Gomenasigh

Tanu/Riley, a 31yr old Cat Uncle from Massachusetts. He/him ✌️I'm most likely sorry.

[vampantheon]

pros of being on testosterone: my kermit impression is getting better

cons of being on testosterone: my Mort from Madagascar impression is getting worse

[slimepost-generator]

i……..

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had……

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the slime of my life

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and I’ve never felt this way before

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and I swear

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It’s the truth

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[virtualgirladvance]

[idontevenhaveone]

... the worst bit is I know several people this could be, especially given the 'in Australia' clarification

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

If you know them then there's a chance I might know some of them and that thought will keep me up at night.

[antikate]

This wasn’t the guy who we all know who used to spray his jeans with Mortein and then light himself on fire, was it?

[harlemshakemp3]

He used to sit at the back of the bus, cup his hand, spray deodorant into it, then open it and light it on fire with a lighter in one fell swoop to try and impress girls.

He had to stop because the bus company begged our school to tell him to stop bc of legal liability. His hands never actually got damaged after doing it for about a year.

[harlemshakemp3]

I reached out to my old friend in question here, because I've been thinking about him all day.

I do not know what "the amulet" is. I have no idea what "the amulet" is referring to.

[harlemshakemp3]

I instantly remembered when he said that.

While we were all at the local park doing legal things that teenagers would do back in the late 2000s, my friend here found a rock at our old smoke spot that was unusually smooth and flat. He liked it so much that he took it to the woodwork classrooms at school, drilled a hole in it, and hung it on a necklace.

When we asked why he weanwearing this dinky-ass pebble on his neck, he claimed it prevented him from ever getting food-related illnesses: wouldn't get food poisoning, couldn't over-eat, was able to ingest anything (prior to him finding The Amulet, a few of us used to play a game called "Devil's Piss" where we would take turns shoving random food bits into a bottle of coke, and the first person to take a sip would get two dollars from the other players).

When we all asked him for the proof that this rock is magical—because nobody believed him, obviously—he said to meet him behind the History block at lunch, where he said he would drink two litres (or half a gallon) of milk in one go and not puke.

We met him there, and about ten of us all watched him down a whole bottle of strawberry milk in two or three breaths.

He didn't puke.

He jumped up and down and punched his stomach to prove it.

He still didn't puke.

I'm so glad I'm alive.

[themythicalcodfish]

this is why you go outside, something like this could never be scripted

[the-haiku-bot]

this is why you go

outside, something like this could

never be scripted

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[narutwitter]

[haaarpb]

the comic, the backstory

[slyandthefamilybook]

why did they start breeding busses to have flat faces. they can't breathe

[slyandthefamilybook]

if you think this

looks better than this

you're part of the problem. I'm so tired of all the excuses like "oh they look cuter!" "why do you care?" THEY CAN'T BREATHE. People intentionally breeding these vehicles to give them health problems because they "like how it looks" makes me so mad

[the-starlight-papers]

Actually, flat faced buses can breathe fine! This is a case of convergent evolution, but the two types of buses are not genetically related.

Pointed nose buses are decended from trucks, and have their engines located in the front. This requires the larger nose in order to provide the space for the engine as well as adequate ventilation.

Meanwhile, flat nosed buses are actually descended from city buses (which in turn descend from trolleys), and were domesticated due to their greater maneuverability and capacity.

Contrary to popular belief, flat nosed busses typically do not experience breathing problems. Their engines are located in the back of the bus, with a large breathing vent located in the rear.

These buses also have a different structure to accommodate this change, typically including doubled back tires, a different weight distribution, and a change in location of the emergency egress door from the back to the left side.

[stormy-nights-are-best]

If only pugs could breathe through their butt too :((

[rottingtrouble-child]

I saw this video about a doctor who performed an MRI on a 5 year old and discovered she essentially had “brain damage” from excessive iPad use, as the white matter in her brain couldn’t form properly due to an understimulated environment.

Hmm it’s almost like there’s supposed to be adult figures responsible for monitoring her screen time and making sure she develops properly… certainly this isn’t the result of neglect at the hands of her parents…

[rottingtrouble-child]

“This 5 year old is brain damaged by excessive iPad use”

Translation: This 5 year old is developmentally impaired by neglectful parents who used an iPad as a stand-in for social and environmental stimulation / interaction for hours at a time during critical early stages of child development. The iPad is the cop-out.

[rottingtrouble-child]

“Children don’t have the strength to hold pencils anymore because they only use screens.”

Translation: Parents aren’t making the conscious effort to help their children develop necessary skills and letting iPads raise them.

When are people going to realize the iPads and whatnot are the instruments through which the neglect is happening through and not the cause? How the fuck do you let your child have such a severe lack of physical strength in their hands that they can’t hold a pencil properly?

[rottingtrouble-child]

People will see a study suggesting children with higher screen times have poorer or negative developmental outcomes and immediately say it’s the screens causing this, and not the more likely fact that higher screen time = less engagement time with their environment, physical exercise, parents, family, and their peers, all of which are NECESSARY for a healthy upbringing as a social species.

It’s like saying a dog who was kept in a cage all its life and left with atrophied muscles was damaged by the cage, and not by the fact its owners were too lazy to play or walk their dog in order for its muscles to build properly. The cage is the instrument of neglect and the owners are the perpetrators, in the same way parents are the perpetrators and weaponizing screen time as an excuse and painting themselves as helpless bystanders.

[iamwizzzzz]

[hotvampireadjacent]

Taylor Swift fans pay $32 for garbage from outside wedding

The garbage was from outside the barriers that surrounded Madison Square Garden for Swift’s wedding. Read more at straitstimes.com. Read mor

[duncebento]

they probably pay $32 for garbage from taylor swift every year-- each time she releases an album!

[potatocrisp]

Gettin the good ads again

[videos-i-didnt-make]

facesofevil.mp4

[finnwolfhards]

this is superior humor

[duke-chainsaw]

I have some to add:

[pyros-random-thoughts]

M O R E

[oh-great-autistic-gay]

I hope you enjoy

[lamignonette]

[cheddar-baby]

i need to gush about how incredibly seamless her compositing is in these. Compositing is incredibly hard and time consuming work on a crisp clean digital image. But compositing into what seems to be a scanned photograph that was shot on film? Insane work. The film grain + photo paper texture is matched perfectly as well as the varying softness from being slightly out of focus in different amounts in each image. Each film stock has its own specific tone too some are warmer, others are more purply, or green and they all handle contrast with light and shadow completely differently. There was so much to take into account doing this and i really dont know how she did it other than maybe finding those locations again and shooting with the same film stock on a day with similar lighting. I cannot stress enough that for professional photographers doing complex compositing is mostly relegated to having a fully locked down camera set up in studio under controlled repeatable lighting. Super impressive and a really fantastic photo series truly.

[theweirdwideweb]

[rimonoroni2]

unfortunately very true. Doing Better does not always mean never being upset or never being triggered or never having trouble. often Doing Better means experiencing those things and being able to keep going/cope healthily/move on. if you’re in a bubble with no sensation, if you’re numbing yourself out, that’s not what recovering really is. it won’t help you have a happier life it’ll just make your world smaller and smaller until you can’t fit anywhere anymore. gotta learn to make peace with the hard stuff too, that’s the only way to keep going

[magicratfingers]

[deadpsalmistsociety-deactivated]

hobbits were the peak of civilization in tolkien verse. jobs were Gardening, Stall At The Farmer’s Market, or Mailman. Shoes OFF, capris ON, 6 meals a day, high and fat as all shit. Names like Daddy Twofoot….why the fuck are we horny for elves

[english-history-trip]

[violaslayvis]

Cargo shorts are one of the ugliest clothes ever invented. Next to overalls.

[chavorruco-noventero-deactivate]

Cargo Shorts are useful when you’re meeting a white bear in the desert and have to carry Gun Oil, condoms, weed, a crowler of craft beer and your 3DS XL with pokemon moon so

[antiandrogen]

Just carry a purse…

[chavorruco-noventero-deactivate]

But I told him I was masc :(

[elevan-deactivated20250122]

:(

[simena]

Anastasia Yarygina