Do I need a shifting plan? No. But do I like setting a little shifting to do list based on what I feel like doing each attempt? Yes. It makes me feel productive. So with that said on tonights agenda is:
– Script until I reach delirious levels of sleepiness
– Affirm “I will shift in my sleep” until I drift off
The ridiculous thing about my PERSONAL shifting journey is that I KNOWWW its easy. Like literally in my bones, I fully understand the concept, im fully aware that I'm legit just consciousness and I could legit shift while writing this post. Like I'm so insanely aware of it that it's kinda annoying.
Most of the time I'm sitting here thinking "bro ur geeking, it's not that hard" and yet my dumbasssss still hasn't shifted. I don't have shifting doubt, I know it's real and have HAD my own experiences, but why am I so subconsciously so against letting myself shift.
Like I KNOW I'm in my own way, because even tho I'm a literal master shifter, ur girl just can't seem to reach it. Like I'm right there but I just missed the damn train.
I know I'm not stuck here and that, like I said, I could legit just shift now, but it's also just not happening, man. And please trust me when I say I do want it and I do try. I will try using all of the tools and that won't work, and then I won't use any tools because I know I don't need them to shift, and that won't work either.
AND I DO NOTTT make shifting a desire because I can't desire what I literally already have, so that shit isn't on a pedastool either. Like.
For fuck SAKES. STOP BEING SO STUCK UP AND JUST GOOOOOIWOSJWIDJEIW. I'm so over myself I could full on fling myself against a wall. I just want to grab my own face and tell myself to just let go and do it. In fact, I HAVE done that.
Lawd. I just can't put into words how CLOSE I know i am but also how stupidly I'm fumbling atm.
