isn’t funny.”

There was only silence.

“I’m sorry, okay? Just wake up.”

His father’s eyes simply stared blankly. He had killed him. His father had just wanted to help him, even if he was a bit rough, and he had lured him into a trap and killed him. He was a murderer of the worst kind. Tears welled in his eyes as he ran to find a bag, stuffing various clothes and bits of jewelry into it. Already a murderer, why not a thief too?, his mind supplied. He made his way back to the stairs, simply standing at the top. His father had not moved. 

“I’m…I’m gonna go now, okay Pa? Please don’t be mad.”

He descended the first step, legs shaking. He tried for a second, but collapsed under his wobbling knees. The rest of the journey down the stairs was more of a slide, until he was finally right above his father.

“Bye, Pa. I’ll be back soon, okay?”

He hated himself for lying to his father even in death, hated himself for being the cause of death, hated himself for making his father even need to call for Ford. If only he’d been a better son, been better at taking care of the shop, been smarter, then his father would be alive. He stepped over the body, swallowing his vomit. His hand rested on the doorknob for a moment. Stan thought back to all his moments in the house since Ford had left. Scrubbing windows until he had blisters, calloused fists squeezing his arms, silent nights with no twin to talk to. No, he didn’t think he was going to miss the house. Without another word, Stanley left.

[shanklin]

The Selfish Shellfish AU - Masterpost

Hi! I’m Shanklin Pinington!

Are you sick of sad stories that make you cry over Stan?

Then what you need is the Selfish Shellfish AU! The Selfish Shellfish AU won’t give you stangst. I repeat it won’t give you stangst.

(It gives you stangst.)

The AU

a short summary *

(* = silly stuff that has little to do with the actual AU)

miscellaneous asks

-in no particular order

they never visited, oh no why did they never visit?

some thoughts on Filbrick

the adults messed up, now what?

the Stan-o-War

flawed characters and how this AU came to be

what about Gideon?

gleeful about Mrs. Gleeful *

okay, but who killed Filbrick? - read the tags and find out

the ides of march *

happy end in weirdmageddon?

Stan & Ford & much more

emotionless Stan? *

relativity falls meet the shellfishies - now with more Dipper!

dreamscapers

chilling with the multibear

Grunkle Stan and the little shellfish

Stan explodes - with extra sound *

Stan explodes - and he really should

Fiddleford & Stan - or I made myself sad over robots

some fiddlestan

Ford's robot trauma

the one where Stan is mean to Ford

crimes with little Wendy, Soos & Stan

an unsend letter from Stan

Mullet Stan's brilliant advice

Grunkle Dipper and a smol lesson in manliness

the murder hut

crusty great uncle pie recipe *

care for a sandwich? *

stop the crimes *

plants and mushrooms part 2

the Comfort Anon Saga, aka ENTER SOOS

comfort anon gets jail time *

SOOS! - or the op accidentally writes a fic

roadtrip with Soos but this time there's a Shanklin in a Fez

MORE SOOS!

Stan adopting Shermie, what?

custody problems

Shermie & Stan - or drop the fic anon!

drop it anon! *

the drabble has been dropped! - and now I'm crying

sesame street to the rescue

sesame street but as a drabble!

more Shermie headcanons - and I make myself cry :/

loss of innocence - more anon drabbles

dark wizard detective Ford

old Ford the kidnapper?

-> anon's evil response

-> it continues with experiments

-> they're alive THEY'RE ALIVE

a graveyard reunion [different AU than above]

acab granny

enter the granny - in the reblog part

the great boomer brawl

Shankford *

promo pics

the adventures of the Selfish Shellfish and the Impossible Possum part 1 2

the Selfish Shellfish and the Shimmering Snake

knife origins

they're dead, so what?

the false fortune teller

fishing for an AU name

anon is way too good at this

op gets bullied into fishing *

op admits defeat *

a fishy selfie *

anon drops an angsty fish drabble

The Sad Selfish Shellfish and the Curious Case of the Deadbeaten Dad * - or we finally have a name!

we have a name, time to celebrate *

recs from the void

a song - something stupid and pretentious *

a song - see that no one's there *

a fic - with 5 parts even *

a song - when it happened to me *

you've come to shake my hand - two song recs but with a little bit extra Fiddleford and Soos

Pienons playlist

THERE ARE FICS! by

@eviliens

part one and part two

how I killed my father

little selfish cleaner shrimp

-> meme meme meme *

-> the great kidnapping *

-> the rescue mission *

-> songs recs *

@otsalezu

sneak peak

@marutianistic

the lumberjack - so far

-> ask version with some possum screamsin the middle

-> Dipper vs. Manly Danniess and the Mayor

@nexstage

it has come to this...

they're like a mirror part 1, part 2

pienon

Stan Goes Too

-> author's commentary

the kid that can work

-> house arrest

like father like son

>:)non

did you check the basement?

the cycle continues and I'm getting dizzy

Disclaimer: I only ever meant to post this little AU idea to get it out of my system so it can haunt someone else for once. Turns out I only managed to succeed in one of my goals.

There is no fixed plot I have in mind, just a lot of different ideas and sometimes incoherent thoughts. If you like something you read, you are more than welcome to cherry pick it and make up your own story. Have fun!