Too many people think system accountability is "I'm sorry (alter) did that" instead of "I'm sorry I did that"
If you're not acknowledging your faults then you're not taking accountability. Alters are you, you are them. Something your alter did to someone is still something you did to someone. Don't apologize on behalf of your alter. It doesn't fix anything. Apologize yourself and take accountability for your mistake. "Oh I wasn't fronting but--" "That was (alter) but--" "It wasn't me but--" Those are not apologies.
I know it's hard to grasp that you don't remember something you did in that moment, but the person you did it to does and that's what matters. It's okay to struggle with this. When you do something so out of character and you don't even remember it it's hard to come to terms with. But it's something that many need to work on in themselves.
This is not talking about all systems. Just many I've seen and interacted with.
I say this respectfully, but sometimes taking accountability includes making sure even though a specific system member doesn't remember, that the memory is there for the one who was fronting. Not just blindly going forward and allowing your memory gaps of those moments to be weaponized.
Because there are and will be people who are not against weaponizing a systems dissociation and memory gaps to manipulate them. So yeah. Accountability as a system is a good thing... but you should also make sure the thing you are being told you need to take accountability for actually happened first.
