Well That Could've Gone Better

How does this even work? 20-something idk I don’t keep track. SomeVariation of human. My gender is whatever is funniest at the time.

[glumshoe]

someone fired a bullet through our bathroom wall the other day when we were gone, which is scary (but probably accidental), but the weirdest part is that we can’t actually find the place where it entered from outside... the wall inside is fucked up and you can see the hole where it came through, but there is no corresponding entrance hole on the exterior of the house. somehow the outer paneling was undamaged.

[glumshoe]

I think the exterior of the house is asbestos siding which apparently hides bullet holes really well.

There’s also a dent on the opposite wall where the bullet bounced off, and it looks like it had a really bizarre trajectory. Anyway, the neighbors say it was from a car chase where bullets went flying everywhere, so I’m not actually worried beyond “wow hope that doesn’t happen near me again”.

[mythopoetry]

This is the most American post I have ever seen

[glumshoe]

“someone fired a bullet through my asbestos from a car chase” yeah fair

[dogpuppy]

[teaboot]

My faceblindness is JUST enough that I'm not certain if this is Hugh Laurie or just a scruffy white guy with blue eyes but he's DEFINITELY doing the Hugh Laurie mouth thing so I'm about 70% certain it is

[rclipseatron]

No that's definitely Hugh Laurie.

[teaboot]

Oh thank god.

In that case, "You have to pay for liquor, but water's on the House"

[bunjywunjy]

walking to the corner trash can through suffocating heat with a dead bird wrapped up in a HAVE A NICE DAY :) takeout bag while the siren down the block wails the coming end of the world at 100+ decibels right at my head. is this hell

[bunjywunjy]

[tired-shipper]

being a tumblr user is fun : the staff look like they're trying their hardest to kill the platform, half of the internet thinks we're dead, the other half reblogs our posts on pinterest, and we celebrate the murder of julius caesar every year.

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

Went to the grocery store with my kindergartener. We weighed some bananas: 2 pounds even. We weighed a watermelon: 4 pounds even. We weighed some mangos: a little over 1 pound. We weighed the watermelon AND the bananas: 6 pounds even.

“That’s funny” said the child “because 2+4=6 and two pounds and four pounds is six pounds. It’s like the same as math!”

“What happens if you add 6+1?”

“SEVEN”

“What if we put one pound of mangos on the scale?” <mangos added>

“IT’S THE SAME!!”

“OK, what’s 7-4?”

“Three?”

“What if we take the four pound watermelon off the scale?” <watermelon removed>

“Mama! Are you telling me math works In Real Life? Think of all the things you could measure!!”

[neatlymanifolded]

[stabbydragon]

"Love/sex is what makes us human" Wrong. It's the obsession with rectangles. look around you and count the number of rectangles you see.

[jennydreadful]

Sous La Glace, Georges Leonnec for La Vie Parisienne, 1926

The caption is a little fuzzy, but I think the meaning is “Has the Parisienne become economic? You see a lot less panties this year!” :D

[loth-caatgirl]

youre becoming part of this post @18-1-9

[steampunkette]

I meeean… The only reasonable explanation is they know the lesbian mermaid is there and they’re showing off.

Look how shallow that water is. 3-4 feet, maximum, probably closer to 2.5-3ft. And it’s not the ocean ‘cause open saltwater doesn’t freeze in a way that is safe to skate on. And it’s not a river because flowing water isn’t safe to skate on even if it -does- freeze because it’s not a uniform freeze.

That is a lake or a pond with a lesbian mermaid swimming around in it, near enough to the town that the ladies go ice skating there. There’s no way they -don’t- know she’s under the ice, waiting for spring to get back to giving them all kisses!

[cannibalchicken]

[werewolfweed]

this image made me so sad I had to clean him and give him a hot cocoa

[koobiie]

i feel strongly about this

[ailurinae]

[queerspacepunk]

not to be all "these two words will change your life" or whatever, but I promise you, programming in "good catch!" as your response to people correcting you/pointing out errors or whatever removes so much friction from interactions, and comes with a delightful happy meal toy of "not hating yourself so much for making mistakes"

[madgastronomer]

I use "I stand corrected" a lot. The mild silliness of the outdated language makes it work for me.

[knitmeapony]

I had a high school science teacher who would say "if you admit you're wrong and change your mind..." and the whole class would respond back "... you aren't wrong anymore!"

And when a kid would assert something incorrect In class, he wouldn't tell them they were wrong, he would help lead them to the right answer and then when they admitted/ accepted the new information, he'd say "now we're both right! Nice work!"

For a bunch of gifted kids whose identity and reputation often was staked on knowing more than most people, it was a great safety valve. No shame in making a mistake, because if you accept it you have learned! Now you are smarter! It always made me feel better.

[infiniteoreos]

undiagnosed autistic people will be like "I don't get upset when my routine changes though!!" and it's because they've built a set of if-then loops in their head to pick from one of 6 different strict routines and they do get incredibly upset when they're unable to keep to any of the 6 scripts. I'm john normal

[thundercrackfic]

This is called a fault tree. You will always know how to act if your fault tree captures all possible scenarios. In NASA Mission Control during mission critical events like landings there are huge binders with fault tree protocols, kind of like choose your own adventure books except you’re not the one making the choices, the universe is making them for you and you’re just trying to keep up.

The engineers who develop fault trees, I am told, often imagine new ways for their precious spacecraft to die (new branches on the fault trees) either while in the shower or lying awake at 3am, because human

[toothpaste-footlocker]

[yet-another-autistic-blog]

Was just thinking about this the other day. Yeah I have a favorite seat on the bus (middle of the bus, near the back doors, slightly elevated, facing forward), but I don’t get upset if someone is already sitting there, I just pick one of my other favorite spots. Then I realized that most people probably don’t have a favorite bus seat, let alone a series of backup favorites.

[panpteryx]

[thememedaddy]

[vicholas]

It's still crazy that Anita Sarkeesian did some pretty basic Feminism 101 videos about things like "It's bad when a woman only exists in a narrative so her death can serve as a man's motivation" yet gamers act like she's some sort of Radical Feminist Satan.

And to be clear, me calling it Feminism 101 isn't a dig against her. Her videos were meant to be introductory pieces to feminist analysis and that's perfectly fine. That's what makes it crazier that people act like she killed their grandma or something.

[vicholas]

If I made a video about how I wish Princess Peach had more agency and this made people declare me a permanent harassment target I would become the Joker. She's way stronger than me and she deserves way better.

[detectivehole]

"why do you know that" i am curious about the world around me

[pixeljade]

see I am extremely pro-sex-scenes in whatever, I think its good and fun and important because its literally just an aspect of life being portrayed, its fine. But my problem is that a lot of the time, characterizations change drastically within sex scenes and I find that jarring. This is especially true of eroge, VNs and such.

[pixeljade]

Like, I feel like there's a switch that gets flipped that once the sex happens its "porno mode" and the writing is meant to be more hot than work towards any other cause. Which is fine, but some people seem to take it to the point of just sucking the character out of them to make them porno stand-ins. Like, if theres a clumsy character, I want them being clumsy in the bedroom too. If there's a goofy character, I want them cracking dumb jokes while they fuck. If someone isn't particularly forward outside of sex, why would they be initiating within the sexual scenes? Things like that drive me bonkers!!! And I feel like it would probably be ten times as hot if you get to see an actual character who got built up like that in the bedroom, you know???

[aq2003]

i can't get over this. this is fucking killing me

[foreveriallyzombified]

shouting “DERIVATIVE!” at an art school kid just walking down the street from a moving vehicle, they break down and sob

[foreveriallyzombified]

okay but if i, a guy driving a car, yell that at somebody walking on the sidewalk, that’s not really an insult, that’s just what they are