stella ❤️‍🩹

"her instinct is to fight. to live." • . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁꒰ঌ·✦·໒꒱ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. • read pinned for more info!

[stella-and-the-pinks]

hello world! my name is stella, i'm around 20 years old and i use she/her pronouns. i'm a co-host of the pinks system, a disordered traumagenic system. you can learn more about us on our main blog!

i'm also our medical manager, and a couple other things. the body is moderately disabled/chronically ill, and it's my job to deal with all that comes with that!

i'm a fictive of stella grant from five feet apart, but i'd say i'm pretty separated from source. this feels like maybe an okay place to say i'm a lesbian now, please don't send asks about will or anything like that. the body also does not have cystic fibrosis, we have other chronic illnesses! please be normal about fictives, thanks!

you can send asks, but please be nice and respectful! i will delete any ask and block any sender that makes me uncomfortable!

i'm an adult, sometimes i interact with nsfw! usually of my fandoms! if you are a minor or simply don't want to see that, i tag all nsfw as #nsft and #mdni for your convenience!

some interests of mine...

healthcare · fiction writing · dogs · medical dramas · dan and phil (youtubers) · medical marijuana · social media · christianity · video editing · disability justice · reading · & more

...this blog will mostly be comprised of the above interests as well as things about being the host of a system!

you may notice christianity in the list -- i am a progressive adult-converted christian! please filter #tw christianity and #tw religion to avoid christian-related posts!

-> tag guide

#stella og: any original post. reblogs with substantial text fall in this category too!

#stella sys: anything about being a part in a system!

#five fictives apart: anything related to my source, five feet apart, or being a fictive in general!

#chronically stella: anything related to chronic illness, disability, or being the medical manager of a system! sometimes autism/neurodiversity stuff goes here as well, despite not being chronic illness.

#autistella: anything related to autism spectrum disorder.

#stella interests: any reblog or original post of my interests, listed above!

#stella vent: any vent post. mostly original text posts, but some reblogs fall under this category as well. also trigger tagged with "#tw (trigger)" as much as i remember to! send an ask if i miss something!

#stella queue: anything from the queue. mostly reblogs, some original posts!

[stella-and-the-pinks]

my controversial disability opinion is that care support for recreational activities should be available & funded by the government for disabled people in the exact same way caregivers for basic needs should be. i don't care that they're not "essential" activities, i want disabled people to thrive, not just live.

[artemishaspens]

My first ever comic! I’m still really proud of it and honestly the way the UK govt is going right now it feels ever more relevant.

[i-wheely-love-poodles]

Privileges of being visibly disabled (sarcastic) edition:

People ask you about your medical history at random and sometimes without even a cursory greeting

People target you because they know you (presumably) can’t fight back

People treat you as both more or less capable than you actually are (whichever is more ableist)

Infrastructure is not accessible in many ways and even hostile at times (impacting those with blindness, deafness, mobility aid users, and more)

Your rides from apps get canceled due to your disability equipment

People get grossed out by what keeps you alive (ostomies, tubes, ports, etc)

People grabbing and moving you without consent

Being treated like furniture the more you are perceived to be disabled

Feel free to add your thoughts or other brilliant suggestions for this list.

[stella-and-the-pinks]

as much as i have periods of time where i am frustrated with my wheelchair, where i don't want to use it, where i avoid using it, where it overwhelms me or makes situations worse etc, i still never relate to the narrative of wheelchairs being the most tragic disability aid or whatever.

my wheelchair is like a close family member. sometimes she frustrates me, sometimes i don't want her to be there, sometimes i even hate her, but above all of that, i love her. she helps me do things i wouldn't be able to do without her.

it's not inherently tragic that she's in my life in the same way that it's not inherently tragic to have a mother, a close sister, or a life-long best friend. it's a nuanced relationship that has it's highs and lows, but never do i feel like i would be better off without her.

the things that are tragic about using a wheelchair have nothing to do with the chair.

the assumption that i must hate something i love so much is tragic. widespread inaccessibility and other systemic barriers for disabled people is tragic. healthcare inequities are tragic. educational inequities are tragic. discrimination in the workplace is tragic. how hard it is to access a wheelchair is tragic.

none of that has anything to do with the wheelchair itself though, that's all people.

happy (belated) international wheelchair day, and roughly six months since i got my current chair!

[puppiegracie]

everybody can suck my fat cock and balls btw I hate all of you who are crying infantilization of Mel King, competent and capable and intelligent and empathetic Mel King. whatever I'm not softening my takes anymore. she's GREAT rep, and has been in EVERY episode. the second an autistic person drops their mask you show your bias.

you only allow autistics who high mask. you only allow autistics who don't "act autistic." YOU are infantilizing Mel King. she's not acting like a fucking child at all. she is struggling. and WE ARE DIFFERENT THAN YOU. fuck you suck my dick

[stella-and-the-pinks]

i'm moderate support needs, but as someone who has a lot of low support needs autistic people in my life, i find that mel from the pitt is exactly what i mean when i say "low support needs does not mean no support needs" and is very representative of the low support needs people that i know.

i think representation of low support needs autistics often falls flat by way of portraying things like struggles with social skills, being very intelligent, differences in affect, stimming, etc, but failing to include what support they need for their disability. and the pitt does show all of those things in mel, but also shows certain small ways that she has different needs for regulation/etc than the other characters in the show.

i think mel is also a really great example (at certain points) of proactively using tools to support herself, like when we see her watch the lava lamp video, facetimes her sister for a few minutes, and puts her headphones in to take breaks at different points during season one. in my opinion, that stimming break is a great example of what a low support need might look like.

i think these small ways of self-supporting are potentially a reason why many autistics are told that we can't really be autistic, or we don't need support at all -- we do need and use supports of various kinds, but they're not always super obvious.

anyways, i am a frequent critic of autism representation, and mel truly feels like a breath of fresh air to me.

[stella-and-the-pinks]

if you're disabled and/or chronically ill, i cannot stress enough how much you deserve friendship.

if your conditions make it hard for you to follow through with plans, you deserve friendship anyways.

if you use equipment like mobility aids, aac, ventilators and oxygen, feeding tubes, insulin pumps, etc, you deserve friendship anyways.

if your conditions make you have to cancel last minute a lot, you deserve friendship anyways. if your conditions make you have to leave early a lot, you deserve friendship anyways.

if you're housebound/bedbound, you deserve friendship anyways.

if you need caregiver support to hang out with friends, you deserve friendship anyways AND you deserve the caregiver support you need to enjoy time with them.

if you have a service dog, you deserve friendship anyways.

if your conditions cause "scary" medical episodes like seizures, fainting, meltdowns and shutdowns, etc, you deserve friendship anyways.

if you're disabled and/or chronically ill, i cannot stress enough how much you deserve friendship.

[nenenotrouble]

Not only do you deserve friendship, you deserve friends who don’t resent your disability, who don’t hold your disability against you, who fight for your accomodations, who are not friends with you Despite your disability, but because you are simply a person that they enjoy.

I cannot emphasise that enough that you deserve kind friends too.

[stella-and-the-pinks]

seeing the shot of dr santos's scars this episode and also knowing that everything means something in this show has me extremely spooked

[stella-and-the-pinks]

"WHEN YOU SEE ME, IN HERE, STILL THE BOSS!!!!!!!!"

oh so that's gonna come back to bite us i'm sure

[stella-and-the-pinks]

bystanders are shocked as disabled girl stops pushing her wheelchair just to take a massive rip off her geek bar

[stella-and-the-pinks]

if you think disability rights and accessibility and healthcare and stuff is super advanced in any country or place right now, you probably haven't spent enough time talking to higher support needs disabled/medically fragile people.

[ableist-log]

fucked up thing is. the more disabled u are, the more stuff you have to do every day just to function.

cant transfer yourself to wheelchair? now u have to schedule carers every time u might want to move from chair to bed or toilet, have to staff these shifts, sacrifice your alone time/comfort/independence, teach them how to safely transfer u, remind them every time, purchase and maintain expensive equipment etc.

can't pee or poo in the typical way? have to do lots of steps for catheter use or bowel program or ostomy care. have to take special meds. have to travel with medical equipment, wipes, etc in all your bags now. have to buy and store it all too. have to deal with all the ableism from people about this too

just. every basic task splits into infinitely smaller tasks like some kind of fractal of bullshittery

[stella-and-the-pinks]

i think that some people forget that disabled people are abused at incredibly disturbing rates. and many disabled people cannot escape abuse independently, or at all.

many disabled people cannot escape abuse without putting their health and care needs at risk.

many disabled people cannot escape abuse because they have no money, or they're not allowed to access it independently.

many disabled people cannot escape abuse because they can't talk or otherwise communicate to tell someone they are being abused.

many disabled people cannot escape abuse because they don't understand what abuse is or because they don't understand that they are being abused.

please remember disabled people that cannot escape abuse. please remember that your tips on how to escape abuse don't apply to everyone. please advocate for programs that help disabled people escape abuse. please check in on your disabled friends.

[stella-and-the-pinks]

if you rely on highly stigmatized medications to survive and/or function, such as opioids, stimulants, medical marijuana, antiretroviral therapy, antipsychotics, benzodiazepines, and more, i cannot stress enough how much you deserve safe and reliable access to the treatment that works for you, to be listened to and understood by all of your providers, and most of all, how much you deserve to live as happy and healthy of a life as you can, whatever that looks like for you.

[skeletomez]

[asexual-amanita]

Please stop treating people with gastrointestinal disabilities as a disgusting untouchable thing. Reflux, rumination, and vomiting are normal for many of us, and while I don’t expect everyone to not be scared of puke, I would encourage you to stop staring, treat me with dignity, and not remind me of how gross you think I am.