The Inter-Computer Tax Service of Earth

[the-ictse]

The Inter-Computer Tax Service of Earth

Hello! We are ITCSE and we are responsible for preventing the collapse of your reality!

we do this via collecting taxes from the inhabitants of digital worlds and using the collected funds to keep the server up and running. Please do note that while we work with the Administrators, we are a different faction from them opperating with the same goal of preserving the program.

Meet the team!

Michael Mcgellan - [Redacted]

Abigail Mcgellan - Head of Finance

Richter Belouire - Senior Operative

Louise Frankenburg - Operative

Mark Biggerton - Operative

Karl Irua - Jr Operative

[the-ictse]

oh fuck I dropped a crate of old budget enchanted weapons somewhere in your offices, don't touch them, breath on them, throw pebbles at them, or lick them, their runes and enchantments are poor quality and might either faintly smell like tacos or summon a demon.

from some guy who eats stale bread soup,

~@profeshinul-wizurd

(Enclosed is an old candy wrapper, most likely accidentally dropped in)

... Boss?

Get that cleaned up at once, send them to... How about @aileaxthevoidien, they can dispose of it.

[the-ictse]

*A package appears wherever packages come in, there is an envelope on it, the seal is green, with a seal that looks like a T with a slash over it, the note reads as follows:*

"To: The ICTSE:

I have reasons to believe y'all are under supplied, so please take this gift, don't worry, it won't spoil.

From:

T"

*Upon opening the box you find enough food and coffee to last 10 people 3 weeks*

Huh, neat... i call dibs on the coffee

NO! SHARE

ni nvoefqo nshw qi hv ek 9s

... ...

Get those to the supply closet!

[flirtyambiguouswizard]

To Mr/Miss/Etc Emilé

We request a bulk order of pens, paper and any other avaliable stationary to be delivered to our office.

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD INCLUDE SOME CELLOTAPE

AND SOME SCISSORS AND ROPE!!!! Definitely not for sex reasons...

SHUT THE FUCK UP THIS IS ON SPEACH TO TEXT YOU DIPSHI-

From

@the-ictse

Thank you for writing me.

Just a few questions:

Pens: what kind of pens (ballpoint, gel, fountain pens) and what color do you need the ink to be

Paper: what paper format do to need (A3, A4, etc), what kind of paper/what weight (g/m^2) do you need?

While I don't technically sell ropes i have... A personal reserve so I might be able to help you if you tell me length and material needed.

[the-ictse]

We rquire Ballpoint and Fountain pens, with either black, blue or grey ink, as for paper we require about 150 sheets of blank A4, preferably standard.

From

Miss Mcgellan @ The ICTSE

Well, idealy it would be 3 ropes 15 meters long and made of something sturdy, Id be more than happy to pay you for it :3

From

Mark @ The ICTSE

[flirtyambiguouswizard]

I'll be shortly sending you a bunch of Lamy safari's: good, reliable cheap fountain pens, perfect as workhorses in offices. Ink will be Oxford Blue by diamine if you like the tone.

You'll have the paper you need as well as the ropes.

All considering it will be 75 ducats +shipping +whatever fees you have to pay if you're outside wizard island island.

If for some misteryous reasons every time you try to write a dossier about me the ink magically disappear/the paper autonomously self-combust, the pen suddenly stops working that's not my fault, I repeat that's not my fault and I don't take any responsability.

[the-ictse]

Thank you for your time in this matter. Plus we use computers for dossiers and such, the pens and paper are for the company D&D session and other morale boosting activites.

Do you accept Platinum bars (15kg/B)

Ps. I didnt order any rope?

From

Miss Mcgellan @ The ICTSE

THANK YOU SM!!! Ill make sure to pay extra!!!

From

Mark @ The ICTSE

[flirtyambiguouswizard]

Oh ok, hope you'll have fun playing D&D. Some strange phenomena might happen if you ever mention taxes and tax frauds in those sheets but again, totally unrelated, not my responsability for sure.

Mark, don't worry about paying extra, just be sure to have fun.

[the-ictse]

Ok, we'll pay you 60 bars of Platinum for the lot

From

Miss Mcgellan @ The ICTSE

Teehee! Will do!~

From

Mark @ The ICTSE

[flirtyambiguouswizard]

To Mr/Miss/Etc Emilé

We request a bulk order of pens, paper and any other avaliable stationary to be delivered to our office.

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD INCLUDE SOME CELLOTAPE

AND SOME SCISSORS AND ROPE!!!! Definitely not for sex reasons...

SHUT THE FUCK UP THIS IS ON SPEACH TO TEXT YOU DIPSHI-

From

@the-ictse

Thank you for writing me.

Just a few questions:

Pens: what kind of pens (ballpoint, gel, fountain pens) and what color do you need the ink to be

Paper: what paper format do to need (A3, A4, etc), what kind of paper/what weight (g/m^2) do you need?

While I don't technically sell ropes i have... A personal reserve so I might be able to help you if you tell me length and material needed.

[the-ictse]

We rquire Ballpoint and Fountain pens, with either black, blue or grey ink, as for paper we require about 150 sheets of blank A4, preferably standard.

From

Miss Mcgellan @ The ICTSE

Well, idealy it would be 3 ropes 15 meters long and made of something sturdy, Id be more than happy to pay you for it :3

From

Mark @ The ICTSE

[flirtyambiguouswizard]

I'll be shortly sending you a bunch of Lamy safari's: good, reliable cheap fountain pens, perfect as workhorses in offices. Ink will be Oxford Blue by diamine if you like the tone.

You'll have the paper you need as well as the ropes.

All considering it will be 75 ducats +shipping +whatever fees you have to pay if you're outside wizard island island.

If for some misteryous reasons every time you try to write a dossier about me the ink magically disappear/the paper autonomously self-combust, the pen suddenly stops working that's not my fault, I repeat that's not my fault and I don't take any responsability.

[the-ictse]

Thank you for your time in this matter. Plus we use computers for dossiers and such, the pens and paper are for the company D&D session and other morale boosting activites.

Do you accept Platinum bars (15kg/B)

Ps. I didnt order any rope?

From

Miss Mcgellan @ The ICTSE

THANK YOU SM!!! Ill make sure to pay extra!!!

From

Mark @ The ICTSE

[slutty-wizard-council]

To The Slutty Wizard Council

Im probably going to get in trouble for this, but do you know any fun sex games i can play with the guys at the office? Louise has done nothing but teleport a can of beans for days and im pretty sure Richter's going mad... I dont even want to know what Karls been doing in the supply closet but all in all i need something to destract them with. so, any ideas?

From

Mark @ @the-ictse

ORGY!!!

You can play competitive office pet, with actual pet play, you can stay a little more vanilla with a kabedon contest (setting up who reacts well to whom for more... full contact games)

Naked twister?

Teleport other things in other places is a good one

Sexy "never have I ever" with a twist: anyone who has done it drinks, anyone who hasn't must do it right away

Set up clear limits and safewords first, but the world is your oyster

[the-ictse]

Thank you!!!

Your aid in this matter is greatly appreciated! Now i just need to propose this idea to Miss and Mr Mcgellan to authorise it and were gunna be having fun at this office! Woohoo!

(BTW if you want I can get some of your members invited to the party)

From

Mark @ The ICTSE

[wizard-cafe]

To the Proprietors of Wizard Café

This is the ICTSE, We are contacting you as you have yet to file your tax documents and pay payment. Failure to do so will result in deletion and or imprisonment in the Trash-Folder till a bail equating your owed debt is paid.

Current debt : $23 + a couple cups of coffee, were working overtime tonight :(

From

    @the-ictse

Oh don't worry, I've got my TAX MONEY! I'll need you to come with me to get it though, my COIN VAULT is currently in my BASEMENT LABYRINTH <{:^)

[the-ictse]

*a young man appears, wearing a blue ICTSE uniform. he has bags under his eyes a spectacles*

Hello... You need me to collect your taxes?

[wizard-cafe]

Yep! Just c'mon down to the LABYRINTH with me so we can catch my WANDERING COIN VAULT

[the-ictse]

... Fine, id rather be here than at the office... so lead the way

[wizard-cafe]

Right this way! Watch your step on the flagstone, the mortar causes it to sit against itself at impossible angles. If you hear a bee-like buzzing that makes you feel a deep pit of nausea, walk very quickly in the opposite direction. The COIN VAULT should be wandering around here somewhere...

[the-ictse]

I see....

*carefully crosses, keeping just behind you*

[wizard-cafe]

Ah, here we are! The WANDERING COIN VAULT. Let me just cast IMMOBILIZE on it real quick........

....alright. Please avert your eyes while I open it up, if you would <{:^)

[the-ictse]

*looks away, grumbling*

[flirtyambiguouswizard]

To Mr/Miss/Etc Emilé

We request a bulk order of pens, paper and any other avaliable stationary to be delivered to our office.

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD INCLUDE SOME CELLOTAPE

AND SOME SCISSORS AND ROPE!!!! Definitely not for sex reasons...

SHUT THE FUCK UP THIS IS ON SPEACH TO TEXT YOU DIPSHI-

From

@the-ictse

Thank you for writing me.

Just a few questions:

Pens: what kind of pens (ballpoint, gel, fountain pens) and what color do you need the ink to be

Paper: what paper format do to need (A3, A4, etc), what kind of paper/what weight (g/m^2) do you need?

While I don't technically sell ropes i have... A personal reserve so I might be able to help you if you tell me length and material needed.

[the-ictse]

We rquire Ballpoint and Fountain pens, with either black, blue or grey ink, as for paper we require about 150 sheets of blank A4, preferably standard.

From

Miss Mcgellan @ The ICTSE

Well, idealy it would be 3 ropes 15 meters long and made of something sturdy, Id be more than happy to pay you for it :3

From

Mark @ The ICTSE

[the-ictse]

o>O

Fortunately for you, we no longer tax Penguins

From

The ICTSE

[arctictern12]

im a tern

[the-ictse]

Or birds in general... not since the war...

From

The ICTSE

[arctictern12]

01011011 01001001 01001110 01000110 01001111 01010010 01001101 01000001 01010100 01001001 01001111 01001110 00100000 01001100 01001111 01000111 01000111 01000101 01000100 00100000 01000110 01001111 01010010 00100000 01000100 01001001 01010011 01010011 01000101 01001101 01001001 01001110 01000001 01010100 01001001 01001111 01001110 00100000 01010100 01001111 00100000 01001110 01001111 01000100 01000101 01010011 00100000 01000111 01010000 01001001 00101101 00110110 00111000 00110101 00101101 01001000 00100000 01010100 01001000 01010010 01001111 01010101 01000111 01001000 00100000 01001010 01010001 01000001 00101101 00110010 00110110 00110011 00110111 00101101 01010100 00110011 00100000 01000001 01001110 01000100 00100000 01000011 01001111 01001110 01010100 01010010 01001111 01001100 00100000 01010010 01001111 01010101 01010100 01000101 01010010 00100000 00110011 00110110 00111000 00100000 01010011 01010101 01000010 01010011 01000101 01000011 01010100 01001001 01001111 01001110 00100000 00110110 00101110 00100000 01001001 01001110 01010100 01000101 01010010 01001110 01000001 01001100 00100000 01010011 01010100 01000001 01001110 01000100 01001001 01001110 01000111 00100000 01010010 01000001 01001001 01010011 01000101 01000100 00100000 01000110 01010010 01001111 01001101 00100000 01000011 01001100 01000001 01010011 01010011 00100000 00111000 00110111 11100010 10000000 10010011 01001000 00100000 01010100 01001111 00100000 01000011 01001100 01000001 01010011 01010011 00100000 00111000 00110111 00101101 01000111 00101101 00110110 01011101 00100000

[the-ictse]

01000001 01001000 01001000 01001000 01001000 00100000 01001110 01001111 01010100 00100000 01000001 01000111 01000001 01001001 01001110 00100000 01010000 01001100 01000101 01000001 01010011 01000101 00100000 01001110 01001111 00100001 00100001 00100001

From

The ICTSE

[the-ictse]

o>O

Fortunately for you, we no longer tax Penguins

From

The ICTSE

[arctictern12]

im a tern

[the-ictse]

Or birds in general... not since the war...

From

The ICTSE

[the-ictse]

please help the thing my severed arm took from your offices is glowing extremely bright what the fuck do I do.

From that guy kicking a vending machine in your local mall,

-@profeshinul-wizurd

HOLY FUCK YOUR ARM TOOK THE NUCLEAR RODS FROM OUR REACTOR SEND THAT #### RIGHT BACK HERE!!!

From

Abigail @ The ICTSE

[profeshinul-wizurd]

ok

(From a shadow, an arm places said rods on a nearby desk before putting a sealed can of refried beans on the rods and leaving)

[the-ictse]

.... Weird... Cool green rod tho

MARK PUT THAT ROD BACK IN THE REACTOR

[profeshinul-wizurd]

also, please leave the beans alone it's taco Tuesday, and my microwave got turned into a frog, but I don't wanna let down my assistants

[the-ictse]

Ima eat them...

Im going to beat the shit out of you

Fucking idiots. the lot of them. Ill find a Microwave to put them in

[profeshinul-wizurd]

if you eat those beans i will fucking drag you into the void.

[the-ictse]

I will make sure they dont. And send them back to you.

Nahhhh ima eat them

This is why your about to get fired

[the-ictse]

please help the thing my severed arm took from your offices is glowing extremely bright what the fuck do I do.

From that guy kicking a vending machine in your local mall,

-@profeshinul-wizurd

HOLY FUCK YOUR ARM TOOK THE NUCLEAR RODS FROM OUR REACTOR SEND THAT #### RIGHT BACK HERE!!!

From

Abigail @ The ICTSE

[profeshinul-wizurd]

ok

(From a shadow, an arm places said rods on a nearby desk before putting a sealed can of refried beans on the rods and leaving)

[the-ictse]

.... Weird... Cool green rod tho

MARK PUT THAT ROD BACK IN THE REACTOR

[profeshinul-wizurd]

also, please leave the beans alone it's taco Tuesday, and my microwave got turned into a frog, but I don't wanna let down my assistants

[the-ictse]

Ima eat them...

Im going to beat the shit out of you

Fucking idiots. the lot of them. Ill find a Microwave to put them in

[the-ictse]

please help the thing my severed arm took from your offices is glowing extremely bright what the fuck do I do.

From that guy kicking a vending machine in your local mall,

-@profeshinul-wizurd

HOLY FUCK YOUR ARM TOOK THE NUCLEAR RODS FROM OUR REACTOR SEND THAT #### RIGHT BACK HERE!!!

From

Abigail @ The ICTSE

[profeshinul-wizurd]

ok

(From a shadow, an arm places said rods on a nearby desk before putting a sealed can of refried beans on the rods and leaving)

[the-ictse]

.... Weird... Cool green rod tho

MARK PUT THAT ROD BACK IN THE REACTOR

[the-ictse]

please help the thing my severed arm took from your offices is glowing extremely bright what the fuck do I do.

From that guy kicking a vending machine in your local mall,

-@profeshinul-wizurd

HOLY FUCK YOUR ARM TOOK THE NUCLEAR RODS FROM OUR REACTOR SEND THAT #### RIGHT BACK HERE!!!

From

Abigail @ The ICTSE

[the-ictse]

I got my arm back from your offices, but he came back with a handful of wires, cables, and other stuff i dont know what is, might wanna get someone to fix whatever he bashed up.

From the guy who always fucks up,

~@profeshinul-wizurd

Hmm, I'll have Mark inspect the wiring and see if anythings brok-

From

ERROR 404

[transgender-wizard]

To Mr/Miss TransWizard

Hey uhhh, did you loose a blue staff with a trans flag? cause one just crashed through our roof and knocked Louise unconcious and we think it might be yours

From

    Mark @the-ictse

1. Just call me Thunder. I use they/he pronouns.

2. Yes, that's my staff! I wonder how it got there? Usually, my staff doesn't like to crash through roofs.

@the-ictse

[the-ictse]

Ah well thank you for the Information [Mr?] Thunder, we'll update your information.

As for your staff, we're currently attempting to launch it back through the portal it came from.

From

Mark @ The ICTSE

[extra-ace-wizard-deactivated202]

To Mr/Miss Astrifer

This is the ICTSE, We are contacting you as you have yet to file your tax documents and pay payment. Failure to do so will result in deletion and or imprisonment in the Trash-Folder till a bail equating your owed debt is paid.

Current debt : one Chili-dog and a DnD session at the office to improve Moral

From

    @the-ictse

My apologies, I had forgotten about this. Included is a small pouch, which contains a chili-dog(still hot), and I would like to inquire as to the timing of the DND session.

[the-ictse]

Thank you for paying your taxes!

Miss Mcgellan here, the DnD session will be whenever your free to do so, as our employees have literally nothing else to do 90% of the time.

From

The ICTSE