Hi! I have been following your sentryagent writings/text posts for awhile and I love them 🙌
Thought of a request prompt idea inspired by a fic I read many years ago from another fandom- John and Bob have some sort of argument or fight and Bob runs away from the tower and the whole team goes looking for him but John’s the one who finds him out on the street and it’s very angsty and he’s begging Bob to come back and saying he will leave the tower instead so he doesn’t have to see him and then something something they make up bc I can’t handle angst without a happy ending lol
thank you so much !! i know people can cycle fandoms pretty quickly so it means a lot to me when readers stick around for a while 🫶 i ADORE the angst of this idea. the push and pull is delicious. sorry this took me forever i hope you will still enjoy it 💖
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Admittedly, there was a part of John that hoped he wouldn’t be the one to find Bob. He knew that he was the one person Bob absolutely did not want to see, knew that their reunion would not be a hug but a fight.
“Bob.” He called Bob’s name twice more, but Bob didn’t turn around. Smoke swirled around his head, the tip of his cigarette illuminating the railing of the bridge when he dropped his hand. “Bob, look at me. Bobby.”
“Don’t call me that,” Bob snapped. He took a long drag of smoke as John stopped at his side and leaned over the railing. The urge to rip the cigarette from his hand was strong. “I fucking hate it when people call me that.”
John knew that but he’d always been the exception. Especially after they got together, John was the one person who could call him Bobby. He nodded solemnly, trying to focus his eyes on the water below them.
“You shouldn’t be smoking,” said John, unable to hold his tongue.
“It’s your cigarette.” Bob snorted and rolled his eyes. “Fucking hypocrite.”
Bob had a point. He was a hypocrite. The entire fight was because he was a hypocrite. If he weren’t, maybe he would have had a leg to stand on. As it was, he had nothing. He was just the dick demanding his boyfriend quit nicotine when he wouldn’t kick the habit himself.
“Please come back,” John begged. All he could see was the breath leaving Bob’s lips, the slight shake of his shoulders, the purple hue of his toes beneath his crocs. “We need you to come home.”
“No.” Bob pulled away when John got too close, like he was repulsed by the hand he used to love to hold. “Just leave me alone. I’m not coming back. I don’t want to live with you anymore.”
John’s chest pounded, memories of Olivia’s exit ringing in the back of his mind. He’d done it again. He’d fucked it up again. He’d pushed away the love of his life again. John took a deep, trembling breath as he stepped back.
“I’ll go,” he suggested impulsively. “You go home and I’ll leave instead. You can go inside and warm up and you won’t have to see me ever again. Is that better?” Bob only shook his head and took another drag of the damn cigarette. “Everyone is worried about you. No one will care if I leave. Just go back and I’ll—”
“You’ll what?” asked Bob sharply. He gestured toward John dramatically, the sharp scent of smoke stinging his nose. “Where will you go?”
“Georgia, maybe.”
“No, you’ll jump off this fucking bridge.”
Bob sniffed and pushed his free hand through his hair, tears biting at the corners of his eyes. The way Bob said it confused John. He didn’t know whether Bob meant it like he wanted John to do that or like he was terrified that he might.
“You need to go home,” started John, sidestepping the comment completely. “I won’t follow you. You’ll never have to see me again.”
“Why would you do that?” Bob flicked ash over the railing, his voice thick and trembling from the cold. “Why would you leave for me?”
“Because I love you.”
“Don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Lie. Don’t lie to me.” A tear rolled down Bob’s cheek as he gestured with his cigarette, the small light standing out against the night air. “You’re an asshole. You don’t respect me at all. How can you love me if you don’t respect me?”
“I do respect you,” John insisted. “I didn’t tell you to stop the Zyns because I’m trying to baby you I did it because your last doctor’s appointment scared the shit out of me. I’m worried about you.”
“You don’t need to worry about me, I’m the Sentry. I’ll be fine.”
All his hesitations and impulse controls disappeared. He ripped the cigarette from Bob’s hand and gestured with it as he shouted. “No, you won’t. You won’t be fucking fine. They said you have blood pressure spikes and early arrhythmia patterns and shit circulation that—”
“Stop it!” Bob shoved John’s shoulder and reached for his cigarette, but John tossed it over the railing before he could grab it. That only spurred Bob on more. He hit John again, the punch sloppy enough to slide off John’s arm rather than hurt him. “You don’t know what you’re talking about so just shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up.”
“Bob—”
“No. I’m not coming back. I’m tired of being controlled. I’m so fucking tired of it.”
“I’m not trying to control you,” John snapped, his tone angrier than he meant it to come out. “I’m trying to keep your stubborn ass alive.”
“I don’t fucking want to be alive! I don’t—!”
He cut himself off suddenly, right hand flying to the left side of his chest. Bob pressed his palm over his heart, his throat working to release strained breaths. Without care for their fight, John wrapped his arms around Bob and pulled him into a hug. He rubbed Bob’s back gently, both to warm him up and calm him down.
John set two fingers on Bob’s neck, registered his palpitations, and took a deep breath to steady himself. “Does it hurt?”
“Yeah,” Bob whispered, sinking into John’s grasp like they hadn’t fought at all. “A little.”
“Okay. You’re all right. You just gotta take some deep breaths. Let’s sit down for a second.”
He kept his arms on Bob as he lowered them to the cold concrete beneath their feet. Bob grasped John’s coat as he curled almost instinctively into John’s side. He needed to be the one to go back to the tower. He needed the warmth, his bed, his medications.
“I’ll text Yelena to come get you,” said John without thinking. “She’ll walk you home and I’ll… I’ll go somewhere.”
“No, don’t. Don’t leave me.” Bob buried his face in John’s shoulder, his chest pounding rapidly and irregularly beneath his light sweatshirt. “I can’t— I— I need you to help me breathe. I—”
“Shh. Okay. It’s okay. I got you.” John hesitated before he kissed Bob’s hair shakily. He adjusted his hands, pulling Bob closer to him like he could singlehandedly keep him warm. “Bob, you know I love you right? I only said what I said because I love you.”
“I know. I love you. I— I can’t talk. Count, please. Please.”
John nodded. He traced lines into Bob’s back as he counted, walking him through the steps of box breathing until his breathing and heart rate stabilized. Once Bob was ready, John helped him back to his feet and they walked home together, their hands never separating once.
so because ive got top surgery coming up (!!!!) i need to quit nicotine, or at least reduce it as much as possible - particularly as im getting nipple grafts. ive been a daily nicotine user for about six years, i switched from rollups to vapes about a year ago. ive been cutting down vaping and trying to do it more intentionally, and ive decided once my vape dies im going to buy zyns and use those to help with cravings. so far it’s been going well, i definitely have cravings and some withdrawals (mostly nausea and irritability) but nothing unmanageable. if anyone has any tips for quitting vapes and/or general nicotine use pls let me know T.T
